Eternal Choice: (The Cursed Series, Book 2)

by Kara Leigh Miller

  Jaxon: WE REALLY NEED TO TALK.

  I glared at my phone screen as if he could magically see me and know I didn’t want to hear from him.

  Me: WHY? GOT MORE LIES TO TELL ME?

  My hands trembled with growing anger, and I set my phone on the desk before I became tempted to throw it across the room. Grabbing a stack of pictures from the box, I placed one face down on the scanner and hit the button.

  My phone buzzed and vibrated across the desk. Once. Twice. Three times… I rolled my eyes and snatched my phone.

  Jaxon: I’M SORRY I LIED TO YOU.

  Jaxon: THIS WHOLE THING IS A LOT MORE COMPLICATED THAN YOU REALIZE.

  Jaxon: PLEASE, CHLOE. I NEED TO TALK TO YOU ABOUT THIS.

  I sighed, my shoulders slumping. Considering Trent had completely ignored me when I mentioned his brother, and I was always so rattled when I was near him, to the point I couldn’t think clearly, Jaxon might be my only option to get any answers.

  Me: FINE. BOOKSTORE. WEDNESDAY. 4:30.

  Then I turned off my phone.

  CHAPTER FIFTEEN:

  Field Trip

  WEDNESDAY AFTERNOON, I FOUND MYSELF SITTING on the couch in the alcove of the bookstore waiting for Jaxon. Normally, he was here before me, but apparently, he was running late. I scrolled through social media on my phone to pass the time when a message appeared.

  Jaxon: MEET ME OUTSIDE.

  I twisted around to see if he was here and messing with me, but the same handful of people that had been here when I arrived were still in their respective spots.

  Me: WHY?

  Jaxon: LOL. TRUST ME.

  I snorted. Trust him? Yeah, right.

  Jaxon: NOW GET OUTSIDE!

  Sighing, I gathered my backpack, flung it over my shoulder, and then walked outside. A flashy red sports car idled near the curb, and Jaxon stood near the open passenger’s door. He was dressed in jeans, a long-sleeved polo shirt, and sunglasses. The breath rushed from my lungs when I realized he looked even more like Trent than he had before.

  “C’mon. Get in.” He grinned and nodded toward the car.

  I stayed exactly where I was. “Why?”

  He laughed. “Because we’re going on a field trip.”

  I stared at him. Was he serious? But the excitement in his expression told me he was very serious. I chewed nervously on the inside of my cheek. Larissa expected me to stay at the bookstore. She’d be livid if she found out I took off. Not to mention, I suspected she made Declan hang around and wait for me. If he was lurking right now, he’d see me leave, and he would not hesitate to rat me out.

  Jaxon sighed. “Come on. I promise to have you back in time for you to get home.”

  “A field trip? Seriously?”

  “Yup. Figured we could both stand to get out of that stuffy bookstore for a little while. We deserve a break, don’t we?” He once again nodded at the open car door. “So? Are you coming or not?”

  This was probably a terrible idea, but he was right. I really couldn’t stand to spend another afternoon cooped up in that bookstore, especially when I planned to interrogate him until he told me the truth about what was going on. That was probably a conversation better had in private. Without another thought, I climbed into his car. He shut the door, then slid in behind the steering wheel.

  “Where are we going?” I asked as I hooked my seat belt.

  “It’s a surprise.”

  He sped away from the curb so fast, I was pushed back against my seat. Great—he was a lunatic driver. I knew this was a mistake.

  “Yeah, well, I hate surprises,” I said.

  The déjà vu hit hard and fast—nothing more than a flash, a brief second of having that conversation before. I shook my head, refusing to let whatever was happening to me ruin whatever Jaxon had planned.

  “Are you going to tell me why we’re going on a field trip?” I asked.

  “They were always my favorite part of school, so I figured they’d be my favorite part of tutoring, too.” He shrugged. “Besides, I need some fresh air.”

  “Were?” I asked, brow raised. “Aren’t you still in school?”

  “No,” he said. He didn’t say anything further after that, and half an hour later, he pulled into an empty parking lot. I glanced at him. He got out, and I followed, both curious and cautious. And then a lighthouse came into view.

  “Can we go inside?” I asked. I’d never been in a lighthouse before.

  “Yup.”

  I smiled. We walked the short distance to the lighthouse.

  The ocean stretched in front of me, the sounds of waves crashing against the shore filling our silence. Seagulls swooped in and out of the sky with shrill squawks before settling in clusters on the ground.

  Jaxon held open the lighthouse door, and I stepped inside. There were two small couches with a rickety table between them. In the center was a narrow, spiral staircase that led straight to the top, and I didn’t hesitate to climb the steps. Jaxon was right behind me.

  When I got to the top, my breath caught. “Wow,” I whispered. “This view is incredible.”

  “I knew you’d like it here.” He stopped beside me for a moment, then said, “Wait until you see this.” He opened a small door and motioned for me to go first.

  When I stepped through the doorway, I was in a smaller round room with yet another door that led to a balcony.

  “This is a rotunda,” Jaxon said, moving around me to swing open the door. “And directly above our heads is the lantern room.”

  I turned to him and grinned. “Look at you… studying and stuff.”

  He flung his head back and laughed. “Let’s not make that a habit.” He ushered me outside.

  I leaned against the balcony and gazed at the ocean. From here, I could see endless water, dotted here and there with small islands. Boats and yachts were nothing more than tiny specks. The enormity of what lay spread in front of me was overwhelming, yet it was peaceful, too.

  “So, what’s the newest drama?” Jaxon rested his arms on the balcony and stared straight ahead.

  “We’re not doing this today,” I said with a hard shake of my head. “You owe me an explanation.”

  “I know.” He momentarily hung his head. “But humor me for a minute, okay? What’s new with you and Trent?”

  “Not much.” I sighed. Maybe if I played along, he’d finally tell me what was going on. Besides, who better to gather information from about Trent than his very own brother?

  “When the whole volleyball thing happened, he made sure I was all right, and then he tried to kiss me,” I said.

  Jaxon shifted his body so he was facing me. His expression was unreadable. “Did you let him?”

  I shook my head. “No. I mean, I wanted to, but we were at Simon’s house and—”

  “Simon’s already called dibs on you,” he finished for me.

  “Yeah, something like that, I guess.”

  Though, if his recent text canceling our plans on Saturday was any indication, he no longer wanted dibs. I wanted to feel bad about that, but the only emotion I could muster was relief.

  I was silent for a moment longer, debating how much I should tell Jaxon. He was a great listener, and his advice wasn’t terrible. But… something about talking to him about other guys was weird, especially when one of those guys was his brother.

  “Anyway, at school yesterday, he asked me to hang out this weekend,” I said, opting to leave out all the details about Trent finding me in the hallway and insisting I’d wanted to kiss him. For all I knew, Trent had already told him about that.

  “And?” Jaxon’s voice was calm and soothing.

  “Nothing. I completely blanked, and then he got mad and walked away.” I frowned.

  Guilt gnawed at me. I really should have given him an answer, even if it was to say no. But that was my problem—I didn’t want to tell Trent no.

  “To make it worse, he knows Simon asked me to hang out on Saturday.” I groaned and hung my head.

  “
Tell me more about Trent.”

  That was an odd thing for him to say, but then again, Jaxon was always saying things that surprised me. “Why?” I asked, quickly tiring of his questions. “He’s your brother. I’m guessing you know a lot more about him than I do.”

  Jaxon chuckled. “You’re probably right about that, but I need to know how you feel about him.”

  I narrowed my eyes. He needed to know? I’d go along with this for a little bit longer, but then I was going to make him tell me what he knew.

  “I like him, which is weird because I barely know him, but remember when I told you Simon didn’t give me that spark?” I asked.

  Jaxon nodded.

  “Trent does. Big time.” I laughed with disbelief. “It’s like I just know when he’s close. I don’t even need to see him to know he’s there, and whenever he is nearby, my body reacts in ways I can’t even begin to describe.”

  Thinking about it now caused a shiver to wiggle down my back.

  “And no one else has made you feel that spark?” Jaxon asked.

  “No.”

  Jaxon was unnaturally silent, and I risked a glance at him. He once again had his arms braced on the railing, his gaze trained on the ocean. Why wasn’t he saying anything? He always had something to say, some advice to give or some snarky comment to make.

  “Want my advice?” he said after what felt like hours. Though he still didn’t look at me.

  “Yes, please,” I said a little too eagerly.

  “I think you need to give Trent a chance.”

  My jaw dropped. “What?”

  I had to have misheard him. Why on earth would he tell me to give Trent a chance? Was this why Jaxon responded to my ad—so he could encourage me to go out with his brother? But… Jaxon had contacted me before I ever saw Trent.

  “You said you wanted to kiss him, and he gives you that spark. You obviously like him, right?” he asked.

  I had a feeling he wasn’t really expecting an answer, but I gave him one anyway. “Yeah, I do,” I said.

  Though I couldn’t explain why. Other than an intense physical attraction to him, there wasn’t really anything between us. I had more of a personal connection with Jaxon than I did with Trent right now.

  “Then give him a chance. Hang out with him this weekend. See what happens,” Jaxon said.

  We fell silent, and I contemplated his advice. The thought of hanging out with Trent this weekend—uninterrupted—was exciting. It was also terrifying. What if, despite the insane pull I felt toward him, we had nothing in common? What if we didn’t actually like each other? Or what if we liked each other a lot and things went too far?

  No matter what, I knew if I spent more time with him, I was going to be hit with more déjà vu, and I wasn’t sure I wanted to deal with that. I was always left feeling disoriented and exhausted.

  Maybe that’s exactly why I should see Trent this weekend, if for no other reason than to get some answers. Was he experiencing the same things I was? Did he have the same reactions to me that I had to him?

  “Do you believe in déjà vu?” I asked.

  Finally, Jaxon looked at me. “Déjà vu?”

  I nodded. “Every time I’m near Trent, I have these… episodes.” I turned so my back was to the ocean, and I leaned against the railing. “They’re like memories, but I don’t actually remember the things that are happening.”

  Jaxon remained stoic. Then, he shook his head and glanced away, resuming his position against the railing. “So, these episodes you have… what kinds of things are you remembering?”

  “Small stuff. Being at the waterfall back home with a guy. Holding hands. Riding in a truck.” I squinted, trying to recall more of the things I’d seen, but my thoughts were fuzzy. “It’s more feelings than actual events.”

  Jaxon fell silent again. He wasn’t acting like his normal self today, and that had unease curling in my stomach. It was time to stop avoiding it.

  “Enough about me. It’s your turn,” I said. “So, start talking.” I stared at him, unflinching, but he stood frozen, barely acknowledging me. Impatience burned through me, shredding my ability to keep quiet. I opened my mouth to speak, but he beat me to it.

  “Do you truly believe you know Trent?” he asked, turning slowly to face me. “Deep down. Do you think you have some type of connection with him?”

  “Yes,” I said without hesitation.

  My quick answer surprised me. I’d been trying so hard to make sense of it all, and with a couple simple questions, Jaxon managed to pull the truth from me. I didn’t know how, but I knew clear to the depths of my soul that Trent wasn’t just some stranger.

  “Do I know him?” I asked, my voice barely above a whisper.

  Jaxon’s nod was infinitesimal, but I hadn’t missed it. All the air was sucked from my lungs, and I slouched against the railing. My mind raced, but my thoughts were an incoherent mess.

  “How?” I asked.

  “I can’t tell you that,” Jaxon said.

  “Do I know you, too?” I forced myself to meet his gaze, and I wished I hadn’t.

  His blue eyes were dark and stormy, as if having this conversation was the most painful thing he’d ever had to do.

  “Not as well as you know Trent,” he said after a moment.

  I nodded even though I didn’t really understand a word he was saying. “Why don’t I remember either of you?” I asked.

  Blowing out a breath, he once again turned away from me. “I can’t tell you that, either,” he said.

  “Then what are we even doing here?” I asked and threw my hands in the air with frustration. “If you weren’t planning to tell me anything helpful, why did you insist on meeting today? Why beg me to talk to you when you’re not even talking?”

  “It’s complicated, Chloe,” he said, hanging his head. “Believe me, I want to tell you, but I can’t. Not yet.”

  “Not yet?” I crossed my arms. “Then when?”

  He shrugged.

  Talking to him was as productive as beating my head against a brick wall. I was clearly wasting my time.

  “Fine,” I said. “If you can’t tell me how I know you and Trent or why I can’t remember either of you, at least tell me why you’re here. Why did you answer my ad? Why have you been pretending to be my friend?”

  “I’m not pretending,” he snapped, then his expression softened. “I am your friend, Chloe, and that’s exactly why I’m here. You don’t know it yet, but you’re going to need a friend, someone who can help you through what’s going on.”

  “Newsflash, Jaxon. I have a friend,” I said, anger sparking in my chest.

  “Who?” He straightened to his full height. “Simon?” He snorted with disgust.

  I gave him a dirty look. “Whatever,” I said, exasperated. “If you’re not going to tell me anything useful, just take me back to the bookstore.”

  And I was going to demand Trent give me the answers Jaxon wouldn’t. One way or another, I was going to find out the truth.

  CHAPTER SIXTEEN:

  Answer Me!

  I DUMPED A STACK OF PICTURES into the box and replaced the lid. One box down, twelve more to go. This was the definition of a never-ending job. Yawning, I rubbed at my eyes.

  I spent most of last night in the office, scanning pictures. Around 3:00 a.m., I crashed, but Little Frank running through the house screeching at 7:00 a.m. woke me up. I’d been hiding in the office ever since.

  Hefting another box toward me, I flipped off the lid and groaned. I grabbed a handful of photos and set them on the desk. My stomach rumbled, but I ignored it.

  Socializing with Dad, Larissa, and Little Frank was at the very bottom of my “That Sounds Fun” list, despite their insistence I attend some Memorial Day event with them. I’d adamantly refused, and eventually, they left me alone. Thank God.

  Placing the first photo on the scanner, I pressed the button and glanced around the room.

  There were dozens of framed photographs on the walls. Dad with b
usiness associates. Dad and Larissa at various places—the beach, fancy dinners, museums, and vacations.

  And, of course, there were pictures of Little Frank. I smiled. He was a cute kid, even if he was annoying. I’d never had a sibling before, and while I wasn’t exactly getting close to my brother, I did love him.

  Every day since I’d gotten here, I prayed Dad wouldn’t do to Little Frank what he’d done to me. That boy needed a father. I needed a father. All I’ve ever wanted was a family—a real family that loved and supported each other. I wanted the family movie nights and the stupid family arguments. I wanted all of it.

  I’d had a glimpse of that with Aunt Beth and Uncle Dean, but like everything else in my life, it had been mercilessly ripped away from me.

  Melancholy settled over me. All my friends in Keene Valley were living their lives, seemingly unaffected by my absence. Not that I expected them to put their lives on hold simply because I wasn’t there, but it was hard not to feel left out.

  I could have it all again. Right here. With Dad and Larissa. God knew she was trying so hard, and I kept pushing her away. Maybe if I embraced my life here…

  I did kinda have Simon in my life now, so I wasn’t completely lonely. He’d texted late last night to apologize for canceling our plans and asked if we could reschedule. Hearing from him had calmed me. Maybe he wasn’t blowing me off after all.

  If I was honest with myself, things here weren’t horrible. They could always be worse. Like Mom always told me: Life is as good as you make it, Chloe, so spend every day making it great.

  Still, no matter how comfortable things were getting here, I couldn’t shake the soul-deep need to get home. One way or another, my days in Malibu were numbered. And now that Jaxon and Trent were in my life—in some twisted bizarre way for reasons that I still didn’t understand—I was more eager than ever to get home. I wanted no part of them and whatever game they were playing.

  TUESDAY MORNING, I RUMMAGED through my locker. Everything inside of me hummed to life. I slowly straightened and turned around.

  Trent stood a few feet away, his gaze trained on me. He was alone, too, so it was now or never. My heart thundered in my chest and ears. I swung my locker door closed, shoved my books into my backpack, flung it over my shoulder, and marched toward him.