Never Forget You

by N L Ardwick

  “I have to go soon,” she told him. “Gurmeet will be back home later.”

  He looked disappointed.

  “Would you mind dropping me at the restaurant?” he asked. “It’s not far from here.”

  She agreed. She wished she could have gone on to the restaurant to spend more time with him. In the car, they barely spoke. When they reached the restaurant, he touched her hand.

  She felt a rush, a wave of emotion. It overwhelmed her.

  “That’s me then,” he interrupted the silence. “Sadly, I’ve got to go, see you on Monday.” He looked at her. His gaze settled on her lips. He wanted to kiss her, to trace his finger along the sweet outline where skin met mouth. After a few moments, he took control of himself, said goodbye and got out of the car, looking back as he entered the restaurant.

  Her mind was consumed by thoughts of him all the way home. His gaze made her melt, she wondered what it would have felt like if he had kissed her. When she looked in the mirror that night, instead of seeing her eyes which normally appeared sad and tired, there was sparkle which she had never seen before.

  Michael unlocked his front door. He was tired. He had been socialising all evening, getting to know other members of 12 Gosforth Park. It was important to always play the game and put on a show. Jasmine was already in bed. He stayed downstairs for an hour before he went up. His thoughts turned to Harpreet. He was immensely attracted to her. She was different form the others. He felt a connection. There was a deep sadness which he saw in her eyes. He recognised it, as it was the same sadness he saw in his own eyes.

  He thought about her long hair which flowed down her back, her mesmerising eyes and flawless olive skin. He went upstairs and slipped into bed next to Jasmine. She was breathing softly. She stirred and he pulled her close to him. He needed to put these thoughts out of his mind.

  But this was easier said than done. She was there again in the office the following day.

  “Did you get home alright?” he asked her when he had an opportunity. He did not want anyone else to see the way he looked at Harpreet. He had to keep everyone on side for his career. Even Sylvie. If she thought she had a chance with him, he would let her think it. Harpreet said she was going to the café at lunchtime again and asked if he would like to join her.

  “Is Amanthi going?” he asked.

  “I don’t know,” she replied. “I have not seen her today.”

  As Pete Simmons was not in, Harpreet took the opportunity to go to lunch early. Amanthi had had the same idea and was already in the café. She gave Harpreet a knowing smile when she walked in.

  “So what happened on Friday?” she asked.

  “What do you mean?” Harpreet was puzzled.

  “That Michael Daniels fancies you so much,” Amanthi laughed.

  Harpreet blushed. “No he doesn’t. Don’t be silly.”

  Just at that moment Michael walked in and came over to join them.

  Amantih stood up almost immediately and said she needed to go back to make some phone calls.

  “Was it something I said?” asked Michael.

  “Anyway, how are you, Harpreet? Tell me more about yourself. Where do you live?”

  Harpreet told him about the flat which she had rented and on the spur of the moment, she asked him if he would like to come over the following evening for dinner. Her face suddenly felt very hot. She was apprehensive. What if he thought she was too forward.

  “Yes I would love to,” he replied.

  Later on that evening, Harpreet wondered if she had done the right thing. She had never been alone with a man before, apart from Ajay who was her husband and Dave. She wondered what her parents would think, and Ajay. She reconciled herself with the thought that he was only a work colleague.

  Michael arrived promptly at the agreed time of 7pm the following evening. Gurmeet was with Ajay and she had gone home earlier and begun to prepare food for them. The flat was warm and inviting. She lit some candles in the lounge and laid the table just as there was a knock on the door.

  Michael was not in his work suit today. She had not seen him earlier as she had been out at court. He was wearing dark blue jeans and a T shirt and jacket. When he removed his jacket, she could not help but notice his muscular physique. He watched her as she prepared their food in the kitchen. He felt totally at ease with her. The conversation flowed between them as they sat at the table to eat.

  “So how is your mum now?” Harpreet asked.

  He looked puzzled and then remembered that he had told her that he was living with her.

  “Oh, she’s fine, fine, hip is on the mend. I think I will be staying with her a while longer.”

  He did not want to lie to her. He had no choice.

  After dinner, they sat by the electric fire in the living room. They were silent for a while.

  “The other night when I dropped you at the restaurant, you looked as though you were going to kiss me.” she said.

  Michael left his seat and walked over to her and sat down on the settee near her. She was now sitting on the floor with her back leaning against the settee near to him. He moved again and sat down next to her on the floor.

  “Can I kiss you now?” he asked.

  She did not say anything but leaned towards him.

  Michael undid her hair which was tied up in a bun and gently pulled it down so that it framed her face.

  “You look just as beautiful now with all your make up gone,” he whispered. He held her face up with both hands and kissed her on the lips, gently and softly. The touch of his lips made her feel warm and she felt a tingling sensation, a rush throughout her body. Michael pulled away and looked into her eyes and smiled. He then put his arm around her and held her close to him.

  After he was gone, she felt dazed, unable to make any sense of the emotions which she had felt today.

  CHAPTER 12

  The following morning, when Harpreet woke, she remembered what had happened the evening before. It did not seem real. She got ready for work with a renewed enthusiasm. She could not wait to see him again. He was in the reception area when she arrived at work, talking to Sylvie. When she walked past, he followed her up to her room, making an excuse that he needed to discuss a case with her. Even though Pete Simmons was in the room next door, Michael closed the door to her office and pulled her close to him, kissing her again. He told her he would see her at the end of the day.

  Just as he reached his office, he received a telephone call from Jasmine. He was an immensely private person. No body in the office knew about his family life. He stepped outside to take the call. Jasmine sounded anxious.

  “Michael, it’s Lucy. The school called to say she has been sick and could we collect her. Are you able to go? I’m not feeling great myself today.”

  He had noticed that Jasmine had not looked herself this morning.

  “Yes, it’s fine love. Don’t worry. I will sort something out.”

  Michael told Edward Jones that his mother had been taken ill and he had to go. Then he remembered Harpreet. He called her and told her the same thing. She sounded very concerned and he felt guilty again for lying. He had already reached the point where he could not do without her. He also needed Jasmine. She had given him the family he had never had. He felt as though he belonged somewhere at last. But he did not feel this intensity of emotion for Jasmine. He could not open up to her. She would never understand the rejection he suffered as a child. But how could she understand if he had never told her? She had tried to raise the subject of his parents, but he ended up getting angry and she knew not to push him.

  From then on, he took every opportunity to see Harpreet, sometimes stolen moments in the office or the short time when he would walk her to her car every day. Other people at the firm had begun to notice. Harpreet noticed a change in Edward Jones’s behaviour towards her. He thought very highly of Michael and did not want him to be distracted.

  “So, how is it going?” Amanthi asked her one lunchtime. “Gosh if I ever had a
boyfriend, never mind someone from a different culture my parents would kill me.”

  Although Amanthi said this jokingly, Harpreet knew this was all too true. She could never have a relationship out in the open with Michael, she could not tell her family about him and she could not introduce him to Gurmeet for fear that Ajay would find out. It was so unfair because she wanted to tell the world how she felt. The wedding would be the only place where she would not know anyone and they could behave like a normal couple.

  “Amanthi, would you mind if I bought Michael to the wedding?” she asked.

  Amanthi looked hesitant, but then told her it would be fine.

  The day of Amanthi’s wedding was upon them before they knew it. Amanthi had already left work a week before and after the wedding she would leave for Canada. She would miss her friend and as Michael would be leaving soon to go to 12 Gosforth Park, she would be lonely. She was wearing a pale blue sari and had curled her long hair The long dark locks of hair hung loose down her back. In her ears, she wore her grandmother’s earrings. Gurmeet had gone on a school trip and Ajay would collect him when he returned.

  Michael came to collect her to go to the wedding. He looked immaculate in his Navy blue Armani suit. He wore a purple tie and had a matching handkerchief in his suit pocket. He gasped when he saw her. He was mesmerised by her beauty. Once inside the flat, he lifted her up into his arms and kissed her.

  The wedding venue was a five star hotel in the City. No expense had been spared. Amanthi wore an ivory floor length gown. Her hair was adorned with jewels. She was beaming. Harpreet spoke to her briefly as she was surrounded by well wishers and then took her place next to Michael for the wedding meal. She noticed the disapproving glances of some of the elderly guests as she was sitting close to a man who was not from her culture.

  After the reception, Michael ordered a taxi and they both went to the flat. She rested her head on his shoulder. She did not know what she would ever do without him. He kissed her gently on her head and once at the flat, he went inside with her. They stood quietly for a while and then he moved towards her and kissed her gently on her mouth and then on her neck. She longed for him now. She undid the buttons on his shirt and ran her fingers down his chest. She loved his cocoa brown skin which felt like velvet to touch.

  He was kissing her more passionately now. His hands moved over her body and he undid the buttons of her blouse. His breathing had deepened as he became more aroused. The sensation of his touch prickled the skin all over her body.

  CHAPTER 13

  As the early morning light crept in through the curtains in the morning, Michael looked down at Harpreet. She now lay with her head on his shoulder, her wrist full of blue and white bangles lay across his chest and her long flowing curls were spread on the pillow next to him. He smiled to himself. He felt happy. Looking at his watch now, on the bedside table, he saw that it was eight o clock. It was Saturday so he did not need to take Lucy to school. He thought about Jasmine. She was looking under the weather again yesterday when he left, telling her he was going on a residential course and would have to stay overnight.

  Harpreet stirred and opened her eyes.

  “Morning,” she smiled. “Are you alright? Shall I make breakfast?”

  “No, not yet,” he replied. “Just lie with me for a while. Talk to me.”

  They lay in silence for a while and then he said. “There is something bothering you. I saw it from the first time I saw you. There is a sadness, a weariness. What is it? Tell me.”

  She turned her back to him now. Tears slipped through her eyelids and fell onto the pillow. He put his arm around her and then he pulled her back round again and saw that she was crying.

  “Hey, I didn’t mean to upset you. I’m sorry.”

  “No, its ok. I will tell you. Something happened. I still find it hard to talk to anyone about it. I am seeing a counsellor. She is the only person I have spoken to about it properly.”

  He looked concerned now

  “What is it? You can tell me.”

  “It’s Amy. My little baby girl, Amy. She died shortly after she was born. She was perfect Michael. Just perfect. The pain will not go away. I will never forget her. I feel this knot of pain in my stomach.”

  She told him that her marriage was not strong enough to take what had happened and that Ajay had left her.

  “You don’t know how much meeting you has helped me. I feel wanted after so long. I don’t want to hurt any more.” Tears filled his eyes and he fought to hold them back. He knew all to well about loss.

  “I will never hurt you.” he said. In his heart, he convinced himself that this was true.

  He held her for a while and then she got up and made breakfast.

  “What would you like to do today?” she asked him.

  Michael did no make any eye contact with her and replied.

  “Sorry baby, I have to run some errands for my mother. I promised her.”

  “Do you want me to come with you.? Gurmeet is not back until tomorrow. I don’t mind.”

  “No, no, it’s fine. My mother is abit grumpy at the moment. Doesn’t really want any visitors.”

  She nodded to confirm that she understood. He left shortly after midday. She did not mind being alone again. She felt content. She would have plenty of time to see him when his mother was feeling better.

  Michael opened the front door of his home. He could not hear anything. Usually, Jasmine was moving around in the house, busy doing her Saturday chores. There was no sign of Lucy either. He went upstairs immediately. Jasmine was lying in bed. He panicked.

  “Jasmine, what’s wrong?”

  She looked so relieved to see him and held out her arms so that he would hold her.

  “I didn’t want to disturb you on your course. I know how important it is to you. I was really sick last night and my mum had to take Lucy. Will you go and get her?”

  Michael felt sick. Jasmine had needed him and he was not there for her or Lucy. He did not like letting them down. But what could he do? He could not live without Harpreet any more. He needed her.

  “We need to get you to see a doctor first thing on Monday. You’ve probably got some bug.” he said firmly. She nodded, just happy that he was there.

  On Monday morning, he took her to see the doctor and waited for her outside. His phone rang. It was Harpreet. He told her that he would try to come over that evening or the following evening. He did not want to commit to anything in case Jasmine was still unwell. Hopefully, the doctor would give her something and she would be feeling better by this evening.

  Jasmine came out of the surgery to speak to him. She got in the car. She looked pale.

  “What’s up?” he asked. “What did the doctor say?”

  “He thinks I might be pregnant. He said either they can do the test here or I can go to the chemist.”

  “But how could you be pregnant? We have been careful.”

  She looked at him worried at his reaction. His heart was in his mouth. This was not meant to happen. Not now.

  “Sorry, J, I am just abit shocked I am sure you are too. Do the test here. We need to know for sure.”

  Jasmine got out of the car and went into the surgery. He decided to go after her and wait in the waiting room. She returned twenty minutes later.

  “It’s positive Michael. We are going to have a baby.”

  He immediately stood up and hugged her. He would never let her down. He dropped her home and told her he would be back quite late that evening. Paul was coming home for a few days and he knew that Jasmine and Lucy would be fine as he would arrive by six o clock.

  He arrived at work just after lunchtime. He only had a few days left at the firm. His mind was racing, trying to process the news that he was to be a father again. Even if he was not seeing Harpreet, he needed to concentrate on his career. He looked for Harpreet but she was not in. He asked Sylive where everyone was, not mentioning Harpreet.

  “Most people are in, except Richard and Harpreet who
are both at court.”

  He noticed her searching his face for a reaction when she mentioned Harpreet’s name. Michael was very good at hiding his feelings and was about to go to his office, when Sylvie blurted out.

  “So what’s going on between you and Harp. Everyone is talking about the way she looks at you. I don’t think she is all that personally.”

  Michael was angry but he did not respond apart from saying that he had an urgent call to make. He could not afford to confirm that he was having a relationship with Harpreet. He needed to keep everyone on side for his career.

  He did not see Harpreet until later on that afternoon and did not say anything other than he would see her later in the evening but he was not able to stay over again.

  CHAPTER 14

  He arrived at hers just after seven. Harpreet had had an appointment with Julia but she cancelled so that she could go home earlier. And anyway, she was feeling better now. Gurmeet had stayed at this father’s. He was doing this more and more now.. They had dinner together and sat down in the living room. Michael was tired. He mused over whether he should tell her about what had happened to him. He was about to tell her when she had told him about Amy but he could not. He had not told anyone. And this is how he remained in control.

  But he was feeling vulnerable today and blown away by the news that he was going to be a father again.

  “Harpreet, I need to tell you something about me. Well about what happened to me. You see, I saw in your eyes from the day I first met you, what I see in mine. Pain and sadness.”

  He went on to tell her about his mother and that he did not live with her. She was dead. He told her that he had tried so hard to win his mother’s love. However, his mother could not for her own reasons give him love or protection.

  “I tried so hard, Harp to make her love me. I loved her you see and I wanted to make her love me back.”

  He looked up at her now, his eyes were shining with held back tears. He looked like a little boy.