by B. D. Gates
"Oh, god, Dr. Biggs, I'm so sorry," I said from the ground.
Dr. Biggs looked down at me. The concern was etched in her usually-smiling face. "Baxter, we'll be fine, we'll all be fine, you just do what Tess tells you to do."
Tess looked up at the umpire.
"Go get the medics, tell them to leave the stretcher, but to come out here, and we'll walk her off."
The umpire nodded, walked over to the EMTs, watching from the field gate. The Pride was standing on the rail, wondering what the hell was going on, who was 'Bishop,' and who was this woman practically sitting on Baxter, holding her down?
Penny knew the answer to two of those questions, but she didn't say a word as she looked on.
The EMTs and the umpire had walked back to home plate. Tess stood up, stated her name and badge number, told them to flank me and walk me off the field, into the ambulance. They all looked at each other.
"I need you to do this. Now!" demanded Detective Hayes.
That set the two young men into motion. They took me by my arms and helped me to my feet. There was a smattering of applause from the crowd in the stands as I stood up.
"Okay," said Tess, scanning the spectators, looking for anything out of the ordinary. "Let's go."
The EMTs flanked me, Tess brought up the rear, her hand on the butt of her gun, followed by Coach Biggs and the umpire, who was now asking Coach to put in a designated hitter. The crowd once again began applauding as we walked off the field.
We made it to the gate with no issues, the Pride clapping, calling out to me as we walked past. I pitched the batting helmet towards the dugout, locked eyes with Penny, who watched us, wide-eyed, as we went through the gate. The EMTs helped me up into the back of the ambulance, Tess standing by, and I took a seat on the bench next to the stretcher. They were about to close the doors as Penny ran towards us.
"Baxter?"
I looked at Tess. "Could you give us a minute?"
Tess shook her head.
"Tess, come on." She heard me, clearly, knowing that I was really demanding it more than asking.
"Okay, but make it quick."
Penny climbed into the cabin, took a seat on the bench opposite me. Tess closed the doors.
Penny looked at me. "Bax, what's going on?"
I shook my head. I still couldn't tell her. I had very little time at all, so I wanted to tell her what I really needed her to know.
"Penny, I have to go. I...I don't know what's going to happen now. I want you to know how much you mean to me, I know what you've done, how much you've done for me."
"Oh, Baxter, no, don't leave, not now, please..." her eyes were filling with tears.
I put my arms around her, kissed her, quickly, on the mouth.
"Baxter..." she whispered. She kissed me in turn.
"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry," I whispered, my eyes tearful as well. "It may have been just for 'fun' to start with, but it really became something more, you became so much more, Penny."
"Baxter..."
"Shhh, it's okay, Penny, it's okay."
"It's not okay, Baxter, it's not, stop saying that," she whispered, tearfully.
She threw her arms around my shoulders and hugged me tight.
"Take me with you, Bax, please, I want to go with you," she said quietly, into my ear.
"You can't. I don't know what's about to happen, but I do know what could happen, and I'm not letting you get into this."
There were two quick taps on the back of the ambulance. I gently squeezed Penny close to me once more, kissed her, gently, then let her go. She stood up, wiping her eyes and face as she walked to the door. She was turned away from me, but I still heard her quiet words.
"I love you, Baxter."
The door opened and I watched as she jumped down and walked back towards the field, then looked away as Tess peered in at me before she closed me in.
A few seconds later, I heard Tess talking to the driver, giving him instructions, and the rig pulled away. Her car fell in behind us and we traveled for a few minutes, pulling over on a quiet side street. The cabin side door opened and Tess walked me to the back seat of her car, put me in.
51
"Keep your head down."
We took off in one direction, the ambulance in another.
"Tess, you said they dug up my grave?"
"The Program gave you a funeral, part of your 'dead' scenario. Someone must have wanted to be sure, so they dug it up and opened your coffin, which, of course, was empty. That happened yesterday. The Program got this info earlier today, they just let me know about it twenty minutes ago. Whoever dug up your grave has a head start on us."
"But we don't even know if they know where to start looking."
"Well, see, now, Bishop, here's the thing. A picture of you, playing ball, found it's way into a regional magazine and that picture, in turn, was picked up by an online digest last week and put into its weekly review." Tess passed her phone to me over the seat. "If it's not there, just give it a minute. That review, with that particular picture as one of it's covers, has been in rotation on an very popular online start page for the past three days, where it's been seen by millions of people. So, if anyone recognized you, well, they know you play for the Pride, and a little research will tell them where you are."
I watched the 'lead' photos change on Tess' phone.
Damn.
There I was, plain as day. Luckily, our team shirts didn't have our last names on the back or they'd have had that, too. Penny's winning picture had started the ball rolling. I had pushed Penny, that fateful night on the dock, into submitting that photo to the magazine.
This was my fault.
"So, how did a picture of you, when you're supposed to be hiding from people who want to kill you, when you're supposed to be dead, get into a damn magazine?"
"Tess, does that matter, now?" I answered from the back seat, looking up at her in the rear view mirror. "It got in, that's all that matters, I screwed up, this is my fault, okay?"
And that's where we left that. But Tess had more questions.
We stopped at the carriage house long enough for me to grab some clothes, pack a bag, before we headed back out.
"Who's going to look after the girls?" I'd asked, as I petted them.
"Don't worry about them, I'll get Whyte and Fowler to check on them and feed them every day. Since it seemed to upset you so, that I had one, do you mind if I give them a copy of your key?"
I rolled my eyes, but she couldn't see. "No, Tess, I don't mind."
Tess continued filling me in, sitting in the living room while I packed.
"According to an undercover officer who's inside the organization, there's some guy named Krieger coming for you. Apparently, he's the one that tried to...thought he'd killed you...the first time. Who's he?"
Okay. So. Now was the time.
Time to tell Tess everything.
"Krieger was my partner."
"Your partner." She was quiet for a few seconds. "Like, 'partner-in-crime?' Or like...so I'm not misunderstanding...but you're gay, Bishop. 'As Christmas.'"
"Tess, Krieger was my partner. He's dirty. And I'm a cop. Well, I was. With the Baltimore Police Department."
There was no response to that. After a few seconds, I looked around the door jamb. Tess was sitting very still, her eyes were closed.
"Tess?"
"You're a police officer?" she whispered.
"Yeah. Well, was," I answered very quietly, still looking at her. I stood in the doorway, feeling a very distinct change in the atmosphere.
She started shaking her head, slowly, her eyes still closed. "I am trying so hard not to hate you right now," she hissed.
I stood still. Waited.
Her voice rose. "You're a police officer! Tess was suddenly on her feet pacing the living room, arms crossed, storming. "It all makes sense now. It all makes sense! The things you've said, why your gun permit was allowed. You're a police officer! Do you have any idea, any idea, how impor
tant knowing that would have been to me? What a difference it would have made? Oh my god, Bishop! You really are an asshole!"
"Tess, I'm sorry."
"Yeah, you are." She stopped, looked at me. "What is wrong with you? Why the hell didn't you tell me?"
"Tess, I was going to, the day you ripped me a new one for not 'sucking it up', not dealing with my circumstances, but, well, I didn't, and then, later, I just...let it go. It wasn't important any more."
"That information is, was, would have been important, Bishop. To me. It would have made a difference to me," Tess replied, angrily, loudly. "How could you think that it didn't? That it wouldn't?"
I didn't understand her anger.
"Just what would it have changed, Tess? Tell me. Is it because I'm not a criminal? Because that didn't seem to matter after a while, did it? Would my having a badge really have made that much of a difference to you?"
I was getting angry and my voice rose with my anger. "Because I don't have one anymore. I did the 'honorable thing' and I lost my badge, I lost my identity. Don't you get it? From the minute the Program took me over, I wasn't 'Bishop' anymore. I wasn't a cop anymore. I wasn't supposed to be. The only reason I held on to 'Bishop' was because that's who I was to you. And when you left, I became 'Lisa Baxter' completely, because her life--her life was so much better than mine. You were right, Tess, you were so right about the 'do-over.' I was happy being 'Baxter,' more than I'd ever been as 'Bishop,' except...except when I was with you. So I let Bishop go. For good. When you left. And I don't think my having a badge would have changed that."
I went back to packing. When I had everything I needed, I threw the bag over my shoulder, moved into the living room. Tess was standing at the window, looking out. I leaned down, petted Rosie and Sophie goodbye.
"You guys take care of each other, okay? Be good girls, and I'll see you soon, okay?" They knew I was leaving, they always knew, when I had the duffel. I petted them again, then straightened up, looked at Tess. She had watched me say goodbye to the girls, but she wouldn't look at me.
"Let's go." I turned, walked out through the kitchen, snapping on the small lamp on the counter as I went by. "Tell the boys to leave the light on for them, they don't like the dark."
Tess went through the open door as I put my key in the deadbolt. "I love you, my good girls." I petted them, one last time, as Rosie grumbled at me, as Sophie nervously licked her lips, slowly wagged her tail. I scratched Smokey's neck as I passed him sitting on the porch railing, then walked out the gate, threw my bag into the back seat and got in next to it, closed the door. Tess, having already started the engine, put it in 'drive' and we pulled off. I looked at my girls standing at the gate, watching me go, as we drove away.
Tess hadn't said a word since I'd fired back at her. She glanced at me in her rear view, once, but only once, as she drove us to the next safe house.
52
Tess knew where she was taking me, had already planned it long ago if there was ever an attempt on my life while I recovered in the carriage house. The ride only took about ten minutes. We pulled into a driveway, rolling up under a carport that put us at a side door. She let me out of the back seat and I looked around. The house was an older red brick and wood ranch, well-cared for, sitting on a low incline above the street, in an average residential neighborhood. Tess unlocked the back door with a key on her ring, then led the way into a small kitchen with a breakfast nook that looked out into a nice-sized backyard. A stuffed bear was seated at the kitchen table and I suddenly realized that I was in Tess' house.
"This is yours," I said.
"Yes. Make yourself at home. Mi casa, su casa."
I looked around. It was nice, comfortable. A little bigger than I was used to, but I'd been living in a one bedroom, one bath carriage house for months. Of course, more people had lived here, once, and that would have certainly made it more cozy and warm. I carried my duffel into the living room and took a look down the hall, getting a feel for the layout. Standard ranch, living areas on one end, bedrooms on the other.
"Three bedrooms?"
"Yeah, and two baths."
Tess pulled out her phone and called her captain, filling him in on the facts, that she had me, we were at her previously-designated safe house, and that she was waiting to hear from the handlers at Witness Protection about our "next step."
I was not going to be living in Tenley any more.
I'd had that thought in the ambulance but had ignored it, not wanting to give it any consideration because of what having to move, to go 'on the run' truly meant. I didn't want to leave Tenley and all that came with it, so I'd just rejected that possibility outright.
I got a little shaky with the reality of my situation and had to sit down.
I made my way over to the couch and took a seat, then doubled over, trying to catch my breath. Tess, who had finished her call in the kitchen, came into the living room.
"Are you okay?"
I nodded, sat up.
One look, and Tess was by my side, her cool hand on the back of my neck, pushing me back down.
"You're not okay. You're white as a sheet. Is it your head, are you in pain?"
I'd forgotten I'd taken a fastball in the game.
"No, I'm not hurt, I just realized..."
Tess waited, her hand still on my neck, but only lightly now. I took some deep breaths while I was down there.
"I just...realized that...I'm leaving. That I'm not going to be living here anymore."
Tess didn't say anything.
And I had no say in the matter, not really. Once again, just like all those other times so long ago, I was being shipped off to 'somewhere else.'
We sat quietly, not speaking, both of us lost in our own thoughts. Tess was pensive, her face giving her away. She got up, walked out to the kitchen, left me sitting alone.
I heard the tap running, the splash of the water deployed to cover her crying, but I still heard her soft sobs. After a minute or so, the water stopped and I heard her rummaging in the fridge, in drawers, followed by the sound of eggs being cracked open, whisked.
I got up and walked to the doorway. I watched as she whipped those eggs into frothy submission.
"Tess, what are you doing?"
"You've still got to eat, it's getting late, and we might have to leave on a moment's notice."
"Yeah, uhm, I'm really not hungry."
"Well, neither am I, but still..." She wouldn't look at me, look in my direction, as she went about the business of cooking my supper. She poured the eggs into the frying pan, dropped two pieces of bread in the toaster on the counter. I didn't argue with her, certainly wouldn't, about something as insignificant as this. I watched her stir the stiffening eggs.
"Just sit down at the table, please, Bishop," her back to me.
I sat, taking the bear's place, holding it in my lap like a child.
Tess dished the eggs onto two plates, added the now-toasted and buttered slices to each serving and brought it to the table. She returned with silverware and napkins, dealing them out to each of us.
"What do you want to drink?"
"What have you got?"
Tess opened the fridge and looked inside. "Water and beer."
Definitely not water with eggs.
"Beer."
She grabbed two and cracked the tops, handing me one. I took a long, long pull on the bottle. She watched, a little amazed.
"Thirsty?"
I shook my head. I was looking to kill the pain. One beer was not going to do it, though.
"Do you have more?" I asked.
"A six-pack."
"That'll do," I said, before I killed the rest of the bottle and handed it back.
"Bishop." She stopped herself. Handed me hers, then got another one. She sat down at the table with me, saw the bear on my lap and smiled in spite of herself.
"Well, that's a sight," she said.
I imagine it was.
We ate the eggs and toast, Tess apologizing for
not having any tomatoes to add to them, recalling my first real attempt at having her eat dinner with me. I reminded her that it wasn't the first time she'd cooked scrambled eggs for me. The memory left a sad smile on her face.
"You know, if you'd told me you were a police officer from the start," she said, without animosity, not finishing the thought.
I nodded. "There are a few things we should have told each other sooner," I replied, just as quietly, recalling our breakfast at the animal hospital.
Tess looked at me, studied my face. The drive here, and my pending transfer had cooled off both of us.
We finished supper and Tess washed up the plates and pan while I worked on my third beer. The numbness was settling in, and I let it. When she was through, we moved into the living room, me sitting on one end of the couch, she on the other. Tess turned on the TV, but I wasn't paying attention, it was just background noise as I sipped from the bottle, letting the beer do its work. I tried not to think of anything, but it was impossible. I closed my eyes, seeing Penny, Biggs, the team, the carriage house, my girls and Smokey.
"Tess, you have to do something for me," I said, my eyes still closed.
The TV sound turned off.
"What, Bishop?"
I kept my eyes closed. I couldn't look at her right now, didn't want to see her react to my request.
"I'd like you to take the girls and Smokey."
"What?"
"I want you to have them. I'm giving them to you."
"Bishop, don't worry, we'll send them along when you get settled in your new life."
"Tess, I don't want to have to worry about them. What's happening right now, this may be just the start of my having to pick up and run. Or maybe Krieger will show up at my door and hurt them, or worse. I know that you'll take care of them. They love you, you know. Even Smokey. They'll be safe with you. They won't be left alone...if I...if anything happens. Tess, please."
She understood what I was saying. Completely.
"Okay, Bishop, okay, I'll take your crew for you. But when this mess gets cleared up, you just send word, and I'll get them to you if I have to bring them myself."