She sucks in a shaky breath, her eyes wide. “Kane-”
“Save it.” I rub the back of my neck where all the tension sits like a heavy stone. “I’ve had a long, shitty day. Funny thing is, I couldn’t wait to come home to see you. But I should have figured you’d find something to sabotage what we have.” I walk away, but toss one last truth over my shoulder. “You always do.”
Chapter 23
Brynne
Kane storms towards his bedroom, and even though I want nothing more than to follow him, I don’t move.
Can’t.
I wince as the door slams behind him.
Every one of his harsh words burns through me. I’ve allowed my fears and insecurities to destroy the trust he’s been so careful to build between us.
This whole time, it’s been him who’s tried to make this work.
“You’re an idiot,” I mumble to myself, picking up my phone and deleting the link Felix sent me.
I was upset about my exhibit being cancelled. Angry at Felix. But once again, I directed that frustration towards Kane.
Fix it. I shake my head. I’ve never been good at apologies. But I know I owe him one.
I knock on his bedroom door and wait, but there’s no answer.
That scared, insecure little girl inside me demands that I walk away. But if I do, I may never have the courage to say what’s eating at me.
“Kane.” I try the handle. It’s unlocked. I open the door, but he’s not in bed.
I can hear the shower in his bathroom.
The thought of Kane wet and naked does all sorts of things to my body. Sex would be an easy way out. A way to apologize without having to say the damn words.
“Coward,” I mutter. And I am. I’ve always been with him.
Pulling my bottom lip between my teeth, I bite hard, and take a deep breath before walking into the large bathroom. That same breath gets stuck in my throat when I see him behind the glass wall, his muscles bunching and rippling with every small movement.
Water cascades down his sculpted back, and his dark hair is plastered against his forehead. Both palms are pressed against the wall in front of him, and I can hear him muttering something incoherent through the hiss of water.
His eyes are closed, his features pulled tight in frustration. He slams his fist against the tiles.
I jump slightly. Maybe this wasn’t a good idea.
But just when I’m about to make my escape, his eyes open, his gaze latching on to mine.
Frozen. Like an animal trapped in a predator’s gaze. That’s how I feel as he slowly turns off the water and opens the glass door.
He grabs a towel and wraps it around his waist, his hard, blue eyes never leaving mine.
“Well?” He raises a dark eyebrow at me. “You come to accuse me of something else?”
“No.” I swallow, unable to resist dragging my gaze down his torso, watching how the small droplets of water slide across his smooth skin.
“Brynne?” He growls my name.
“Yeah?” I jerk my eyes back to his.
He’s smirking now. But there’s nothing nice about it. Just a knowing twitch of his lips. He takes a step towards me and his towel slides free. He does nothing to stop it from falling, nothing to hide the growing erection between his legs.
“Is this what you came in here for?” His words are clipped despite the hunger beneath them.
“No.” I shake my head, but the word sounds more like a whimper.
He sneers and takes another step toward me. “You sure?”
“I don’t want to fight with you.”
“Could’ve fooled me.” Another step, and he’s a breath away.
My fingers curl into fists beside me, resisting the temptation to touch him.
“You’re going to drive me insane, you know that?” He reaches out and drags his knuckles across my cheek.
I tremble and close my eyes.
His touch. It’s the purest thing in the world. But my heart is so corrupted that I haven’t been able to see it.
“I’m sorry,” I whisper. “You’re right.”
He stills.
I open my eyes and find him staring at me.
One eye twitches, before he asks, “About what?”
“Everything.”
“You’re going to have to be a bit more specific, sweetheart, if you’re wanting to make this a real apology.”
“You’re not going to make this easy on me, are you?”
He exhales through his nose, lips tightening, his hand cupping the back of my neck, fingers tangling in my hair, and growls out one word. “No.”
I sigh. “I haven’t been fair to you.”
He grunts.
“And you’re right. I do…care.”
A small smile tugs at his lips, but there’s that damn sadness still lingering in his eyes. “Wish that was enough.”
“It’s all I have right now.”
“Bullshit.” He untangles his fingers and drops his hand to his side. “It’s all you’re willing to give.”
“Maybe.”
He shakes his head and crosses his arms. “I want more.”
“I know.”
I’m not a touchy person. Never have been. And I’m definitely not a mushy one. But right now, my heart feels all sorts of things I know I shouldn’t.
Or maybe it should.
I’ve been fighting him so damn long, and all it’s brought is heartache.
“What do you want?” I ask.
His nostrils flare. “Your trust.”
I give a small nod. “Okay.”
He gives me a skeptical look.
“What else?”
“Let’s just start with that for now.”
A part of me sags because I want him to ask for more. I want him to demand it. It may be the only way I can give it to him.
He moves past me, walking back into the bedroom, and pulls out a pair of jogging pants from a drawer and puts them on.
I watch him. Every movement. He’s so familiar to me, and yet there’s still this huge gulf between us.
“Do you want to tell me about her?”
He looks at me, rubs the back of his neck and shrugs. “Her name’s Kiley. She’s my half-sister. Was born when I was put into foster care, so I didn’t know about her. She showed up less than a year ago. Didn’t believe her at first. By the time I realized she was telling the truth, she’d taken off.”
“But she’s back now?”
“Staying with Blake. She got into some…trouble.”
“What kind of trouble?”
“Trouble I didn’t want you having to deal with…again.”
“Oh.” I sit down on the edge of the bed. “Why didn’t you tell me about her?”
He exhales heavily. “Because I don’t know what kind of shit she’s messed up in. And I don’t want her around you and Noah. Especially not after everything with…”
“Sam.”
“Yeah.”
“Trying to protect me,” I mutter.
“Always,” is his muffled reply.
My heart pounds in my chest, aching with an emotion I don’t want to name.
I stand and walk towards him, reaching up and placing my palms on his chest.
He doesn’t move. Just watches me.
“No more,” I say, standing on tiptoes and brushing my mouth against his.
“No more what?” He still doesn’t touch me. Our lust is thick and heavy between us. But it’s so much more than that. It’s a connection I’ve been too scared to admit.
“No more protecting me.” I press against him, feeling his cock strain against his pants.
“Can’t help it. Made a promise.” His words are strained as I kiss his jaw, his neck, his collarbone.
“If we’re going to do this, then I need to know you’re being honest with me. That you’re not keeping things from me, even if it’s for my protection.”
He sighs. “I won’t lie to you, Brynne.”
My fingers
skim over his chest, down each sculpted ab.
He captures my wrists. “But I will always protect you. Always, Brynne.”
I try to swallow, but it feels like there’s something lodged in my throat.
“I…” Love you.
Damn. Why are those three words so hard to say?
His lips twitch up slightly, and he places my hands around his neck. “You what?”
I love you and it scares me more than anything ever has.
Pressing against him, I whisper against his lips. “I want to finish what we started this morning.”
He runs his hands down my back, his heavy erection against my stomach. “And I want you in my bed. Every night. That’s my condition.”
I raise my eyebrows at him. “Already making demands?”
He nips at my bottom lip, then scoops me up. “Yes.”
A heartbeat later, my back is pressed firmly against the mattress and his hulking form hovers above me.
Everything between us has always been tense, volatile, but there’s none of that in his eyes right now. What I see makes my chest ache.
Acceptance. That’s one thing he’s always given me.
Love. I’ve tried so hard to deny it, but it’s there, blazing in the blue depths.
But it’s the possessiveness, an almost primal look of ownership that makes me tremble.
“I-”
“No more talking,” he growls out, crushing his lips against mine.
His kiss is wild. Feral.
He moves between my legs, his hips pressed against mine, and I wiggle beneath him, moaning with the friction against my already pulsing clit.
I want this.
Him.
Always have.
Slowly, he undresses me. His fingers are hard, callused, and deliciously rough against my sensitive skin.
“So beautiful,” he murmurs, taking his time, kissing every inch of my body.
I half expect, half hope for him to take me hard and fast. With all the tension that has simmered between us for so long, I wouldn’t have blamed him. What I don’t expect is the way he watches me, as his fingers, his mouth, his tongue dance across my skin.
My hips arch upwards as he slips a finger inside me and his tongue licks across my folds.
“Kane,” I say softly, breathlessly.
His mouth devours me. He sucks and licks at my swollen clit until I’m moaning for more. For all of him.
I plunge my fingers into his still damp hair, and pull slightly. “Kane, please.”
Blue eyes meet mine, and he grins, before giving one last lick that makes my entire body quiver.
“Please, what?” He crawls up my body, wedging himself between my thighs. “What do you want, Brynne?”
He’s going to make me say it.
“You,” I admit.
His lips twitch up, and he places his palms beside my shoulders, holding himself above me, the swollen crest of his cock teasing my entrance.
I grip his hips, my nails digging into his skin as I wiggle beneath him.
“Then you accept my terms?” He lifts an eyebrow.
He wants me here. In his bed. Every night.
I want it, too.
“Yes.”
His mouth is back on mine. And I feel some of that steel-like self-control of his slipping.
“Good,” he groans against my lips.
I wrap my legs around his waist and angle my hips, begging with my body to feel him fill me.
“Are you on the pill?” he asks.
I can’t help but chuckle.
“What?” He arches a dark brow.
“Probably something we should have thought about last time.”
He nips at my bottom lip. “Last time, I wasn’t thinking.”
“And you are now?” It’s meant to be a tease, but his expression is serious.
“I’m thinking about a lot of things.”
I tremble, but this time not from his touch. From the promises and expectations in his eyes. And I see it - our future.
“I’m on the pill,” I say breathlessly.
He doesn’t hesitate. He thrusts into me with one hard move and I cry out, taking every inch of him, his thick cock stretching and filling me completely.
And I know there’s no denying that he owns every piece of me.
My heart.
My mind.
My tattered soul.
It’s all his.
He lets out a long breath, holding himself above me, before he starts to move.
“I love you,” he growls against my mouth, between kissing me. “So damn much.”
I moan and my head falls back, eyes closed, taking in every feeling, every emotion, like it’s the first time.
“Kane,” I pant his name, each delicious thrust sending me closer to the edge.
He consumes me, the inferno between us building.
“Come with me, Brynne,” he growls out, holding my gaze.
I can’t hold back. My body trembles and shakes. White flashes of light blind my vision, and I cry out his name, digging my nails into his shoulders as I ride every wave of pleasure.
He drives into me one last time, burying himself to the hilt as he spills himself inside of me.
I keep my legs wrapped around him, holding him there.
Our bodies are damp with sweat. He’s heavy, but I love his weight on top of me. I run my fingers over his stomach, watching the muscles ripple under my touch.
We lay in silence, and heavy breaths are the only sound between us.
“You’re everything,” he mumbles against my hair.
I trace the dark patterns of the tattoos on his arm.
I love you, my heart beats, begging me to say those three simple words. To give him the confirmation that I’m his.
But he already knows it. And I’m grateful he doesn’t demand the words.
“I talked with Coach today,” he says, his voice heavy with sleep.
“And?” I twist in his arms, so that my chin is on his chest. “Are we going to be apartment shopping in Toronto?”
He chuckles. “I don’t think he hates me that much.”
“I’m sorry you had to deal with him alone. I shouldn’t have…”
“Two apologies in one night. That must be a record.” He quirks an eyebrow at me.
I slap his chest lightly. “And you’ll never hear another one from me again if you make a big deal about it.”
“Fair enough.” He tucks my hair behind my ear. “Actually, he wasn’t as upset as I thought he’d be. He was hurt, but-”
“Hurt? What right does he have-” I try to move away, but he pins me with his heavy arm.
“He’s your father. And you didn’t tell him you had a kid.”
“You’re defending him?”
“I’m just saying I can understand how he feels.”
I grunt, wiggling to get away, but he doesn’t let me.
“My bed.” He presses his lips against my forehead. “You promised. Be pissed at me, but don’t run away.”
I relax slightly, although I’m still frustrated that he would take my father’s side.
“He loves you, Brynne.”
I shrug. “He loves you more. You and that damn team. Always has.”
“You’re wrong.”
“I’m not.”
He growls against my ear. “Do you always have to have the last word?”
“Yes.” I smile up at him, grinning.
He sighs, holding me tighter. “You’re a pain in the ass, you know that?”
“Yeah, but you love me.” The words are out of my mouth before I even realize what I’m saying.
His gaze narrows, his expression hard and serious. “Yeah. I do.”
I swallow hard. “Kane…”
I love you, too.
The words stick in my throat.
“I…”
“One day.” He presses his lips against my forehead. “I’m going to ask you to marry me.”
“Kane-”
> “Don’t worry, sweetheart. It’s not tonight. I won’t ask you again until I know you’re ready. But one day you will say yes.”
I don’t respond, because if I do, I know I’ll probably beg him to ask me now.
But he’s right. I’m not ready. I don’t know if I’ll ever be.
I never wanted any of this.
The thought of marriage. Kids. Playing house. It was never my dream. My dream was to paint. To create. To be my own person. Not to be a hockey wife. And with Kane, that’s what I’ll be.
Chapter 24
Kane
Brynne mumbles in her sleep, one arm strung possessively over my chest, a leg looped around mine.
It’s still dark outside, but I can already hear Noah starting to stir through the monitor.
I hate getting out of bed, hate leaving her, but we were up half the night, and I want to let her sleep. Carefully, I shift out of bed, then pull the covers over her shoulders.
After I change and feed Noah, I wrap him in a blanket, take him out on the balcony, and watch the sun rise over the city.
“One step closer, buddy. She still won’t admit that she loves me. But she does.”
Noah babbles his response and I grin down at him.
Never thought I wanted to be a dad. But him. He’s perfect. My heart swells with pride, and I want nothing more than to tell everyone he’s mine.
I’m done with the pretenses.
“And we’re going to have to do something about that damn birth certificate,” I mutter. “Because you will have my name. You’re a Madden.”
“Ma, ma, ma,” he jabbers.
“Close,” I chuckle, then say slowly. “Ma-dden.”
“Da, da, da.”
I chuckle. “Yeah, I’m your daddy.”
I wonder if all babies are as smart as him. I doubt it. But I could just be suffering from what Blake calls Daddy-fever, the belief that everything your kid does is a world event that deserves media coverage.
We used to laugh at the guys who came in with their videos and pictures, but I get it now. I don’t want to miss a moment with him. And if I could record every second of his precious life, I would.
“Hi,” Brynne says, closing the balcony door behind her as she steps out. She’s wearing one of my oversized t-shirts, her face clean of make-up, her dark hair tangled, and I swear she’s never looked more beautiful.
Second Shot: A Men With Wood Novel Page 13