My Soul Loves

by Barbara Gee

  Jude waited patiently while I thought things through. I finally gave a frustrated sigh and looked up at him. “I can’t say for sure. But there might still be something there on his part.”

  “Something Abigail wouldn’t like?”

  “Yeah. Possibly. Probably. She does get catty with me sometimes.” I looked up at him sadly. “You really think it’s her?”

  “It makes sense, don’t you think? I doubt the cameras had anything to do with your work. She was using them to study you, so she can emulate you or something.”

  I didn’t want to believe it. “That would be ridiculous,” I declared. “Abigail and I are as different as night and day. And she’s as perfect for Ian as I was wrong for him.”

  “Ian might not see it that way.”

  I folded my arms and scuffed my foot along the floor, not wanting to believe Ian was still that hung up on me. Then another thought crossed my mind.

  “The third camera,” I said slowly, speaking my thoughts as they formed. “It’s right over the table where Ian and I work when we’re bidding a job. Abigail knows that, because she came along a few times. Ian told me once that she was always begging to come, but he usually didn’t let her. He said her time was better spent working.”

  I looked up at Jude, becoming more resigned to his theory. “Maybe….maybe she wanted to be able to watch Ian and I when he came over for bid work. Maybe she didn’t trust him. Or me.”

  “He didn’t let her come because he wanted to be alone with you,” Jude stated. “Abigail would’ve been able to figure that out pretty easily. Which means you’re probably right about that camera.”

  “I still can’t imagine she’d go to that extreme. Plus, Ian never acted inappropriately. He knew I’d quit the team if he gave me any reason to think we couldn’t work together.”

  “But if Abigail didn’t know that—if she didn’t trust him with you—then the placement of that camera makes perfect sense.”

  Lulu snuffled at my feet and I knelt down to pet her. “I don’t know, Jude. It’s really hard for me to believe one of my co-workers would resort to that. I hate thinking about it.” The dog looked at me with sad brown eyes and I gave her an equally sad smile. “It’s awful, huh, Lulu? The thought of someone you know and trust spying on you?”

  I heard Jude’s low chuckle above me. “You know something else that’s kind of awful? That sweet little innocent face is the face of a dog who just pooped in the doorway.”

  The smell registered at the same time as his words. I whipped my head toward the door and sure enough, there was a sizable pile of Lulu droppings just inside.

  “Lulu!” I scolded gently. Her brown eyes became even more morose than before and she dipped her head in shame. And, I mean really, how could I be mad? “Aww, poor doggie. Did you want to go outside and no one was there to take you?”

  Jude gave a disbelieving snort. “Seriously, Ava? You’re going to let her off that easily? Lulu does this on a semi-regular basis. It’s the reason I know Hannah’s pregnant, remember?”

  I ignored him. “It’s okay, sweetie. Uncle Jude doesn’t mind cleaning it up.”

  “You’re the one who wanted her to stay,” he complained, but he went to the door nonetheless. “Is the bathroom down the hall?”

  “Next door down,” I said cheerfully. I took Lulu’s head in my hands and scratched her ears. “Thank you, Lulu. I needed something humorous right about now. No more thinking about cameras and mean girls tonight, okay?”

  Jude returned with toilet paper and a container of cleaning wipes from under the sink. He efficiently cleaned up the mess and flushed the evidence. I heard him washing his hands and then Lulu and I met him out in the hall.

  “Hungry for ice cream yet?” I asked.

  “Sure. We can eat it while I beat you at Battleship again. It’s time to put that feud to bed.”

  “You’re not going to win,” I warned.

  “We’ll see about that,” he replied, too confident for my liking. “However, I’d like to make one final suggestion before we drop the camera issue, at least for the time being.”

  “And what would that be?” I asked, standing up with Lulu cradled in my arms.

  “Talk to your mom,” he said softly. “Find out if Abigail ever asked her for the codes when you were gone.”

  I winced. “That means I have to tell her about the cameras.”

  “Or you can come up with some other reason for asking. Something that sounds legit.”

  I nuzzled Lulu’s neck. “I’ll figure something out.” I sighed and started walking down the stairs. “I guess if she did give Abigail the codes, our mystery is solved.”

  “Yeah, I’d say so,” Jude agreed. “Then there’s the matter of what you want to do about it.”

  I grunted. “You mean, like try to forget the whole thing ever happened and move on?”

  I got to the bottom of the stairs and put Lulu down. Jude joined me, hands on his hips. “I can understand you not wanting to pursue things to the point where you press charges, but don’t you think you should at least tell her you know what she did? Get her to explain herself?”

  I tried to imagine how that would work, and I couldn’t. I’m not a confrontational person. Abigail is. It wouldn’t be pretty.

  I gave Jude a rueful smile. “Honestly, even though she’s the one who committed the crime, she’d eat me for lunch if I called her out on it.”

  His brows rose and a corner of his mouth curled up slightly. “Is she scary?”

  “A little,” I admitted. “She’s real touchy. Good at what she does, but she has a short fuse. I avoid her like the plague when she gets in one of her moods.” I gave a little shudder. “She even looks scary. She’s tiny, but she dyes her hair bright red, wears black lipstick and big, clunky combat boots, and she has more tattoos than bare skin. She’s cute, in her own way, but yeah. Scary.”

  Jude put his hands on my shoulders. “Any chance it’s just a façade? That she might not be as tough as she looks?”

  “I don’t think so,” I said, shaking my head emphatically. “I think she looks that way because she is that way. Tough, defiant, and in your face. Which isn’t always bad. I mean, if she wasn’t totally obsessive about Ian, I think she and I would’ve gotten along fine. I kind of admire the toughness.”

  “Obsessive can be dangerous, and putting cameras in someone’s house isn’t normal jealousy. I don’t know if you should let that go just because you don’t want to face her.”

  “I know,” I said miserably, “but we don’t know anything for sure. Not yet.”

  “But you’re gonna check with your mom, right?”

  I started walking to the kitchen. “I’ll try to. I have to think of a way to bring it up that won’t freak her out.”

  “Good.” He followed me to the kitchen. “I’ll stop bugging you about it now. No more talk about the cameras tonight.”

  “That sounds good to me,” I said fervently. “Let’s end this evening on a high note.” I looked over my shoulder at him when I got to the fridge. “That means ice cream and me sinking all your ships. Then we’ll be even and I won’t have to worry about you gloating anymore.”

  “Bring it, babe.”

  ***

  He beat me again, and the game went back to the closet from whence it came.

  “Our Battleship days are over,” I announced, more peeved by my loss than I cared to admit.

  “It was fun while it lasted,” he drawled, giving a weary stretch. “I need to get going, though. Another early one tomorrow.”

  I closed the closet and walked with him to the front door.

  “Thanks for coming over. And for maybe solving my mystery. I hope you’re wrong about Abigail, but I’m not counting on it.”

  “I hope I’m wrong, too. Although that would mean we’re back to square one.”

  “I’ll let you know when I talk to Mom.” I nudged his arm with my shoulder. “Also….thanks in advance for coming back tomorrow to put up the channel for my
cables.” I grinned up at him. “I wanted to mention that just in case you’ve forgotten about your offer.”

  He stopped and turned to face me. “I haven’t forgotten,” he said, his eyes twinkling. “And thank you in advance for the good night kiss.”

  “I didn’t—”

  I’d intended to say I hadn’t made that offer, but I didn’t get a chance to finish. Jude’s hands gripped my waist and tugged me against his body, and any hope I’d had of uttering a coherent sentence went poof.

  I was back in my happy place. Since his kisses the night before, I’d almost convinced myself that I’d embellished the experience—that there was no way kissing him could be as good as I remembered.

  But it was. When his lips landed on mine, everything else went away. My world shrank to just Jude. The feelings. The rush of sensation. His big, warm hands on my back. His hard chest pressed against me. His lips claiming mine.

  I slipped my hands up along his arms to his shoulders, then into his hair. I wanted more. He did too, and pretty soon I was once again up on my toes, my hands molding his head, holding him there, our tongues sliding and tasting, making me feel all kinds of wrecked for him. I never wanted another mouth on mine. Only his.

  It was Lulu’s soft whining that finally broke us a part.

  “I know that whine,” Jude murmured against my lips. “She has to go out.”

  I slumped against him for a moment, waiting for rational thought to return. Lulu whined a little louder, so I reached up for one more kiss, quick and light, before reluctantly leaving the safe, warm circle of his arms.

  He looked down at me, his denim-blue eyes glittering in the soft light. “Just so you know, Ava, I think you’re all that, too. And there’s pretty much no chance of me losing interest. So you can put that out of your pretty head.”

  I smiled at him, still a little dazed. “Okay then. Tomorrow when I’m counting the minutes, all I’ll feel is anticipation. No nerves.”

  He nodded his approval and scooped up the dog. Lulu immediately snuggled up against him and gave me a smug sideways look that said I have him now, sister.

  I chuckled and rubbed her neck. “Good night, Lulu. Come again, but do your business first.”

  “Yeah, good luck with that,” Jude said with a grin. “Night, Ava.”

  “Night. See you tomorrow.”

  I watched them go out the back door, my heart full.

  Was it too early to count minutes?

  Chapter 14

  Hannah called me the next morning just as I’d gotten settled at my desk. She said she’d taken the day off work to get some things done around the house, and she wondered if I could come over for lunch.

  I couldn’t think of any reason not to. I wasn’t scheduled to officially start working again until Friday, and I was ahead of schedule in getting my equipment set up. Spending time with a new girlfriend sounded like a great way to pass a few hours. It would also help take my mind off Abigail.

  A few minutes before noon I slipped through the gate in the fence, stopped briefly to pet Lulu, who was picking her dainty way through the backyard, and then knocked on the patio door.

  “Come on in,” Hannah called out through the open kitchen window.

  I found her at the sink washing blueberries. “Hey, Ava! I’m so excited to have a lunch guest—and it’s just us girls! I figured we should take advantage of the opportunity, right?”

  “Absolutely,” I said, although I didn’t mind having the guys around. Especially one particular guy. I held up the vase of flowers I’d brought. “I didn’t have time to make any food, but I didn’t want to show up empty-handed.”

  Hannah’s face lit up. “Oh yay! Gwen’s purple salvia!”

  “Yep, it’s in full bloom right now. I managed to find some daisies in the weeds, too. I didn’t realize things are getting so overgrown. Grandma would be appalled.”

  “The joys of home ownership,” Hannah said with a laugh as she put the flowers on the table. “The work never ends.”

  “Something I failed to take into consideration,” I admitted.

  Hannah took a skillet from the stove and transferred its contents into a serving bowl. “I hope you like stir-fry. Chase doesn’t, but I’ve been craving it, so that’s what you’re getting.”

  “I love it,” I assured her, biting back the urge to ask what other cravings she was having.

  “Good. Everything’s ready.”

  We carried the food to the table and sat down opposite each other.

  “Okay if I say a quick prayer?” she asked.

  “Of course.”

  She grinned. “And then I want to hear all about you and Jude.”

  ***

  I didn’t go into a ton of detail because I didn’t know how much sharing Jude would be comfortable with. I did tell Hannah about seeing his house and the concert in the park. She eagerly listened and seemed genuinely happy that Jude and I were spending time together.

  “Chase says the two of them are going to help you put a special door in on Saturday.”

  I nodded. “I appreciate it so much, but I’m really afraid Jude is going to try to do it for free, and that’s not what I want. I hired him for the job. I certainly don’t expect them to give up a Saturday morning for nothing.”

  Hannah held up a warning hand. “Don’t try to get me involved. If the guys have their minds made up about something, it’s most likely not going to change.”

  “Yeah, I’ve sorta figured that out,” I admitted.

  She pushed her empty plate away—she’d had two generous helpings while I did most of the talking—and rested her chin on her hand.

  “You know, Ava, I’ve never seen Jude like this. I mean, he’s always a pretty happy, easy-going guy, but there’s been an extra sparkle in his eyes lately.”

  I gave a self-conscious shrug, pretty sure my own eyes were sparkling a little bit, too. “We’ve been having fun getting to know each other.”

  “Yeah, I bet.” Hannah gave a happy sigh. “I can see you feel the same way he does, and I’m so relieved. I’d feel so bad for Jude if it was one-sided.”

  I gave her a disbelieving look. “Seriously, Hannah? I can’t imagine any girl not being interested in Jude Keller.”

  She laughed. “I guess you’re right. I’m just not used to seeing it the other way around. He’s extremely picky, in case you didn’t know. Chase tells me he’s had girlfriends in the past, but he hasn’t dated anyone seriously since I’ve known him. And that’s been two years.”

  “Well, he’s not dating me seriously either,” I said quickly. “Like I said, we’re just getting to know each other.”

  “It’s heading that direction,” Hannah said confidently. She leaned forward and gave me a knowing smile. “I was still up when he came home last night. When he and Lulu came home, I should say. He looked like a man who’s falling in love.”

  My jaw dropped at her bluntness and Hannah giggled. “He also looked like he’d been thoroughly kissed. I have to say, it’s a good look for him.”

  I knew my face was flaming. “Hannah!”

  “Oops, did I say that?” she asked, grimacing. “Chase is always saying I need to get a filter.”

  “Chase might be right,” I told her, but I couldn’t stop my wide smile, and that made her laugh again.

  “Please tell me he’s good at it. It would be such a shame if a man who looks like that was a terrible kisser.”

  I pointed a finger at her. “I don’t kiss and tell.”

  She scowled. “Shoot. Now I’m always gonna wonder.”

  I grinned and relented. “Okay, I will say this.” I stood and picked up our plates before giving her a conspiratorial glance. “I wasn’t disappointed.”

  Her face lit up. “Not at all?”

  “Not in the slightest,” I said, carrying the dishes over to the sink as she gave a triumphant whoop.

  “Yes! Go Jude! I knew it!”

  “And that’s the last time I’m going to talk about that,” I declare
d.

  “And the last time I’ll ask,” Hannah promised.

  We made quick work of the dishes, then sat out on the deck with tall glasses of iced tea for more talk. She told me how she and Chase had met in college, dated for two years, then broken up for three before they met again at a mutual friend’s wedding. According to Hannah, they took one look at each other and fell in love all over again. Chase had proposed a month later.

  “Wow. Three years is a long time to be apart. I’m glad you both went to that wedding.”

  “Yeah, it is a long time, but you know something? It wasn’t a waste. We both feel our relationship is stronger for it. We were too young the first time. Even though neither of us had a serious relationship with anyone else during the years we were apart, we needed to grow up….so we’d be ready for each other when the time was right.”

  I liked their story so much. “Sounds like God had your back,” I said. “He kept you both safe from other relationships that could have damaged your future, while preparing you for what He had in store all along.”

  “Yes! That’s exactly the way we feel about it. I had some issues I needed to work through stemming from something that happened back in high school. I couldn’t bring myself to tell Chase about it the first time around, and it’s the kind of omission that would’ve put a huge wedge between us down the road. I was braver when we got back together. And he was stronger. Strong enough to give me the understanding and support I needed.”

  I pictured Hannah and Chase with their new baby, an extension of their love for each other, and I couldn’t think of anything more perfect.

  “I’m so glad it worked out,” I said.

  We talked for a while longer until I started to feel guilty about not getting anything done in the office. Once I got home, however, it was hard for me to concentrate. Even though it was stuff I loved to do, for the first time I could remember, it didn’t suck me in. I didn’t need to set a timer, because I was constantly checking my watch to see how much longer I had to wait to see Jude.