Best Friends...Forever?

by Krysten Lindsay Hager

  Oh, good one! Way to have my back. Yes, I would never have come up with that on my own.

  "Hmm. Because I heard it's because he likes Yasmin now. Did he cheat on you, or what?" Maggie asked.

  All of a sudden my grilled-cheese sandwich tasted like a wet, greasy sponge, and the little bits I had swallowed were hitting my stomach like tiny bricks. Did that jerk cheat on me? I thought he had liked me.

  "Maggie, I told you, Landry is super private, and she isn't going to talk about a bunch of stupid rumors," Devon said.

  "Can't she speak for herself?" Maggie asked.

  "Whatever went on is between him and me, and I'm not going to say anything bad about him," I said.

  By the time I got to social studies, the story was that I thought I was a big "modeling superstar" and was "paranoid and delusional that some tabloid blog would pick up what I had to say about my ex." Ericka told me she heard people laughing and saying, "Who does she think she is? Who cares what some fake model does? No one knows who she is."

  Peyton told me to ignore it. India just traced hearts on her notebook cover. I walked past Yasmin in the hall after class, and she went out of her way to avoid my eyes. She ducked her head like celebrities did when they wanted to hide from photographers. I felt like throwing up.

  After school, I went to get on the bus, and it felt like everyone got strangely quiet. Maybe it was just my imagination, or maybe people had been talking about me two seconds before I got on. Naturally, all my friends sat in the back, so I had to walk to the end and notice everyone staring at me. I never realized how long the bus aisle was until I was forced to walk the whole thing while on display. It was similar to being on a runway, except I felt the words "loser" and "reject" flashing over my head.

  I noticed Ashanti was staring out the window. She didn't tell Halle and Maggie to ask me about Vladi, did she? No, she wouldn't do that. As mad as she might have been at me, she'd have never let them humiliate me and make me feel bad, right? I sat down next to Tori.

  "I feel so bad for you," she said. "You should just tell everyone you dumped Vladi and not the other way around."

  Ericka nodded. "Yeah, let him feel like the humiliated loser for a change."

  Did she mean that the way it sounded? I sighed. Probably. "No, I'm not going to lie. I'm not even going to acknowledge it. I don't know if he's dating Yasmin or what, so there's nothing to say right now. It's none of my business what he does anymore."

  "Exactly, just move on," Peyton said.

  "But it is your business because he's totally embarrassed you in front of everybody. I mean, two whole schools are talking about how you got dumped," Ericka said.

  "Ericka, you're not helping," Devon said.

  "What? I just feel soooo bad about it all. He's a jerk."

  Devon asked if I wanted to come over after school, but I shook my head. I just wanted to be alone and hide under the covers.

  As soon as the bus dropped me off, I went into the house and started to make a sundae. But after I put the first scoop of vanilla ice cream in the bowl, I realized I wasn't that hungry. Maybe it was because Vladi and I used to get ice cream together, or maybe it was because I was a pathetic "dumpee" who had everyone feeling sorry for her. Well, that wasn't completely true, seeing as there were apparently all those people laughing at me because I supposedly thought I was a celebrity. When did life become so complicated? Maybe that was the real reason my grandmothers didn't want me to date. They were totally right. Boys were a distraction from schoolwork — and life. Stupid boys. Stupid Yasmin. Stupid world.

  My phone rang. It was Peyton.

  "You okay?" she asked when I answered.

  "I guess."

  "Maybe you should find out from him what's going on," she said. "I mean, it's better than not knowing, right?"

  That wasn't necessarily true. If I knew for certain he'd broke up with me for Yasmin, then I would have to face that. I'd rather put my head in the sand and ignore it until it was right in my face, and I had no choice. Besides, what was I supposed to do if I found out it was true? Congratulate them? Ignore her? Yell at her? I was so not good at confrontation. I told Peyton that I just wanted to take a nap, and we got off the phone. It rang again, and I answered, assuming she forgot to tell me something.

  "Yeah?"

  "Landry?"

  "Yeah?"

  "It's India."

  "Oh…hi."

  "Do you want to…come over tomorrow and, like, have dinner or whatever?" she asked.

  "I have to ask my mom, but I'm sure it's okay."

  "Um, do you want my parents to pick you up or something?"

  "No, you don't live that far, so my mom can drop me off."

  "Okay, well…see ya after school…I mean, I'll see you in school, too, but…whatever. Bye," she said.

  That was weird and super random. I had never gone to her house alone before and suddenly, after turning two of my friends against me, she wants to hang out? I didn't get any bad vibes from her, but it did seem odd. She wasn't going to tell me about Vladi and Yasmin, was she?

  The next day was a blur as I went through the halls, wondering who was feeling sorry for me and who was laughing at me. I wanted to think I was being paranoid, but then Kyle made a joke about me being the "also-ran contestant" once again. Then he gave me a fake smile and said, "Kidding, totally kidding." Yeah, right. Jerk.

  Thalia told him to grow up, and he glared at her and then walked away. Wow, she was probably going to pay for standing up for me.

  I thanked Thalia, and she said, "You should have said to him, 'Kyle, if there is anything to that rumor, then it just means Yasmin cheated on your dumb butt, too.'"

  "Oh wow, you're right. How come I didn't think about that?"

  She shrugged.

  After school, we were walking to the buses when I heard something hit the ground. There was Thalia on her hands and knees with her books and bag strewn all over the ground, and people were laughing. Stuart and Kyle were standing to the side smirking. It was obvious one of them tripped her and then stepped back to make her look like a klutz. Peyton and I ran over to help gather her stuff. I saw Ashanti putting papers back into Thalia's folder.

  "Sorry," I said to Thalia as we all put her stuff into her bag. She didn't look at me, and I could see she was fighting back tears. Thalia got up and hurried to her bus. Kyle was already gone.

  We all walked out to the buses, but no one felt like talking — except for Ericka, who claimed she heard from a friend, who heard from a friend, who got her hair done by this girl's aunt, who was supposedly best friends with Vladi's cousin, and she had seen him buying Yasmin a present.

  "Seriously? What kind of present?" Tori asked.

  "I think it was, like, flowers or something. I dunno."

  I just stared out the window. India got off the bus, but she didn't say anything to me like, "See you later." Maybe she didn't want Devon to know I was coming over and have her get jealous or something. I still didn't know why she had invited me. I just hoped she didn't tell me she was dating Vladi now.

  Mom took me over to India's right at six, and her father answered the door. He was a lot older than my dad and seemed the way I pictured a dad on a TV show to look with his stern expression and golf shirt. He seemed nice as he invited me in and offered me a soda. Mr. Allen said India and her mom weren't back yet but that we'd eat as soon as they came home. We sat there as I drank my cherry cola and watched the news.

  "So, Landry, how's school going?" he asked.

  "Great, yeah…going good….I mean, well."

  "Do you play any sports?" he asked.

  Not unless shopping counted or worrying about random things that would probably never happen — I was very good at obsessing over that sort of stuff. I shook my head.

  "Any after school activities or clubs?"

  I tried to get as much TV watching in as I could without my mom getting on my case, which was no small feat. "Well, I like to read and I do some modeling once in a while on the weekends
."

  "Oh right, you're the one with the…contest…or something or other. How's that going for you?"

  I dunno, sir, would you enjoy being put in kids' clothes when you're a teen and made to look like a little girl?

  "It's going well. I'm…enjoying it."

  "Oh, well, that's good to hear. It's good to have goals. Your parents must be proud," he said.

  Well, my mom did tell me I was "precious" in that little lamb sweater the people at Wee Fashions put on me, so if we were counting that, then yes, yes, they were quite proud.

  India and her mom walked in then. They apologized for being late and said they had an errand to run at the mall. Her mom went to get the food out, and we helped. She had made some delicious-smelling chicken and rice dish with green beans, and for dessert we had lemon pudding. I had never had that flavor before, but it was great. And I could tell it was homemade and not out of a cup with an aluminum foil seal on it. After we ate, we went back to India's room.

  "I felt bad about how things played out and, at first, I thought maybe you didn't call me out because you didn't want to get into a big fight or whatever, but then I realized, you were just…letting me off the hook, or whatever. That was super nice," she said.

  I shrugged. "My dad said I should put myself in your shoes. I mean, I was mad at you and…" I took a deep breath. "And I'm not sorry I told the truth."

  She nodded. "I know. Devon told me. You were a better friend to me than I was to you. I kind of suck, actually."

  I laughed.

  "Anyway, I wanted to make it up to you. We were supposed to all get these together, and I felt like…well, here," she said, handing me a box.

  I opened it, and inside was the druzy crystal butterfly necklace. It was the exact one I wanted — the one that was blue at the top, then purple, and green."We planned to get them together, so I wanted to get yours to apologize, and Devon and Peyton each gave me five bucks toward it. That's the one you wanted, right? They told me it was the one with the most blue in it."

  I nodded. "That was super nice of you."

  "Yeah, well, you deserve it. So can we put all that junk behind us?"

  "I appreciate the necklace, but…" Be brave. Be bold. "Can you promise me you won't do anything like that to me again? Because I'm sick of fake friends."

  I felt so much better saying that until I realized her parents were supposed to take me home tonight. Getting a ride later might be awkward if India wasn't thrilled with my newfound confidence.

  "I won't, and I know how you feel. I think I acted like that because I'm so used to fake friends — not Peyton and Devon, but so many of the other people at school. Like Yasmin and, seriously, why are you still friends with Ericka?" India asked.

  I stared down at my hands.

  "Sorry, didn't mean to put you on the spot. But no, I won't do anything like that again. Just watch yourself around Ericka."

  "She says she feels bad about the whole Vladi/Yasmin thing, but she's the one making me feel worse by constantly bringing it up."

  "Does Vladi know about our whole fight thing?" she asked.

  I nodded. "But he doesn't know we're friends again."

  She bit her lip. "Doug is friends with people who know him. I could text him."

  "Would Devon kill you?"

  "Not if I'm just doing it to clear up stupid drama. Okay, I'm asking him if he heard anything about Vladi Yagudin having a new girlfriend," she said.

  I pulled my knees to my chest as we waited for a reply.

  "Anything yet?"

  "He says he hasn't heard anything, but he's asking if I like Vladi now or something. What do I say? That I'm just curious?"

  I nodded. "Say you're asking for a friend that likes him."

  "Oh wow, he just asked if that friend is Yasmin. I'm saying it's not."

  I held my breath, and she told me, "All he's heard is some cheerleader keeps hanging around the guys when they play ball after school, but he doesn't know anything else."

  "If Vladi has a new girlfriend, then I just want to move on and ignore it…but…"

  "But?"

  "If he started seeing her before telling me he just wanted to be friends…then that's different."

  My phone showed a new text, and I jumped. "Oh, it's Ericka saying we should all go to movie night at the high school tomorrow. That could be fun. Wanna go?"

  I started to text back when India snatched the phone out of my hands. "Wait, tell her you're not sure you can go, and then let's go and see if Vladi brings anyone."

  "Wait, why are we telling her I'm not going then?"

  "Landry, let's be honest, if Vladi walks in with, like, Yasmin or half the girls' soccer team, do you want to hear a night of Ericka telling you how she feels bad for you?"

  I shook my head and sighed.

  "Okay, so we go and see what he does," she said. "And then we'll walk past him and show him you're not sitting home alone and depressed."

  "And if he is with Yasmin?"

  "Then, depending on how brave you feel, you can confront him, or we can glare at him from across the gym. Your call," she said.

  I nodded. We decided to get Peyton and Devon to go with us but not mention it to Tori.

  "I feel guilty not telling Tori the truth," I said.

  "It's up to you if you want Ericka there."

  I shook my head. "Can we invite Thalia?"

  I texted Thalia, but her parents said they didn't think the high school movie night was "well-chaperoned," so she couldn't come. The plan was set. All I had to do was show up and see what was going on with my ex.

  Chapter Twenty

  Friday could go on record as the fastest day ever. It flew by, and pretty soon I was back in my room getting ready to see if Vladi and Yasmin were a couple. I felt like puking and could only hope that stayed as just a feeling. Peyton's mom dropped her off so we could get ready together. She helped me with my hair and brought over her turquoise Franciszka T sweater for me to wear. I knew this one cost a lot and hoped I didn't spill anything on it. Even Peyton seemed unsure and asked if it'd be cool if I only drank water and clear soda tonight.

  "Okay, your hair looks hot. Now makeup," she said.

  "I was thinking smoky eyes," I said, holding up a picture of the model, Rae Ellen.

  "Um, I think the natural look might be better for tonight," she said.

  "But he broke up with me because I was too young."

  "Well you can't go from fourteen to forty overnight. We'll do a little shadow. Like that sparkly champagne color. That's pretty."

  "Liner?" I asked, reaching for a black eye pencil.

  She shook her head. "I want you to look like you're not trying to get his attention. I want him to see what he's missing out on."

  What — a kid who wasn't good enough for him the first time around?

  "There, that lip gloss is super pretty on you," she said. "Okay, see what you think."

  I stared at myself in the mirror. It was like me, just a little better. More defined, but not like I was wearing a lot of makeup.

  Devon's mom came and picked us up, and Devon and India were in the back. I squeezed in with them, and Peyton sat in the front. My hands were sweaty and I said a little prayer that everything would be okay. We got to the gym, and there were a ton of people there. The first person I saw was Ashanti sitting with Halle. I felt so lost, and even though she and Halle had been friends long before I ever came along, I felt replaced. My heart hurt. Then I saw Ashanti's face change. Oh crap. She saw I had the butterfly necklace on. My night was ruined.

  "Landry, Vladi's here, but he's not sitting with a girl. Just some guys," India said. "Hey, what's wrong?"

  "Nothing, I…I just want to get out of here."

  "Why?" she asked.

  I realized going home to cry over Ashanti wasn't going to prove anything, but I realized that it didn't matter if Vladi had a new girlfriend, the real person I was missing was my best friend. Having Peyton back had healed a lot of that, but it wasn't the same witho
ut both my best friends. Peyton was staring at me.

  "What's going on?" she asked.

  I wasn't going to hurt her feelings, so I shook my head and said I was fine and that it was just nerves. We sat where we could see Vladi from a distance and watched as Yasmin and Arianna came in with their crew. Yasmin had severe smoky eyeliner on and pale glossy lips. She had leather pants on with a soft beige cowl-neck sweater and looked at least seventeen. Then she moved her head so her ponytail swung from side to side, calling more attention to her.

  "Why not just get a flashing sign saying, 'Look at me?'" Devon said.

  "I think the pants are pretty much getting that idea across," India said.

  Yasmin walked right past Vladi, and I stared at him, but all he did was blink and start playing with his phone.

  "Is he texting her?" Devon asked.

  "No, she doesn't seem to be pulling out her phone. Look — she's going past him again," India said.

  That time she said something to him and gave him a big smile. He nodded at her and went back to his phone.

  Peyton and I exchanged a look. "Seems like they're not together."

  "Oh whoops, Tori and Ericka just walked in. Maybe they won't see us," India said, sliding down in her folding chair.

  "Why?" Peyton asked.

  "Landry?"

  Ericka was staring at me.

  "I thought you said you didn't think you could come tonight," she said as her eyes bore into mine.

  "I…"

  "It was all last minute," India said.

  Ericka crossed her arms.

  "Yeah, she didn't know she was going to come — she even had to borrow a sweater from me," Peyton said. "And we were playing around with makeup and hair stuff."

  "Oh, well I was going to say, it looks less flat," Ericka said.

  She was talking all sweet to Peyton, India, and Devon — because she'd never have risked getting on their bad side — but still managed to get the dig in about my hair.

  "Landry, you're not here to do some super psycho stalker thing with Vladi, are you?" Ericka asked.

  "No, I'm here to watch a movie. Why are you here?" I asked.

  All the girls stared at me, and I realized I came across a little harsh.