His to Defend (A BBW Paranormal Shifter Romance)

by Elena Aitken

  Tears clouded Nina’s vision, but still she looked out to the crowd to meet Ryker’s gaze. He was looking at her. But he looked distracted, too. His brother, if that’s who it was next to him, was once again muttering something in his ear. Ryker shook his head and looked down.

  Something was going on. She just didn’t know what.

  She couldn’t worry about it. Not right then. It was Harper’s turn.

  “Axel, the first time I saw you, you sparked a fire within me. I didn’t know then that that spark would ignite into a roaring inferno that I never want to extinguish. You have taught me what love can be and should be. Every day, you make me feel more loved than I ever thought possible. I vow to be your partner, the best mother I can be to your children, and grow our family by your side with love and strength. I love you unconditionally and without hesitation, accepting all that you are, and giving you all that I am.”

  There was no help for it; the tears spilled from Nina’s eyes, along with most in attendance. She wiped at her tears while Harper and Axel exchanged rings and the justice of the peace declared them husband and wife. A cheer went up among the crowd, and Nina turned to look for Ryker.

  He was gone. His seat, along with the one next to him, was empty. Her eyes moved to Natalia, who watched Nina with a blank expression.

  As soon as she made eye contact, Natalia shrugged and mouthed the words, “I’m sorry,” before she, too, got up and slipped away.

  What the…

  She couldn’t dwell on it, at least not for the moment, because Luke and Kade had each stepped forward to take one of her arms in each of theirs as they walked down the aisle after the happy couple.

  “What are you doing here, Liam?” The moment they were away from the ceremony, Ryker unleashed his barely controlled temper on his little brother. He’d slid into the seat next to him at the last minute before the ceremony had started. It didn’t take a genius to figure out that no good could come from Liam’s presence.

  Ryker had done his best not to disrupt the ceremony, because there was no doubt that was exactly what Liam wanted, but a man could only take so much. Which was why he’d grabbed his brother and yanked him out of there as soon as he could.

  “You know exactly why I’m here.” Liam smirked.

  It was a cocky look that had always driven Ryker crazy. He flexed his fist, itching to punch him in the mouth and wipe that smile right off his face.

  “I’m here to do what you obviously weren’t going to do. Or couldn’t,” he added.

  “You came to stop the wedding?”

  Liam shrugged. “That was the initial plan. Grandfather was pretty sure you weren’t going to get the job done.”

  “That’s bullshit.” Except that was exactly what had happened. In fact, Ryker had forgotten all about his initial mission and purpose of visiting the ridge. “And if that’s why you’re really here, why didn’t you do it?”

  “What’s the point?” He practically laughed. “They’re already mated and they have a watered-down half breed cub. What’s a stupid human wedding going to prove?”

  Ryker felt a flash of defensiveness toward his cousin and his new bride. Liam had no right to talk about Harper or her baby that way.

  Isn’t that exactly how he used to talk?

  “Besides.” Liam stepped toward him, his arms crossed over his chest. He was only slightly smaller than Ryker, but strong. Ryker knew exactly how strong Liam was. Worse, he knew that Liam’s lack of morals made him dangerous. Ryker might be a little rough around the edges, what many would call a hard man. But Liam was downright trouble. “I think we have bigger problems, don’t we, big brother?”

  “What are you talking about?”

  The smirk was back on Liam’s face. “I think you know exactly what I’m talking about. You and that human whore seem to have a little something—”

  Ryker silenced him with a solid connection of his fist to his brother’s jaw.

  Liam staggered backward but he stayed on his feet. His hand went to his mouth and when he pulled it away, there was blood on his fingers. “Is that all you got?”

  “Not even close.” Ryker stepped forward, ready to show his little brother exactly how much he had to give when it came to his mate. He’d teach the little bastard to ever speak out against Nina again. His bear roared as Ryker cocked his arm, ready to deliver another punch.

  “Hit a nerve, did I?” Liam’s words stopped him and instead of punching him, Ryker dove for his brother. He wrapped his arms around his waist and took him down to the ground, hard.

  Behind him in the distance, Ryker vaguely registered the cheering. The wedding must be over, the vows spoken. Nina was probably looking for him. Nina. With his brother on the ground beneath him, Ryker delivered another punch and then another.

  It didn’t take long for Liam to wiggle out from under him and deliver a few punches of his own. “Isn’t it bad enough that our cousins are all mated with weak partners? You had to go and do it too?”

  “Shut the hell up.” Ryker hit him hard in the stomach. “You don’t know what the hell you’re talking about.” The gasp of air that rushed from Liam’s lungs satisfied Ryker, but only for a moment as his brother recovered fast. Shifters healed quickly, making them equal partners in a fistfight that often went on far too long.

  “Right.” Liam got to his feet. “Only you didn’t just choose a weak little brown bear like Luke, did you? Or even a fragile fuckin’ bespectacled bear from God knows where.” He dodged Ryker’s fist and delivered a hit of his own as he continued. “Hell, even Axel chose a half breed, brother.”

  “Stop talking, brother. I’m warning you.”

  It was a warning that Liam didn’t heed. “You mated a human, brother. A fucking human. Do you even know what you’ve done?”

  Ryker’s vision went red as his bear lost control. He barely even felt the crunch of bone as he connected with his brother’s face again. He didn’t register as his brother fell to the ground and he dropped punch after punch to his head. It wasn’t until his sister’s voice cut through the fog that he slowed.

  “Ryker!” He felt her hands on his back. “Stop. You’re going to kill him.”

  He shook her off, but stood and took a few steps back from Liam. “No,” he said to Natalia. “I wouldn’t be so lucky. He’ll heal.”

  It was true. Liam was already healing. He’d be good as new in a few minutes and they all knew it.

  “What is wrong with you two?” Natalia aimed the question at Ryker, but it was Liam who answered.

  “He mated her, Nat.” Liam pulled himself to standing and wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. “Did you know?”

  Ryker looked to his sister, who nodded. “I knew.” Her voice was soft and sad. “But I’m pretty sure Nina doesn’t.”

  It was clear that the answer was evident in the guilt of Ryker’s expression.

  “Why?” Natalia asked Ryker. “Why did you do it? It wasn’t fair.”

  “Fair?” Liam laughed. It was an evil sound. “You mean she doesn’t even know what you are?” He shook his head. “You’re a bigger asshole than I thought.”

  He was an asshole. And he knew it. He never should have mated her. “I don’t know…I didn’t mean to…”

  “It’s not right, Ryker.” His sister’s voice was laced with concern and love.

  How was it possible that his siblings were so different? One so full of love. The other so full of hate. And then there was him.

  “I know,” he admitted. “But I don’t know what to do.” It pained him to say the words aloud because he knew in his heart what his sister was going to say. It was the same thing his brother was going to say. Even if they were coming from different places.

  “You can’t do this to her, Ryker.” Natalia stepped forward. She looked as if she were about to cry herself. “I know it’s terrible and heartbreaking and—”

  “Whatever,” Liam interrupted. “Stop with the sappy bullshit.” He crossed his arms over his chest and glared at Ryk
er. “You can’t be mated to a human and you damn well know it. Especially if you did it without consent. You’ve just broken about a dozen grizzly laws. It’s over, Ryker. And you already know it. The best thing you can do is just leave. There’s nothing here for you.”

  His brother’s words stung, but they were also true. And that’s why Liam was there.

  “Ryker?”

  He couldn’t look at his sister. There was nothing she could tell him that wouldn’t hurt. Instead, he turned and looked back toward the sound of the celebration. Axel and Harper’s celebration. They were celebrating their love and she wasn’t a full grizzly. They could do it.

  “It’s different,” Natalia said, as if she’d read his mind. “She knew. She had a choice. She’s—”

  “A bear,” he finished for her. “I know.”

  “Ryker, I wish it could be different. Nina, she—”

  “Don’t.” He held up his hand. He couldn’t hear any more because they were both right. He broke the code when he’d taken her as a mate, but more importantly, he’d broken her trust. Even if he could tell her who he really was and make her understand, she might never forgive him. And if she turned him away…well, that would hurt more than it already did. “Don’t say it. Please don’t say anything.” He shook his head and turned away. “Can you just tell her…” He trailed off, unsure as to what Natalia could possibly tell his mate—the woman he loved, the woman he knew he would die for—that could soften the blow of him leaving. Because she’d feel it too. He knew she would. It didn’t matter what she’d said, what they’d both said; what they had between them was more than a fling. Much more. It was forever. It was fated.

  But that didn’t matter because Natalia and Liam were right. Not only was it against the grizzly code, it just wasn’t right. It would be different if she’d accepted who he was and chosen him on her own. But he’d taken her.

  “Enough already.” Liam laughed. “Are you seriously going to moon on and on about this human woman? You fucked up, Ryker. And you know it. You can try to beat the shit out of me all you like. It won’t change anything.”

  He was right.

  And that pissed him off.

  He had to get out of there.

  Ryker’s bear roared. He turned away from his siblings and started running to the woods, shifting in the process. His clothes shredded all around him. But he didn’t care. All he cared about was the feeling of power that flowed through his veins as he let his animal take over. The pure adrenaline as he pushed his muscles harder and further than he ever had before, crashing through the trees.

  He didn’t know where he was going as long as it was far away from Nina and everything he’d screwed up.

  Nina promised herself she wouldn’t worry. She wouldn’t let herself get worked up or think anything of the fact that Ryker had never returned to the wedding after ditching out of the ceremony.

  But despite the promises she’d made to herself, she couldn’t help it.

  When, after the cocktail hour—complete with speeches from both Luke and Kade together and a short one from herself—Ryker still hadn’t shown up, her concern grew. Nina tried to track down Natalia to see what was going on, but she was nowhere to be found either. It wasn’t until the band started up and the dances began that Natalia reappeared.

  “Where’s Ryker?” She didn’t bother beating around the bush.

  “He left.”

  “I noticed.”

  For the first time, Natalia’s expression softened when she turned to look at Nina. “I’m sorry. I really am. He didn’t want to go. It was…”

  “It was what?” Panic and hurt and a flood of other feelings crashed through her. How could this be happening? She’d just found him. Just found someone she felt connected to, someone she thought she might actually love and…

  “It was a family emergency,” Natalia said. “Our brother Liam came and he had to go. He really did.”

  “Why didn’t you go?” Nina asked. Nothing made sense. “You’re family.”

  “It’s different.” Her smile was sad and she looked as though she wanted to say more, but after a moment, she pressed her lips together and nodded.

  Nina blinked hard and looked up to the sky. The sun was just starting to set and the stars would be out soon.

  She wouldn’t cry. She couldn’t let herself.

  “Can you tell me where he went?”

  Natalia shook her head.

  “His phone number? How I can reach him?” To her horror, she heard her voice crack. She would not cry. “Can you tell me anything, Natalia. Please?”

  The other woman glanced around and then finally looked back to Nina. “I can tell you that he didn’t want to go, Nina. If there was any other way, he would have taken it. Honestly.”

  “But I—”

  “He cares about you, Nina.” Natalia took her hand and squeezed gently. “I’ve never seen him look at another woman the way he looks at you. Just remember that, okay?”

  Nina shook her head gently. “I don’t understand.”

  “I know.” Natalia leaned forward and kissed her on the cheek. “I’m sorry.” A moment later, she was gone, disappearing into the crowd.

  Nina knew that even if she did track her down, she likely wouldn’t get any more information out of her.

  She straightened her shoulders and took a deep breath. She couldn’t fall apart. Not yet. It was Harper’s wedding and she would not ruin it. Not for anything. Not even if her own heart was breaking.

  She should have known better than to let her guard down and feel anything for Ryker. A fling. Just a bit of fun. That’s all it was supposed to be.

  If only she had listened to herself.

  Nina focused on the dance going on in front of her. Harper and Axel were swaying together to the music. A song about love and soul mates and all of the things that should have been making her heart dance with joy for herself and Ryker. No. She forced herself to focus on what was important. And it wasn’t her broken heart. She wouldn’t let it be.

  Thankfully, Bree provided the perfect distraction. “Hey there,” she said as she joined Nina at the edge of the dance floor, a man next to her. “Isn’t everything about this day perfect?”

  Nina forced a smile. “It really is. They are just…”

  “Perfect?”

  They both laughed.

  “They are,” the man next to Bree said. “Hi.” He reached over and extended his hand. “I’m Gabe Wilder.”

  “It’s nice to meet you.” Nina looked between the two. “Are you guys a…” She waved her finger between them.

  It was Bree who laughed first. “No. I mean, sorry, Gabe—no offense.”

  “None taken,” he said. “But no. We’re not together. Just friends. I’ve been in the area for a few years now and Bree was one of the first friendly faces I saw. Along with the Jacksons, of course.”

  “That’s because we’ve all managed to stay on the right side of the law,” Bree said with a laugh. “Gabe here is local law enforcement. He keeps the area safe, the troublemakers out, that kind of thing.”

  Troublemakers. Nina couldn’t help but think of Ryker’s brother. Was he a troublemaker? Obviously, considering whatever he’d said to Ryker had caused him to leave.

  She shook her head. No point bringing that up. Besides, the music had changed, and Harper and Axel were waving their hands, inviting everyone to join them out on the dance floor. Nina looked to Bree and Gabe. “What do you say we all go dancing?”

  Ryker ran hard and fast until every muscle in his body burned with the effort but still he didn’t feel any better. He shifted back to his human form as he got to the ridge. Naked, he sat and watched the sun set behind the mountain tops. His arms burned for Nina. To hold her in them, against his chest and share this memory with her.

  But he’d never share this memory with her. How could he? His brother may be an asshole, but he was right. He had nothing to offer Nina. He’d screwed up and he knew it. Maybe if she’d had a choice…but
she hadn’t.

  The best thing he could do now was get as far away from her as possible. The ridge wasn’t far enough. He could still feel her. Sense her, as if she were part of him.

  And maybe she was.

  They were mated. Fated.

  How foolish he’d been not to believe.

  Until now.

  Until it was too late.

  Distance would help. He had to get away.

  But first…

  Ryker turned in the direction of the Den and Nina. He’d lost all track of time. Darkness had fallen around him while he’d sat lost in his thoughts. The wedding would be wrapping up soon and then he’d go collect his camera and his other things and leave.

  A clean break. It was the only way.

  Only two hours later, when Ryker slipped back onto the property and into the tent that Luke had set him up with, he was no longer convinced that a clean break would be possible. The closer he’d gotten to the buildings, the stronger the pull was. It was a physical ache in every cell of his body. He couldn’t have ignored it for anything. The need to see Nina was intense and it took all the self-control he had to bypass the Den for the tent in the first place.

  But there was no trace of Nina in the tent. Hell, he himself hadn’t even spent a night there. He gathered the few things that were there, pulling on jeans, a T-shirt, and his boots, stuffing the rest of his things into his pack before standing outside, where he stared at the huge log building.

  Nina was inside.

  Ryker’s eyes went to the second floor and the little balcony that he knew was hers.

  Maybe a clean break was for the best, but even so, it wasn’t possible. He couldn’t leave without his camera.

  It was the excuse he told himself that convinced him to climb up the side of the building, using the logs as toeholds as he easily scaled the wall and heaved himself up on the small balcony. The sliding glass door was open a little and he peered inside.