The Ghost of Kathleen Murphy

by Vickie Carroll

  “Oh, so it’s going to be that way.”

  “Jed, why are you here?” She pushed his arms away and moved backward out of his reach.

  “To bring you home, of course. Why else would I have traveled thousands of miles during my busiest time of the year?”

  “Sorry to tell you this, Jed, but you have wasted your time and frequent flier miles.”

  “I think you might change your mind once you have heard me out. Will you do that for me? Will you at least listen to me, Cassie?”

  “Jed, there is nothing you can say…”

  “Just give me five minutes, Cassie. Not a lot to ask, is it?”

  “Five minutes then. Let’s go inside.”

  After they were seated and had placed their order Jed reached for her hand but she pulled it away.

  He shook his head, and his lips curved into a small confident smile she knew so well. It was the smile to assure everyone he always won. “Cassie, first let me say how sorry I am. I took advantage of you, your hard work, and your dedication. I didn’t appreciate you, and I know it now. I let you down in every way possible, and well, the fling with the girl meant nothing to me. I will have to live with my mistakes. I am here not only to ask your forgiveness, but to bring you back home with me as my partner—a partner in every way. I want you to marry me, Cassie, and half the company will belong to you. You can develop your own group of writers.”

  Cassie felt her face flush with anger. “Well, this is a surprise, and I won’t pretend it’s not. But you are too late, Jed. I don’t want to edit anymore; I want to write. I am writing now. I do forgive you, or at least I am sure I will eventually because this move has changed my life for the better. I feel like me again for the first time in a long time, or maybe ever.”

  It was Jed’s turn to be angry. “What are you talking about, Cassie? You badgered me for years to promote you and let you develop your own stable of writers, and now you want to throw it all away? What about me and you? You want to throw us away too?”

  “There is no us anymore, Jed. There never was really; it was always you and then whatever was left over you gave to me. This is true in every way in our relationship from business to personal. Think about it. If you are honest with yourself, you know I am speaking the truth.”

  Jed leaned back in his chair. “All I know is you are making a big mistake, a really big mistake, Cassie, and one you will live to regret.”

  “I’ll take the chance.”

  Jed shook his head in confusion and looked down at his watch. His dark hair always so perfect and in place, fell forward onto his forehead. It was the look Cassie had loved. He looked boyish and sweet. But looks can deceive. She had learned his practiced smiles and manufactured looks of concern and caring. His handsome face and polished exterior hid a strong determination to get what he wanted, no matter the cost to others. No one and nothing would ever be as important to Jed as himself and his own dreams.

  Their food arrived and they both ate in silence for a few minutes.

  “This silence is uncomfortable for both of us, and unnecessary, Jed. Let’s talk about your trip and have a civil meal.”

  “I don’t want to do small talk, Cassie.”

  She could tell he was trying to gauge her mood. He put his fork down and cleared his throat. “Look Cassie, the thing is, I miss you, and I know I was wrong in the way I handled things. I was crazy to let you go without a fight. I just want a second chance with you. We can make it work. I will do anything you want me to do. You can write, and you don’t have to work at all, with me, or in the business, I mean. I love you. I just didn’t know how much until you were gone.”

  These were words Cassie dreamed of hearing for years. But now it was if he were speaking to someone else. She felt like an observer watching a play.

  He leaned in close to her, his face only inches away, and put his hand on hers. For a moment Cassie remembered how she felt about him when they first met. She jumped in head first, buying Jed’s patter, his image, and she was convinced she found Mr. Right. He was handsome, successful, smart, and charming. He had been impossible to resist.

  Then a switch flipped in her brain, everything was clear, and the past fell away forever. “Jed, I can’t go backward. I’ve moved on and you can too. I’m sorry.” She pulled her hand from his and took a sip of tea. It was then she looked up and saw Jacob watching them through the window. She raised her hand to signal him to come in but he walked on.

  “Excuse me a second, Jed.” She ran to the door and out onto the sidewalk.

  “Cassie—what the hell?”

  She ran out the Tea Room door. “Jacob, Jacob, wait a minute.”

  Jacob stopped and did a slow turn and walked toward her. “Who is he Cassie?’

  “It’s Jed. I was going to tell you he was coming but I couldn’t reach you all day yesterday.”

  “I was with the lawyers all day and in the archives at the newspaper. I realized last night I had left my phone off. They are not allowed in the archives. The battery in the phone was dead as well. It was too late to try to call you when I got home last night.”

  “I was worried you changed your mind about going forward.”

  “How can you think that of me, Cassie? Do you still not know me?”

  “I didn’t want to think it Jacob, but when I couldn’t reach you I was afraid.”

  “Why is he here?”

  Jacob’s quick change of subject left her stammering for a reason. “Well, he just came; I mean he emailed me he was on the way. I didn’t know until the last minute.”

  “But why is he here?”

  “To apologize, to make things right between us, and to offer me a job and to take me back home.”

  “And are you going home—did you accept his apology?”

  “It’s my turn to ask if you don’t know me.”

  Cassie saw Jed coming through the Tea Room door and walking toward them. “Oh well, here he is now. I will introduce you.”

  Jed walked toward them, a puzzled look on his handsome face. “Cassie, what’s going on? Let’s finish our lunch and our conversation, please.”

  “Jed, sorry to run out on you, but I had to talk to Jacob. Jacob this is Jed, my, my former…”

  “Her fiancé, Jed Patterson.”

  Cassie turned back to Jacob. “My former boyfriend and boss.”

  “Hello Jed, I am Jacob, her current boyfriend, but not her boss at all.”

  Cassie’s stomach did a flip at those words, and she saw the look on Jed’s face go from surprise to anger.

  “Well, Cassie you are a quick worker, I must say. Will Jacob here support you while you pursue your fantasy of becoming a writer? Isn’t your writer fantasy the reason you are here?”

  “What Cassie and I plan to do is no business of yours; and I think you owe her an apology.” Jacob put his arm around her waist.

  Jed put his hands in his pocket. “I think I have done all the apologizing I care to do for one trip. If you will excuse me, I will pay the lunch tab and be on my way back to America. Goodbye, Cassie.”

  They watched him go back into the restaurant and Jacob took her hand. “Cassie, I am sorry. It was a stupid thing for me to do. I had no right to jump into your business. “

  “Well, a girl does like to get relationship confirmation before it is announced on the street.” She could only laugh at Jacob’s look of distress.

  “Again, I am sorry. I can go in and apologize to him if you like and you can finish your conversation.”

  “He and I are finished, Jacob. You just helped move things along for me. I have to thank you.”

  Jacob smiled and took her hand. “Well, then let’s make some plans and get on with our day. It’s turning out better than I hoped.”

  They went to his office in the bookstore. He closed the door behind them, and begun to prepare tea while they both recovered from their encounter with Jed. Cassie could tell Jacob wanted to ask her more about it, but he was holding back.

  “Jacob, it�
�s fine, you can ask me anything you want to ask about Jed. There need not be secrets between us, nothing we are afraid to say to each other now. I don’t like secrets, except in books.”

  “You have told me what I wanted to know. It is over with him. If I’m reading you correctly, you are at least considering staying here in Ireland. All good news as far as I’m concerned.” He kissed her on the lips and handed her the tea. They decided to spend the rest of the day site-seeing in the village and following Cassie’s agenda. There was no more talk about Jed or the future.

  When they returned to the bookstore, Jacob finished briefing her on what David, his lawyer friend, said about taking their evidence to the authorities to open an official investigation. Since the investigation would be from an old missing person’s case, it would be complicated not only by lack of witnesses, but lack of cooperation by the church. Now it was real. Someone outside their little group knew about it. They had concrete plans now and things would begin to happen. They decided the first thing they needed to do was to talk to April. The investigation would affect her current living arrangement, her relationship with Rose and Emily, and her job. Jacob also must talk to his aunt.

  Jacob looked at his notes from his meeting with David. “I’ve been advised to ask the owners in for a formal meeting but not without the authorities being present. In order to search the grounds, they will need approval from The Haven owners but also from the church as they still own the adjacent property. Remember, I too am on the list of potential investors in the land deal. The idea is to expand so the writers and artists’ community can grow. Though no money has yet changed hands.”

  Cassie was trying to follow it all. “Do things work the same here in Ireland as in the U.S.? Meaning, they must show cause to examine the evidence to make sure it is solid enough to actually serve a search warrant?”

  “Yes, it is very similar. They will be able to call in counsel, and I would assume it will be two different groups, one for the church and past monastery, and one for The Haven to get access to the archive and records still in the building.”

  Cassie tried to keep the fear out of her voice. “What is the next step?”

  “You go back and talk to April and see what she wants to do. We can wait a bit until your classes are over and those people go home, and to give April time to make her plans.”

  “The classes are over tomorrow, and they will be gone in two days, so that should give April enough time. I’ll go back now and talk to her before the dinner hour. We are supposed to have a dinner tonight for the students. Tomorrow is my last official class day. I have private meetings with a few who wanted some career advice the next day, followed by a quick lunch, and then my obligations are over for this class. In the original plan with Emily and Rose, I would now work with April to complete the monastery-archive work and have free time to write.”

  “You can move your things to my house as soon as the class is over. April is welcome there too if she needs some transition time. Cassie, let her know, please. I can also give her some work at the bookstore to help replace what she is losing from her job there,” Jacob said.

  “Oh, you are so kind to do that for her, and for me. April will be so happy. Though I have no idea what her long-term plan will be. I guess we’ll find out.”

  Jacob walked Cassie to her car and gave her a long kiss goodbye.

  “Call me later at the bookstore after you talk to April. Let me remind you, I now have to get home to feed the dog I have been crazy enough to take in.”

  Cassie’s mind was working overtime on the drive back. She put Jed out of her mind, but she was worried about April, and about her own issues. How would she transition her life to Ireland, when, and for how long? What about living with Jacob—and maybe marrying him someday? Maybe he didn’t want to ever marry again. Did he? Then she switched to thoughts of all the trouble they were about to cause everyone; and though she felt sorry, she was not sorry enough to stop. If she could do this for the girls and for Lydia, she would deal with the fallout she knew would come. Then, of course, there was the book she planned to write about all this, the book about Kathleen and Maeve. Through the ton of anxiety, she glimpsed something else—happiness. She realized she had never felt more focused and happy.

  Cassie parked her car in the Center’s garage. Today, she had purpose, and today she claimed her life as her own.

  Chapter 15

  Cassie took a deep breath and made her way to April’s room. Her door was open, and Cassie saw her sitting on her bed looking through papers. “Hi, April, what do you have there?”

  “Hi, come on in. I’m looking at class options for the next semester.”

  This sent a pain through Cassie’s heart. She was about to disrupt April’s life.

  April put her college material on the overcrowded table. “Cassie, sit down, have some tea, and tell me all about your meeting with Jed.”

  April listened, saying nothing, as Cassie told her about the Jed-Jacob confrontation, and brought her up to date on her conversation with Jacob and David. Cassie had saved the hard part for last. “April, consider what I’m going to tell you because it affects you. Jacob said David is set to go forward. They suggest we wait until our classes are done next week so you have time to make your plans. As you know, once this goes to the investigation stage, you and I will not be welcome here. You have another month or more of work here before you start classes. If you leave, you will lose that money, and the money you would have earned on holidays and breaks while in school going forward.”

  “I’ll be okay, Cassie. I knew this was coming and I want it as much as you do. Don’t worry about me.”

  “But I do worry, and I will worry. Jacob has offered his home to both of us. He may be able to give you some work to do in the bookstore to cover your loss of income for next month, and he’s sure he can use you to cover for his employees when they go on holidays and next summer as well. Also, and this is for sure, I want to hire you as a researcher and proof reader for my book. You can continue to stay with us at Jacob’s house or he can help you find a place.”

  April stood and walked to her window. “I am so grateful to you both, but I had rather find another place to stay so I’m not in your way at his house. I mean, well the two of you…”

  “April, the house is plenty big enough and we will be doing our own things, so don’t worry about it right now. Just plan to pack up and move with me when we decide to go. This is not a problem.”

  “I can do that.” April’s shoulders relaxed with relief.

  “And guess what?”

  “You and Jacob are going to marry!”

  “Oh my, April, romantic you—jumping ahead even faster than I do. Well, maybe one day, way down the road. Let’s just see how things go. They are going pretty fast so I think we all need to slow down a bit.”

  “I am sure things will work out for the two you. I knew it when I saw you together the first day you met. He is your soul mate. Oh, Cassie, I am so happy for you.”

  “I would love to put all this behind us and concentrate on just being happy to be with Jacob and the fun of starting a new life, but this is all part of it.”

  “So much has changed since you arrived, Cassie. I will never forget this adventure as long as I live.”

  “I expect a lot of people will remember this. I just hope we are not hated by the community for getting the church back in the press, if that happens.”

  “Maybe years ago it would have been the case, but not today. Once people find out what happened, we will be vindicated.”

  “Let’s distract ourselves for a bit and talk of fun things and go for a quick walk outside before dinner.”

  They linked arms and went out the side door. And though they both seemed to lean toward the direction of the cemetery, neither made a real effort in that direction. Instead of talking about Kathleen and Maeve, they talked of the possibilities and challenges Cassie would face moving to Ireland permanently, until they heard the dinner bells. Cassie f
elt a bit guilty sitting with some of the staff while knowing what was to come. She especially felt bad about Jacob’s aunt, who seemed to be missing tonight.

  After dinner there was dessert in the community room for the class attendees, and several of them got up to talk about their time there. One of the workshop attendees expressed an interest in pursuing a religious vocation, so she asked questions about what happened to the former monastery there. Rose referred her to the local Catholic Church. Cassie and April exchanged looks. Just as Rose got up to close the evening with a few words about the next day, a shrill scream rang out from the hallway above them. Emily held up her hand for everyone to remain in place, and then left to investigate. Rose stayed to calm the others and the visitors. Cassie looked at April, who appeared ready to run. She reached for April’s hand and held it tight. “It’s okay, don’t worry.”

  Emily came back down and whispered something to Rose who then stood and spoke to the group. “Bernadette had a bad dream, and all is well. I wish you a good evening and look forward to seeing you all at breakfast tomorrow.”

  Everyone seemed a bit reluctant to leave the room but eventually it cleared out. Cassie and April left last hoping Bernadette would come down, or they could find out more about what really happened. The bad dream story sounded a bit farfetched.

  Cassie called Jacob and told him April was in agreement with the plan and wanted to go forward. It was then decided he would ask his lawyer friend, David, to go to the authorities the day after the classes ended. That gave them four days to prepare to exit and to figure out what to say to Emily and Rose. Now, with the decision made to go forward, they were relieved, but it was going to be difficult to decide how and when to leave. They tossed around a few ideas and thought about just leaving with a written note of little explanation, but they ruled it out as being cowardly. Waiting to be tossed out later didn’t seem very smart, however. Cassie didn’t want to slink away as if she was ashamed or afraid, but she didn’t want to give advance notice to give anyone time to move records, or worse, destroy them. She decided she would go head and give Jacob all her copies and notes, and get those out of the archives before they lost their access to the information. She made plans to meet him at his house for dinner the following evening to talk it through. April agreed to go along with whatever they decided to say and do.