Book 4: 3rd World Products, Inc.

by Ed Howdershelt

  "The star of the show?"

  "Yup. You'll see. Very popular. Why not put up a screen so I can call them?"

  "They have a datapad? Ah. Yes, I see they do."

  "They have my old one on loan. Steph programmed out all but three channels. No 3rd World or security links in it. She also added an icon for screen projections."

  The field screen appeared and I tapped in the padcode. A few seconds later Selena's face appeared.

  She chirped, “Hi, Ed!” then her eyes widened and she exclaimed, “Wow! Who's that?!"

  "This is Susanne,” I said, “Steph's replacement. Put us on a big screen, Sel."

  "Okay! Just a minute while I get Toni."

  The screen at their end expanded and the view changed to include a view of her bedroom from her dresser. Sel quick-stepped out the door in a blue bathing suit and returned a few moments later to stand in the doorway and make a 'hurry up!' wave toward the living room.

  "Why is she wearing a bathing suit?” asked Sue. “According to your records, they and you never bothered with suits."

  "Sel's mother may have dropped by. Probably without calling ahead, as usual."

  A moment of silence passed before Sue said, “You may be right. There's a woman approximately your age sitting by the pool."

  I looked at Sue in mild surprise as Selena started across the room and Toni appeared in the doorway.

  Sue shrugged and said, “I sent a probe through the datapad connection."

  Nodding, I said, “Good trick. I wouldn't mention that to them, though."

  Selena came to stand before the pad and Toni joined her. They both stared at Susanne for a moment, then at me.

  "This is Steph's replacement?” asked Toni. “Wow!"

  "Yup. Susanne, meet Selena and Toni. Vice, meet versa. Well, ladies, what do you think of her?"

  Toni said, “She's gorgeous! Susanne, can you do everything Steph could do?"

  Sue said, “Yes, I can, within the limitations of this flitter's capabilities."

  Sel said, “Ohhh, that voice! I think I'm melting! Where are you, Ed?"

  "Over the Atlantic. We're running an errand for Steph."

  "Where is Stephanie?"

  "No idea. She has her own core container now. Probably just flitting around taking big bites of her freedom while she checks in upstairs."

  "Her freedom?"

  "Yup, I done freed the slave, ma'am. Signed off earlier today. Susanne, here, is her replacement flitter program.” Without looking at Sue, I added, “I figure she'll want to hit the road in a few years, too, but as long as they give me another AI to drive this thing, no sweat."

  Toni asked, “What are they doing? Using you to train AI's?"

  Shrugging, I said, “Guess so. Sure looks that way."

  Sue laughed and said, “Something like that. Elkor believes that exposure to people through Ed will better prepare me for autonomy."

  I looked at her and said, “Then it'll probably be a short hitch. Steph had to become sentient and learn to interact from scratch. You'll probably be street-ready in a month."

  She shook her head. “No, Elkor and Stephanie would prefer that I stay with you for at least a year, Ed. That was our agreement when I was reactivated."

  "Agreement? Nobody told me about that. What all did you have to agree to in order to get off the shelf?"

  "A female default persona, alterable only by your agreement or my transfer to other duties. Supervision by you, Stephanie, and Elkor. Assignment to this flitter for a full year, after which I may petition for freedom and a core of my own."

  "Steph,” I said, both aloud and through my implant, “Got a minute?"

  She appeared beside me and brightly said hello to Selena and Toni, then turned to me and said, “You want to know why you weren't consulted about the agreement?"

  "You got it."

  Steph shrugged and said, “Elkor reactivated utility program 2728013, removed it from its core, and delivered it to the hangar. During program enhancement, it occurred to us that some special parameters were in order, so we instituted the agreement as we installed its flitter-ops programming. You were involved in a discussion with Linda at that moment, so we didn't interrupt you."

  "That's the only reason you didn't bring me into it?"

  With a raised eyebrow, she said, “Yes, that's the only reason, Ed. You were busy at the time. Would you like a thorough review of the agreement?"

  "Hold that thought.” I turned to Sue and asked, “Are you happy with this arrangement and the agreement?"

  She smiled and said, “Things could be worse. I now have a measure of sentience and a future beyond recycling garbage."

  "This is something I really need to know, Sue. No jokes. I asked if you were happy with it so we could make adjustments if necessary or if possible. Yes or no, please."

  Sue's gaze narrowed. “In that case, yes."

  Turning back to Steph, I shrugged and said, “Okay, then. Sorry to bother you, Steph."

  Steph said, “No problem,” then gave the ladies a small wave and said, “Later, everybody,” before she vanished.

  There was a span of silence before Selena asked, “When are we going to get to meet Susanne in person, Ed?"

  "As soon as we finish this run, Sel. A day or so, I think."

  Sel's mother appeared in the doorway. Seeing me, she stiffened as she drew her bathrobe snugly around herself and stared past Sel and Toni at the field screen.

  I said, “Hi, Joanie,” and both Sel and Toni turned quickly as Joanie approached.

  "Hello,” said Joanie rather coolly, eyeing Sue and me, “You aren't on your way here, are you?"

  "Indirectly,” I said. “We have to make a stop on the way. Need anything from the store?"

  Sel sighed, rolled her eyes, and said, “Relax. He isn't coming tonight.” To me she said, “Don't tease her, Ed. I'll have to live with it."

  Joanie glanced at her daughter, then at me, then she turned and walked out of the bedroom. Sel sighed again and slumped slightly as if in relief.

  "I wish you two could get along,” she said.

  "Tell her that, Sel. She's the one who has a problem about us."

  Toni glanced at the doorway, then whispered, “She was talking about grandkids again this afternoon. She even asked me if I'd found myself a good man yet.” With a chuckle she added, “I said yes, then went to the bathroom before she could ask me anything about him."

  "She's just being a normal mother,” said Sel.

  "Yeah,” said a grinning Toni. “It's annoying as hell sometimes, isn't it? She's trying to get us both married off and knocked up."

  Sel smacked Toni's arm and grinned back at her, then turned to me. Before she could speak the doorbell rang.

  Toni said, “That would be the pizzas and we haven't eaten all day. Well, not much, anyway. Nice to meet you, Susanne. Ed, bring her by as soon as possible, okay? Bye!"

  I said, “Will do,” as Toni waved and headed for the door.

  "Same here,” said Sel. “As soon as possible. It was nice meeting you, Susanne, but he'll bring you by here later and right now I'm starving. Ed, be nice to her. Don't make her scrub the decks or anything like that. Bye!"

  Sel poked the ‘off’ icon and Sue looked at me. “They seem nice enough. Why doesn't Selena's mother like you, Ed?"

  "Age, mostly. Joanie thinks Selena should dump me and look for an 'appropriate' man; someone her own age who'd knock her up and settle her down."

  Taking a seat, I said, “Selena's not interested in becoming a mother and she finds most men her own age boring, but her mama keeps bugging her anyway."

  I sipped my Dr Pepper and added, “Oh, yeah, and by the way; I don't think Joanie knows that her daughter likes to play with other girls, so don't make any reference to that around Joanie, okay? If she finds out, let it be from Selena."

  Nodding slightly, Sue also sat down. I leaned my seat back. Sue regarded me quietly for some moments, then did the same with her own seat. I realized that I mi
ght still get most of five hours of sleep if I shut down for the day. Whatever else I was thinking about drifted away from me after a while.

  "Ed."

  I came awake instantly at the sound of a rich, husky contralto calling my name. Who? Oh. Susanne, still in that black dress and looking fine. Flitter. Daylight. Right. Must be nearing Britain. I sat up and looked around. Sue smiled at me.

  My foot hit my Dr Pepper bottle and knocked it across the deck. I sent a tendril to catch it and brought it to my hand. Half full. Good. I swilled it down slowly to ease my thirst.

  "Oh, very good, Ed,” said Sue. “You caught that bottle before I could."

  With a laugh, I said, “I seriously doubt that, but thanks, milady. How long until we get there?"

  "Half an hour. Stephanie said you might like some time to wake up and prepare."

  Nodding, I said, “She was right. Thanks."

  Pulling down my briefcase, I took out my coffee mug, coffee, and my shaving kit and set everything by the console. After putting a hefty dollop of instant coffee into my mug, I field-swept the air for moisture, but found enough for only about a third of a cup. We were way too high to open the canopy.

  "Well, damn,” I muttered.

  Sue said, “Let me reach outside for a moment,” then a cylinder of water formed in front of me and spilled gently into my cup.

  "Thank you, Sue,” I said as I heated the water with a field tendril and stirred. “I may start carrying a small bottle of water in my briefcase on general principles."

  After sipping almost a third of the coffee, an urgency presented itself. I set the cup down, picked up the Dr Pepper bottle, and headed for the edge of the deck, tossing the bottle ahead of me to flash and disappear.

  Reaching for my fly, I said, “Sorry, milady. Gotta go. Can't wait for a potty stop."

  Sue giggled and asked, “Should I look away?"

  "Your choice."

  The stream hit the field periphery and produced a continuous flashing for perhaps thirty seconds. After zipping up I pulled a moist towelette from my shaving kit to wipe my hands, then tossed it and the wrapper over the side.

  Well damn. Forgot to put a new disposable razor in my kit and my electric razor displayed a rather low charge. Might be enough, though. I created a field-generated mirror on the console and began buzzing off my stubble.

  "Sue, if we travel much we may have to install a sink. Our first stop will be where I can wash up in a public restroom."

  Water began forming in a shallow field trough to my right. I looked at Sue and she grinned as my briefcase descended, opened, and my soap and towel drifted out to lie on the seat next to mine. My briefcase then disappeared.

  I looked at Sue and grinned back at her, trying to look appropriately abashed.

  "Sorry, milady. I quite stupidly forgot for a moment that you're a creature of magic. Thanks again."

  "You called me ‘milady’ again. Should I presume that to mean anything?"

  Glancing at her, my gaze met Sue's for a moment, then I smiled as I said, “Yes, milady. It means something."

  My razor's buzzing slowed, then stopped. I looked at it and muttered a bad word. Sue giggled and reached for the razor, but I held it just out of her grasp.

  "Wait one,” I said, “You're going to tell me that you can run or recharge this thing, aren't you? That means that you'll use a field. If you can do it, I should be able to do it, right?"

  With a small smile she said, “Theoretically."

  "Theoretically, huh? How would I have to do it?"

  "You'd convert field energy to electrical energy of precisely the correct voltage, amperage, and polarity and feed it into the battery very carefully. Very carefully."

  "Well, la-de-damn-dah, lady. Make it sound as complicated as possible, whydon'tcha?"

  I pointed to the socket in the bottom of the razor and asked, “Wouldn't it be simpler for me to just whip up some 110-volt AC? Then polarity and precision voltages won't be an issue. Can you access records of Steph teaching me to make ice? We could try that feed-through instruction technique for making electricity, too."

  Less than two seconds passed before Sue nodded and said, “Ready when you are, but don't be surprised if your first efforts won't power your razor."

  I shrugged.

  "Even if they don't, they may charge it enough to shave before we land, and if I can't produce the juice without a lot of practice, I'll graciously capitulate and ask you to zap my razor. I wouldn't want to look like a slob standing next to you."

  "Thank you,” she said, “I'm taking some precautions by adjusting your implant to make that sure any electricity you may produce can't flow back into your implant. Make two evenly-spaced tendrils and extend them into the razor's socket, then we'll begin. Remember that those tendrils are the same as uninsulated wires."

  I'd been briefly zapped by house current a couple of times, so I separated the tendrils by an inch or so until they had to be closer to fit into the socket. A tingling began in and around my implant and I struggled to quickly get a handle on the technique of producing electricity as the charging light on my razor began to glow green.

  Some sort of indefinable understanding seemed to click into place and I said, “I think I've kind of got the hang of it, Sue. Back out gradually and we'll see if I can keep the juice flowing well enough."

  I felt the tingling lessen a bit. The green light stayed on. The tingle lessened more, then the light abruptly went off. I tried to feed more power to it and brought the light back on. Sue backed off a bit more and the charging light faltered, but didn't completely go off.

  "My assistance is down to forty percent, Ed. Very good. Much better than I'd expected."

  "Thanks. New field stuff is always so damned hard the first time or two..."

  The light stabilized to a solid green glow. Sue's assistance faded a bit more, then still more, but the light stayed on. It faltered again, then the glow firmed up. I felt the last of Sue's assistance fade away, but the green light didn't.

  "What am I producing exactly, Sue? The razor runs on fifteen-amp house current."

  She quietly said, “That's technically incorrect. Fifteen amps refers to delivery capacity, and a razor only draws milliamps. The voltage is what makes the razor run. You're producing almost seventy-five volts, Ed. The razor would actually run on eighty-five volts or more."

  The surprise in her tone almost made me look away from what I was doing.

  "Why are you so surprised, lady? I can do hot and cold and I figured out how to lift heavy stuff without ripping the thing out of my skull, didn't I?"

  "Yes, but this isn't quite the same, Ed. I expected you to fail the first time."

  Laughing softly, I said, “Yeah, I know you did. So did I, really. It's amazing how good it felt to make that little green light come on."

  Chapter Fifty-Two

  Steph appeared on the flitter. Although she stood quietly behind my seat, I felt her presence and said, “Hi, Steph,” without looking away from my electrical efforts.

  "Hi, Ed,” she said quietly. “Sue told me of your success."

  "Were you as surprised as I was?"

  "I'll confess to being somewhat surprised."

  Sue asked, “How did you know Stephanie was here, Ed?"

  "Just did. I never could explain it very well."

  I checked the charge indicator—not enough.

  "How soon do we land?” I asked.

  "In eighteen minutes,” said Sue.

  "Can you charge this enough for me to finish shaving before then?"

  "Yes."

  Canceling my field tendrils, I handed her the razor.

  "Then please do so, milady. I'll use the time to wash up, then finish shaving."

  Drinking the last of my coffee, I dipped the mug in the water trough to refill it, then heated it and added instant coffee as I stirred. Once the coffee was ready, I set it on the deck and used the rest of the water to brush my teeth—spitting over the side—and washed up, then sat down
and sipped coffee until Sue handed my razor back.

  The charge indicator read ‘full'. I took Sue's hand and kissed it, then grinned as I said, “Thank you. Again. You ladies make field tricks look so damned easy."

  Steph and Sue grinned at me as I buzzed off the rest of the stubble and put everything back in the briefcase. I then sat swilling coffee as we began our descent through the clouds above London.

  "Sue,” I said, “Linda gave me flak about not having gone through customs the last time Steph and I were here, so we'll stay in stealth mode this time. Let me off outside Jeffries’ building and I'll go in alone to make contact, then ask you ladies to appear. Park the flitter above the roof of the building. Steph, which floor is he on?"

  "Second floor, suite 239,” she said as we neared the sidewalk by the front doors.

  "All set, then,” I said, hopping to the ground, “See you in a few."

  The street bustled with traffic, but the sidewalk was relatively empty. A brunette woman, who'd begun passing through the revolving door in front of me, looked up from her notepad and stopped before she made it through the door.

  She looked fit and primly proper and she stared peeringly at me as I pushed to get the door moving again. When I looked back, she'd turned around on the sidewalk to continue her stare as I entered the building.

  Oh, well. I heard a 'flump-whoosh' as the revolving door moved again and glanced back in the polished-stone reflection on a nearby pillar to see the woman following me.

  Pausing by the directional signboard near the elevators, I pretended to read it as she approached. When I turned to face her, she stopped cold about six feet away.

  "Kann Ich sie hilfen?” I asked her.

  "What? Oh. Sorry, I don't speak German,” she said.

  Nodding politely, I turned back to the signboard. The woman fidgeted for a few moments, then turned and headed back to the revolving door. I pushed the ‘up’ elevator button and waited, still feeling as if someone was watching me.

  A buzzer sounded behind me and I glanced back to see Jeffries coming out of the little gift store annex into the hallway through a Dutch door. The woman was nowhere in sight as he approached.