Star Wars: Tales from Jabba's Palace

by Kevin J. Anderson

  I moved through a bustling throng headed for Jabba’s throne. He was blithely pulling away at his hookah, giving proprietary tugs at the chain of that captured woman who’d replaced poor Oola. But I was hijacked halfway there by Tessek, one of Jabba’s least trustworthy lieutenants.

  The Quarren was nervous. Every appendage on his head was twitching. He pulled me aside and talked in low, quick tones: “Have you heard what happened?”

  “I heard all about it.”

  “All?” he said. “But I’ll wager you do not know this!” His voice dropped lower, taking-on a confidential tone. “I checked on this Skywalker. I believe he truly is a Jedi Knight.”

  Though intrigued by this, I didn’t show it. “So what?”

  “There is more. I used my contacts to check the Imperial wanted lists. All our prisoners are on it, even the two droids! And they are considered most dangerous.”

  “Dangerous to the Empire.”

  “I think to us, too. These people destroyed the Death Star! This Skywalker fought Darth Vader and survived! Why would they come here and so easily be caught—unless it is on purpose.”

  “What purpose?”

  “To destroy Jabba. I believe … Wait!”

  He had spotted that wretched little vermin Salacious Crumb creeping close around, and he took a kick at the being. Crumb gave a high-pitched cackle and scampered away.

  “Filthy scum,” Tessek said with disgust. “I am certain it spies on me! Anyway, I believe there is an Alliance plot afoot. Their forces no doubt wait now to destroy us when we are most vulnerable.”

  “You really think they set this all up just to get the Hutt?” I asked. It seemed hard to believe.

  “I do. And I want you to warn Jabba of it. He will listen to you. You are his most trusted ally. Maybe his only friend. You must tell him.”

  Noting that Crumb was still watching us keenly from the safety of an overhead fixture, Tessek broke off here and wheeled away. He left me staring after him in deep thought.

  His story was pretty farfetched, and I was sure he was up to a few tricks himself. Still, there was something about that black-dressed man I’d seen. Something powerful. I decided I had to see this Skywalker myself, close up. Before I’d talk to Jabba, I’d talk to our “Jedi Knight.”

  In the lower corridor to the dungeon, I ran into Ree-Yees, quarter-rate scam artist, sometime killer, and all-around plug-ugly. The three-eyed Gran was stinking drunk, as usual, and it didn’t make him any friendlier. I wondered what he was doing creeping around down there at this hour, and he sure didn’t seem glad to see me.

  “Whadarya doin’ down ’ere?” he demanded, sticking his drooling goat-face up near mine.

  I shoved him and he staggered away a few steps. “Going to see the prisoners,” I told him, moving past. “I’m doing it for your pal Tessek too.”

  He went after me, grabbing my arm to jerk me around.

  “Whadyamean, my ‘pal’?” He slurred his words. “Whadaya know about us?”

  “Why?” I fired back. “What should I know?”

  “Don’ gimme that!” he cried in drunken rage. “You know! I’ll make you talk, you—”

  He started to pull a blaster. My hand shot up open-palmed into his chest and I shoved him back against the wall hard. In his condition he could only struggle helplessly, my big hand pinning him tight.

  “Now you’ll do the talking,” I said in my hardest voice. “I’m tired of this sneaking around. What’s Tessek up to?”

  “Go … to …” he gasped out through constricted lungs.

  I leaned harder. “Tell me or get squashed right now!”

  His chest cage creaked with the pressure. He gasped, his three eyes starting to bug out.

  “Okay! Okay!” he said in panic. “Tessek’s got a … plan! Deal with the … Empire! Gonna … raid!”

  His breath gave out and he sagged forward. I pulled my hand back and let him slip unconscious to the floor.

  So, there was a plot! And the Empire was in on it. Well, Jabba would have to be warned about that. But first, I had to satisfy my itch to see this supposed Jedi.

  I reached the dungeon, signaled the guard there to move away, and slid open the barred window in the cell door. Beyond I could see the three prisoners huddled together in a far corner. The captured Wookiee was cradling the still recovering form of Han Solo while a blond human dressed in black stood by.

  But the one in black turned right away and came over to the door, peering out through the little opening at me.

  “You’re the one called Skywalker,” I said.

  He nodded. “And you … you are a friend of Jabba’s,” he said in a voice as calm as if he were on vacation here.

  “The name’s Ephant Mon. I’m one of his … associates.”

  He shook his head. “You are much more. I can feel it in you. You are his true friend, and he is yours.”

  “Not a bad mind-reading trick,” I said, impressed. “Maybe you really are a Jedi.”

  He ignored that. “You can talk to him,” he went on more earnestly. “He listens to you. He’ll believe.”

  “Believe what?”

  “That he’s in danger. Listen, you can still save him. If you are his friend, convince him to release us. We mean him no harm. But if he persists in trying to harm us, I’ll have no other choice.”

  “So you are going to destroy him,” I said. “With what help?”

  “No help,” he assured me. “Not beyond us.”

  Though that sounded impossible, I found myself believing. I couldn’t help it. That he could do exactly what he said was in the cool sound of his voice and the sure look in his eyes. Still, it didn’t mean I could just buy in.

  “Maybe you’ve got the power to do that, maybe not,” I hedged. “It doesn’t matter. Even I can’t make Jabba let you go if he doesn’t want to. It’s impossible. I—”

  One of his hands shot out through the opening so fast I couldn’t react. It took a grip on my shoulder and hung on while his eyes fixed hard on mine. I couldn’t break away. I was suddenly paralyzed by that probing gaze. If he’d wanted to kill me, he could have.

  But that wasn’t what he wanted.

  I felt like some energy current was surging into me from him, crackling through my whole body. A thousand time-dimmed memories were lit up all at once. Images of my past life flashed by like I was a drowning man. I saw my own childhood with my parents’ clan. I saw myself growing up on my home planet’s vast plains. I relived the beauties of a time when I had once reveled in open skies and bright sunsets, freedom and space, family and comrades and a simple code of honor. I saw it all—all it had been, all I had left behind. It glowed before me like a paradise.

  He pulled his hand back, broke eye contact, and the images faded. I stared. I blinked, seeing the reality of dark, wet corridor and prison bars. The ugliness of the dungeon of Jabba’s lair closed me in.

  “You’re not evil,” he told me. “Not like Jabba. I feel the good in you. You’ve just come so far from it, and you’ve lost your way back. Find it now. Help us. Save Jabba.”

  “I … I could try,” I said. “I will try. But I still don’t think he’ll listen.”

  “I understand,” Skywalker said softly. “But I don’t want to destroy you with the rest. There’s still a chance for you if you want to take it. If you can’t free us, then don’t stay with him. Escape yourself. Find your true life again. And may the Force be with you, friend.”

  With that he turned away and rejoined his comrades.

  I went away from him shaken to my core. I’d never before questioned the way my life had gone. I’d just charged blindly ahead. My encounter with this Jedi had opened my eyes. I didn’t like what I was seeing.

  As I made my way back out of the dungeon, I noticed that Ree-Yees was gone. But I didn’t care about him or Tessek or any of that now. I needed someone to talk to.

  I went straight to the big docking area right behind the throne room. It was where Jabba’s sail barge was ke
pt, convenient for boarding by the Bloated One. I knew I would find Barada there, checking the barge’s engine for the imminent departure to the Great Pit of Carkoon.

  He quit work right away when I came in. The look on my face must have told him something big was wrong.

  “What’s the matter?” he asked me.

  “It’s hard to explain it,” I told him truthfully, plopping down on a crate. “Things have happened.”

  He sat down beside me. “Things?”

  “I saw the Jedi. Barada, I know Jabba’s wrong. He’s done a lot of things, and most of them weren’t good. But this is different. I’ve gotta stop him this time.”

  “Stop him?” He shook his head. “I don’t think even you can do that. He’s pretty set on getting that whole bunch who came after Solo. They tried making a fool of him.”

  “I know. But if I don’t stop him, I think he might be the one who gets hurt.”

  “What?” he said in disbelief. “And by what army?”

  “Tessek’s bet was that the Alliance was going to take a hand. He wanted me to pass that on to Jabba, probably to shift attention from his own plot. But the joke’s on him. There’s no Alliance reinforcements, but the danger to Jabba’s bigger than anything Tessek could imagine.”

  “Just from that kid and his friends? It can’t be.”

  “It can,” I said stubbornly. “And I’m going to tell Jabba so.”

  “He won’t like it,” Barada warned. “You know how he gets. If he thinks you’re crossing him, he might just drop you in that pit too.”

  “Okay. Okay,” I said. “I could just let it go and save myself. But I owe him.”

  “Enough to risk your life?”

  “Why not? He risked his life for me once.”

  “Did he?” Barada asked with interest. “How?”

  I’d always kept this to myself before, but there didn’t seem any reason not to spill it now.

  “Well, he and I were partners in a little gunrunning scheme way back, right after I quit mercenary work. We were going to liberate a cache of Imperial weapons and sell them to the highest bidder. It was on a moon of Glakka, nothing but a rough chunk of ice.”

  “We were pulling out the weapons when an Imperial goon squad arrived. We’d been ratted out by one of Jabba’s boys.

  “The rest of our gang either ran for it or bought it real quick. But he and I put up a better fight. He was thinner then, quick and tough and strong. Never seen a better fighter, except maybe me.

  “So we made a stand there, fighting back to back against them all. They came in close enough to smell ’em. I had to blast some right off his back. In the end only we were left, shot up bad, but alive. It was the weather that tried to finish us off.

  “When night came, it dropped to sub-subfreezing. I was worse off than him and not so well insulated, so he saved me, wrapping his own body around me. Not too pleasant a night, but better than turning icicle.

  “By dawn, he was nearly frozen himself. We only made it off that cube ’cause some of our bunch who had escaped before came back looking for us.”

  “I’ll be blasted,” Barada said in awe. “I always wondered why you stayed hanging around here when you could’ve gone anywhere.”

  “Now you know. I’ve been paying back ever since, spying out plots and scams against the Hutt, covering his tail. I’ve sent more than a few poor suckers to the rancor or Sarlacc myself. But not this time.”

  “I still think you’re wrong,” Barada said. “Seems to me you’ve already paid the boss back, and in spades. You don’t have to owe him anymore.”

  “There’s more to it than just that,” I said. “See, I found out I just can’t be a part of all this anymore. That Jedi’s touch did something. It revived something in me I thought was long dead.” I struggled to explain it to him, but this other reason wasn’t so clear to me yet. “My people back on Vinsioth were hunters and farmers. They were close to the land, to nature. They believed in the force in living things, and they worshiped it. But I was too smart for that. I was too good for their simple life. I wanted something more.

  “I thought I’d left all that life behind when I left to go soldier-of-fortuning around the galaxy. But it’s in me, Barada! I found out it’s a part of me I can’t ignore. And this Torce’ of the Jedi, well … it must be my force, too. I’m not gonna destroy it, Barada. I just can’t!”

  He listened, then he shook his head and sighed. “Sorry, my friend. I don’t get it. That’s all mumbo-jumbo to me.” He got to his feet. “You do what you have to. But I think you’re crazy.” He moved away.

  “Where are you going?” I called after him.

  “Back to work, what else? We’re heading for the pit in less than an hour. I just hope you’ll be a passenger, not a prisoner.”

  I thought it all over as Jabba’s court roused itself and got to work loading up the sail barge. When they started to file aboard themselves, I decided I had to make my move. I hitched up my courage and approached the Hutt as he glided toward the loading ramp on his repulsor sled, towing that captured woman who’d become his newest pet by her long chain.

  “My old friend, you seem troubled,” he rumbled out.

  “I am, Jabba,” I told him. “Please don’t do this.”

  “This?” he said in astonishment, stopping the sled short. “Do you mean my destroying this scum who tried to cheat me?”

  “I do. Skywalker is a Jedi.”

  I noticed the woman’s gaze jerking toward me at that. She listened with interest.

  “He is no Jedi,” piped up Bib Fortuna who, as usual, hovered close by. And Salacious Crumb, from a perch on Jabba’s tail, echoed, “No Jedi! No Jedi!” in a shrill, cracked voice.

  “This is wrong,” I said, not backing down. “Jabba, you have to let him go. Let them all go.”

  “I think Mon is up to something,” Fortuna said, eyeing me suspiciously. “Jabba, he must be in league with them.”

  “I am trying to save your life, Jabba!” I argued. “Look, you know no one’s more loyal than I am. You know I’ve always warned you about danger. I can tell you all about another plot right now! But it’s not important. Nothing else is: not Tessek, not Valarian, not even the Empire. Only this is. It’s bigger than us all, Jabba. It’s the Force!”

  “That foolish religion means nothing to us!” Fortuna cried indignantly. “The Mighty Jabba can show no fear of anything, including Jedi Knights!”

  “He is right, Ephant,” the Hutt agreed. “And Jabba has spoken. They must die.”

  “Then … I can’t go with you,” I told him with force. “I can’t be part of this.”

  “So you defy me?” he bellowed. “I should kill you for that.”

  “I know.” I met his eye without flinching.

  “I should,” he growled on, “but our old bond stops me. It buys your life, but that is all it buys. I thought of you as my true friend, Ephant Mon. That friendship is ended.”

  “You can’t call it over,” I shot back. “I can. Barada is right. I’ve repaid my debt to you a hundred times over.”

  “Repaid?” repeated Jabba, and a tone of regret came into the rumbling voice. I swear it was real, and I swear I’d never heard the like of it before. “Then it was never more than a debt to you. I am sorry for that.”

  He turned away from me and glided on toward the sail barge. The rest of his court followed. The captive woman stayed gazing at me in a bemused way until a jerk of her chain forced her to follow her master.

  “It was more than a debt,” I said after him, but in a quiet voice that no one heard. “Goodbye, old friend.”

  Jabba and the others disappeared into the barge. After them came a pack of Gamorrean guards prodding along Skywalker, Han Solo, and the rest.

  As the Jedi went up the gangway, a pang of worry for him shot through me. Did he and his friends really have a chance against the Hutt’s cutthroat crew?

  He must have sensed my emotion, because he turned right then and flashed a calm, confident little g
rin at me. It told me I did not have to fear for him.

  I watched the last of them enter the barge. I began to think about what I should do now. There’d still be room in Valarian’s operation for me. But that didn’t seem right anymore.

  The sail barge rose on its repulsorlifts in a flurry of dust, turned and sailed away, fading quickly to a dot on the vast horizon of Tatooine’s gray-brown wastes.

  Another, greener landscape came into my mind. I knew where I should go now. It had been made clear to me.

  I had to go home.

  Goatgrass: The Tale of Ree-Yees

  by Deborah Wheeler

  Slowly the harsh Tatooine day melted into afternoon. Early dusk softened the contours of Jabba’s palace and touched the drifted sand with a muted orange glow. Feathered lizards darted from their lairs to hunt insects in the cooling shadows. From a rocky outcropping, a meewit screeched once, twice, then fell silent.

  Ree-Yees struggled up the stairs from the side entrance, lugging a bucket. He halted at the top, his three eyes darting furtively over the eroded hills and the entrance behind him. As he stood there, his bony chest heaving, something of the twilight stillness seeped into him. It soothed the sting of that last bout with Ephant Mon, the one which began with, “You’re such an incompetent snot-brain, Ree-Yees, I can’t see why Jabba keeps you around,” and ended with Tessek, Jabba’s Quarren lieutenant, pulling the two of them apart.

  The sand whispered softly as a hot wind, the last exhalation of the day, blew across it. If Ree-Yees squinted his two side eyes, he could almost see the dunes as mounds of gently waving goatgrass. A pang rippled through his Grannish heart. He was not as drunk as usual, and not nearly as drunk as he wished he was. The arrival of the two new droids had made it difficult to slip away and refill his tankard with Jabba’s best Sullustan gin.

  Soon, Ree-Yees promised himself. Soon he’d be done with Ephant Mon and the rest of them. He picked up the bucket and shambled over to Jabba’s frog-dog, which had been put outside for the night. A tongue, long and sticky, dipped into the malodorous stew, then retracted with a snap, bearing blobs of moldy bantha fat, gelatinous chuff, and fragments of Viridian termite jaws on its bulbous tip. As the bubo swallowed, Ree-Yees reached down and dug his fingers into a purple wart on the side of the beast’s shoulder. It was a particularly large and fleshy growth. With a plop! the flap of skin pulled loose to reveal a miniature panel, two light squares and a reset button. Only Imperial technicians could design and fit such a device, undetected, right on Jabba’s doorstep. A symbol glowed on one square with today’s date, while the other flashed the words, “Shipment complete.”