by Cindy Miles
He was right about that. I looked skeptically at Brax’s bike. I knew who it belonged to. I’d seen Brax riding Olivia around on it before. “It looks dangerous.”
Kane stood back, held his arms out, and shrugged. “Do I?”
I tapped my chin. “Hmm. Let’s see. Leather jacket. Check. Rugged jeans. Check. Rugged boots. Check. Slightly scruffy jaw. Check.” I inspected him further. “Smoky eyes that make my knees all wobbly.”
“Check?” he grinned. “Point made. But you know I’m not.” He dipped his head. “So come on already. Looks can be deceiving and you know it.”
“Go on, Harper,” Olivia said, as she and Brax joined us in the lot by his apartment. “It’s really a lot of fun.”
I quirked a brow. “That’s coming from a girl who likes getting thrown from a horse.”
Brax burst out laughing. “She gotcha there, Gracie.”
Olivia smiled. “It’ll give you a valid opportunity to hold onto his muscular stomach.”
I slipped a glance at Kane. He wagged his brows. I sighed and smiled. “Okay, okay. I’ll do it.”
Kane clapped his hands together. “Let’s go!”
Brax leaned close, speaking words only meant for Kane, and Olivia pulled me aside. “He really likes you, you know,” she said softly. “I’ve seen a change in him since meeting you. I can’t explain it, really. He’s always pretty even-keeled.” She smiled. “Just…changed. Like he’s been searching for something and has finally found it.”
I met her gaze; knowing, wise, a lot like Kane. “For me, too.”
Her smile widened, pulling at the scar on her lip. “That’s good to hear.” She sighed. “I know you have family, but you’re more than welcome to come spend Christmas with us. We’d love to have you.”
That familiar ping of uncertainty, of fear, of absolute dread that was so easy to ignore when fun and Kane and kisses stood in front of it, hit me in the stomach. “Thank you, really,” I answered. “But yes, I’ll be going to my family’s.”
She nodded. “You know to call if you ever change your mind?”
I smiled. “I do. Thank you.”
“All right Ms. Belle,” Kane’s voice sounded beside me. “Time to ride out.”
I blew out a nervous breath, walked over to the bike. “Whatever you say.”
Kane straddled the seat, bracing the bike with his muscular legs. Brax helped me on. His strange eyes found mine, and by his brusque attitude I could tell he still wasn’t liking Kane seeing me. “Don’t lean against the turn, and don’t try to stand and shift on the pegs.” He reached down, grasped both of my arms and circled them around Kane’s waist. His blue eyes stood in stark contrast to his scarred face. “Hold on, lean with Kane.” He tapped my nose. “You’ll love it. Promise.” He helped me into my helmet, tucked my chin strap, bumped fists with his brother, and Kane started the engine. It rumbled beneath my backside, a tingling feeling that made me want to laugh out loud.
With a wave, Kane took off, and I tightened my arms around him, snuggling my hands beneath his leather jacket. The ridges of his abdomen pressed like stone against my palms, and I was intrigued by his body. How it might look without a shirt or a jacket on. Nothing but skin and muscle.
Daylight sat at the edge of dusk; it looked wintry out, with the sky streaked with gray and white and darker gray and ginger, and the trees now barren of leaves. We drove along, toward Covington, and I still had no idea where Kane was taking me. At the moment, I didn’t care. This was fun! I liked how the sun dappled through the trees and flashed against my face shield, and I found myself wanting to go faster, faster. The bike rumbled beneath me. The wind whipped at me. And Kane’s warmth seeped into mine as I hugged him close. I watched the scenery pass by, cars, trees, farmhouses, as though on an old-fashioned movie reel. It seemed…surreal. As though I was peering into someone else’s life. A life where monsters and grandmothers and dead parents didn’t exist. I liked this life. I wanted to keep it.
We’d just reached the next town past Covington, a small little two-horse town called Manna. The sun had dropped, the sky had grown darker, and the temperature had grown colder. Kane pulled into a tiny gas station; empty, save the two pumps on the side of the brick building. Knocking the kickstand with his boot, he propped the bike and raised his shield. “Gotta fill up the tank. Be right back,” he promised, and I sat there and waited. I waited for what seemed like a long, long time. A big truck roared past, then slowed and backed up. It pulled in behind the station. The owners, maybe? The engine shut off, and I sat and waited on Kane to return from paying for the gas. What was taking so long?
I looked around me, at the single lane road running past the little gas station that sat on a bluff. Then I heard shouts coming from somewhere close. Behind the station, maybe? The voices grew louder, and I worried something might be wrong. I threw my leg over the bike’s seat and slowly walked toward the station’s entrance. The voices grew louder; I thought I heard Kane’s. Peeking inside the gas station, I saw no one there except the clerk. A college aged guy, maybe my age. He spared me a quick glance, then a nod, before he went back to whatever he was doing by the register. Kane wasn’t inside the station. Where could he be?
Confused, I eased out the door, and the voices caught my attention again.
“No goddamn Yankee’s gonna take my fuckin’ money,” a gruff, older male’s voice rose in anger. “You fuckin’ hear me? I’ll take that fuckin’ jacket, too, bitch! And that bike!”
“Yeah, you fuckin’ rigged them numbers, boy,” another man’s voice accused. “You might fuck those pussies at the frat house over, but we ain’t frat boys!”
Grunts. More swears. More than one voice. More like, four. Oh, God, Kane was in trouble from those stupid bets he was running. Fear for Kane propelled me to step closer, look down the embankment of pine needles. There, in the creek. A shirtless, white body, clad only in jeans and boots. Dark hair.
My insides froze as fear stabbed me. Kane was getting a beating. A bad one. He was down, and every time he’d try to rise, another would kick him in the ribs.
“Stop it!” I suddenly yelled, and my cracked voice shot out over the creek bed. “I’m calling the police right now!”
“Go fuckin’ shut her up, will ya?” one said.
“Get out of here, Harper!” Kane growled and surged to his feet then, threw his bare arms around the one closest to him, the one headed toward me, and dragged him down to the ground. In seconds, Kane had straddled him, and his fist was pounding into the stranger. Another guy headed straight for me; older, not a student. None of them looked like students. I turned and ran into the store.
“Hurry, lock the door!” I yelled, and the kid surprisingly jumped up and did just that. “Do you have a cell phone?” I’d left mine at Brax’s.
As he locked the door, he handed me his phone. I paused. If I called the cops, Kane might get arrested. Quickly, I dialed my own number. It rang. Rang. I prayed someone would pick it up and answer it.
“Hello?” It was Olivia.
“Olivia! It’s Harper! I’m just outside of Covington at a gas station. Some guys—they’re beating Kane bad.” I looked at the store’s door, and the guy had gone. “I didn’t call the cops. Please tell Brax to hurry!”
“Okay, stay away from them, Harper! Brax will be there as soon as he can.” She hung up, and I handed the phone back.
When I went to the door, the truck was speeding out of the store’s lot. I watched it crest the hill and disappear. Brax’s bike was just where I’d left it. They hadn’t stolen it after all.
Then I twisted the lock and took off outside.
“Should I call the cops?” the guy asked behind me.
“No! No, don’t! Please,” I begged. I ran. Skidded down the embankment in my heeled boots. Kane was lying in the creek bed; motionless, half on his side. I stumbled until I was next to him. The shadows had grown long, so long I could barely see. But I could, though. I could see enough. And what I saw made me cringe. Made my he
art beat faster.
My hand went to his arm. It was cold, and I gave it a shake. “Kane?”
A low groan escaped his throat. I sighed with relief.
And then my eyes inspected him for injuries. His ribs were red where he’d been kicked. His face was already turning purple, his lip was cut, and his knuckles were raw and bleeding.
Then, I saw his back. And I couldn’t help the sharp intake of air as I gasped in shock. Disbelief.
I nearly fell backwards. It felt as though I’d been punched in the stomach.
Just as I reached for him, for the puckered skin across his shoulder blades, his eyes fluttered open.
“Don’t,” he said hoarsely. “Please, Harper, don’t.” He pushed up on his elbows, fell back down.
It was done, though. I’d already seen what he didn’t want me to. Another of Kane’s secrets.
I reached for his face instead, and those profound coffee eyes regarded me. Filled with pain. With shame. With Fear.
“Sorry,” he mumbled, then coughed. “They came out of nowhere. I’m so sorry,” he grunted. “No cops, Harper. Please.” He pushed up again, fell.
“Shh, no cops,” I crooned. “I only called Brax. He’s on his way.” I smoothed his hair from his eyes. He was shivering now, his bare skin lying in the two inches of cold creek water. I took my black wool coat off, draped it across him, but he pushed up. This time, he made it out of the creek. I helped him up, and he leaned on me, but I could feel his sagging weight. “I think you need medical attention, Kane—”
“No,” he said. “I’m okay.” He wheezed that last part, and I didn’t think he was okay at all. My coat barely draped across his broad shoulders, but I held it there, covering his back best I could. When he looked at me, he looked with his entire soul. He said nothing. His eyes screamed. I just laid my head against his shoulder, holding him as steady as I could.
The sound of a rumbling motor roared close by, and at first, I thought the men who’d attacked Kane had returned. Fear froze my insides, and my gaze shot around the creek bed. Then doors slammed, and Brax’s distinct voice called out.
“Harper! Kane!” he yelled.
“We’re down here!” I yelled back, and in moments, Brax appeared. Another big guy was with him. Cory Maxwell, his friend and another Silverbacks baseball player. They both skidded down the bluff. Brax’s face was drawn in worry, in anger; frightening, terrifying.
“I got this, Harper,” Brax said, and he and Cory grabbed Kane by the arms and helped him back up the embankment.
My coat slipped off. My eyes darted to Kane’s back, and my stomach nose-dived again as though I’d been punched. Seeing it once had been enough. Seeing it again was even worse than the first time.
Cut into Kane’s skin, in what couldn’t have been done without incredible pain involved, was the word Stupid.
It was at that moment when I felt like my life hadn’t been quite as bad as I’d once thought.
Olivia sat beside me on Brax’s sofa, waiting. Brax was in the bedroom, out of sight, wrapping Kane’s ribs with tape; something Kane had apparently taught Brax growing up in foster care. Every so often I’d hear the hiss of pain pushing past Kane’s lips. Olivia grasped my hands, already clenched together in my lap.
“Brax will take good care of him,” she said. “He won’t let anything happen to him.”
I nodded, and couldn’t help but wonder if Olivia knew what I knew. What was inscribed by either a knife blade or some other sharp object, into Kane’s back. Purplish-pink and puckered, it glared from his otherwise pale, flawless skin.
Stupid.
Who would’ve done something so horrible?
Heavy footsteps fell toward us, and Brax lumbered up to the sofa. His face was grave, but those strange blue eyes looked kindly down at me. I rose, but he placed his big hand on my shoulder. “He’s sleeping right now, Harper,” he said.
“I know,” I answered, and looked toward the bedroom. The door was cracked, but I couldn’t see anything. “Maybe I can just sit by him?”
“Actually,” Brax said. “I need to talk to you.”
I met his odd gaze. “All right.” I sat back down.
“I’m going to make some hot tea,” Olivia said, rising. “Harper?”
I shook my head, and she offered me a smile and moved across the studio, to the sink. Brax sat down beside me, his muscular forearms resting on his big thighs.
“Kane and me, we learned things the hard way growin’ up. I met him in a pretty decent foster home. Nice people. But the good ones never last.” He looked at me. “We were split up after that, but stayed in the same district.” He smiled. “Kane was always lookin’ out for me, and would beat the holy fuck out of any wise ass who tried to bother me.” He ducked his head, much in the same gesture Kane did with me, and captured my gaze. “To this day, I’d die for him. But, to this day there are things I still don’t know. About his past.” He clasped his hands together. “I know he had a little sister, younger than me. Used to take her beatings for her. That was his real dad who did that shit to his back.” He rubbed his head with his hand. “I don’t know much else, other than the prick is in prison.”
I drank it all in, every horrible word. Guilt rushed over me, for ever feeling sorry for myself. I wanted to go to him, so badly. But Brax kept me beside him.
“See, I don’t know why Kane stays in the numbers,” he continued. “He’s wicked smart. But I do know one thing about my brother,” he said, and I looked at Brax Jenkins then. Waited. “He’s strong. And he’s honorable. And when he’s got your back, he’s got it for life.” He cocked his head. “So what I’m sayin’ is, he’s got your back. Make sure you have his, too.”
My heart was in my throat. I couldn’t say anything. Only breathe. Soak in every word. Every unbelievable word.
“Give him some time, Harper. For you to see his scars? It might seem like something small to you, or to anyone. But it’s not. He’s ashamed of them, and he’d have done anything to keep you from seeing them.”
I nodded, understanding. “He doesn’t want to see me, does he?”
Brax’s strong hand grasped my shoulder and squeezed. “It’s not you, sweetheart. It’s something he’s got to deal with. Let him. It’s shitty, I know—but it’s just our way.” He leaned close. “You know, us Southie boys do things a little different.”
He tried to lighten my mood, but it didn’t really work. “I know,” I replied, and part of me did understand. I rose, and turned to Kane’s brother. “Thanks, Brax,” I said quietly. “Please…let me know if I can do anything. And tell him,” I looked up, into Brax’s startling eyes, and words failed me, “that I’m thinking of him.”
Brax’s face relaxed as he smiled, and it was like some magical transformation. Harsh turned to handsome. No wonder Olivia had fallen so hard for him. “You know I will, half-pint.”
Olivia walked me outside, and darkness shrouded us both. She’d pulled a red slouchy beanie over her head, and her long sun-kissed braid hung loose and messy over her shoulder. The yard light beamed around her like a halo.
“I’m sure he’ll come around, Harper,” she said. “Those two.” She shook her head. “Their stories are unbelievable. The ones they share, anyway.” She sighed. “I’m sure there are some things they’ll always keep to themselves. It’s a rough life they led.”
I nodded. I didn’t know what to say.
She smiled and hugged me, and I was so stunned that I didn’t even flinch. “There are a lot of us who’ve had things happen that we’d rather forget,” she said against my hair, then looked at me. “I’m here if you need a friend,” she said sweetly.
“Thank you, Olivia,” I returned.
And I left.
I laid in my bed that night, my mind filled with the drastic events of the day. The brutality of Kane’s anger as he’d surged up and attacked had stunned me. I knew he’d been capable. He was just…always so gentle, so soft spoken. So in control. It was a shock to see him pound into someone
with such fury.
I had cheered him on, though. I’d wanted him to beat the hell out of those guys. The way it’d taken three men to finally put Kane down? There was physical strength, yes, but it also took mental strength to get back up after a beating like that.
In my mind’s eye, the ragged letters cut into his back anchored there, and no matter what else I tried thinking about, that came to the forefront. I don’t know why I needed to know more, but I did. Brax didn’t even know all the details. What made me think I ever would?
The next evening, I called a meeting with the Deltas.
“Ladies,” I began. Back at the podium, usually tucked neatly against the wall in the corner of the common room, I once again gripped the wood with my palms. “After giving careful thought, I feel that I was perhaps too hasty for vengeance with the Kappas and their Dare.” I glanced at the sisters. “I won’t beat around the bush,” I continued. “I feel the need to call off our Dare.”
Several questioning what?’s filled the common room, so I continued.
“Morally, it’s just not right,” I urged. “We as Deltas are better than that, aren’t we?”
“Well, what about teaching the Kappas a lesson?” Anna Conners called out. Her voice was edgy and frustrated, and I could tell she was not on board with my decision.
“The best lesson is to set by example,” I encouraged. Several groans, mostly from the younger sisters, filled the room. I continued. “Sure, the Kappas might laugh at us. And they probably will continue to exploit their Dare victims. But we aren’t responsible for their reformation. Or their punishment.” I looked out over the crowd, catching several sisters’ gazes. “It’s not right to play with someone’s emotions, no matter who they are.”
“I second the motion,” Murphy called out.
I gave her a smile.
“I agree, too,” Leslie added. “Plus, I really like Jason!”