by Moira Rogers
“She almost isn’t.” Keith sounded exhausted. “The guilt’s eating her alive. But even I didn’t think Matthews was nuts enough to send people halfway across the country to hurt her.”
No one had. “He’s obviously lost what little shit he had left. You and Abby just have the misfortune of being his targets.”
“And Brynn.”
Joe gritted his teeth. “Thanks for pointing that out, Winston. I’m not having a hard enough time keeping the protective crap in check.”
“She’s a lot harder than her sister, you know. Brynn, I mean.” Keith opened his eyes and glanced at Joe. “Abby’s strong, but even with everything that’s happened—even losing her parents and raising her kid sister—she’s not hard. It still surprises her how much people can suck.”
It was all Joe could do not to laugh. “You mean Abby’s like you, and Brynn’s pragmatism freaks you out a little.”
Keith glared. “I’m not exactly naïve.”
“No, you’re not.” He made a face as he slowed for an intersection. “But you want to believe in fairy tales, even when you know you can’t. You always have.”
“Well, she sure the hell doesn’t. If she weren’t so stressed out right now, I’d tell Gavin she should sit in on the meetings. She’s got a pretty keen mind when it comes to weird political shit.”
“Brynn’s sharp,” Joe agreed. “But, right now, she’s flailing.”
Keith remained silent as Joe guided the truck up the hill that led to the alphas’ house. He didn’t speak again until the truck was in park and Joe reached to turn off the engine. “Is she really going to do it? Is she thinking about becoming one of us?”
Joe stared at the steering wheel. “Yeah. She wants to be safe, but she doesn’t want Abby to feel responsible for her. Not anymore. Not after all that’s happened.”
“Shit. What a fucking mess.”
“Yeah.” He saw no reason to share Brynn’s proposition of casual, no-strings sex, especially since it would probably earn him a punch to the jaw. “Hell of a time for it, with all the alphas coming in.”
“Don’t forget the witch.” Keith sighed and rubbed his jaw. “I didn’t even get a chance to tell you about that mess. Maritza, the witch I’d made contact with in Europe, was supposed to meet me. Her and her student. But when I got there, it was just the student, and she was scared half out of her mind.”
“Maritza was dead, huh?”
“Ripped to pieces. The girl’s twenty-five, thirty tops. Maybe she’s got power, but she doesn’t have the kind of experience we need in an ally.”
Now she was another person who’d need protection. “The world’s falling apart, my friend. I hope you know what you’re doing.”
Keith sighed and yanked the door’s handle. “Let’s go in there before Gavin thinks we’ve chickened out.”
Joe took the steps two at a time and knocked quickly. Gavin opened the door and waved them in. “We were just getting started.”
The alpha’s wife was seated at the long, scarred wooden table with a young redhead. The girl’s face looked pale, and three angry red claw marks cut across her cheek and the line of her jaw. She lifted tired blue eyes when they stepped into the room, but her tension eased when her gaze fell on Keith. “Mr. Winston.”
“I told you, Keith’s fine.” Keith smiled, the gentle, reassuring one Joe had seen him flash a hundred times. “Sasha, this is Joe.”
“Hey there.” Instead of stepping forward, which might have scared her, he held his ground and raised a hand in greeting. “Nice to meet you.”
She blinked at him and nodded, quick and a little shy. “Hello.”
Gavin cleared his throat. “Keith? Why don’t you tell us what you had in mind for the summit?”
“First off, Lawrence and Irene had to back out.” Keith slid onto the bench next to Sasha, but left a few feet between them. Even with the extra space, Sasha scooted a little closer to Sam, who wrapped a maternal arm around her shoulder.
Keith kept talking as if he hadn’t noticed it. “We need to make a pact, decide if we’re going to take a stand. What happened with Abby’s brother is the final straw.”
“We’ve been taking a stand,” Joe argued. “What you’re talking about is war. That’s what we need to decide on.”
“Then it needs to be war.” Keith sounded nothing like the exhausted, worn-down man who’d come back from Europe a few months ago. The fire was back in his voice. The conviction. “Hiding isn’t working. They turn men by the hundreds out there. They’re making armies full of entitled men who think that their power means they can have whatever they want.”
Gavin glanced at Sasha. “You think allying ourselves with the wizards is the answer?”
Sasha winced visibly, and Samantha shot her husband an annoyed look as she spoke. “I think we can’t snub allies, no matter where we find them. Keith obviously agrees.”
“Normally, I’d be inclined to agree with both of you.” Gavin reached in his pocket and pulled out a pack of cigarettes. “But when you start talking about fighting beside the wizards and against other wolves, you’d be surprised how quickly your grand idea puts you in the minority. It’s a tough fucking sell, Winston.”
Keith opened his mouth, but Sam cut him off. “If you light that cigarette in this house, Gavin Hamilton, you’ll be digging it out of your chest.”
Gavin dropped the pack to the table. “Fine, woman. Have it your way. Doesn’t change the conversation any.”
Joe cleared his throat. “Maybe we should have Brynn talk to the other alphas.”
“Brynn?” Sam’s gaze snapped from her husband to Joe. “Explain.”
“She knows firsthand what the alphas out there are doing to people,” Joe explained. “Her sister was turned against her will, she was kidnapped, and her brother was murdered. They have to listen to her. All the hypotheticals in the world can’t match someone who’s been there.”
“Can she handle that?”
Keith spoke up again. “I think she can. She’s strong. She’s determined.”
“More than that, I think she’d want to do it.” He hoped like hell he wasn’t wrong. “She needs something to do. She feels helpless.”
Gavin scuffed the toe of his boot against the floor. “It couldn’t hurt anything, I suppose, if she can handle it.”
“Abby can’t be there.” Keith’s voice was uncompromising. “The last thing she needs is to hear a litany of all the things that have happened to her family. She still takes responsibility.”
Joe made a face. “Brynn wouldn’t want her there. No way.”
“But can Abby take that?” Sam looked at Keith, who squirmed a little under her unwavering gaze. “Abby’s still learning how to handle her instincts. Can you keep her from feeling like she should protect Brynn from this?”
He looked uncomfortable, but he nodded. “It’ll take a few days for her to get balanced again. But Joe’s been taking care of Brynn, and that helps.”
It was Joe’s turn to squirm as all eyes turned to him. “It’s the helpless thing that’s getting her. I’ve been trying to help, but I don’t know how much good I’m doing.”
Sam’s look was particularly sharp. “I’ve spoken with Cindy. If Brynn makes the decision to follow through with the transformation, Cindy is willing to serve as her Guide.”
He glanced away. He could handle that. Cindy was safe.
Gavin rubbed a hand over his face. “I still don’t like it. I don’t like when people in turmoil try to make this choice.”
“No one likes it, Gavin,” Keith said. “But sometimes there’s no going back to the life you left behind. Sometimes it’s the only way you can get control again.”
For the first time, Sasha spoke up. “Do you still have the training spell?”
Joe’s brow furrowed in confusion. “What’s a training spell?”
“I-I think it was used for new wolves, in the past.” Sasha fidgeted a little under the weight of everyone’s undivided attention, but she pre
ssed on. “It’s simpler than the bonding spell you use, and temporary. Two people are connected, and one experiences everything the other does. Not physically, but like—like a vision. The new wolves panicked less the first time if they already knew what a change felt like.”
“Huh.” Keith leaned forward and braced his elbows on the table. “Is it something like the bonding spell? Something that we can do, I mean?”
“I don’t know. I know how to do it, but I really…don’t have the training to teach others. I’m still an apprentice.”
Samantha’s arm tightened in a comforting hug. “That’s okay, sweetie. If you can do it, it might be useful. It’s something to think about, anyway, though I don’t know if I’d want to try it for the first time on a traumatized girl. Brynn’s been through enough.”
That was putting it mildly. “I can bring her back tomorrow,” Joe offered. “Let her talk to you two, and to Keith and Sasha. We can see if she’s up for meeting with the other alphas.”
“If it works?” Sam asked quietly. “If the other alphas agree? I’m not the military expert, obviously, but it’s an awful lot of fronts to fight a war on.”
Keith shook his head. “We don’t fight on all fronts. Matthews is insane. We have to deal with him and his pack first, because we can’t have him at our backs. But after that…Minneapolis. That’s the key. Most of the alphas in the Midwest answer to Simon Brown in one way or another.”
Joe managed not to choke on his beer, but just barely. “Jesus, you’re not messing around, are you?”
“No. No, I’m really not.”
Gavin straightened and squared his shoulders. “Joe, see if Brynn will help. Keith, you and Sasha can talk to her, as well. Let her know how important this is.” He glanced at his wife. “Whether or not the other alphas join us…we fight.”
Sam frowned. “If the other alphas don’t join us, will there be enough of us left after the fight to make victory worth it?”
“Maybe not,” he admitted. “But if we just sit here…”
Keith glanced at Joe, and Joe saw his own understanding reflected in his friend’s eyes. “We can’t assume we’ll be any safer here, Sam. They attacked Brynn and Abby in our town. In my house.”
“I know. I know. But that won’t make it easier to watch my pack fight and die.”
“Nothing will, except fighting and not dying,” Gavin said resolutely. “So talk to Brynn, and let’s get this shit done. I, for one, am tired of sitting here on my ass while the rest of the world falls apart.”
Joe nodded. “Got it. She’ll do it.” She had to.
Brynn watched Abby fit another piece into the gigantic puzzle spread out over the table and wondered, not for the first time in the last hour, if her sister had lost her mind.
Puzzles had never been particularly soothing to Brynn. A few minutes of trying to differentiate between eight different shades of sky blue was enough to frustrate her, so she’d spent the last half hour sorting the pieces by color while Abby quietly turned the disjointed piles of cardboard into a picture of the Rocky Mountains.
Maybe they were both losing their minds.
Brynn picked up a purple and blue piece and studied it for a moment before breaking the silence. “I want to tell you something, but you’re going to get mad at me.”
Abby looked up from the solid white puzzle piece in her hand and arched an eyebrow. “Mad enough to kick you out of the house and finish this puzzle by myself?”
“Mad enough to make me finish it myself as punishment.” She tried to make it a joke, but it came out sounding a little desperate.
Her sister fastened a level, serious look on her and waited.
Brynn set the puzzle piece down and took a deep breath as she tried to summon the careful, considered words she’d rehearsed in her head a dozen times. She’d taken classes in public speaking, had studied diplomacy and debate with an eye at getting involved in government. She was coherent. Eloquent.
Except when she opened her mouth, the worst possible words tumbled out. “I want to be a werewolf.”
Abby stared at her for what seemed like hours. “You what?”
Shit. “Don’t look at me like that, Abby. I’m not saying I think it will be fun and romantic, but it’s practical. It’s logical. If I do it, it’ll make me safer.”
Brynn expected her to yell. A month ago, she would have. Instead, she picked up two puzzle pieces and studied them. “I’m glad you’ve given it sufficient thought. What do you think? Are these two part of the rock face or the soil at the base of this foothill?”
“Abby…” She reached out and covered her sister’s hand. “Is that it? You’re not mad?”
Abby hesitated, then grasped Brynn’s hand. “I haven’t done a very good job of protecting you lately. The truth is, I don’t how anymore.” She exhaled a shaky breath. “You’ve seen the worst of it, I guess. If that didn’t make you want to run screaming, I don’t know what would.”
It made her want to run screaming, but telling Abby that wouldn’t make her sister feel better. So she forced a smile and squeezed Abby’s hand. “You protected me more than you ever should have had to. You raised me when you were barely more than a kid. You helped me get into college. You walked into a trap for me. But I don’t need you to protect me. Especially not if you’re going to get yourself hurt doing it. You think I can live with that?”
“I think you shouldn’t worry so much about me,” Abby countered. “I’m not hurt. I’m fine.”
“You’re not fine, Abby. You’re sitting here staring at puzzle pieces like they’re the most important thing in the world.”
She dropped the small pieces of cardboard on the table. “What do you expect me to do, Brynn? Focus on the fact that a crazy werewolf sent someone after us? Someone who’s probably dead now, judging from how enraged Keith was?” She bit her lip. “I’d rather put it out of my mind for now. Keith and Joe will be back from Gavin’s soon enough, and then we’ll all have to talk about what they discussed.”
“I’m sorry. I just… God, Abby. I don’t know what the hell to do. Everything’s fallen apart, and I just—I don’t know.” She hated herself for the faint tremor in her voice. “I think I freaked Joe out.”
Her sister didn’t bother to wipe away the tear that slid down her cheek. “How could you possibly have freaked him out?”
The answer wasn’t likely to please Abby, but at least it would distract her. “I might have propositioned him a little bit.”
Both of Abby’s eyebrows shot up. “And here, I thought you’d wait a while longer. What did he say? What’d he do?”
“Ran away.” Brynn rolled her eyes. “Okay, he kissed me first. But then he ran away, and we proceeded to pretend it never happened.”
“Mm-hmm.” Abby sighed and rubbed a hand over her forehead. “Brynn, if you’re serious about making the change, you should know that Joe won’t do it. He won’t be your Guide.”
She knew that, but she had no idea why Abby did. “We already talked about it. Joe said that Sam thinks Cindy would be good for me.”
Oddly, Abby laughed a little. “A woman. Of course. Conveniently solves the problem of having to watch you make it with another guy.”
“Uh, is there some unwritten rule I’m missing that I’d have to make it with my Guide if it was a guy? Because I asked that pretty specifically.”
“No, but it wouldn’t matter. Seeing you bound to another man would drive Joe up the wall, even if you weren’t sleeping with your Guide.”
Brynn couldn’t keep from frowning as she dropped her gaze to the puzzle pieces again. “I think he thinks that I’m too screwed up to get involved with. That the crap with Matthews unhinged my brain or something.”
“You think it unhinged mine,” Abby pointed out a bit uncharitably. “Listen, I’m going to tell you this, because no one else will. Joe had a bad Initiation. A really bad one.”
“Oh.” It explained a lot, even without knowing why it had gone so bad. “Did he…regret it? Because I
kind of got the feeling he did.”
Abby didn’t answer at first. Instead, she rose, unfolding her legs slowly. “Keith and Joe met in the army. They were out alone one weekend on some sort of field exercise. Something went wrong, and Keith got hurt. It was…bad.” A shudder wracked her. “He should have died. Would have, if he’d been human.”
“Joe found out what he was.” She’d guessed it had been something of the sort, but it didn’t answer the most important question. “So why did he make the choice to become a werewolf? Did something happen to him?”
“He met a woman. Here, in Red Rock.” Abby grimaced. “Tamara. He fell in love with her.”
“Oh.” Brynn watched her sister pace and tried to work through the implications. Joe had fallen in love. He’d made the choice to become a werewolf. His Initiation had gone badly. He didn’t serve as a Guide to women he was interested in.
He’s interested in me.
She could think of half a dozen reasons off the top of her head why Joe might feel the need to run from her, not even taking into consideration the fact that she’d all but told him he’d be nothing but an uncomplicated fuck. It had seemed like a good way to reassure him at the time, to make it clear that she wasn’t a damaged girl looking for a hero, but now it just sounded tawdry. Cheap. Insulting.
She braced her elbows on the table and dropped her face to her hands. “God. I sort of messed this up, didn’t I?”
Abby remained silent until Brynn looked up again. Then she nodded toward the kitchen. “I think we need a drink.”
“Yeah.” She dropped her hands back to the table and winced when the impact jarred her wrist. “Shit. This is not my week. Or month.”
“Right there with you.” Abby walked through the doorway and returned a few minutes later with a bottle of whiskey and two tumblers. “If it wasn’t for Keith, I’d have already lost my mind.”
“Then I’m glad you’ve got him. I am, Abby. I really like Keith.” I like that he’s going to take care of you, no matter what.
“He likes you too.” She poured a healthy splash of the liquor into each glass and handed one to Brynn. “But he’s worried about you and Joe.”