We sit in silence for a good minute and a half before I chance asking, “Soooo . . . are we going to go inside?”
He looks at me and wiggles his eyebrows. “Or we could have some fun out here.” His usual cocky smile isn’t completely convincing, and I know he’s just trying to stall.
I grab his shoulder and shake it. “Come on, Blake. We’re going in.” He reaches for the hem of my dress but I swat his hand away and look at him firmly. “Now.”
He hangs his head reluctantly but turns off the ignition. He takes two pieces of cinnamon gum out of his pocket and pops them into his mouth. Over the past few weeks I’ve noticed a pattern. When he’s feeling relaxed he has one piece, and when he’s feeling upset he has two. I find it curious and adorable. I’ve heard of people replacing one addiction with another, and it makes me wonder if chewing gum is a coping mechanism to help him stay sober.
As we each get out of the truck and walk up to the door he grumbles, “For a fake fiancée you sure are bossy.”
“Yeah, just imagine what I’ll be like as a real wife someday. That will be someone else’s problem. Lucky you dodged a bullet there, Blake, huh?” I try to laugh it off. I really did mean it as a joke, but for some reason the air shifts awkwardly between us. Before either of us can react, the big wooden front door swings open to reveal a slim, older woman wearing the fanciest beaded gown I’ve ever seen. “There’s my baby boy!” She throws her arms around Ryan’s neck and kisses both of his cheeks. He looks uncomfortable as he rolls his eyes and mumbles, “Hi, Mom.”
The woman then turns her gaze on me and looks delightfully astonished. “And is this the girl carrying my grandbaby?”
Ryan puts a protective arm around my shoulder. “Mom, this is my fiancée, Kelley. Kelley, this is my mother, Holly Blake.”
I smile, thankful Ryan’s warm body is so close to mine. I’m trying really hard not to make any snap judgments, but for as sweet as this woman is acting there is still one serious icy vibe I’m getting.
She claps her hands together as she sizes me up, surely trying to gauge if I’m good enough for her son. “Well, Kelley, I’m so thrilled you’re joining us. Now don’t just stand there you two. Come in, come in.” She ushers us into the house.
The entryway is gigantic and a huge, professionally decorated tree sits in the very center so it’s the first thing you see when you step inside. People are milling about with drinks in their hands and waiters are carrying around silver trays of food. A beautiful girl with green eyes and aubergine hair runs up to Ryan and throws herself at him. He gets that genuine smile on his face again as he hugs her back.
“About time my favorite brother showed up to this thing.” I notice the girl has the same exact teasing smile as Ryan, as well as a similar casual demeanor coupled with a cool edginess. She turns toward me and wraps me in a tight hug that feels natural and safe . . . the exact opposite of the impression her mother gives off. “And you must be the amazing girl finally tough enough to break this guy.” She hooks her thumb at Ryan, who introduces us.
“Hazel, this is Kelley, and Kelley, this is my annoying sister, Hazel.” Hazel sticks her tongue out at Ryan and he scowls, but I can tell they both adore each other. Neither of them seem anything like their mother, which amuses me.
Hazel looks at me and beams. “You’re so pretty.” She turns her head to look at her brother approvingly. “She’s so pretty, Ry.”
Ryan’s eyes never leave mine as he answers, “Yeah, I know.”
Hazel grabs my hands and looks at my stomach. “And oh my goodness, that’s my little niece or nephew in there. I sure hope this kid takes after its mother in the looks department.” She winks at me, indicating she’s purposely riling Ryan up. I like this girl already.
Forgetting their mother is still here, I jump when I hear her voice right behind me. “For goodness sake, Hazel, let them come in and get settled. Be a dear and take their coats to the closet.”
Hazel gives my hands a last squeeze before obeying her mother. Holly then comes between Ryan and I, putting an arm around each of our shoulders as she begins leading us into the adjacent room. “Your grandmother has been dying to see you.”
As soon as we enter the living room an elderly woman calls out, “There he is!” in an excited tone as she hobbles over, using a cane for support. Ryan beams and takes a few quick strides to reach her first and envelops her in a warm hug. She holds on tight and looks just as thrilled to see him. I think back to when Ryan first talked about his grandmother and remember the appreciation that shone in his eyes. It’s clear to me that they have a very special bond that is nothing like what he has with anybody else in his family.
The woman pulls back and places her hands on Ryan’s cheeks. “You get more good looking every time I see you. Must take after me.”
She winks and Ryan grunts, “You got that right, Grams.”
She then notices me standing awkwardly behind Ryan and switches her focus. “You must be Kelley. You’re even prettier than Ryan said.” She hugs me and says, “I’m Gloria, but you can call me Grams.” She pulls back to look at me and then taps Ryan in the chest with her cane. “You take care of this one, mister. I can tell she’s special.” As she says that last part, she looks at me sweetly and I instantly feel welcomed and at ease.
Holly and Gloria get called over to the door as another guest arrives, giving Ryan and I a moment alone.
“How you doing so far, Brooks? You feeling OK?” Ryan leans in and rubs his hands down my arms, intertwining his fingers with mine.
I nod reassuringly at him. “I like your family. They seem nice.”
“Yeah, well the night is young.” He sounds apologetic before looking sadly off into the distance.
“So, do I get the grand tour, or what?” I ask, trying to lighten the mood.
He snaps right back to playful Ryan. “Admit it, Brooks, you just want to see my old bedroom.” He smirks at me suggestively.
“You caught me. Now let’s see it.”
Ryan takes my hand and leads me up the giant staircase. We walk a short way down the left hallway, stopping at a closed door all the way at the end. Ryan opens the door and nods for me to go inside. I take a look around, noticing the messy bookshelves, dresser drawers that have clothes peeking out, and assorted items strewn about—a skateboard, hockey stick, video game system, and assorted magazines and books. It’s like he never left.
I think about how neat and meticulous his current apartment is and find it funny. “You’d think your mom could afford a housekeeper or something. You’re pretty messy, Blake. Or at least you used to be . . .”
I walk around, trying to soak in little details, desperate to understand just a little bit more about this confusing, complicated man I’m growing to like more and more.
“Yeah, well when I was here I didn’t give a shit about much. As soon as I was able to get out, I took the few things I needed and left the rest. I think my mom still has some twisted fantasy that I never really left.” He keeps his hands in his pockets, arms stiff. Clearly being back in this room makes him uncomfortable.
Before I turn to leave I catch a glimpse of a photo sticking out from one of the stacks of books on the desk. I pull it out to reveal a little boy and a girl standing on a beach. The boy is tickling the girl, who has a giant, beaming smile on her face. The boy’s blue eyes—that I’d recognize anywhere—are lit up with such obvious, pure joy I can’t help but feel happy, too.
“You and Hazel?”
Ryan comes up behind me and takes the photo from my hand. A small smile forms on his lips. “Yeah. We used to go to Peyton Cove every summer. It was my favorite place. There’s this huge beach that stretches out for miles and miles. When you stand out there it’s just you, the waves, the sand, and the sky. Nothing else seems to matter.” He scoffs and put the photo back on the desk. “It was nice when life was a lot less complicated, right?” Before I have a chance to respond, Ryan’s pointing toward the hall. “We should really get back down before
my mom comes looking for us. The more we can stay under Holly Blake’s radar, the better.”
Sensing he no longer wants to relive his past, I agree and follow him out.
As we make our way back downstairs, we hear our names called across the adjacent dining room. Kinsley and Lucas are standing with Eli, Logan, and Tristan so we make our way over.
“Hey, man. How’re you holding up?” Lucas slaps Ryan on the back. Ryan remains calm as he replies with a monotone, “Fan-fucking-tastic,” before shaking hands with Eli.
Logan and Tristan acknowledge each of us before Tristan eyes me and blurts out, “I still can’t fucking believe you two. Never in a million years would I peg you as a family man.” He jostles Ryan, who looks pissed. “Oh come on, Blake. We all know your rules about keeping your shit quiet, but you can’t deny the fact you basically invented the hit it and quit it game. This girl must have some pretty special moves to get you to stick around for more.” Tristan wiggles his eyebrows, clearly alluding to Ryan’s unchaste past.
While this isn’t exactly news to me, something about being reminded about all the women Ryan’s been with makes my stomach flip. Hopefully it’s just the baby. Also, I don’t know much about their relationship, but every time the four guys are together there definitely seems to be some unspoken tension between Ryan and Tristan.
As if aware of the brewing hostility, Tristan’s twin brother, Logan, quickly breaks in. “I, for one, think it’s about time this guy found a girl ballsy enough to handle him. Luc tells me you don’t take any of his shit, which is the way it should be.” Logan grins at me, his dimpled cheeks and blond hair making a lethally charming combination. Logan and Lucas are business partners, and from what I hear their venture capital firm is doing really well.
Kinsley steps in to say, “You’re all just jealous.” She slides over to hug me before pulling back to look at my stomach. “Ah you look beautiful, Kells. How are you feeling?”
“I’m really good. Sorry I’ve been so out of touch lately. Things have been crazy.” I’m suddenly hit with just how much I’ve missed her.
As if she can tell how much I need to talk, she hooks her arm in mine and leads me away from the boys to a quieter corner.
“How are things with you and Ry? How’s the baby?” Kinsley nudges me excitedly, anxious to hear all the details.
Do I really want to admit the most recent sexual development of my relationship with Ryan? I decide to focus on her second question. “The baby is good. Still growing and making me hungry as hell. Seriously, I feel like I could eat an entire cow.”
She giggles, but doesn’t let me off the hook. “And things with Ryan are good? Lucas told me what a big deal it is he let you inside his place, let alone move in, so it’s got to be strange spending so much time together.”
A puzzling look passes over my face. “What do you mean it’s a big deal?”
Kinsley looks thrown. “He didn’t tell you that you’re the first girl he’s ever had in his apartment? Hell, the first girl to even know where he lives, let alone get inside.”
I think back to Darrin’s reaction when I moved in, and how Ryan brushed off the comment as if it didn’t mean anything. Why the hell wouldn’t he tell me?
I don’t want to dwell on it so I hide my disappointment. “Things are good. We’re sort of friends now.” I try to appear innocent, avoiding eye contact but can feel her staring. “What?”
She gives me a knowing look. “You know, Kells, that’s the same look I used to get when it came to answering questions about Lucas.”
I shrug. “OK, so we have sex sometimes, but we both know it’s only practical while we stick with this whole fake engagement thing. I am fully aware it means nothing.”
“It’s kind of hard for it to mean nothing when you’re carrying his baby, Kelley.” Kinsley looks at me gently. “I just want to make sure you’re all right. I know how you feel about true love and everything, so going through this has got to be tough.”
Across the room I can see Ryan leaning back on a side table while Logan and Tristan talk animatedly. Man, why does he always have to be so damn good looking? I realize in this moment that yes, I do feel something when it comes to Ryan. I feel lucky that this smart, successful, loyal man is my friend. So what if we’re not meant to have a real romantic relationship? I can be myself around him, and that’s when you know you truly trust someone.
“It’s not so bad. I’m glad we’re helping each other through this. He really is a good guy, Kins. Even though he’s not the one, he’s a good friend and I know he’ll be a great dad.”
Kinsley nods her head. “Lucas says Ryan has been through some serious shit, but next to Luc he’s the most loyal guy I know.” She looks lovingly at her husband, who catches her eyeing him and smiles warmly. “But take it from me, Kell. Those are exactly the kinds of guys that make you realize you want something you never even considered.”
I pause at Kinsley’s words. The thing is I know what I want—I want true love and passion and a husband and a family. But I also know these are not things I will be able to have for a while, so I might as well make the best of things with Ryan while we ride out this fake engagement. My eyes are open and I know what this is, so there’s no harm in being really good friends who are going to have a baby together. At least for now.
I decide I’m parched and excuse myself to the kitchen. I ask a waiter for a glass of water and he disappears into a back room. As I wait patiently for him to return, Gloria walks in. When she spots me she comes right over.
“There’s that pretty girl who’s going to be my new granddaughter. I sure hope Ryan is behaving himself around you.” She grins knowingly and I can’t help but smile back.
“Well, I do have to put him in his place sometimes, but he takes care of me.”
Gloria pats my arm. “He needs a strong-willed woman to put up with him. I’m glad he had the sense to scoop you up when he had the chance.” She grabs my hands and examines the beautiful ring on my left hand. “And my ring looks like it was made for you.” She gets a wistful look as my eyes snap up to hers.
“Your ring?” I ask, confused.
She nods and brushes her fingers across the band. “My Winston gave me this fifty-three years ago. Although he passed when Ryan was only eight, he was a good man and the love of my life. When Ryan was old enough I gave him this ring and told him to give it to someone extra special. I’m glad he listened.” She looks at me with such genuine adoration I instantly feel guilty for being a complete and utter fraud.
I go numb and can barely speak. The surprising blows just keep on coming tonight. I manage to return her smile and nod, thankful the waiter interrupts us by handing me my water. Gloria gives my hand one last squeeze before making her way out of the room to talk with someone else.
Conflicting emotions play tug of war with my heart, going from feeling touched and honored to seething with anger. On the one hand it is very sweet he gave me such a meaningful family heirloom, but on the other it makes me extremely pissed off. He knows what we have is temporary and isn’t real, so is this just some big fucking joke? Am I so inconsequential that he didn’t think this would be a giant slap in the face? Here, Brooks. Come live with me like it’s no big deal and hey, why not wear this incredibly meaningful ring for a few months while we pretend to be engaged? And then I’ll take it back and someday give it to the real girl I’m going to spend my life with and we can all laugh about it.
The room gets smaller as the walls close in and I look around at all the strangers I don’t know. They are all wearing such fancy clothes and are talking and laughing and I feel very out of place. My heart starts to race and it’s hard to breathe. I could use some air . . .
As my shitty luck would have it, before I can make it to the door I’m stopped by none other than Holly Blake.
“Kelley, darling. Is everything all right? You look a bit pale.” She looks at me with pitying eyes and all I can do is stare back, not sure what to say as I try to keep my anxi
ety in check. I’m feeling confused enough about Ryan as it is without having to deal with his family, too. She simply pats my arms and says in an annoying, condescending tone, “It’s all right, dear. I know this can be a lot to take in.” She looks proudly around the room. “I always knew Ryan would turn out to be so successful. It must be overwhelming for someone like you to see where he came from, being that it’s so extravagant. I did everything I could to make sure he had every advantage in life, and look at him now. He owns his own law firm, has a nice apartment, and now he’s starting a family with such a pretty young girl. It just makes me so happy to know I did right by him.”
She looks downright pleased with herself and I suddenly want to scream. I don’t miss her not-so-subtle dig about “someone like me,” but that aside I think I’m more upset by her taking credit for Ryan’s success. As frustrated as I might be at him, I can’t let this awful woman say these things. I think back to the anguished look on Ryan’s face when he opened up about his family the other night, and that’s all it takes for me to ball my hands into fists, trying to hold back my unexpected anger. I know I should just keep my mouth shut—just bite my tongue until it bleeds—but I can’t. “I’m pretty sure Ryan got to where he is all on his own.”
Holly glares daggers at me before her sweet smile returns. “Excuse me?”
I feel panicked for a second, knowing this isn’t my place, but this vile woman patting herself on the back for how amazing Ryan is really ticks me off. He might come off as an arrogant ass sometimes, but he’s my arrogant ass and I won’t let anyone mess with him. Call it loyalty or call it crazy hormones, but I’m so worked up now I can’t back down. “I mean he’s had a hard life, no thanks to you, and it’s because of his own dedication and hard work he’s gotten to where he is.”
This makes Holly stand straighter, as she clasps her hands in front of her, the fake, creepy smile still in place. Seriously, is it botoxed on her face or something? Her voice sounds both sweet and threatening when she speaks. “I’m sorry, but I really don’t think this is any of your business.”
Mad Addiction (Crazy Beautiful #2) Page 9