by Vanessa Vale
Setting my mug down, I tried to make sense of his request. “You mean, before we meet Ivy for dinner?”
He gave me a short nod.
“But we just found her.” Leaning over the table, I tried not to let my frustration show. “After all these years, Cooper, she’s here. She’s waiting for us.”
Cooper shook his head. “She wasn’t waiting for us. You saw her expression just like I did. She wasn’t happy to see us, she—”
“She was surprised, that’s all.” My protest was just a tad too vehement because I was trying to convince him as well as myself. He was right. She hadn’t exactly looked psyched to see us. If anything, she’d looked scared. That fear had been a punch in the gut coming from Ivy. She’d known us her whole life and knew we’d never, ever hurt her. The last time she’d seen us we’d made her come in the back of a truck, for Christ’s sakes. Why would she be afraid of us?
Tonight, I aimed to find out. But first, I had to convince Cooper that we had a shot. “So maybe she wasn’t as excited to see us as we’d hoped, but a lot of time has passed. Remember, she’s not the same girl we knew either.” No, she was so much more.
He was shaking his head before I finished. “It’s not just that.”
Ah hell. I recognized that intense look on his face. The nightmare must have messed with him because he’d gone someplace dark. Somewhere I wasn’t going to be able to reach him, no matter how much I said.
“I’ve been thinking,” he started.
Shit. I shifted in the booth, flagged down the waitress for more coffee. Whatever he’d been thinking, it couldn’t have been good.
“I think we should let her go.”
I stared at him in shocked silence. “Let her go?”
I shook my head and leaned forward again, far enough so he was forced to look at me. “She’s the one. You know that as well as I do. We knew it the night in Baker’s field. We wouldn’t have touched her otherwise. We’ve been waiting years to have another shot with her and now…what? You want to quit before we’ve even begun?”
I saw a flash of guilt in his eyes and wanted to kick myself for giving him shit when he was already in a low place. “Where’s this coming from?” I asked. “Why the change of heart?”
He scratched the back of his neck as he stared at the eggs like they might leap off his plate. “I just…I don’t know that I’m ready.”
I was careful to school my features. If there was one thing I knew about my best friend, it was that he didn’t want my pity. I knew exactly what he meant, of course, but I played dumb. “Not ready? I know for a fact you haven’t been with a woman in ages.” Since before the accident. Fuck, longer than that. There weren’t women to fuck in the desert. I left that part unsaid as I gave him a teasing grin. “Are you telling me you didn’t notice how hot she looked in that sundress?” I shifted in my seat, my cock at half-mast just thinking about the way the scooped neckline accentuated the soft curves of her breasts.
His grin was reluctant. “Of course, I noticed. Jesus, that woman is still as gorgeous as ever. More so.” He fidgeted with his fork and I could see that he was switching tactics. The man was scared, and maybe rightfully so, but he had to get back to living his life. He had to move on and he had to do it with me and Ivy.
“Hard to believe she’s not taken,” he said.
No kidding. She was beautiful, smart, funny. Perfect. Why hadn’t a man snatched her up by now?
Sure enough, Cooper was looking for an excuse to run away. Ivy was real. What we wanted with her was real. It wasn’t a dream any longer. She wasn’t a dream. A fantasy that I jerked off to in the shower. Not that I could blame him. Moving on was a lot harder for him than it was for me. The army had chewed us up and spit us out, but we had the rest of our lives ahead of us. No war. No bad guys. No IEDs or anti-aircraft fire.
I took a sip of my coffee. “I didn’t see a wedding ring, did you?”
He shook his head. “That doesn’t mean she’s not dating someone.”
“She said she wasn’t,” I countered.
“You saw the way she looked at us. Like we were ghosts or something. Clearly, she hasn’t been pining over us these last seven years.”
I shrugged, feigning a nonchalance I didn’t feel. Too much was riding on this for me to take it lightly. “Seven years is a long time. Besides, so what if she hasn’t pined for us, or whatever the fuck it’s called? We never asked her to wait. We wanted her to go. We just didn’t think it would be for this long. Besides, you know how it works as well as anyone. We know she’s ours, now it’s up to us to make her see that.”
I’d spent half the night imagining just how we’d prove it to her. The last time we’d been with her, the sex had been great, but Lord knows we had no idea what we were doing. None of us had ever done it before. We’d been a bunch of fumbling virgins in the back of a pickup, but we’d made it good for her. Hell, it had been incredible to sink into her, to watch the arousal and need fill her eyes, to feel the way her body softened and took me in. The way she clenched and squeezed around my dick as she came. Again and again. The fact that she’d come for us, two fumbling teenagers, was a sign or something. It was that good.
Now, we were older, wiser, and well versed in the ways of pleasuring a woman. I knew where I wanted to start. That dress of hers had done little to conceal her tits, her nipples pressing against the thin material just begging to be sucked. I remembered their color, the way they’d tightened in my mouth. The whole time we’d been talking to her, a little part of my brain couldn’t stop obsessing over what she wore underneath the sundress. Clearly there was no bra. But had she been wearing panties? If so, were they lacy? Pink? A fucking thong so her perfect ass was bare?
“Earth to Rory.” Cooper was watching me and I forced my brain to come back from its dirty wandering and focus on my best friend, who still looked like he had the weight of the world on his shoulders. “Look, if she’s happy with her life, I don’t know that we should be coming in and—”
“Fuck that.” I tempered my voice so the other tables didn’t hear my swearing. “I refuse to listen to any more of your stupid excuses.” I set my mug of coffee down on the table. “She’s ours, we’re not just going to let her walk away from us again. Not now when we have something to offer her.”
“What do I have to offer?” His voice was hoarse and filled with unspoken emotions that made my chest ache on his behalf. “Seriously, Rory, I’d like to know…what the hell do you think I can give Ivy?”
I opened my mouth to answer, but he wasn’t done.
“She hasn’t been waiting all these years so she can settle down with a broken man who can’t even sleep through the night like a normal person. She can’t be interested in a man that killed more than a handful of men.”
“Fuck that shit.” I tried to meet his gaze but he was looking everywhere but at me, like he was too ashamed to face me. I leaned forward and dropped my voice so the rest of the restaurant didn’t hear. “The chopper crash wasn’t your fault.” They were words I said often enough, but until he believed them, it wouldn’t make a bit of fucking difference. “I know you’re going through hell, man. But you’re getting better every day, physically and in every other way. Ivy liked you just fine before. She’s not a bitch. She’s not looking for perfect. She never was. She’s looking for us, the guys who claimed her that night.”
“We’re not the same.”
“No, we’re not. We’re better. Smarter. Wiser. Know the shit that’s out there and will keep her safe.”
He gave a small nod but I knew he wasn’t hearing me.
I fell back in my seat with a sigh. “I know it’s not easy. Shit, maybe it never will be. What happened to you won’t go away and it will never be right, but it will get a little easier with time. Isn’t that what the doctors are always telling you?”
The corner of his mouth turned up in a minor semblance of a smile, but he didn’t respond.
“I know for a fact that it was thoughts of Ivy that pull
ed you through in the hospital. I fucking heard you call out her name.” I watched his reaction and he gave me a grudging nod of agreement. He’d made me talk about her and relive that night with him countless times after the accident. When he got tired of reminiscing about her smile, her hair, her scent, the feel of her pussy…that’s when we’d switch to talking about how it could be. How it would be once we got her back. And we were getting her back. He just needed to get his head out of his ass long enough to do so.
Cooper’s smile grew and I knew he was remembering the plans we’d made for our future home with our gorgeous wife. “That was a good dream.”
“It was more than a dream, Cooper. It’s our fucking destiny, and you know it. We’ve found her. Seen her. Even made a damn date with her. Don’t you dare give up on that now when we’re so close.”
For the first time in a long time, Cooper gave me a real smile. Not rueful or self-deprecating, but an honest-to-God genuine grin. “Yeah, all right. Let’s go get our girl.”
Damn straight.
CHAPTER FOUR
IVY
My aunt stared at me like I was a crazy person and I couldn’t blame her. I was standing by the front door, shifting from one foot to the other as I called upstairs to Lily for the third time. “Come on, hon, you’re going to be late.”
Aunt Sarah tipped her head to the side as she peered at me through her bifocals. In her late seventies, she was my second mother. Since my real one didn’t count, Grandma was first. Then, when she passed, Aunt Sarah had definitely filled that role. And boy, had I needed someone. Eighteen and pregnant? I couldn’t have done it without her. While her hair was still long—she refused to cut it and have helmet-head like an old lady—she’d decided to let the gray show. Even though she’d grown up in Bridgewater, she didn’t dress like a cowgirl. In fact, I’d never seen her in jeans. Her style was simple, with bright colors and bold jewelry.
She looked at the watch on her slim wrist. “The movie doesn’t start for an hour, Ivy. We’ve got plenty of time.”
I tried to force a smile but I was pretty sure it came off as a grimace. I needed them gone. Out. Far, far away. And I needed it now. I’d been on a few dates, but this wasn’t a real date. This was Cooper and Rory. There was no comparison. Dates were namby-pamby men who brought flowers and took me to a restaurant with an all-you-can-eat salad bar and kissed my cheek at the end of the night. Cooper and Rory? They were…indescribable.
Aunt Sarah still watched me, sizing me up from my peep-toe heels to my sexy dress. The dress was little and black, and I referred to it as my “sexy dress” on the few occasions that I’d worn it. It was the only one in my closet that didn’t look like it was meant for parent/teacher night at school and that in and of itself made it sexy.
“Do you have a date tonight?” Aunt Sarah asked.
Date! No, I was having dinner with the two men who’d claimed me, body and soul, seven years ago and left me to live my dream. And gave me Lily.
I wasn’t entirely sure how to respond to that while being truthful. This morning, when I’d asked her to watch Lily for me, I’d told her I had plans tonight. I’d specifically said plans and not date for this very reason. The butterflies in my stomach went wild at the word “date.” That one-syllable made my knees weak and my breathing uneven. Holy cow, it had been way too long since I’d been out with a man. And tonight I was going out with two men. Two insanely hot, ridiculously sexy men. Two men who’d fucked me senseless and who looked at me like they’d like to do it again.
But this was not a date, I reminded myself. Again. This was a catch up with old friends. It was a way for me to make it clear that I’d moved on. I would be firm, but polite. They meant nothing to me. Yeah, right.
Aunt Sarah waited for a response.
“Not exactly a date,” I mumbled before turning back to holler for Lily once more.
When I turned around, she was eyeing my outfit that screamed date, but fortunately she remained quiet.
Ten minutes later they were finally out the door, Lily tucked happily in her booster to see the movie she’d been talking about all week. Thank the Lord. This night would be nerve wracking enough without Cooper and Rory running into Lily when they picked me up in…oh holy crap. Five minutes. I scanned the hallway and the kitchen. Toys were strewn as far as the eye could see. Pink girlie stuff everywhere. There was no way I’d scour this place of all signs of a child before they arrived. I grabbed my wrap and purse from the hallway table and went out to the porch. I just wouldn’t invite them in, that was all.
I’d been on a few dates over the years and one thing I could say about Bridgewater men…they knew how to do it right. Cooper and Rory arrived right on time. And with flowers.
Even though I was prepared to see them this time, my heart still went into overdrive when they came up the walk. They both wore button-down shirts and fitted pants. Their hair was neat, their faces clean-shaven. They still had that rugged, almost dangerous look about them. “You boys, um…look nice.” Crap, was that my voice? It sounded breathy, like I was a phone sex worker or something.
“You look amazing.” Cooper handed me the flowers and gave me a kiss on the cheek that made my lungs stop working. Never one to be outdone, Rory came to my side and placed a hand on my waist before giving me a chaste kiss as well. My skin tingled where their lips had touched. God, what would it be like if they got me naked and not standing outside on my front porch in broad daylight?
They were both in my personal space, their heat sheltering me from the soft breeze and their scent…oh Lord, that scent. The air was filled with that earthy, manly smell that made my lower belly feel heavy and my skin tingle. It was just as I remembered it from all those years ago.
That was when I knew—there was no way I could survive an entire night with these two. Not without either losing my mind or dropping my panties. For years, I’d been telling myself that their effect on me back in high school could be chalked up to teenage hormones. I hadn’t felt anything else like it ever since.
But now…it was back. The feel of Rory’s hand on my waist was enough to make my pussy throb. And if Cooper didn’t stop looking at me like that—like he was going to throw me down and fuck me on the front porch—I might lose all control and start begging for it.
I’d made a mistake. A monumental mistake. I should never have said yes to this date…or non-date…or whatever this was. I wasn’t strong enough. My resistance was weak. My heart, it was too damn fragile.
“Let me…um, let me put these flowers in water. I’ll be right back.”
I dashed into the kitchen, filled a pitcher I used for lemonade and under the sink and put the flowers in. I’d tend to them later. Taking a deep breath, I returned to the men on the porch, locked the door behind me.
“Shall we?” Rory took a step back and offered me his arm. I looked at the bent elbow, the muscles that played beneath the fabric of his shirt. My mouth went dry and that was just his arm.
There was no turning back now. They were waiting patiently. I owed it to myself, to women everywhere, to take this one night with them. I’d thought about this for years. I’d kick myself. No, I’d probably kill myself if I walked inside and shut the door on them. One night. Just one. How hard could it be?
I placed my hand in the crook of his elbow and discovered Rory was hard. Very hard and I had to wonder if that was all over. God, I had the mind of a slut.
Even the car ride was difficult for me, being in the closed space with them, breathing them in, listening to the rough timbre of their voices. Luckily, they kept a steady stream of conversation going because my brain had officially turned to mush in the presence of so much testosterone.
I hadn’t remembered Rory as the chatty one, but he talked most of the way to the restaurant, filling me in on the goings-on in Bridgewater and asking questions about my home, my job. I found myself giving him one-word answers because I was so nervous about revealing too much. Lily was my whole world. It was nearly impossible to talk a
bout my life without mentioning her, so my only option was not to talk.
Things got a little easier once we sat down to dinner. They’d chosen a lovely restaurant. Not too fancy, but it had an outdoor patio that overlooked the water. I’d never been before, but had heard it was good. Eating out with a six-year-old took me to different places, mostly ones that served food quickly and had macaroni and cheese on the menu. This place? They wanted their guests to linger. The wine helped me calm down, as well as the people around us. It was easier to ignore the mens’ heated looks and their heady scent when a waiter was standing next to me refilling my water glass or an elderly couple beside us started talking a little too loudly.
By the time the main course arrived, I was almost feeling like myself again. The butterflies had calmed down some and I stopped freezing up every time they asked me a question about my life. I also felt more comfortable asking them about their lives over the past seven years and listened in awe as they told me about their experiences in the military. Rory did most of the talking about that and he quickly glossed over their last tour and discharge from the army.
I noticed Cooper’s jaw clench and his body tense, but he took a deep breath, finally spoke. “We’re here because we’ve missed you, Ivy,” Cooper said, lifting his arm to indicate the restaurant, perhaps even Seattle. The topic change was surprising. I wasn’t sure if it was because he no longer wanted to talk about their time in the service—it seemed it set him on edge—or if he really wanted to talk about us. Or lack of us. Or…crap, a possibility of an us.
He leaned forward slightly and reached for my hand, took it. I could have pulled away, but I didn’t. It was large and warm as it enveloped mine. I felt the callouses, the roughness of the life he’d led in just his palm.
The simple words should have scared me. We’ve missed you.
They not only didn’t scare me, they made my chest expand like my heart was about to take flight. I longed to hear them, to know that they’d been longing for me as much as I had for them. Maybe that was why I didn’t respond right away. I had a whole speech prepared, but it went unspoken as I met Cooper’s gaze. I couldn’t look away from the intensity, the longing.