The Risen (Book 4): Courage

by Marie F. Crow

  “Sweetheart,” Rhett starts, pulling the words out into an almost syrupy drawl. “I didn’t tell them anything then and I didn’t admit to anything now. You did that all on your own.”

  He has a point and you can almost hear the light switch turn on as it hits home with Aimes. “So wait,” she says with the furrows framing her forehead with her thoughts, “you’re saying since Hells was not available, then it had to be me? If Hells was up and around, it never would have crossed your minds it was me?”

  My wrapper is just levels upon levels of interesting and I stare at it, lost in the amazement. I might have to slip lower into my chair to fully enjoy the sight of it.

  “No,” Lawless’ voice is deep with menace, “ it being Hells never would have crossed my mind one way or another.”

  I’m still staring at the wrapper of long gone chocolate but I can still feel the weight of the room. I slip a little lower into my chair pleading with the pain it causes me to be understanding. Searing stiches or the focus of many stares? Sorry, but the stiches are out of luck.

  “Now if Dolph were to mention something, he might have concerns.” Rhett stands under the disguise of stretching, but he’s really prepping for a reaction from Lawless.

  Lawless doesn’t jump on the bait, but he’s ready to and he lets the other man know it. “Is that really smart from a man whose fate hasn’t been decided yet?”

  “It’s not my fate I’m warning you about, Brother.” Rhett looks to me and I have no idea where he is taking us now. “Since we are holding confession, you going to tell him?”

  “Tell him what?” I’m not being sly. I really am without a clue as to what he is asking about.

  “Selma saw you and Dolph. She told me all about it.”

  “Her and Dolph what?” Now, Lawless is jumping.

  I’m still scrambling. “I don’t know what you are talking about.”

  Rhett stares at me as well as Chapel, my keeper, as he tries to read me. “You told Dolph no, but not until after you let him do some exploring.”

  “Why did she tell you this?” Chapel has stood, placing himself closer to me as he asks his question.

  Rhett shrugs, but the motion doesn’t match his expression. “She said she had proof that Hells wasn’t the girl we think she is. We all think of her as being our little combat doll, but the whole time she’s making her own way on her back.”

  “You think that’s true?” Chapel asks the room letting his eyes stop on each male. I guess I should be thankful he didn’t feel the need to look to Aimes even as I do.

  “Payback is a bitch,” Rhett says recalling a little domestic meltdown inspired by J.D.’s plotting.

  “Men are really this stupid?” Aimes is asking me as she rolls her eyes over their indecisiveness. “Just climbing out on a wild limb here, but did she tell you this the day you hit Hells?”

  Rhett pauses and the look of his gears having to turn to remember is slightly comical. “Yeah, I guess.”

  “The same day that Hells threatened her?” Aimes pushes further.

  Rhett stands silent knowing where his ship is finally taking him – sinking.

  “You idiot, Hells is her only real threat. She knows that. She saw how it affected you when you hit Hells and took the chance to weave this tale while you were being stupid. She wanted you to have a reason to be mad at Hells to keep you from talking to her. It’s basic high school reindeer games. Now let’s all laugh and call you names.” Aimes looks to Lawless who sill stands ridged with his imagination holding him prisoner. “And if you believe it, then you are even more stupid than he is. So much for not running anymore?” When Lawless looks shocked by her words she wears a smirk similar to the one Rhett was adorned with when the ball was in his court. “Yeah, you boys aren’t the only ones who talk.”

  “If their plan is to do this thing of theirs,” Chapel pauses not even able to put words to the evil, “they would have to make sure we were out of the way for it to really work. We don’t have kids for them to use against us.”

  “We are the only ones not swallowing the punch, too,” Marxx adds.

  “…and if Travis really believes that Hells is the root of us, it would make sense to try to dissolve our trust with her. It would divide us pretty fast.” Chapel continues to debate more to himself than for anyone else in the room. Lawless still remains silent.

  “Maybe, but I still think she is just playing the jealous new girlfriend.” Aimes clings to her ideas, not from pride, but from fear of how much deeper their plans might reach if Chapel is correct. “Leslie was right there with her. I’m sure she’s very sharing with her opinions of the matter since she is still trying.”

  Law’s eyes swing to me again and I only arch an eyebrow to serve as my question. We have the world trying to eat us, a group trying to hang us so I really don’t care about the daily telephone game Selma has tried to play. He softly shakes his head and for now it’s a good enough answer for me. Perhaps I’ll help Leslie into a circle under a tree.

  “So nobody is sleeping with anybody and everyone is sleeping with someone. Great, glad that’s all worked out. Can we just figure out what we are going to do before they pick a tree?” I ask fully bored with it all and fully expecting to hear anyone’s voice other than the one that answers me.

  “Since the last tree in this place provided such happiness, who would be willing to pick another?” Selma asks, spinning the room to her direction. She is framed in the doorway with her simple blue jeans and white sweater offering a sweetness of the all-American girl.

  “Why are you here?” Rhett starts to walk to her with the training she has instilled in him. J.D. would have had a field day with them two. Sometimes, I really miss that man.

  “I was looking for you. I was starting to worry when I couldn’t find you,” Selma says placing her palms on either side of his face when he reaches where she is standing. She is melting with worry and it smells like burning plastic.

  Rhett is very aware of us watching him. He is being forced to finally declare a side and like I said, J.D. would not have missed this chance to make the big man break if he were here. The prince isn’t going to either.

  “Let one disaster into your door and more follow. You can also follow her back out. Don’t worry. We’ll come find you to tell you the results of the vote.” Lawless folds his arms across his chest as he relaxes back against the wall.

  This is Rhett’s last chance for survival with our group. If Lawless declares him dead, dead he will become. I’ve seen the missing persons report showcasing members of their club and their shrugs with blank stares that accompany when the police asked about it. I just never wanted to believe it. It’s easy to look away when your back isn’t shoved into a corner.

  “Last time I checked, this school was ours. That includes this floor and this door as well.” Selma smiles at Law and I have the spider sensation crawling along my arms again.

  “Last time I checked, this school belonged to Simon,” he tells her, still a relaxed gentle stance upon him.

  “Simon really isn’t in the position to be running anything. You should know that since it was your circle here that made him that way.” Selma spins her webs again trying to reopen sores that have since tried to scab and heal.

  “Even they don’t play that card anymore. You’re going to have to try harder than that,” I hear myself say in defense of the man and it brings me right into the middle of her attention.

  “Helena, how nice to see you up. Dolph was just asking about you,” she tries and I can’t stop the laughter from erupting from my throat. Aimes is right.

  “That’s nice. Rhett here was just asking about Aimes.” I stand letting her see the token I am wearing. “We were all just having a nice little chat about sinners, shooters and hangings.”

  To be as manipulative as Selma is, you have to be smart. The colors almost change in her eyes as she figures out what has happened. Her sugary smile never slips.

  “I told you,” I continue to nail the
coffin on her hopes. “I always take back what is mine. Once, twice and now three times, just as Travis said.” I have given Rhett his chance to come home wordlessly. He can simply just step back letting the line be decided upon, but he stands frozen with his thoughts or his doubts. Both might get him killed.

  We wait in complete silence for Rhett to make his decision. His hand trembles, flashing my mind back to the other times he let this little slip of emotion show. I can say all the words in the whole English language but they would never reach him. Selma’s poison has rotted away too much of him and my words do not have a strong enough antidote to heal his pain. This fight is for someone else to win.

  “Go to him,” I whisper to Aimes. “If you want him, prove it to him.”

  Aimes looks at me with the doubts clearly expressed on her face. Her feet begin to slowly slide forward. The weight of her fears are making them heavy to lift, but slowly she gains speed as she defeats her demons that whisper to her of failure.

  She slides up to Rhett, entwining the tall man with her arms and smiles. He straightens with the heat of her body looking to her with blue eyes fighting to keep their thoughts hidden. Rhett is hearing his own demons and they are shredding him as his belief in himself is being destroyed by the evil of Selma in front of him.

  Aimes gives him her best pixie smile. The warmth of it is contagious as it crawls up his body and onto his own face. “Throw the trash out, Rhett-stein,” she says.

  Rhett trails her small face with his fingertips, spreading his smile to the furthest corners of his lips. He tucks the smile away as he slips from the warmth of Aimes to take the arm of Selma. The two of them exit the room, but I have a feeling only one will be reentering. The most perfect couples aren’t always built around love, but those whose demons understand the other’s the best.

  “How did you know?” Aimes asks me as I come to stand beside her.

  “Sometimes,” I whisper to her. “they just need to be reminded where home is.”

  I can hear J.D.’s dark chuckle but it doesn’t scare me. J.D. was what he was, but without him, I would not be who I am. Like conjoined twins, we are responsible for each other the same way he has molded every man in this room in some way. They all have his strengths, his weaknesses, and his fears, but mostly they all just need to be reminded who to fight for just as he did. If I had learned that lesson sooner, could I have saved us all from him?

  “Now what?” Lawless asks, not as moved as I am by what just happened.

  “No clue. We let him change the sheets on his bed, I guess. I’m going to go check on Simon.” I tell the room with sincere worries over Simon’s mental state outweighing their needs.

  “Tell Dolph hello for me,” Lawless says, still wearing the scars from earlier.

  My annoyance with him bubbles up to feed my anger. “Don’t worry Larance, it’s hard to purchase white roses these days.” I let the feel of my words rest in his mouth and he frowns at me. I let it twist that smile of his into a deeper taste of anger. I hope the taste gets stuck in his throat. I hope the acidic bile gags him. I hope it gags him like the way the scent of roses gags me to this day.

  “You sure you want to go out wearing that?” Chapel calls from the back of the room where he has stood guard. I can hear how anxious he is over Aimes and I away from his side.

  I don’t look back to answer him. My answer is the slamming of the door leaving it all behind me. The subtle thing is completely over rated but the shrapnel is still just as sharp.

  CHAPTER 28

  Aimes and I travel the corrupted memory lane of the third floor. Flimsy ghosts float around us with their memories haunting us. Every corner, every tile, holds a corner of our mind we have fought to forget. It’s easy to see how the people are so twisted against us when they are stuck in this loop of remembrance. To them, it happened just yesterday and not over a month ago because they still live in the middle of it like a memorial.

  Simon’s “apartment” isn’t hard to find. People cross its open door with bowed heads and quicker steps than normal when they pass. Knocking, I cross through the threshold so many others fear. It’s kind of my thing. Bravely going where no smart person would go before. I’m like bad sci-fi without the T&A to promote it.

  I can still smell Shelia. Her perfume clings to the plaster haunting the room in it’s own way. It’s so real that I expect to see her come from behind the false wall someone put up to section off the classroom into a living room. She doesn’t, but Dolph does.

  “Dun dun duunn.” Aimes sings the classic song for trouble in my ear with his arrival.

  He doesn’t offer a greeting, a question, or an accusation as we stare at each other. Leave it to our resident smartass to break the deadlocked conversation.

  “I heard you two made out,” she says tilting her head with mock curiosity.

  “I heard we had sex,” Dolph replies with his eyes a shade so like my own bearing down on me.

  “Nah, you’re to cranky for the sex rumor,” Aimes says and I could hit her – with a bus.

  “I’ve heard Simon isn’t doing well.” I stop the train before it goes any further off track. As it is, there is sharp turn ahead and there is no telling how well the wheels will hold.

  “A lot of people talking about things they shouldn’t,” Dolph answers, still blocking the manmade entrance.

  I kick the door closed with my foot letting force slowly seal it. “You done?” I ask him with just the three of us now closed inside the room. I’ve had about all I can handle with male drama. Their egos are softer than fresh baked bread and are almost as much fun to tear apart.

  Dolph relaxes some once the door is closed. While our group has been managing our own fall out it seems there has been one up here as well. “Just tired,” he says trying to excuse his behavior towards us. “I’m tired of it all.”

  “Choir, man,” Aimes relaxes in one of the chairs arranged near us, “and the refrain is getting really old.”

  “How bad is it?” I follow Aimes’ lead and take the chair next to me.

  Dropping his guard, Dolph joins us and I see how weary he is. “Travis has them all riled up about the “end of days” and only those who are “devoted” will survive to see the world restored. Some are completely lost in his mess while some are over it.” He leans into the little sitting area lowering his voice as he shares his fears. “I’m not a leader. I never wanted to be. Richard and I, we came from another group before we found this place. I’ve seen what happens when no one knows who to trust. Once everyone starts turning on each other, there is no stopping it.”

  “…and that is exactly their goal.” Aimes shares the conclusion we have reached upstairs.

  She fills the gaps with what we have heard exhausting every avenue before Dolph finally caves. It doesn’t matter who we are, we all try to desperately believe the best of people. We hope to see in others what we can’t find in ourselves and we are always so bitterly disappointed when they show they are just as faltered as we are ourselves.

  “I haven’t told Simon any of it. He is barely even aware anymore. He lives in the past, constantly recalling things they did as a family or things we did as friends. Travis uses it as further proof of how dangerous times are now and how only the strong will survive.” Dolph lets his head hang low. This is not the man who met us at the gate with sharp words and watchful eyes. I don’t know who any of us are anymore.

  “How do we snap him out of it?” Aimes is twirling a strand of her white-blonde hair with her thoughts. It’s never a good sign.

  “You mean to snap him out of losing his wife, daughter and a good friend back-to-back?” Dolph asks putting the irritation back into his voice.

  “Exactly!” She smiles at him. Aimes is going to need more than just a little snip to back down. She’s slowly crawling her way back to her inner-self and her attitude is blooming again.

  “We have to get him out of this room. He’s surrounded himself with what he has lost and forgotten what he still has.” I sugge
st remembering how hard it was for me to walk down the hallway. I can’t even begin to understand the pain he must be feeling with it constantly pressed to his mind.

  “Where?” Dolph asks thinking about what I have said. We both know where the only place is for them both to escape and it just might be a different ring of hell.

  “There is only one place in here where Travis isn’t brave enough to visit and has no memories for Simon?” Aimes is asking if she’s thinking of the same place as I am without having to actually say it. She is. “Do you really think that is a good idea?”

  I arch my eyebrows with the question. “Why not?” I ask. I know why not, I just don’t care about the tiptoeing around egos and property anymore. Another boxing match might do them all some good. We are running out of bikes to drop or to find.

  “I agree with her. Do you really think that would be wise?” There is something hopeful in Dolph’s eyes when he asks me his question, something that stirs my heart just a little too well.

  “You scared?” I ask him. Whenever you want a man to agree with you, doubt his manhood. It works like a charm and I wear it like a favorite bracelet.

  “No.” It’s one word but his body is filling in the rest of the sentence. He might not be scared, but he isn’t happy either. He walks with a new resolve as he leaves the chair. “I’ll meet you down there later.” He doesn’t ask for help and we don’t insult him by offering it. I’ve done enough damage. At least I have until the real fun begins.

  “What have you done now?” Aimes asks me as we leave the room.

  “If we are going to stop hiding then we have to start fighting.”

  “You really think Dolph and Simon are going to take up the banner of hell-no-we-won’t-go?”

  “You really think they have a choice?” I leave her silent as she thinks about my question.

  None of us have any choices left to us. If this is truly our home, then we are going to have to fight for it or we might as well run now and watch it burn as we abandon it. I don’t run well and I’m not just talking physically.