Book 4: 3rd World Products, Inc.

by Ed Howdershelt

  Glaring hotly, Linda said ominously, “Stand by? Oh, this better be good, Ed. Real damned good. Better than good."

  Turning to Sue, I asked, “Steph told you the plan?"

  "Yes, Ed."

  "Okay. Zap yourself to Linda and make absolutely sure that nobody else hears you tell her what we're up to, but let them see you tell her about it. That's it. Go now, please."

  Sue vanished.

  Returning my gaze to Linda's, I said, “You're about to hear something that nobody else needs to hear, Linda."

  She snapped back, “I'll be the judge of that."

  "Yeah, but I think you'll agree when you hear it."

  Sue appeared next to Linda on my pad and whispered to her for a moment. Linda's eyes widened and her mouth fell open slightly, then she tapped a comm button and told Angela Horn to send flitter two to meet us.

  "On my way, ma'am,” said Angela.

  "No. Just the flitter. In stealth mode and subsonic."

  "Ma'am?"

  Intensifying her voice slightly, Linda said, “No pilot, Lieutenant. Just send it out there. Now."

  "Yes, ma'am."

  Again facing me, Linda calmly said, “Two's on the way, Dragonfly. Swear everyone involved to total secrecy. Flitter two, as well. Records of use will be edited appropriately."

  I said, “Will do, Fearless Leader,” as Sue reappeared on the flitter.

  Flitter two arrived within seconds and Steph took command of the transmutation operation. Both ladies disappeared, then Steph informed me that they were inside the trailer and beginning the process by transmuting the detonating explosives first to preclude an accidental—or an intentional—nuclear blast.

  As we rolled through the flat North Dakota countryside and a town that was little more than some buildings clustered around three stoplights, I opened a Dr Pepper and summoned up a separate datapad window to call Bost Automotive about a new engine for my car.

  When Chuck Bond answered, I told him I had an 84 Olds Eighty-eight and asked if he knew where he could find me a new engine.

  "We got two of ‘em in the back lot right now,” he said. “One's a 307 from an ‘85 and the other's a 350 from a ‘94. We had to scrap the rest of that car. Bad accident. Either one is gonna be nine hundred. Installed, that is."

  Linda's standby icon began to flash.

  "Hold on one,” I told the guy at Bost. “My boss is calling on the other line."

  "I thought you were retired."

  "It's a part time thing. Gotta make ends meet, y'know. Hang on a sec, okay? I'm probably gonna go with the 350."

  "Yeah, okay."

  I poked Linda's icon to switch screens and she appeared wearing her 'what the hell are you doing?' face.

  "What the hell are you doing, Ed, calling a garage in the middle of a mission?"

  "What else should I be doing, Linda?"

  "This is a real bad time to smart off to me!"

  "I'm not. There's nothing I can do to help the ladies, so what else should I be doing right now?"

  She fumed for a moment, then viciously punched the standby icon on her pad.

  I brought the Bost connection back up and asked, “You still there?"

  "Yeah. You gonna take the 350?"

  "You're the mechanic. Would you take it?"

  "Yeah. Less miles and you need some muscle in a big car. Might even get better mileage, believe it or not."

  "Good enough, then. When can you pick up my car?"

  "This evening good? Around six?"

  "Yeah, I think so. It kind of depends on how things go here later. I'd better call you back this afternoon."

  "Okay. Later, then."

  "You got it. Thanks."

  Forty-one minutes and thirty-two miles of farm traffic and stops after starting the procedure, Steph announced that there was no longer any plutonium in the bomb.

  "Excellent, Steph. I've always said you were some kind of a goddess. Now you have to believe me."

  Steph mock-sighed and said, “Yeah, yeah. You always say that when I do something nice for you."

  "Yeah, well, name anyone else who could have handled it, milady. Now let's see about Peterson. Five suit on."

  I hopped to the roof of the trailer. A few moments of climbing behind the cab later, I was able to look through the driver's door window and eyeball the harness that held poor ol’ drugged-up George.

  Quad-overlay straps like those of a parachute harness had been intricately wrapped around Peterson's arms, legs, and chest, then pop-riveted to the seat, the floor, and the side of the cab. There were no buckles, of course, and some of the straps had been riveted to the driver's door.

  "Steph,” I called, “Are there any explosives in the cab?"

  "No,” she said. “May I ask why you didn't simply have one of us lift you to your present perch, Ed?"

  "I wanted a look at a few things on the way. Thought you might be a little tired, too, after all that transmuting stuff."

  "Oh, my, you're being facetious. How cute."

  "Yes'm. That's me; cute to the core. I'll slice Peterson loose and hand him out to you."

  "Just cut the straps and open the door. We'll lift him out of the cab and onto flitter two."

  "You got it, ma'am. Keep this thing on the road, okay? They'll probably hit the kill switch when I cut the wires."

  Snapping open my belt knife, I sawed through the door straps, then four of the other straps. Sure enough, the engine died and the truck came to a gradual stop.

  After opening the door, I pushed the straps off Peterson and held the door open as Steph fielded Peterson out of the truck and aboard flitter two, which streaked away toward the base.

  Before I slid into the driver's seat, I stood on the driver's step to reach for the camera, yanked it down, and tossed it on the floor on the passenger side. No need to let them see the base. Once inside, I turned off my five suit.

  When I turned the key, the truck wouldn't start. I traced the wires from the harness to a point under the dash and simply yanked them all out, then turned the key again. This time the truck started and I let it run as pneumatic pressure that had bled off built back up. It didn't take long.

  Once I had the truck moving again, I yelled, “Hey, Steph! Swing the flitter around front and open a visual link to Linda, then hop in! Sue! You, too! Get in here for the group shot!"

  I couldn't see the flitter, of course, but when Steph and Sue appeared on the seat next to me, I grinned at Steph and said, “Well, hi, there, Sweetie! Don't you worry about that ‘no hitchhikers’ sticker on the window; it's just one of those dumb ol’ insurance things. How do you like my big ol’ truck?"

  She laughed and I reached up to give the air horn a couple of blasts, then keyed my implant and said in my best Texas accent, “Breaker, breaker, howboutcha, there, Fearless Leader lady! This here's the one ol’ Dragonfly, eastbound and hammer down on thirty-six and a-watchin’ real hard for them local yokels and county mounties. Come on back to me one time, won'tcha pleeeeze?"

  Linda drily replied, “Someone—possibly you, in fact—once told me that even a Rhodes scholar will sound like a practicing hillbilly on a CB radio. May I presume that you have good news, Dragonfly?"

  "Well, yes'm, actually, I do. We do, that is. Steph, Sue, and flitter two neutered the nuke, Peterson's probably tucked away in the infirmary by now, and I'm gonna drive this here great big-assed blue truck whereverthehell you want it to go, Fearless Leader lady, ma'am."

  Someone in the background barked laughter and Linda smiled as she said, “Just drop it off with the people in the radiation suits outside the front gate. I'll have someone save you the trouble of trying to park it on base."

  Feigning shock, I asked, “Is that a lack of faith I hear?"

  "You bet it is, Dragonfly. You haven't driven a big truck in twenty years and you aren't going to drive one on my base."

  Letting her see my agony at her words, I said, “I'm hurt, ma'am. I'm truly hurt."

  Laughing, Linda said, “Too bad,
so sad. By the way, everybody; many, many thanks to all of you. Great work. What's your ETA?"

  "Again with that ETA stuff. Hell, I don't know. Steph?"

  Steph said, “Approximately four minutes, Linda."

  Linda said, “Thank you, Steph. You always were the brains of that outfit."

  "Oh, yeah? Hey, Linda!” I said, reaching for the air horn again. I got a blast in before her finger hit the ‘off’ icon.

  Sure enough, just outside the gate there were a couple of trucks, some cars, and a bunch of people in radiation suits. I stopped the truck where one of the rad suit guys indicated, told Steph and Sue I'd see them aboard the flitter, and said, “Three suit on,” before getting out of the truck.

  Standing a bit away from the truck and people, I keyed my implant and told Sue to haul me aboard the flitter, then we headed toward the main complex.

  Just inside the main doors I saw Emory Wallace talking with a senior guard and detoured to tap the back of his hat.

  "Hi, Cap. Where's Linda?"

  Looking around, he said, “No idea. Where the hell are you?"

  "Three suit off. Is that better?"

  The desk guard startled hard as I appeared and Wallace grinned and said, “No, you're still you. Hi, Stephanie. Hi, Susanne. I hear you all did a great job with that ... situation."

  The ladies thanked him and I asked, “How come you weren't in the ell-six command room? You're security, right?"

  Emory eyed me and said, “I was moving everybody underground, just in case your solution didn't work. In case you weren't aware, base evacs are part of my job."

  Shrugging, I said, “Nope. Didn't know that. Nice to know somebody's on top of it, though. Had lunch yet?"

  "Didn't you have a lunch date with Linda and Chang?"

  "Yeah, but I'm changing plans. I'm too hungry to wait an hour or more for food. They can meet me in the mess hall."

  Calling up a field datapad, I tapped Linda's icon.

  She answered with, “Where the hell have you been? People are looking all over for you."

  "Well, now they can stop looking,” I said with a shrug. “You know where I am, and that's good enough. How about you and Vickie meeting me in the mess hall? I'm kind of starving."

  Linda looked at her watch and said, “Yeah. Okay. We'll be there in about ten,” then disconnected.

  When I let the datapad dematerialize, Wallace stared at me.

  "What?” I asked.

  Shaking his head, he said, “Never mind. Yeah. Lunch."

  "Ed,” said Steph, “Sue and I have something to discuss. May we join you later?"

  "Sure, Steph. Chang can meet Sue later."

  Steph and Sue disappeared, further startling the guard.

  As we headed for the mess hall, I said, “If people start dropping by the table, it's up to the authoritative type in the uniform to head them off. That would be you, sailor."

  He gave me an odd, glancing look and continued walking without comment. A few minutes into lunch, Linda and Vickie arrived. They waved on their way to the serving line, then joined us with their trays.

  Chapter Sixty-six

  Linda sat down beside Wallace and Chang sat next to me as Linda announced, “We've decided to call the incident a vicious hoax. A terror tactic."

  Wallace nearly choked as he quietly exclaimed, “What?!"

  Linda smiled and nodded.

  "The bomb was full of lead. It was just a nasty way to show us that they have the technology."

  "We had aerial readings,” said Wallace, “Hot readings."

  Shaking her head, Linda said, “A small decoy device. It's in the lab."

  After a moment of peering at her, Wallace asked, “How's the driver?"

  "They think he'll be fine in a few days."

  Wallace gazed at Linda and Linda met his gaze serenely for a few moments, then she returned her attention to her plate.

  We ate in silence for a short time, then Vickie Chang asked, “Wasn't Sue supposed to join us?"

  "She'll be along if she can,” I said. “Something came up."

  Vickie nodded, then said, “Well, hoax or not, it was a good thing that you and Sue happened to be in the area today."

  Glancing at Linda, then meeting Vickie's eyes, I asked, “Do either of you still have any doubts about Sue's qualifications to coach softball?"

  Freezing in mid-bite, Wallace asked, “Softball?"

  Linda gave me a quick fisheye look, then said, “No,” as Vickie chuckled and began, “Oh, no, not..."

  "Go ahead,” said Linda.

  Vickie nodded and said, “Not at all, Ed. After today, though, I can't understand why you'd part with her at all."

  "She needs interactive experience with people, Vickie. Time with all ages and types, not just with me."

  With a glance at Linda, Vickie said, “Well, she'd get it with us, that's for sure. If Linda has no objections, we'd be pleased to have her in Volunteer Services."

  "No,” said Linda. “No objections."

  "Done, then,” I said, “If she doesn't show up before the end of lunch, I'll send her by Vickie's office later."

  Sue didn't show up. Wallace and Vickie headed for their offices and Linda and I lingered over coffee. A period of silence elapsed before she spoke.

  "You really pulled a rabbit out of your hat out there, Ed."

  "You mean the transmutation thing? Steph would have mentioned it to you if I hadn't thought of it."

  "Are you sure about that?"

  "Yup. She was about to step into things when I called her about my problem with Sue."

  "Regarding closing the connection to me, you mean?"

  I grinned. “Yeah. That problem, too, milady. On a couple of occasions Sue's been balky or snotty at the wrong times and she seemed a little confused about who was in charge of the immediate situation at the truck."

  Nodding, Linda said, “I heard that part. Is that what this volunteerism is really about? Getting rid of her?"

  "It's exactly what I said it is; a way to let her get the people experience she needs to graduate."

  Giving me a peering look, Linda asked, “Then what?"

  "Then I'll ask for a standard flitter core."

  More silent time passed, then she said, “I see. You and Steph had some tense moments, too, as I recall."

  "That's no reason to set the stage for more of the same from someone else, is it? Volunteer Services will get a ton of work out of Sue and she'll get to work with lots of people. She'll follow orders and have to give them at times, and nothing beats being in the middle if you want to learn to understand the needs of both ends of the chain at once."

  Linda regarded me thoughtfully for a time, then said, “I think I see some kind of a pattern, but I'm not sure what it means, Ed. You're farming Sue out to VS. Selena graduates this year and she'll be moving to Tallahassee with her job."

  She sipped coffee, then continued, “While Stephanie will undoubtedly visit, she won't be with you all the time as she was before. Have you been deliberately cutting back your ... uhm, circles of involvement?"

  "No. Selena's on schedule with her prearranged course of action. Steph was ready for her independence and Sue needs a hitch with an outfit like VS."

  After a sip of coffee, I said, “Also, Toni doesn't graduate for another year and she'll be living in Sel's condo until it's sold, so I don't expect to suffer greatly. If Toni drifts away, I could probably hook up with Myra for a while. She's got a life of her own, so I don't think she'd try to be a constant companion."

  "Uh, huh. So that's what this is about? Not having someone else around all the time?"

  "Partly. The other reasons, mostly. I just noticed that things were culminating in that direction and the idea of having the house to myself again sounds good, so I'm going with it."

  "You never felt that way with Steph, did you?"

  Shaking my head, I said, “Nope. Never did and still don't. It'd be fine with me if she'd make my house her home base."

  "But then
you wouldn't be alone."

  "No, but I wouldn't feel the need to be alone, either."

  Biting her lip and sitting back to give me an arched eyebrow, Linda quietly asked, “You love her, don't you?"

  Shrugging, I said, “Yes, I do, Linda. I feel a bit incomplete without her immediate presence, even though we're still connected.” I tapped my comm implant for emphasis.

  "Well, damn, Ed! Have you ever told her?"

  I thought about it and shook my head.

  "No, I don't think so. Not in so many words. Not until you brought the subject up just now, anyway."

  Linda's eyes widened a bit and she whispered, “You mean she's been listening to us?"

  "Probably so. She keeps a tab on me. Steph? You busy?"

  Steph smilingly appeared in the seat beside me and put her hand on mine. Linda seemed frozen for some moments.

  Gazing first at Steph, then at me, then returning her gaze to Steph, Linda muttered, “Oh, my God,” then asked, “Then you were aware of his feelings for you?"

  "Yes. He hasn't tried to conceal them from me."

  "Do you, uh, do you share his feelings? Can you?"

  Nodding, Steph said, “Yes, of course. I can and I do."

  "Then ... what ... uh ... what are you going to do?"

  "Do?” I asked, “About what?"

  Smiling at me, Steph turned to meet Linda's gaze and asked, “Yes, Linda; about what?"

  Looking a bit confused, Linda said nothing for some moments, then she took a deep breath and sighingly nodded.

  "I see.” She cleared her throat again and said, “I think.” She then again sipped her coffee and muttered, “My God."

  "Let's change the subject,” I said, “How's your thing with Wallace going?"

  Linda sat upright and asked, “What?"

  "Well, hey, ol’ friend, ol’ buddy, ol’ pal; since you're so concerned about my love life, I figured it was only fair..."

  "Oh, I'm sure you did.” She paused a moment, then seemed almost grudgingly to admit, “As a matter of fact, Emory recently brought up the subject of marriage. Not as an immediate option, of course, but ... well, we've discussed it."

  "Oh, lordy,” I said softly, shaking my head.