Beautifully Toxic (Toxic Love #1)

by L. M. Roberts

  “You all right, lady?”

  I glance up from snapping my gloves on and see the man in my chair staring down at me with worry in his eyes. I smile lightly and nod my head, offering him nothing more in return. I pick up the gun, buzz it a few times in the ink I’ve placed on the table, and then lean over and stretch the skin between my fingers just as Pierce’s voice calls out next to me.

  “Sin, do you have a minute?”

  “No,” I respond through clenched teeth.

  The only thing I want to do to that man is give him a main course of throat punching and a side of busted balls. He just didn’t get that everything he did to me that night had a lasting effect. It was like a flashback to when I was sixteen all over again.

  “Please.” I could hear the pleading in his voice, and I will admit it almost made me break.

  I roll my eyes and glance back up at the man staring down at me with a polite smile. “Do you mind?” I say, gesturing between Alex and myself.

  He gives me a kind smile and urges me to go on and take care of him. I always like people like him. They’re here to get an awesome tattoo by someone who knows what she’s doing, but willing to accommodate me when necessary.

  I stand up and, with a snap, my gloves come off. I begin making my way to the back of the tattoo parlor and walk through the office door, waiting for Alex to pass me. I know that bringing him in here was asking for trouble, but it wasn’t like I could fuck him up with the shop full of people. First of all, I could lose my job if I did that. James would definitely understand, but there was only so much that even he could take. Two, I didn’t want to touch even a single part of him. The second time had been two times too many. I wasn’t like all these other women around here—the ones who kept coming back for more even though they got fucked over more times than they could count.

  No, I believed if you fucked me over once, shame on you. If you fuck me over twice, you better be glad that you walked away without a limp. Well, in Alex’s case, he had been limping, but that’s beside the point.

  “What is it?” I frown, crossing my arms over my chest.

  I see that his hands are on his hips, and he’s pacing like a mad man. I take in the wrinkled clothing, stubble lining his jaw, and his mussed up hair—all of which look like they’ve seen better days. In a word, he looked like shit. I’d feel sorry for him if I didn’t know what caused his unkempt appearance in the first place.

  “I need to explain…” He paused as his pacing took on a borderline crazy speed. “Sin, you just don’t know. Dammit, why is this so fucking hard?!” he yells. “I’m the person I am today because I have set rules and schedules I go by.”

  All I hear is… Blah, blah, blah… I’m a cocksucker… Blah, blah, blah… I’m a douche. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

  “And I’m the person I am today because I didn’t make excuses for myself,” I shoot back. “I don’t give a shit what you do, but keep me out of it.”

  I start for the door, but he gets to it before I do. “Sin just fucking listen to me, okay? Shitfire.”

  I don’t have to stand there and listen to his excuses, but I do want to know what was going through his mind when he did that. Call me stupid, but I’m intrigued by what has him in such a fit. I’ve only ever seen Alex be calm and collected, so seeing him look like his entire world was about to fall apart was kind of comical. I wanted to laugh so freaking bad.

  “What is it, Douche?”

  I see his jaw tick at that, and I know I am running on a short leash at the moment. If anything, Alex was really exercising self-control right now. If he’s still anything like he was in the shed all those years ago, I really needed to tread lightly. But for the life of me that blinking sign that says shut the fuck up wasn’t flashing as brightly in front of me as it should be.

  He stops his pacing and glares at me. “Lay the fuck off already, Sin. Hell, I’m trying to explain something to you, and you’re being a bitch about it.”

  Did I just hear the beginning ding of a fight? Yes, I do believe I did.

  I narrow my eyes, unfold my arms, and stalk over to him. “Listen here, douche weasel,” I fume, poking a finger into his chest, “I don’t give a shit what you’re trying to do. You are the one that chose a piece of technology over some pussy. What… are you gay or something?”

  He doesn’t say anything for the longest time and merely stares down at the finger touching his chest. When he glances back up at me, I know I’ve fucked up. His eyes are as dark as night. His lips are stretched into a thin line, and his jaw is ticking like a badass son of a bitch.

  “I would suggest you remove that finger before you fucking lose it, Sin. I don’t hit women, so you’re safe there. But if you don’t want your pants around your ankles and your ass in the air, then I would suggest you heed my motherfucking warning,” he forces through his teeth.

  I laugh. I motherfucking laugh. I swear, you’d think that I am asking for this shit. Here is one seriously pissed off man, and I’m freaking laughing in his face. Could my ignorance shine through any more than it already has?

  The next thing I know he has his hand wrapped around my wrist squeezing so damned tight I think I’m about to lose my breath. He’s forcing me backward with his giant steps until my back comes into contact with the wall—hard. All the air in my lungs whoosh out of me, and his face is in front of mine, all within the span of ten seconds.

  I knew one of these days that my mouth and attitude was going to get me into trouble. However, I didn’t know it was going to be today, and with my baby daddy of all people. It’s not that I’m scared of him because that’s the furthest from the truth. It’s the level of turned on that I am that confuses and irritates me at the same time. What was it about pain that drives me wild? Is it the fear that something could happen, but I’m putting trust in the person doing it not to go too far? Or is it the fact that it’s Alex who’s causing the pain? I would love to go with the first option, but I doubt that’s the case.

  I’m still completely pissed off at him, but that doesn’t mean that I can’t be attracted to him.

  “Let. Me. Go,” I say in low warning.

  He presses his smirking face close to mine. “What are you going to do about it? Huh? You’re a little too small to tell people what to do, aren’t you?”

  I growl low in my throat and twist my hand, trying to get his grip on me to lessen even the slightest. To my dismay, his grip stays strong. I fucking hate men. They always use their strength to their advantage against someone smaller than them. I wiggle against him, and he presses himself against me harder. We are now touching from chest to knees, and I can’t help but revel in the feeling of his muscles forcing themselves against my soft flesh. Where he is taller than me, my chest comes to the middle of his torso, so the push and pull of his breathing is doing exciting things to my nipples.

  “Back off, Pierce.”

  I can already hear my voice becoming breathless the longer we stand like this. Within a moment, I’m liable to throw caution to the wind and just freaking take him. My body can be such a traitorous bitch.

  I hear him chuckle, and I glance up to see that he has that heart-stopping smile spread across his lips. I hate him for that almost as much as I hate myself for getting into this situation.

  “Are you sure that’s what you want?” he asks. He flicks the tip of his finger on my nose and then continues, “Because it sure looks like you want me to fuck you.”

  I try jerking my wrist from his hand again only to have him force it against the wall over my head. I whimper, close my eyes, and plead for my body to get on the same page as my head. Anyone could walk in here at any time. I don’t want anyone to see me in such a compromising position. I take a deep breath and raise my other hand to smack him, only to open my eyes and see that his reaction is lightning fast, and he has both my hands in one of his above my head. I growl in frustration, twisting and turning my body against his. I feel his length begin to harden against my stomach, and for the life of me I
think I’m fighting to get closer instead of away from him.

  I wait with bated breath as his head begins to descend toward mine. My eyes close to half mast and I am about to give in to the dark desires filling my mind and body. I hear yelling outside the door, and it doesn’t register to me until the door bursts open. I glance over to see one pissed off Triple-A standing there in the doorway, his hands clenched into fists.

  “Get the fuck away from her!” I hear him shout, and Alex just barely glances over his shoulder at the new intrusion.

  He barks out a laugh. “And who's going to make me, kid?”

  I see a malicious smile tug at Triple-A’s lips, and just from that I know Alex is going to get fucked up by his own son. Triple-A cracks his neck from side to side, and I tremble from the popping sounds his neck rings out. I know shit’s about to get real because I’ve seen this look from my brothers right before they were gearing up for a fight.

  “Triple-A, honey, don’t worry. I’ve got this. Just go to Dom’s house, and I’ll be there shortly.” I try to calm the firestorm I see swirling in his eyes.

  I chance a look up at Alex, and I see that his head is cocked to the side, and he’s staring Triple-A down. I think he’s about to figure it out until his smooth voice drifts through the room.

  “Honey?”

  He releases me from the wall and starts walking toward Triple-A with determination in every step. Triple-A, by the way, is not backing down in the least. I can see the storm clouds brewing overhead, and the only thing that has me moving from my spot and running toward my son is the flash of recognition I see in Alex’s eyes. I grab Triple-A by the collar and try to force him out of the room. But due to his height and the fact that he’s built like a fucking wall, I end up just hurting myself in the process.

  “You look familiar,” I hear Alex whisper, and I know I have to get Triple-A the hell out of here.

  Triple-A scoffs and I fucking know I’m in trouble. “Well, old fuck, I would think you would recognize me.”

  Yes, floor, just swallow me right up.

  Chapter Twenty

  Alex

  I stare after Sin as she all but drags the smart mouth boy out of the shop. What the hell did he mean by that? I glance all around me and see that people have stopped what they’re doing and are looking at me. I want to shy away from the attention, but I did bring it on myself; I was the one that came in here like a Neanderthal and demanded Sin speak to me. It wasn’t one of my best moments for sure.

  However, the only thing I cared about right now was finding out about that kid who’d come bursting into the back room. She’d called him something—Triple-A, I think. Yes, that was it. I needed to learn about him and see what the talk is around the shop. I hate to admit it, but talking to James may be my only option, in spite of the fact that I’d pissed him off when I came in here earlier.

  James was a tough nut to crack anyway. Now that I had successfully pissed him off, he was going to be even more of a dick. That was just freaking peachy. I didn’t have the time to sit here and try to pry the information out of him. I’m pretty sure that’s exactly what I’d need to do, and I needed that information five minutes ago. I knew that it was going to take a little coaxing to get it out of him. He was loyal to Sin and, obviously, to the boy as well.

  Fuck!

  I sigh and venture a glance at James to see that he’s sitting in his chair staring at me. As if reading my mind, he groans and shakes his head in my direction as I make my way toward him. I knew that it was a long shot as I came to a stop next to the edge of his booth. He sat there with his arms crossed over his chest and just glared at me.

  I leaned on the partition and slowly circle my finger on the wood absent-mindedly. “So, James, what’s with the wannabe badass?”

  “Wouldn’t you like to know, Pierce,” he snorts, raising his hand to check his cuticles. “What is that saying? Oh, the sins of the father… I think you need to take that to heart and get the fuck out.”

  I cock my head to the side and just study his expression. He seems laid back as if he doesn’t have a care in the world. Why should he? He has me right where he wants me. He knows that I can’t just walk away after being told something like that. It’ll eat away at me until I can’t take it anymore. It’s already starting to nag at me, and I can feel the need to ask him burning its way through me.

  “James, man, just tell me what I want to know,” I plead with him, now fully leaning against the partition. I have a feeling if it weren't between us right now I would probably be in the man’s lap trying to get answers.

  “Pierce, take what I said at face value and go the fuck away. If you want to know what that was all about, you need to talk to Sin. Trust me, she has all the answers.”

  I stood there for a moment longer before giving up and walking toward the door. I had no idea what the hell I was going to do, but I knew someone that could help me out with that. Sin wasn’t going to talk to me; that was a given. I also knew that her dad would rather beat the hell out of me than help me out. Since I wanted to forgo getting another ass whooping, I decide for a safer option and go to see Tank and the boys at the gym. Maybe I can burn off some of this frustration while I’m at it.

  “Catch ya later, James,” I say, making my way to the door. I was about to push it open when I heard a throat clearing from behind me. I turned to see James leaning against the partition with his arms crossed in front of him. I cock an eyebrow in his direction, causing him to snicker.

  “You know, I see where the boy gets it; it’s like you’re twins,” he says and then gives me a wink before he goes back to what he was doing.

  I furrowed my brows, and without another word made my way outside. James was all the time trying to be cryptic like that. He thought he was motherfucking Yoda or something. I’m sorry, but blowing shit out of your mouth isn’t Yoda material. It just means you have too much hot air to keep your mouth shut.

  I roll my eyes as I get into my rental. That’s another thing that I can’t stand. What was a man well over six foot going to do with a motherfucking Volkswagen Beetle? Yes, unfortunately for me, I let Sin pick out the rental for me while I was in the process of filing the police reports. I swear it’s like trying to put a dick up someone’s ass. Dammit, I need a vat of fucking lube by itself just to squeeze into this thing.

  “I-I-I-I-I-I’m-m-m-m-m-m-m gay!” I hear someone yell out of their window. I pinch the bridge of my nose and curse Sin one more time before doing the impossible and folding myself into the car.

  She really needs to pay for this. I don’t know how I’m going to make that possible, but it was going to happen. This warranted a payback for sure. I blow out a breath and pull away from the curb, trying to ignore the cat calls coming my way. Will this hell never end? I mean, seriously? I already feel very emasculated right now, and they’re only making it worse.

  After finally weaving my way through traffic and getting to the gym. I literally fall out of the son of a bitch after I park it. To make matters worse, asshole Dane was standing right outside the door when I show up, and as soon as he sees me, he bursts into a fit of uncontrollable laughter. I mean, grabbing his knees, stitch in his side, tears running down his face uncontrollable laughter. I was beginning to wonder if I was going to have to resuscitate him. It wouldn’t have been pretty, but I couldn’t just let him die, even if the son of a bitch deserved it.

  “Shut the hell up, Dane,” I groan as I get up from the ground.

  “What the hell did you do, Pierce?” he barely forces out through a chuckle. “Please, tell me that’s not your car.”

  I groan. “Why would I drive a car that wasn’t mine? Especially this piece of shit.”

  He falls back against the door—his eyes as big as saucers and his face turning a dark shade of red. His breaths wheeze in and out of him. “Oh my fucking God! This is too good!”

  “Shut the hell up, Dane!”

  Dane would remind you of a high school bully with the exception we’re no longer
in high school; we’re fucking grown adults.

  “Where’s your truck?” he asks, sobering just a bit from his laughing episode.

  I flip him off because I know he already knows I wrecked my baby. News doesn’t take too long to travel around this place, and this is the first place it usually goes. Considering Jon and Draven were both in the police division, I knew they’d already heard about my misfortune and told everyone here. Jon was the FBI Special Forces Unit Chief, so there was nothing that went on without him knowing. Now Draven, that was a different story. He was a Sergeant in the Drug Task Force of the police station. So, either way, I was fucked.

  I give him the evil eye while opening the door to Tank’s and walk through. My head drops back in defeat. Can they be any more transparent? The motherfuckers. Not only are they going to give me a tough time about wrecking my truck, but they’re going to go above and beyond the call of douche-baggery.

  “Seriously, guys? What the fuck are you doing with the wheelchair, crutches, and a sign that reads ‘fuck you, cripple.’ I hope you know this means war, bitches.”

  I try to act pissed. I really do. But there’s only so long I can keep up the act. These assholes know I’m going to laugh at this shit. It doesn’t matter if it was meant for me or not; they know me. And they know what’ll make me burst with laughter and what’ll piss me off. It’s part of the reason I love and hate these guys so much.

  I walk the rest of the way inside and pick up the pen on the sign-in sheet. I hear the men ruffling around and taking it all down. Thank God. I’d hate to hulk out on all of them and beat their asses. They better be lucky that this shit was funny or else I would be doing said beating right now. I feel a hand drop down on my shoulder, and I turn to see Jon sidle up next to me. I roll my eyes, but can’t keep the smile off my face. I should’ve known the bastard would sell me out.

  “Let me guess, this was all you?” I ask, arching an eyebrow.

  He tries to keep it together, but I know he’s seconds from breaking. “Why would I ever do that?”