The Cook's Secret Ingredient

by Meg Maxwell

  Although not nearly as rough as the weeks, months, preceding it.

  Emily’s gaze softened. Along with that damn mouth. Yeah, sympathy was the last thing he needed right now.

  “From?”

  Since his name was plastered all over the magazine spread along with the photos, it wasn’t exactly a secret. “Serbia.”

  A moment of silence preceded, “And why do I get the feeling I should leave it there?”

  His mouth tugged up on one side. “Because you’re good at reading minds?”

  She almost snorted, even as something like pain flashed across her features. “As if. Then again...” Her gaze slid to his, so impossible to read he wondered if he’d imagined the pain in it. “Perhaps some minds are easier to read than others?”

  Nope, not taking the bait. Even if he’d had a clue what the bait was. His arms folded across a layer of denim more disreputable than his yet-to-appear duffel, he said, “You get on in DC? Or Dallas?”

  “DC.”

  “And nobody’s picking you up?”

  Her mouth twisted. “It was kind of last-minute. So I told Dee I’d rent a car, save her or Josh the five-hour round trip. They’ve got their hands full enough with the kids and the ranch stuff this time of year, and I can find my own way.” Her eyes swung to his again. “What about you?”

  “They don’t know I’m here.”

  That got a speculative look before she snapped to attention like a bird dog. “Oh, there’s one of my bags—”

  “Which one?”

  “The charcoal metallic with the rose trim. And there’s the two others. But you don’t have to—”

  “No problem,” Colin said, lugging the three hard-sided bags off the belt. Gray with pink stripes. Fancy. And no doubt expensive. His gaze once more flicked over her outfit, her hair and nails, even as his nostrils flared at her light, floral perfume.

  Rich girl whispered through his brain, as another memory or two shuffled along for the ride, that his new sister-in-law’s mother had hailed from a socially prominent East Coast family, that there’d been murmurings about how Deanna’s aunt hadn’t been exactly thrilled when her only sister took up with a cowboy and moved to the New Mexico hinterlands. Something about her throwing her life away. A life that had ended far too soon, when Deanna had only been a teenager.

  Not that any of this had anything to do with him. Didn’t then, sure as hell didn’t now. Never mind the knee-to-the-groin reaction to the charmed life this young woman had undoubtedly led. The sort of life that tended to leave its participants with high expectations and not a whole lot of understanding for those whose lives weren’t nearly so privileged—

  “Hey. You okay?”

  Colin gave his head a sharp shake, refusing to believe he saw genuine concern in those blue eyes. Apparently the long trip had chewed up more than a few brain cells.

  “I’m fine. Or will be,” he said as he grabbed his bag off the belt, dumping its sorry, chewed-up self on the airport’s floor beside the shiny trio. “Nothing a shower, some food and a real bed won’t fix.” Not to mention some sorely needed alone time. “And the sooner we get—” home, he’d started to say, startling himself “—back to the Vista, the sooner I can make that happen.” Slinging the duffel over his shoulder with the camera bag and commandeering the smaller two of Emily’s bags, he nodded toward the rental car desk across the floor. “So let’s go get our cars and get out of here.”

  Jerking up the handle of the larger bag, Emily frowned. “Um...why rent two cars? Wouldn’t it make more sense to share one? Besides, don’t take this the wrong way, but you do not look like someone up for driving through a couple hundred miles of nothing. In the dark, especially. So I’ll drive, how’s that?”

  That got a momentary sneer from the old male ego—because Old Skool Dude here, the man was supposed to drive—until weariness slammed into him like a twenty-foot tidal wave. And along with it logic, because the woman had a point. Didn’t make a whole lot of sense to rent two separate vehicles when they were going to the same place.

  Not to mention the fact that passing out and careening into a ravine somewhere wasn’t high on his to-do list. However...

  “You might not want to be confined with me in a closed space for two-and-a-half hours.” Her brows lifted. “I think I smell.”

  She laughed. “Not that I’ve noticed. But it’s warm enough we can leave the windows open.”

  “Once we get up past Santa Fe? Doubtful. Spring doesn’t really get going good until May, at least.”

  A shrug preceded, “So I’ll put on another layer—”

  “But what’ll you do for a car once you’re there?”

  “Dee said there’s a truck I can use, if I want. So I was gonna turn in the rental tomorrow in Taos, anyway...”

  First off, that shrug? Made her hair shimmer around her shoulders, begging to be touched. So wrong. Second, the image of Emily’s perfectly polished person collided in Colin’s worn-to-nubs brain with whatever undoubtedly mud-caked 4x4 her cousin was referring to. The ranch vehicles weren’t known for being pretty.

  Unlike the woman with the shimmery hair who’d be driving one of them.

  So wrong.

  Then he dragged his head out of his butt long enough to catch the amused smile playing around her mouth. “You really have a problem sharing a ride with me?”

  Colin’s cheeks heated. “It’s not you.”

  “Actually, I got that. No, really. But I’m beginning to understand what Josh said about you being a loner—”

  “I’m not—”

  “Even I know you haven’t been home in years,” she said gently. “That you’ve barely been in touch with anyone since you left. And then you don’t even tell your family you’re coming back? Dude. However,” she said, heading toward the rental desk, her hair swishing against her back. Glimmering. Taunting. “My only goal right now is to get to the ranch.” She glanced back over her shoulder at him, and once again he saw a flicker of something decidedly sharp edged. “Expediency, you know? Your issues are none of my business. Nor are mine yours. In fact, we don’t even have to talk, if you don’t want to. I won’t be offended, I promise. So. Deal?”

  With the devil, apparently.

  “Deal,” Colin grumbled, hauling the rest of the bags to the desk, wondering why her reasonableness was pissing him the hell off.

  * * *

  An hour later, Emily had to admit Colin had been right about two things: the farther north they went, the colder it got; and he was definitely a little on the gamey side. Meaning she’d had no choice but to keep the windows at least partly down, or risk suffocation.

  Also, it was dark. As in, the headlight beams piercing the pitch blackness were creepy as all get-out. To her, night meant when the street lamps came on, not that moment when the sun dived behind the horizon and yanked every last vestige of daylight with it. Her heart punched against her ribs—so much for her oh-I’ll-drive bravado back there in the airport, when for whatever reason it hadn’t occurred to her she’d never actually driven the route before. Somebody had always ferried her to and from Albuquerque. Sure, she would’ve made the trek herself in any case, but being responsible for another human being in the car with her...

  “Jeez, get a grip,” she muttered, turning up the Sirius radio in the SUV, hoping the pulsing beat would pound her wayward thoughts into oblivion. Not to mention her regrets, crammed inside her head like the jumbled mess of old sweaters and jeans and tops she’d stuffed willy-nilly inside her pretty new luggage. Clothes that predated Michael, that she’d rarely worn around him because he’d said they made her look dumpy.

  Emily’s nostrils flared as her fingers tightened around the leather-padded wheel. Someday, she might even cry.

  Someday. When she was over the hurling and cursing stage.

  Beside
her, a six-feet-and-change Colin snorted and shifted, his arms folded over his chest as he slept. They’d barely made it out of Albuquerque before he’d crashed, his obvious exhaustion rolling off him in waves even more than the funk. If it hadn’t been for that picture Dee had shown Emily—a very serious publicity shot of Colin the photojournalist—she would’ve never recognized him. As it was, between the five days’ beard growth and shaggy hair, the rumpled clothes and saddlebags under his eyes, she still wasn’t sure how she had. It must’ve been the eyes, a weird pale green against his sun-weathered face—

  Emily released another breath, aggravation swamping her once more. Although with herself more than Colin, she supposed, for not having the good sense to leave well enough alone. Gah, it was as though she’d been totally incapable of stanching the words spewing from her mouth. Apparently heart-slicing betrayal had that effect on her. But seriously—after a lifetime of making nice, now she couldn’t resist poking the bear? And a grumpy, malodorous one at that?

  From her purse, her phone warbled. Her mother’s ringtone. Good thing she was currently driving, because... No.

  The man shifted again, muttering in his sleep, the words unintelligible. She imagined a frown—since that seemed to be his face’s default setting, anyway—

  “Crap!”

  At the laser-like flash of the animal’s eyes, Emily swerved the car to the right, hard, the wheels jittering over rocks and weeds before jerking to a spine-rattling stop. Colin’s palm slammed against the dash as he bellowed awake, a particularly choice swearword hanging in the cold air between them for what felt like an hour.

  “What the hell?”

  “S-something darted out in front of the c-car,” Emily finally got out, over the sudden—and horrifying—realization of exactly how close she was to losing it.

  “You okay?”

  How a gruff voice could be so gentle, Emily had no idea. How she was going to keep it together in the face of that gentleness, she had even less of one. But she would. If it killed her.

  Her neck hurt a little when she nodded. “I’m fine.”

  “You don’t sound fine.”

  On a half-assed laugh, she leaned her head back. Or would have if the headrest had let her. “I almost took out Bambi. What do you think?” She dared to cut her eyes to his, only to realize she couldn’t see them anyway. Thank goodness. “Sorry about the sudden stop. Is everything... Are you...?”

  “I’m good. Or will be when my heart climbs back down out of my throat.” Which he now cleared. “Good save, by the way.”

  “How would you know?” she said, even as pleasure flushed her cheeks. “Since you slept through it.”

  “We’re still upright. And alive. So I count that as a win.”

  “Funny, you don’t strike me as a look-on-the-bright-side type.”

  “You’d be surprised.”

  “I already am. Well.” And her heart could stop break-dancing anytime now, she thought as she gripped the wheel. “I guess we should get going—”

  “You’re shaking.”

  “Only a little... What are you doing?”

  This asked as he got out of the car and walked around to her side, motioning for her to open the door. “Taking over the driving, what does it look like?”

  “You don’t have to—”

  “Actually, I think I do.”

  Emily felt her face go grumpy. “I thought you said that was a good save.”

  “It was. And I mean that. But I’m awake now—”

  “Sorry about that.”

  “—and I’m probably a little better at recovering from stress than you are.”

  “Heh. You ever driven on the DC beltway?”

  “Many times. Although trust me, it doesn’t even begin to compare with Mumbai. Besides, once we hit town, do you have any idea where we’re going?”

  There was that. Because, again, she hadn’t driven when she’d been out before. Of course her plan had been to either rely on the car’s GPS or—probably better—on Dee or Josh. Which she could still do. But by now she realized she was beginning to slip across that fine line between independent and mule-headed. And she was whacked, too.

  “Emily?”

  Again with the gentleness. Jerk.

  “Fine,” she said, climbing down from behind the wheel and marching around to the passenger side, huddling deeper into her sweater coat before strapping herself in. Rocks crunched and rattled as Colin pulled back onto the highway, and Emily felt her jangled nerves relax. A little.

  Because for some reason this guy seemed a lot bigger awake than he had asleep. And she wasn’t exactly tiny. A fact that had apparently induced no small amount of angst in her petite mother—

  “So where are we, exactly?” Colin asked.

  “Just past Taos.”

  He nodded. “You mind if I turn down the...music?”

  “Turn it off, if you want. I don’t care.”

  “You sure?”

  “I’m sure.”

  Except the silence that followed made her brain hurt. Strange how she didn’t mind the quiet when she was actually by herself. But when there was actually someone else in the space—

  “So how come you didn’t tell anyone you were coming?”

  He hesitated, then said, “Because I didn’t want to.”

  “None of my business, in other words.”

  His gaze veered to hers, then away.

  “And you don’t think they might find it weird when we show up together?”

  A single-note chuckle pushed through his nose. “Dog with a bone, aren’t cha?”

  Her mouth pulled flat, Emily shoved her hair behind her ear. But after years of being the peacemaker, the One Most Likely to Back Down... “Guess I don’t have a whole lot of patience these days for secrets.”

  “Even though this has nothing to do with you.”

  “Me, no. My cousin, yes. And her husband. And his family. So...”

  “And you’re nothing if not loyal.”

  She waited out the stab to her heart before saying, “Out of fashion though that might be.”

  That got a look. Probably accompanied by a frown, though she wasn’t about to check.

  Another couple miles passed before he said, “And I’m guessing I’ve been the topic of conversation recently.”

  “Your name does come up a lot,” she said quietly, then glanced over. “Since, you know, you’re the brother who’s not there. And hasn’t been there for years.”

  Seconds passed. “I’ve been...on assignment.”

  Exactly what Josh had said, after his and Dee’s wedding, his that’s-life shrug at complete odds with the disappointment in his eyes. And between the leftover shakiness from nearly taking out that deer back there and feeling like hornets had set up shop inside her brain, whatever filters Emily might have once had were blown to hell.

  “From everything I can tell, Colin, your family’s great. In fact, most people would be grateful...” Tears biting at her eyes, she gave her head a sharp shake, rattling the hornets. “So what exactly did they do to tick you off so much?”

  * * *

  And to think, Colin mused, if he hadn’t agreed to this crazy woman’s suggestion to share the car, the worst that might’ve happened would have been his ending up in a ditch somewhere.

  Of course, he didn’t owe her, or anyone, an explanation. Although she seemed like a nice enough kid—if pushy—and surprisingly playing the total bastard card wasn’t part of his skill set. Besides, in a half hour they’d be there, and he’d hole up in one of the cabins, and she’d stay with her cousin in the main house, and they probably wouldn’t even see each other again for the duration of her visit. Right?

  Except right now she was watching him, waiting for an answer, those great, big, sad eyes p
inned to the side of his face. Yeah, there was a story there, no doubt. Not that he was about to get sucked in. Because he’d come home to get his head on straight again, not get all snarled in someone else’s.

  “They didn’t do anything, okay?” he finally mumbled. “Like you said, they’re great people. It’s just we don’t see a lot of things through the same lens.”

  He sensed more than saw her frown before she leaned into the corner between the seat and the door—at least as much as the seat belt would let her—her arms folded over her stomach. Thinking, no doubt.

  “So what’s different now?”

  “Do you even consider what’s about to pop out of your mouth before it does?”

  “Probably about as much as you’ve considered their reaction when you show up out of the blue. And with your dad’s heart condition—”

  “First off, people keeling over from shock only happens in the movies—”

  “Not only in the movies.”

  “Mostly, then. And second, Dad’s not at death’s door. He never was, as far as I can tell—”

  “And how would you know that if you haven’t been there?”

  “Because that’s what he said, okay? For crying out loud, I did talk to him, or Mom, or both, every day at the time. I’m not totally out of the loop—”

  “Even if you prefer to hover at its edge?”

  If it hadn’t been for the gentle humor in her voice—and something more, something he couldn’t quite put his finger on—he would’ve been a lot more pissed than he was. “They told me not to come home, that it wasn’t necessary. And my reasons for returning now...” He briefly faced her, then looked away. “Are mine.”

  “As are your reasons for not giving them a heads-up that you are. Got it.”

  “You’re really aggravating, you know that?”

  Her laugh startled him. “Then my work here is done,” she said, clearly pleased with herself. Because the chick was downright bonkers. Story of his life, apparently.