Fool, Stop Trippin'

by McKinney, Tina Brooks

  “Are you cold?”

  “No, I’m fine.”

  The waitress takes our drink orders and we get in line. Many of the people we pass have cups full of change on their tables. One guy has five cups of dollar coins.

  “Wow, I wonder how much he won.”

  “I’d be more interested in knowing how much he lost.”

  “Ain’t that the truth?” We lapse back into silence as we fill our plates. Normally, I don’t like buffet food because it’s never hot enough, but I am starving and cannot wait to get back to the table and dig in.

  From the look of Craig’s plate he is pretty hungry as well. It is piled high and if everyone else wasn’t taking as much or more food I would be embarrassed.

  When we sit down, I find the nerve to question Craig’s behavior. I put down my fork, giving him my full attention. “Why are you being so quiet?” I am hungry as hell, but my fear of losing Craig spurs me on. He acts as if he doesn’t hear me, so I repeat my question.

  “I know I’ve been a bitch, but are we okay?” My heart beat seems to pause as I wait for his response.

  “We’re okay, baby. I’m just thinking of ways to make this your most memorable weekend. I want everything to be perfect for you.”

  “Memorable? Baby, you are scaring me. All week long you’ve been short and I felt like I was bothering you most of the time when I called you.”

  “I’m sorry, baby. Trust me, you haven’t done anything wrong. I’ve been stressing, trying to stuff a seven-day vacation into two and a half days.”

  “Craig, I’m with you. That’s as good as it gets for me. I’m not impressed by anything else but being with you.” I pick up my fork, giving my food the attention it deserves. I believe his simple explanation and try to finish our meal in peace, despite the nagging worry worm in my gut.

  “So do you wanna hit the casino after dinner or do you want to take a drive?” Craig asks.

  “I’m down for whatever, baby. We can stay right here in the hotel if you’d like or take a drive. It’s on you, especially since you did all the driving to get here.”

  “Let’s take a drive. The casino will be open all night long and you can even come down after I go to bed if you want to.”

  “Oh, I wouldn’t feel good about coming down here again without you. I like to gamble, but I’d rather spend my uninterrupted time with you.”

  “You keep talking like that and we won’t be seeing any of the fine city or the casino.” He smiles for the first time in weeks. “I tell you what. We’ll take a short drive and hit the casino for an hour or two when we get back. After that, I’m sure we can find something to do in our suite. I believe they even have pay per view. How does that sound?”

  “Sounds like a plan to me!” I finish my plate while fighting the temptation to get a piece of cheesecake.

  “Get your cheesecake, woman, I know it’s killing you.” I am full and don’t want to have trouble sleeping, but I have a sweet tooth that won’t quit and he knows it. He tops his meal off with a cup of coffee while I sinfully eat my cake.

  After leaving money on the table for a tip, Craig ushers me out of the restaurant and to the car. He drives as if he knows exactly where he is going and I can’t help but wonder how many other ladies he’s brought to this same area. Unwilling to dwell in my prior misery, I remain quiet while I enjoy the scenery. I drift off to sleep even though we have been driving for less than fifteen minutes.

  “Black folks, feed ’em and they out like a light.” Craig’s voice rouses me from sleep and I punch him on the shoulder playfully as I wipe the corners of my mouth, praying for no moisture that would indicate that I was drooling as I slept. Looking around, I realize that we are parked in front of one of those wedding chapels you usually see in Las Vegas on the old Elvis movies. I turn to Craig, not sure what to make of this new development.

  “Now, don’t nut up on me. We’ve talked about this before. The bottom line is I’m tired of waiting. Are you down for doing this tonight?”

  “Stop playing. This ain’t even funny.”

  “Do I look like I’m laughing?”

  “You’re serious?”

  “As a heart attack, baby. Despite what you think, patience is not my long suit.”

  “I know what your long suit is.”

  “Hey, kill the jokes right now. Are you ready to do this? Life is not promised to us. One of us could die tomorrow; I don’t wanna waste another minute of my life without you as my lover and wife.”

  “Are you sure?”

  “I’ve never been so sure of anything in my entire life. We can do a big ceremony later on, but tonight I want to make love to you officially as my wife.”

  “But, Craig, there is so much to work out. The kids, where will we live…don’t you think we should talk about this more?”

  “If you love me, Leah, there is nothing else to talk about. We will work out those issues together.”

  “So what are you waiting on?” I was trying to sound seductive despite my nervousness.

  “You, just say the word.”

  “Yes.”

  Tears flow from our eyes and mingle together when he presses his face forward and gently kisses me on my eyelids. I cannot think of a more moving experience in my entire life. Not even the births of my children moved me as much as this very moment. My heart feels like it’s about to burst. I can’t get out of my seatbelt fast enough to run around to his side. Throwing my arms around his neck, I hold on so tight, I just don’t want to let go. Our kiss is passionate and long.

  He breaks the kiss. “We have to hurry, baby, they will be closing soon.” He doesn’t have to tell me twice. I practically drag him into the building. I can’t believe we are going to actually do this. I keep expecting to wake up at any moment, even as we are filling out the paperwork. But it isn’t a dream and less than fifteen minutes later, I am Mrs. Craig Simmons-Richmond.

  What surprises me most is the size of the diamond he places on my finger. Obviously, Craig has been planning this for some time. The diamond is quite large, set in yellow gold and surrounded by four smaller diamonds. I want to ask Craig how many karats it is but I think better of it. I don’t want him to think I’m either ungrateful or just plain old tacky.

  “How long have you been planning this, Mr. Richmond?”

  “Been thinking about it for some time, Mrs. Richmond, but I honestly didn’t plan on popping the question this weekend. I wanted to wait until we had more time to be together, but you lit a fire in me that would not go out until I made you mine. Plus, that ring was burning a hole in my pocket for weeks. Come on, I promised you some gambling before we consummate our marriage.”

  Being around people is the last thing I want. I am so excited. I want to call my mother and Sammie to share my good news. I know we will face some big adjustments as far as the children are concerned, but I am confident our love will see us through. The hardest part of any new marriage, when there are children involved, is getting the children to accept and feel comfortable with your mate. Since we are past that hurdle, I am sure they will adjust quickly to our new living arrangements.

  For a nanosecond, Kentee crosses my mind, but I quickly block that dark cloud before it douses my internal sunshine. This is Craig’s and my night and I claim it with gusto. There will be plenty of time during our ride home to work out the particulars. Until then, I just want to relax and enjoy my new husband. I steal a look at him and his grin is almost as big as mine. Ironically, just a few short hours ago I thought he was going to break up with me and now, we are married. I am so tickled, I start laughing so hard that tears leak from the corners of my eyes.

  “Hey, what’s so funny?”

  “I’m laughing at myself for being so stupid.”

  “Stupid? I don’t get it.” I continue to laugh because I feel plain silly for ever doubting this wonderful man sitting beside me.

  “The whole way up here, I was thinking that you were bringing me here for one last romp in the bed before breaki
ng up with me. You’ve been so distant the last few weeks. I thought you were tired of me and my emotional baggage.”

  Craig pulls the car over to the side of the road. “Are you serious?”

  I nod my head. The pain in his eyes is obvious.

  “I’m so sorry, sweetheart. I never meant for you to feel anything less than love from me. I’ll admit I was preoccupied with trying to make this a fantastic getaway. I didn’t mean to cause you pain.”

  “It’s okay now, baby.”

  “No. It’s not. Promise me that if you ever feel insecure, or if I appear to be acting an ass for no reason, call me on it. Can you do that for me, baby?” He lifts my hand from my lap and gently kisses my palm. “Can you?”

  “Yes, I can.”

  “Good. In order for us to survive, we have to communicate. So stop that holding-in stuff, especially if it causes you pain. If we don’t confront things head on, they will only fester.”

  People are slowing down their cars, peering into the windows. It was only a matter of time before a state trooper pulls up to see if we’re stranded or in need of assistance.

  “Uh, baby, do you think we can move so as not to get killed on the first day of the rest of our lives?”

  “Yeah, uh…my bad.” We both laugh as the tension in the car breaks.

  “Wow, for a minute, you sounded just like Malik.”

  “I know, right? He is starting to rub off on me.” Craig reaches out and grabs my hand, placing it in his lap. I try to caress his dick, but he shakes his head.

  “No, baby, you can’t do that unless you want to wind up in a ditch. I’m hot enough as it is.”

  “Later?”

  “Oh yeah, you can count on that.”

  Kentee

  “Hey, Ma, how are you doing?”

  “Oh shit!”

  “Huh? What kind of greeting is that for your only son?”

  “The only kind you deserve since the only time I hear from you is when you have Bebe’s kids with you. The answer is no. You will not drop those kids off with me today.”

  “Aw, Ma, they’re your grandkids, for Christ’s sake.”

  “And they are your kids, so deal with them.”

  “I am dealing with them. But I’m tapped out of ideas about how to entertain them.”

  “You’ve had them less than twenty-four hours and you’re burnt out? Here’s a novel idea. Stop trying to entertain them and be a father.”

  “I don’t know how to do that.”

  “You should have thought of that when you were making ’em.”

  “Could you just watch them for a little while? I have an errand to run and I can’t take them with me.”

  “Then I suggest you wait and make your little run after you drop those rug-rats back home ’cause they aren’t coming here.”

  “Why must you keep calling my children names? You act like you don’t even love them. Is that it? You don’t love your own grandchildren?”

  “So you say they’re my grandkids. I can remember when you and Leah first split up you told me that they weren’t yours, and now you want me to claim them. Make up your damn mind. Are they yours or not?”

  “Uh—”

  “Speak up, cat got your tongue?”

  She has me there. I’d told so many lies I forgot whom I’d told what to. I never doubted the paternity of my children, but I didn’t want Leah to come in and turn my family against me after the split. So I did what came naturally, I lied to protect my own ass.

  “Fine, Ma, but when my kids grow up and don’t know who you are, don’t act surprised.”

  “That mind shit might work on some of those hoochies you play with in the street, but it damn sure ain’t going to work on me.” She hangs up the phone before I can say anything else.

  “Shit!” Now what am I going to do? I can’t drop off the kids at my girlfriend’s house because I promised Leah I wouldn’t. I have every intention of keeping that promise, especially since my current girlfriend doesn’t know I have children and I plan to keep it that way.

  Wait. I promised I wouldn’t take the kids to my girlfriend’s house. I didn’t say anything about my friend’s house. Tarcia isn’t my girl anymore. She is just a friend with benefits. And since she already knows about the kids, I won’t have to lie to her. Slapping my hands together, I gather the kids, jump in the car and head over to Tarcia’s house before she can get out in the street with her freaky friends.

  “Daddy, we’re hungry,” Kayla whines.

  “What? Your momma didn’t feed you?”

  “She said we didn’t have time to eat because you were on the way.”

  “Damn.” Slamming my hand down on the steering wheel, I fight the urge to yell at Kayla. The noise startles Mya and she begins to whimper. Realizing things are going downhill fast, I know I have to act quickly before things spiral out of control.

  The yellow arches light up the sky like a beacon calling me in. Fast, cheap, and good. Everybody loves McDonald’s, even adults. Pulling into the drive-thru, I quickly place our orders. I decide against going inside ’cause I don’t want Mya to act a fool. She has come a long way with her eating habits, but she still does not tolerate strangers looking at her.

  While I wait for them to finish eating, I scheme on what I am going to say to Tarcia to convince her to watch the kids. I know she isn’t going to be happy about seeing them, but I am hopeful she will keep a civil tongue in her mouth, especially after the way she acted the last time I saw her. She damn near punched a hole in my back and scared the shit out of me. I am counting on the fact that she still holds a torch for me. Her scheming ass will probably use this favor to get me back in her bed. That’s a small price to pay for what I’m about to do.

  Tarcia answers the door on the second ring, looking like a deer caught in headlights. For a minute, I am scared that she is going to slam the door, but then her entire face lights up. I can tell she is happy to see me until she realizes I’m not alone.

  Her expression becomes an icy façade as she crosses her arms over her chest. She is flashing hot and cold at me as if she is waging an inner battle.

  “Hey, baby.” As I step in closer to grab a kiss, she turns her head so it lands on her cheek instead of her lips. Undaunted by her attitude, I continue working our way into her apartment. For a minute, she holds her ground and blocks my way, but ultimately she steps aside.

  “What are you doing here?”

  “I missed you. And, and…the children missed you.”

  “No, we didn’t,” Kayla says. I silence her with a look and she lowers her eyes.

  “We were in the neighborhood and thought we would stop by. Go sit down, kids.” Tarcia, with a scowl on her face, still has her arms folded. She isn’t making this as easy as I thought it was going to be.

  “So, how have you been? Can we sit down?” She doesn’t answer, but I act as if I’m not expecting her to and sit down anyway. The children sit right next to me, forcing Tarcia to sit on the loveseat. Kayla is sulking; Mya is gazing out the window. Malik turns the channel on the television, clearly ignoring us all.

  Tarcia snags a cigarette from the pack on the cocktail table. Normally, I would chastise her for smoking in front of my kids, but since I am about to beg for a favor, I don’t want to piss her off. Her eyes are burning so brightly, she could light her cigarette from within. Instead, she uses the lighter that is also on the table, blowing smoke in my direction. I can tell she is hot with me, but she’s going to have to get over it and quickly. I have shit to do and time is ticking.

  “Say, where is your cousin? Is she still staying here with you?”

  “You would know that if you came around more often, now wouldn’t you?”

  “Ouch, go for the jugular now, why don’t you.”

  “I’m just calling them like I see them. Last time I talked to you, a few weeks ago, you were on your way over here and I haven’t heard from you since.”

  “I’ve been out of town on a big project. It was at the last mi
nute.”

  “Oh, cut the shit, Kentee. You said you were on your way. What did they do? Call you right before you turned in my parking lot?”

  “Almost. I had to go home and pack and I knew you wouldn’t believe me, so I just didn’t call. I’m sorry, baby.” I can feel Kayla’s eyes burning a hole in my face. I am beginning to think that coming here wasn’t such a good idea, but I am committed. I have to get across town to pick up a package within the next half hour or I will be in some serious hot water with some very difficult people.

  “Tarcia, can you do me a favor?”

  “No.”

  “I haven’t even asked it yet.”

  “You don’t have to. I know your sorry ass. You want to leave your kids here while you go God knows where and with whom.”

  I glance at my kids to see if they heard her call me a “sorry ass,” but mercifully their eyes are glued to the set, except for Mya. It is bad enough their mother called me a “sorry ass;” I don’t need for them to hear Tarcia calling me that too. If I don’t correct that soon, before I know it they will be calling me “sorry ass” instead of Daddy.

  “I ain’t going with anyone. I gotta pick up a package for Lil’ John and they can’t go.”

  “You should have thought of that before you picked them up from their mother.”

  “I didn’t know it at the time. He called after I got them and their momma had already left the house. She won’t answer the phone and now I am stuck.”

  “Sounds like a personal problem to me.”

  “Come on, Tarcia, don’t be like that. You know I still owe Lil’ John for bailing me out of jail.”

  “Again, this sounds like a personal problem. Take ’em to your new girl’s house.”

  “Ah, babe, you know you are my only girl.”

  “I am? You could’ve fooled me. I ain’t seen or heard from your ass for close to a month and you say I’m your only girl? What, do I have idiot written on my forehead?”

  “How many times do I have to tell you, I’ve been working?”

  “So whatcha been doing with your dick? I know you’re dipping it somewhere because it damn sure ain’t been in my pussy.”