Deceived
Page 18
“Cheryl,” Dave said, the word sounding like a warning more than anything else.
Cade’s mother took a step toward him, her lips peeled back in a snarl. “I am not your mother. I’m Paxton’s mother. I’m Evan’s mother. But not yours.”
Cade held his arms out wide. “This looks a lot worse than it is,” he countered. “So what? You’re not even interested in hearing what I have to say? You’re disowning me?”
She pointed at him. “How can I disown a child who was never mine to begin with?” She turned and glared at Dave.
Pax had been glowering at Cade, but now his look had softened. He turned to look at me as Cade stood motionless in front of his mother. Their father slammed his fist on the table. “That’s enough, Cheryl.”
Pax quickly stood and walked around the dining room table. He took me by the elbow. “Come on, Seren, walk outside with me.”
More than happy to escape, I quickly rose and followed him. Evan did the same.
We walked out to the porch, and I sat beside Pax on a brown wicker loveseat while Evan sat in a chair angled toward us.
Evan intertwined his fingers and cupped the back of his head with his palms, his elbows spreading outward. “Well, no one can say the Mayfields aren’t entertaining.”
Pax and I remained silent, the awkwardness of the situation so thick, I felt as if my throat were clogging.
“What the hell is Mom even talking about?” Evan asked.
Pax drew his brows down into angry slashes. “That prick never said one word to me about it being Jessica that he knocked up,” he growled, totally ignoring Evan’s question.
I briefly considered taking up for Cade until I realized that the only thing I knew was what Cade had told me and judging by the current situation, I had serious doubts about whether anything he said was true.
I really wanted to get him alone. Questions swirled in my head, and I wanted to pose each and every one to him and watch his face while he answered, hoping that something in his expression would clue me in on whether he was lying or telling the truth.
“Didn’t I tell you?” Pax asked.
I turned toward him. “Tell me what?”
“That I was the better man.”
“Shut the hell up, Pax,” Evan spouted.
Pax clamped his jaw shut and looked out over the front lawn. In that moment of silence, I could hear his mother’s muffled yells through the window behind me. Pax stood abruptly and went in the house, leaving Evan and me looking at each other as we wondered what he was going to do.
Nervously, I stood and walked to the end of the driveway, followed by Evan. I felt like an intruder, and I no longer wanted to be there.
“Do you want me to take you home?” Evan asked.
I considered his offer. Part of me wanted to accept. “Maybe I should wait on Cade.” I still needed answers from him, but since chaos had let loose, I wasn’t sure if now would be a good time to ask them.
Evan dipped his hands into his pockets and nodded slowly, and it amazed me just how much he and his brothers resembled each other. When we were in high school, I’d seen teachers take one look at Evan and ask him if he was a Mayfield.
The front door opened, and Cade barreled out.
“Last chance,” Evan said as he watched his brother take long strides down the sidewalk while carrying some sort of box.
Pax came out right behind him. “Cade!”
Cade stopped immediately and turned toward him. “I guess you’re loving every minute of this,” Cade snapped, and I was shocked by the anger and hurt in his voice.
Pax pointed at him. “That’s where you’re wrong. If that were the case, I would’ve told you a long time ago.”
“You knew?” Cade asked, clearly shocked as he stood frozen on the sidewalk, waiting for his brother to answer.
Pax took a deep breath, standing akimbo as he stared at the ground before raising his line of vision to his brother’s face. “Yeah, I knew.”
Cade took two steps toward him. “And you never told me?”
Pax pressed his lips into a thin line. “You didn’t exactly tell me about this shit with Jessica, but for your sake, I’m going to put that aside for a minute.” He let out a heavy sigh. “I know we have our differences, and you irritate the shit out of me sometimes. But is it so hard to believe that I might have kept that to myself because I didn’t want you to feel like this?” He motioned toward Cade.
“Yeah, it is,” Cade thundered.
“Well, it’s true. I didn’t tell you because it wasn’t my place, because I knew it would hurt you, that it would make you feel different, but damn it, Cade, it changes nothing between us.”
“Everything has changed, Pax. Don’t you see that? Everything has changed.”
Pax shifted his stance. “Not between us. You’re still my brother.”
“What’s going on?” Evan asked.
Cade turned toward us and strode down the sidewalk. “Ask him.” Cade thumbed toward Pax, who had remained still. “Hell, for all I know, you may already know, too.”
A questioning look settled on Evan’s face as his gaze toggled between his brothers.
Cade walked past me. “Come on, Flanagan. Let’s get the hell out of here.”
After a good five minutes in the car, he still hadn’t spoken to me. Obviously something else was going on besides Jessica’s appearance, but since I wasn’t exactly sure what, it was difficult for me to concentrate on anything besides the fact that Jessica had not only named Cade as her child’s father, but also her fiancé.
And despite whatever else was happening, I couldn’t get past those facts.
“Why did you tell me that he wasn’t your child?” I asked, treading carefully since Cade seemed to be in a volatile state of mind.
“Because he’s not.”
“Then why did Jessica just announce to your whole family that he is?”
Cade exhaled and ran his fingers through his dark hair. “I don’t know.”
“So am I to assume that you also don’t know why she announced that the two of you are getting married?”
He remained silent as he gripped the steering wheel.
“Did you propose to her?”
“We’ve talked about marriage….”
“You have?” I asked, trying desperately not to feel devastated.
“Yes, we have, but it was before you came back to town. We had talked about marriage as an option, but we had agreed to wait until after the baby was born to discuss it further. I had told her that if we did get married, I would claim the baby as my own, which is why I was trying to be discreet. I had no commitment to marry her, Flanagan. In fact, I was still hoping that after the baby was born, she would agree to talk to Pax.
“As far as I’m concerned, none of it matters now, anyway. After Ireland, I told her that I would still help her, but that things had changed for me.”
“If you told her that, why did she show up at your parents’ house today claiming that the two of you were getting married?”
“I can’t do this right now,” he said, stopping at a red light.
“You can’t do what? Talk to me? Tell me the truth?”
He slammed his hands on the steering wheel. “Damn it, I did tell you the truth.”
“It sure as hell doesn’t feel like it,” I countered, remembering Jessica’s words. “Did you know that she was at the park that day?”
“What are you talking about?”
“The day you took me to the park to talk to me…she came up and sat beside me as soon as you left, but she never introduced herself. She asked me if I was having trouble with my boyfriend.”
“Jessica was at the park?”
“Yes.”
“Are you sure?”
“I’m positive. I played with your baby while his mother sat right beside me.”
He squealed his tires as he took off when the light turned green. “I told you that he isn’t my child,” he ground out between clenched teeth.
“Then why did she just tell your parents that he was?” I asked, irritated at the prospect of him lying to me. “You know how I feel about being deceived.” I wanted to trust him, but Jessica had filled my thoughts with so much doubt, and I was afraid that my attraction to him would blind me to the truth.
Cade sighed. “Are you saying you don’t believe me?”
“If you were me, would you believe it?” I asked softly.
The muscle in his jaw ticked as he stared straight ahead. “This is one hell of a birthday,” he muttered. “It’s bad enough all the other women in my life have gone batshit crazy, but you, too, Flanagan?”
My anger flared. I needed him to reassure me, and he insulted me, instead. “You’re calling me batshit crazy? You? The same guy who expects me to believe that a woman had gotten pregnant with someone else’s child, but you were more than happy to let people believe it was yours because you were going to be responsible for it. The two of you talked about getting married! Then you tell me that you had a conversation with her and let her know that you wanted a relationship with me. Then that same woman shows up the same day that you told me that everything had been straightened out and announces to your parents that they now have a grandchild that they might want to meet before the two of you are married. Did I leave anything out? And yet, I’m the one that’s batshit crazy?”
His jaw continued to tick.
“Oh, wait,” I said, “I guess if I bought this ridiculous story you’ve been selling me all this time, then I am batshit crazy. Maybe Pax is right. Maybe he is the better man.”
Cade slammed on the breaks, and my heart pounded as he grabbed my wrist. “If you truly believe that Pax is the better man for you, then don’t let me stand in the way. I’m going to drop you off at your house, and you can hop in your car and go get him.”
“You’re hurting me,” I whispered as I locked eyes with him, wishing I could take back my comment about Pax.
He relaxed his grip, and a look of remorse settled on his features. He pulled in a ragged breath, his chest heaving. “I’m sorry, Flanagan.”
He released my wrist, and I wrapped my fingers around it, gently massaging.
A moment later, he pulled into my driveway. I sat quietly a moment, hoping that he would say something, that he would somehow make me feel better about this entire situation, but he remained quiet.
“If you’re with Jessica, tell me now,” I said quietly, unable to keep the defeat from my voice.
Cade turned his cold green eyes on me. “I refuse to repeat myself like some kind of a damn parrot.”
His words stung. I wanted to understand, but nothing was adding up. Frustrated, I blurted, “Then I guess this is it.”
“I guess it is.”
I stepped out of the car and watched him as he backed out and sped away.
We had just had our first barney, Irish slang for an argument.
And judging by the way things were going, it could very well be our last one, too.
Chapter 19
Steever
Cade
“You need a…what’s that word Seren was telling us?” Pax asked. “Oh, that’s right…steever…some kind of Irish code for a swift kick in the ass.”
I was sullen as I stood in front of my brother’s desk, giving him a go-to-hell look. The last thing I needed to top off my shitty week was his smartass comments. I had come to talk to him about Jessica. In doing so, I had prepared myself for war. Women had been the downfall of our once-close relationship, Jessica in particular.
“So what’s the deal?” he asked, leaning back in his office chair. “You’ve been banging Jessica and when she wound up pregnant, you decided to drop her and go after Seren, instead?”
I stood akimbo, clamping my mouth shut before I said something that would be counterproductive. I had to remember my end goal, which was to clean this mess up so I could straighten things out with Flanagan.
I could feel my veins throbbing at my temples. “I haven’t been banging Jessica.”
“So it was a virgin birth? Quick, call the Enquirer.”
Rotating my head to release some of my tension, I did my best to ignore his comment.
“Why are you here, Cade?”
“I thought you said you were still my brother,” I spat out between clenched teeth.
Pax sprang up, leaning over the desk as his office chair flew backward across the plastic mat. “I did, but damn it, that doesn’t mean I’m not still pissed about you and Jessica. It was bad enough that you screwed up my chances with Seren, but you did that knowing that Jessica had just had your baby? One woman isn’t enough for you? Let me guess…you want Rachel for yourself, too. A regular harem?”
“If you’d shut your damn mouth for more than two seconds and listen….”
“I’ve heard so much already that I can barely stand the sight of you.” His biceps strained against the sleeve of his shirt, and I imagined that we were both tense, both ready to come to blows if one of us pushed the other over the edge.
I sprawled my hands over his desk and leaned toward him. “I told you that I’m not with Jessica. Not now. Not ever.”
Pax shoved me, sending me stumbling back before I righted myself. “Did it hurt?” he snarled.
“Did what hurt?”
“When you fell in that pile of shit you’re trying to feed me.”
“I’ve never been with her, Pax. As far as she’s concerned, you’re the only Mayfield she ever really wanted. I was nothing but a friend who had offered to help her.”
A harsh laugh of disbelief erupted from him. “A friend who offered help? Is that what you want me to believe? You were going to help her by marrying her?”
“I tried to tell her to come to you,” I reasoned.
“It wouldn’t do her any good to come to me.”
I stepped forward again. “And that’s exactly what she said.” I pointed at him. “She was in love with you, and you drove her away.”
“She claimed to love me and then she turned around and had sex with my brother. She’s dead to me.” He pointed at me. “You’re damn lucky that I don’t consider you dead, too.”
I closed my eyes and exhaled. How many times did I have to go through this with him? I looked at him. “I never had sex with her. I did kiss her all those years ago, and it was a mistake, one that I’ve apologized for repeatedly. She was heartbroken because you had just dumped her.”
“I did it for her own good!”
“Don’t you get it?” I asked, exasperated. “It wasn’t for her own good. She was miserable without you.”
“Well, you didn’t mind stepping in to take my place.”
“You’re right, you asshole. I would have stepped in and took your place, but she didn’t want me. She wanted you. Fast forward six years, and she still wants you, but you made it pretty damn clear that you were through with her. She had a one night stand and got pregnant, Pax. The father’s not in the picture. I begged her to talk to you, but she was terrified of being rejected by you again. She said you never wanted kids of your own, and she knew you sure wouldn’t want her if she was pregnant with someone else’s child.”
“So you swooped in and offered to marry her? How very gallant of you.”
“Don’t you ever think about having kids, Pax? A son to play ball with? A daughter with long hair and pink dresses, who smiles at you like you’re her favorite person in the entire world?”
“I wouldn’t be the father of her child. And if what you’re telling me is true…you wouldn’t be the father of her child, either.”
“So the child would be an outcast like me? Is that it?”
He took in a deep breath. “Hell, Cade, I wasn’t talking about you.”
“But it’s the same damn difference, isn’t it? My mother isn’t really my mother.” I laughed bitterly. “At least now I know why I always felt like the odd man out, like my parents loved me a whole hell of a lot less than my brothers. At least now things make sense.”
“We�
��re talking about two totally different things.” His voice had lost some of its menace.
“I want kids, Pax. When Jessica told me what had happened, yeah, we talked about marriage. You know she’s a good person, and I didn’t have any other prospects. I could do a whole hell of a lot worse than her, and I would have taken that child and loved him as my own. And after the bomb that’s just been dropped on me about my own parentage…I don’t know. Hell, maybe I would be just like my parents. Maybe I wouldn’t be able to love him as my own. It doesn’t really matter now, but Jessica was dragging her feet before Flanagan even came into the picture. And you know what I think the reason is?”
“What’s that?”
“You. She’s still in love with you. Somewhere deep inside her, she’s still hoping that somehow it will be you who rescues her.”
“She doesn’t need rescuing. Women raise children by themselves all the time.”
“But it’s not easy. No one wants to feel alone in the world. And when it comes to Jessica, she still wants you.”
“That explains why she crashed your birthday dinner to tell Mom and Dad that you were the father of her baby.”
I groaned. “Shit, I don’t know why she did that. I have no idea what’s going through her head. I’ve been trying to call her, and she won’t answer the phone. I had just talked to her the day before and explained to her that I would still help her, but Flanagan was my priority. I didn’t plan it, and who knows? If you hadn’t ran off to Ireland with Flanagan, forcing my jealousy to kick in, I could very well be married to Jessica right now. And that would have been a huge mistake. I should thank you for that much at least.
“The only thing I can conclude is that Jessica got scared. I’m the only person she’s got, Pax, and she knew things were getting serious between Flanagan and me. Maybe her appearance was a desperate last-ditch effort. Whether it was a last-ditch effort to marry me or a last-ditch effort to get your attention, I don’t know.”
Pax rubbed his jaw. “So why are you telling me all this?”
“I want you to talk to Jessica.”
“Hell, no.”
“I saw your face yesterday when she walked in the room. I know you still love her.”