Return to Me (Breaking Free Book 2)

by Renee Fowler

  My eyes wander towards the front of the store just in time to see Gabe’s familiar silhouette disappearing through the sliding, automatic doors. Another familiar face is exiting at the exact same time.

  I’m not sure what it is about him that’s stuck with me for so long. He got in my face outside that gas station the day before my mom died, and then he touched my hair that time at the grocery store. I’ve had fans do far worse, but something tells me this man is no fan of mine.

  From inside the safety of Gabe’s Jeep, I watch him stride across the parking lot with a single bag in his hand. He could be anyone, but he looks so freaking familiar. It’s nagging at me. I feel like I should know him. Perhaps there’s a good reason he felt slighted that I didn’t remember him that day, but I’ve met so many new faces over the last five or so years. Maybe all that shit I took really did permanently fuck up my brain somehow too. I watch him toss the bag into the back of a black, utility van before climbing in the driver’s side door and pulling away.

  When Gabe returns a short while later, I ask if he noticed a familiar face as he was going into the store. Maybe someone we went to church with?

  “I don’t think so. Why?”

  I shrug. The whole thing sounds too crazy to explain, so I don’t bother to try. “Nevermind. You ready to go home?”

  ∞∞∞

  We spend some time over the next few weeks searching for a new home, something that might actually feel like a real home. A few times Becca watched Rose so we could take a tour. A few times Lilly came over to babysit. She doesn’t understand why we would ever want to leave this place. It’s just perfect in her opinion.

  Gina expresses a similar sentiment a few days before I’m due to depart. “I sure am gonna miss this kitchen,” she says, leaning forward to pipe a delicate line of frosting along the outer rim of the small cake. She’s stopped by a few times to use my spacious kitchen for bigger jobs, like the multi-tiered wedding cake she’s presently working on.

  “My new place will have a nice, big kitchen too,” I promise. I’m starting to think maybe we should just have something built, like I did with this house. I’m too picky. “That looks almost too pretty to eat,” I say, staring down at her work. I can bake decently, but the decorative flourishes and delicate frosting flowers Gina creates are unreal. “One day when I get married, you can make my cake.”

  “You’ll probably have some la-di-da celebrity chef from France or somewhere fly in to make it for you,” she says, teasingly.

  “Yeah right. Are celebrity chefs a thing?”

  “I dunno. You tell me, Miss Fancy Pants.”

  “Shut up,” I say, laughing. “How the hell are you even going to get this thing out of here?” I ask, eyeing the kitchen island covered in varying sized cakes that she plans to assemble later.

  “Very carefully. Shane will help me move it out to my van when he gets here.”

  An idea pops in my head, possibly a crazy one, but definitely no more crazy than some of the dumb shit I’ve done in the past. “We should open a bakery.”

  Gina laughs. “What?”

  “A bakery! With like wedding cakes, cupcakes, stuff like that.”

  “Are you joking?”

  “Why would I joke about this? I’ll need something to do when I’m done with this tour. Idle hands are the devil’s playthings, right? I can’t just sit around staring at the walls. I can bake, and you know how to do all this artistic decorative shit. We could make those fancy little gourmet cupcakes. You can ship those things all over the place.”

  “We could call it Gina and Trin’s cupcake express,” she jokes.

  “No way. My name would come first, or we could just put our names together.” I click the tips of my nails together for emphasis. “Trina’s cupcake express.”

  Gina gives me an amused smile, like she thinks this is all in jest.

  “I’m not kidding, Gina. We really could. We can call it... Sinful Indulgence.”

  “You’re being serious?”

  “Hell yeah I’m being serious. I’ve been trying to figure out what I’m going to do with myself. We wouldn’t even have to wait. We could start right away. I mean, I would have to hire someone to help you while I’m gone, but holy sh-” I hear Rose galloping down the hall. Before she can rush in and make a mess of Gina’s hard work, I swoop down to snatch her up into my arms.

  “I wanna bite,” Rose says, eying the cakes laid out on the counter.

  “I’ll make you something tasty later on when you get back from visiting your mommy, and you can help me decorate it too.” It’s probably best not to get her too hyped up with sugar before Gabe takes her to the hospital anyways. “What do you think, Rose. Should Gina and I open up a bakery and make yummy cupcakes?”

  “Yes!”

  “See, she thinks it’s a fabulous idea.”

  “What’s a fabulous idea?” Gabe asks, wandering past me on his way to the fridge to get a bottle of water.

  Gina squints one eye, applies a faint swoop of baby blue frosting, and stands upright. “Your girlfriend seems to think we’re going to open a bakery and sell fancy cupcakes.”

  “We are! Why the fu- heck wouldn’t we? What do you think, Gabe? Don’t you think we should open a bakery?”

  He leans in to kiss my forehead. “If opening a bakery makes you happy, then I think that’s exactly what you should do.”

  “You’re really being serious? Like for real serious?” Gina asks with an incredulous look upon her face.

  “Yes! I mean, I don’t know crap about running a business, but you do. You’ve got the brains, and I’ve got the cash to get it up and running. Plus I know people who would be willing to pay to have fancy cupcakes shipped in for stupid parties and things. This could really work.” I pause to run a hand over my midsection. “I’m going to get so fat working in a bakery.”

  “Hush.” Gabe gives my side a little pinch. “You mind watching her for a minute so I can go get changed out of my uniform?”

  “I don’t mind.” I bounce Rose up higher on my hip, walking back through the house with her to give Gina a chance to finish her work. “What did you do today?”

  She chatters happily close to my ear. I’m going to miss her while I’m gone. I’ve gotten so used to seeing her everyday, but my absence is only temporary I remind myself. Eventually I’ll be back for good, and I’m going to own a bakery. One day Gabe and I will get married. Maybe I’ll change my mind and we’ll have a baby of our own that looks a bit like both of us, or we could adopt, or just get a dog like we talked about. Perhaps I was only destined to be a stepmom, but it feels like the puzzle pieces of my life are finally starting to fall into place.

  Gabe wanders back downstairs in his usual out of uniform attire, jeans and a tshirt. He whisks Rose out of my arms, and gives me a little peck. “See you in a bit.”

  When I arrive back in the kitchen, Gina is just finishing up. “You better not be messing with me, Trin.”

  “Why would I mess with you? I’m going to call my assistant and have her start looking into all the legal mumbo jumbo of opening a business, but I’m dead serious. I really want to do this.” I hold out my finger, and Gina dots a small blob of icing that I promptly suck off.

  “Sinful Indulgence. That does kind of have a ring to it,” Gina says.

  “Of course it does. I’m the one who came up with it.”

  Gina’s smile is huge, but it slowly fades off. “How’s Leah doing?”

  “Better, but it’s going to be a bit before she gets to go home. I think she’s getting moved to a rehabilitation place next week.”

  “That’s a damn shame she has to go through all that.” Gina shakes her head, and slides a box lid over the smallest cake. “I’m lucky as hell I never hurt anyone back in the day. My dumbass could’ve killed someone.”

  Gina has never spelled out why she had court order AA meetings, but I can pretty well guess. “But you didn’t,” I point out. “And you’re better now.”

  “An alcohol
ic and an addict open up a bakery… That sounds like the start of a bad joke.”

  “We’re going to be too busy making tasty cupcakes to fall back into bad habits.”

  “Oh, I’m not falling back into a thing. You don’t have to worry about that.” Gina’s lips curl up into a pretty smile. “Will I have to call you Miss Sinclair when you’re my boss?”

  “I prefer Ms Sinclair, but no. You can just keep calling me Trin, because I’m not going to be your boss. I’m not qualified to boss anyone around. We’re going to be partners.”

  “Are you going to miss me?” I ask, snuggling up against Gabe later that night in bed.

  He traces over one of my eyebrows with his finger tip. “Like you wouldn’t believe.”

  “You better not find another girlfriend while I’m gone.”

  He gives a disbelieving laugh. “I’m driving down with Rose on Friday. I think I can control myself between now and then.”

  “What about when I go out on tour? I bet there’s going to be way longer stretches than that when we don’t see each other.”

  Gabe nudges me over in the bed. “When did you get so damn insecure? I’m not going anywhere, Trin. I love you.”

  “I love you too.”

  “If there’s one of us laying here that should probably be thinking crap like that, it would be me, but I don’t. I trust you.”

  I really do trust Gabe, and it’s stupid to hold him accountable for the crap every other guy I’ve ever been with has done. “I trust you too, but everything seems so perfect right now. It’s like I’m waiting for something to go wrong.”

  “I’m yours, and you’re mine.” Gabe slides his fingers between mine. He pulls my hands above my head, and leans over me. “We were made for each other. I was made for you, and you were made for me.”

  “Do you really believe that?”

  “Yeah, I do.”

  “I don’t know if I really buy into that soul mates stuff, but I know I never want to be with anyone else. You’re it for me, Gabe. My first and my last.”

  He gives me a radiant smile. “My first and my last. I like that.”

  “And I’m not going to do anything to fuck this up again.”

  “I know you won’t, and neither will I. Maybe you’re right. The whole soul mates thing is kind of bullshit. It makes it sound too easy, like it’s all mapped out, but it’s you and me that have to make it work. Trin, I’m willing to do what I need to do to keep this working. No matter how long you’re on the road for, I’m not going anywhere. I’m still yours, whether you’re laying in bed beside me, or across the country. No matter how many miles there are between us, that doesn’t change.”

  My chest feels tight and achy. I’m perilously close to crying like a little bitch. “I don’t know how the hell I ever walked away from you before. I don’t know what I was thinking.”

  “That was a long time ago, Trin. We were just kids.”

  “Well, it’s never going to happen again. Never ever. I’m so fucking sorry for the way I acted. It was bullshit.”

  “We both could’ve done things different, but there’s no point in holding on to all that. I’m not, and you shouldn’t either. As far as I’m concerned we started fresh the night you invited me in for hot chocolate.”

  “I didn’t even make you real hot chocolate either. It was the crappy powder kind out of a packet.”

  “It’s a good thing I’m not picky about hot chocolate then.”

  Gabe dips his head down to kiss me, and it’s sweeter than the best hot chocolate. His lips still feel just as perfect against mine as that night.

  He drags his hands down my arms, along my sides. I love the way he undresses me, how he tastes all the newly uncovered places as he goes. I love the press of his body on top of me, inside of me. I love him so much it almost hurts. It’s scary. I know how ruined I would be without him. I lived through it once, and I don’t ever want to experience that again.

  “Gabe, bite me.”

  “What?” he mumbles against my skin.

  “Like you did in the shower, remember?”

  He stops moving, and lifts his head to look down at me. “I don’t want to you hurt, Trin.”

  “You’re not going to hurt me.” I wrap my legs around him, pull him all the way inside me so he groans. God, I love that sound. “Stop being a pussy, and just do it.”

  Gabe laughs against my mouth. He nips at my chin, the soft spot beneath my jaw. I pull his mouth down to my neck, show him exactly where I want to feel his teeth. Thankfully he’s thinking a bit more rationally than me at the moment. He chooses a more private location, beneath my ear, closer to the back of my neck.

  “Harder. Harder. Harder,” I pant. My fingers twist in his hair as I hold him tight against me.

  He fucks me harder. He bites me harder. I come so hard, my toes curl and my foot cramps up. I can’t draw in a breath to make a noise besides a strangled hum. Gabe’s teeth are still on my skin when he swells inside me. The low, throaty sound he makes vibrates against my neck, travels all the way through me.

  He lifts his head, and brushes my hair aside. “Shit, Trin.” His lips are feather light against that tender spot. “Do you really like that?”

  “Sometimes.” I wrap my arms and legs around him, not ready to let him go yet. “Now I have something to remember you by until Friday.”

  “Am I that easy to forget?”

  I shake my head. After almost seven years, I never managed. For me, Gabe was the hardest thing in the world to forget.

  Chapter 32

  Trin

  Rose wanders over to see me off the next morning. I pick her up and straighten the leg of her pajamas. “I’m going to miss you, but we’ll see each other again before you know it. Maybe we can talk on the phone.”

  “I like to talk on the phone.”

  “Me too.”

  “Okay. Love you, Trin. Bye.” She starts to wiggle aggressively, wanting to be put down.

  “I love you too.” I say towards her back as she flies away on bare feet.

  “Did you tell her to say that?” I ask Gabe quietly.

  He frowns. “No, of course not.”

  “What the hell happened to me?” I blink rapidly, and pinch of the bridge of my nose. “I’m such a little bitch now.”

  “No you’re not, Trin.” He kisses my forehead, the tip of my nose, my lips. Lastly he sweeps my hair aside, and brushes his lips over that tender spot on my neck, making me shiver. “I’ll see you on Friday, but I’ll talk to you tonight. Love you.”

  “Love you too.”

  “Please be careful.”

  “I’m not going to do anything stupid, Gabe.”

  “That’s not what I’m talking about.”

  I can barely suppress an eyeroll. He still thinks Brent is the eyeball eater. “I’ll be careful,” I promise.

  This journey back to Nashville was something I’d been dreading for a while, and even though I already miss Gabe and Rose before I’ve pulled past my front gate, I’m kind of excited to get back to work. Who knows, maybe Sinsation won’t be my last album, but it will probably be my last for a while, and it will definately be my last working with Brent. I know he’s not the eyeball eater, but I still can’t trust him as much as I’d like.

  Maybe I’ll eventually do what Kane suggested all those months back and move to another label. No matter what I decide, the next time around I’m doing things on my own terms. No more stupid contracts I can barely remember signing, and no more greedy, cutthroat managers who don’t give a shit about me.

  Mia is already waiting for me when I get to my place in Nashville. Sweet, patient Mia, who kind of resembles my Heidi disguise, with her glasses and long, auburn hair. I haven’t seen her since my mother’s wake, although we’ve spoke on the phone a number of times.

  I’ve made her life hell in the past, back in the days on the road when I was either high, or trying not to be high. When I blamed her for my overbooked schedule, as if she had a single thing to do with
it. She takes orders from both Brent and me, and gets crap from both of us when things don’t go according to plan.

  “Are those new glasses?” I ask.

  “Mmm, maybe. I have a few pairs.”

  “I like that color on you,” I say, gesturing towards her sweater. “It makes your eyes pop.”

  “Thanks” Mia gives me a shy smile, and grabs for the pen tucked behind her ear. “I already have the kitchen stocked with all the usual.”

  “I have some company coming this weekend,” I start, then quickly shake my head. “But I can run out and get-”

  “I can do it. Just give me a list, or you can just tell me now. I’ll write it down.”

  I wave my hand. “Don’t worry about it.”

  “Brent wants to see you tonight. Dinner at his place, and tomorrow I’ll be around to pick you up around eight, but I can stay tonight if you need me to.”

  “You don’t have to stay, and I can drive myself in the morning. I remember how to get there.”

  Mia gives a nervous laugh. “The studio is already booked. It’s important you arrive on time, and I don’t mind driving you. It’s what I’m here for.”

  “What do you do when you’re not shuttling me around, and running errands?”

  “Huh?”

  “I mean, when you’re not working.”

  “Uh, well… I handle all of your social media, and fan inquiries, and Brent has me helping Kane out now too occasionally, but he’s not in town often.” Mia pauses to paw through her bag for a folder. “And here’s all the information I got about that business you want to open. There’s a few possible locations close to your hometown that look suitable.”

  I briefly flick through the neatly collated and bound pages. “Thank you, Mia. This is perfect. It’s exactly what I was needing.”

  “I can get more specific information, and set everything up for a tour if you’d like, after you’ve had a chance to glance through all that.”

  I set the folder aside. “But what do you do when you’re not working? What do you do for fun?”

  Mia shakes her head, looking utterly perplexed.