A Lady for the Taking
Page 13
Would it matter to her if he was? Probably not.
Penny was drawn to the man like the proverbial moth to a flame. She could not explain why. She wished she could. She also wished she could simply ignore him when he entered a room but she couldn’t do that either. Not when every last bit of her body came alive when she saw him.
So she would take the risk and get close to him, praying he never learned her secret. And if he did? Well, she would sort out that mess if and when it happened.
It was odd, really. All of this risk for a man she barely knew.
Except that she knew enough at this point, Penny supposed. She knew that she wanted him more than she had ever wanted another man in her entire life.
She also knew him from the stories that had been in the gossip rags over the years. They had spoken three times now, kissed once, and Penny knew Harry was just as he had been described. Kind. Considerate. Polite. He also had a wicked sense of humor when he allowed himself to unbend a little. When he was more Harry Greer and less Bow Street Runner.
He was also heartbreakingly handsome and seemed to view himself as something of a protector. Hadn’t he called himself that, anyway?
He had listened to her and her fears. He hadn’t laughed at her or chided her for acting like a child. He had understood something about her that she had been convinced no one else ever would.
He was also an excellent kisser. More than excellent.
And that? That was enough to build a fairy tale on, at least as far as Penny was concerned. Because it wouldn’t last. It couldn’t. So why worry about wondering whether or not it was enough to build a future on? That would never happen anyway.
Still, standing in the middle of this sumptuous ballroom, with the azure blue patterned wallpaper and puffs of cotton hanging from the ceiling to resemble clouds, there was a brief moment when Penny wished that it could.
“Are you having a pleasant time, my lady?” As if thinking of Harry could conjure him up out of nowhere, he appeared at Penny’s elbow before she could even open her fan.
She also could not stop the utterly stupid smile that spread across her face when she saw him. “I have only just arrived, Mr. Greer.”
“Harry, remember?” he corrected her with a sly wink.
“In public?” Penny was a bit shocked. Harry was always so proper! Of course, that was before the kissing part the other evening. So perhaps he was not so proper after all. Or he was trying to coerce a confession out of her. She should be more concerned about that last bit, she supposed. But she wasn’t.
“Public. Private. Whatever you prefer. I simply need to speak to you as soon as possible. What I have to say cannot wait, I’m afraid.” Harry offered Penny his arm and inclined his head toward the terrace. “Though I really would argue against discussing something this important in public, as I would hate for false gossip to spread. So I should like to speak in private, if you please. As I said, we have something of great importance to discuss, after all.”
“We do?” Penny couldn’t imagine what. Or rather, she could, though she didn’t think Harry would be so bold as to have a discussion about her uncle’s plans here, in the middle of the Ardenton ballroom.
He nodded, his face all but an expressionless mask. “We do.”
“Very well.” Oh, that did not sound good. Not good at all!
Though she was all but quaking inside, Penny still took the arm Harry offered her and allowed him to lead her to a far corner of the ballroom near the open terrace doors. This afforded them privacy without risking complete ruin. Well, mostly anyway. It would have to suffice. Penny was not about to leave Harry’s side until she discovered whether or not he knew her secret.
“Harry.” That seemed to be what he wished to hear her say just then.
“I like it when you say my name.” He was grinning again and she wanted to smack some sense into him. What had happened to the stiffly proper Runner from the other night? Why was he behaving so oddly?
Unless, of course, those kisses had affected him just as much as they had affected her. Could they have? She doubted it, but she did hope.
“I cannot do that often when we are in public! You know that! It is not proper.” Was the man going daft on her?
At that, he sobered, his eyes capturing and holding hers. “What if I don’t want to be proper with you any longer? Penny.”
Harry had said her name. And just her Christian name. Oh, no. This wasn’t about her uncle at all, but rather about that kiss the other night. Or possibly more. This was going too fast too soon. She needed to run. But where would she go? And had she not just imagined this very thing? Being close to him? Wasn’t this what she wanted?
She had and she did. But then fantasy and reality were often two very different things. And reality was often a good deal more frightening than fantasy she was discovering.
“That,” Penny swallowed hard, “that is not a good idea, Mr. Greer. In fact, I think it’s a terrible idea.”
“Harry,” he corrected her again as his gaze flicked downward and once more, Penny felt her body begin to flame red as a smile slowly spread across his face. “And I would say that your body disagrees. Quite vehemently, it would seem.”
Penny’s gaze followed his and she wasn’t surprised to see a flush creeping up her chest once more, especially as her nipples became hard points, clearly visible through the thin fabric of her gown. What was it about this man that made her blush so easily? And why had she worn such a revealing gown? Oh, yes. Now she recalled. She had wanted to tempt this man. That had been a bad idea. A very bad idea, indeed. Would she never learn? When it came to this man, likely not.
Penny bit her lip as she always did when she was nervous or uncertain. “Mr. Greer.” He held up a single finger in silent admonishment. “Harry, we cannot do this.”
Once more, he surprised her by reaching up and pushing a stray lock of hair out of her eyes, as if they were alone in the ballroom. Which they weren’t. Though he was beginning to make her feel as if they were. Just a little. “We can. Perhaps not forever, but maybe just for a little while.”
“What do you mean?” Penny was wary, but she also felt as if he had just handed her the keys to the gates of paradise. What could it hurt to listen? Wasn’t this what she wanted?
Yes. Yes, it was. But what if she was wrong? Then again, this was only temporary, so what did it matter? Perhaps it didn’t. Perhaps nothing mattered but this man and what she wanted from him.
Harry’s hand lingered on her hair for a long moment before he dropped it back to his side. “It means that there is something between us, my dear. Those kisses the other night proved it, even if our previous flirtation, however brief, did not. I’ll not call it love, for I’m not so foolish, but rather an intense attraction. You have awoken feelings in me that I never thought I could feel. And you? I have the impression that I make you feel something rather intense toward me as well.”
“Go on.” Penny would rather die than admit just how much this man affected her. Because he did and right now, he was all but setting her toes on fire with mere words.
Silkily spoken words, at that. In a voice that made her all but swoon and caused shivers to race up her spine.
Harry reached for her hand and Penny allowed him to grasp it. “I am not asking to bed you, my dear. I know you are seeking a husband, likely a very specific one. And that man is not me. But I am not certain you have even found this man you seek just yet. So until you do? Let us enjoy this thing between us for as long as we can. It would not be the first time I was linked to a lady I had no intention of marrying. You know that already.”
Penny narrowed her eyes. Was this some sort of trap? Another game perhaps? Or was Harry being sincere? Unfortunately, she had no way of knowing.
“Lady Dory.”
Harry shrugged carelessly, though his eyes never left Penny’s. “It is hardly a secret and I’ve already told you the truth regarding my relationship with her. But I am a cold man, my lady, or so I’ve been told.
Unfeeling. Passionless. And yet you with you? I am not. I am…more. You have tasted the proof yourself.” He was, Penny knew, referring to their clandestine kisses. “Knowing all of that, what harm would there be in a mild flirtation until you find the man you seek?”
“That? That is your brilliant idea?” Penny scoffed, though her heart was in her throat. She wanted so badly to say yes to this mad proposal, but she didn’t dare. “So we what, Harry? Dance and flirt and…and kiss or whatever else until we have to part?” She could not and she would not! Her uncle would have her head! Except that she wanted to – very much.
Harry’s eyes softened as he gazed at her and Penny felt her resolve weaken – just a fraction. “We can do whatever you like, Penny. Whatever you are comfortable with. But whatever we do, be it kisses or merely walks in the park, we do it together. You entrance me, Miss Marshfield, and I should like to see where this attraction leads. If only for a time.” He swallowed hard and she had the impression that this was not a game for him. “Even if this infatuation or whatever you wish to call it cannot lead to marriage. I know what I suggest is slightly scandalous, and is most probably madness, but it is still what I want. What I desire.” He paused, running his thumb over the inside of her wrist like a lover’s caress. “And I think, deep inside, you desire the same things as well.”
This was madness! She couldn’t! And yet…she wanted to, very much.
“Why?” One word. One question asked so softly that she wasn’t certain he heard. But he had.
“Because.” Harry slid the pad of his thumb over her wrist again, harder this time, and Penny felt her pulse jump wildly at his touch. “Because of the other night and because we want to enjoy each other’s company. I have said many times that I am not a passionate man and yet, when I’m with you, I feel…well, something that I cannot define and cannot explain. But I do feel, Penny. But only with you. And when I look in your eyes? I see something that leads me to believe it is the same for you.” He paused again, longer this time. “Or am I wrong?”
Penny wanted to lie to Harry. She wanted to tell him that he was wrong and that there was nothing between them. That this was all in his imagination. But her life here in London was built upon lies. Lies that would haunt her for the rest of her life. And her time here would end soon enough. Once the gossip sheets reached her uncle, that would be the end of things.
So why not? Why not spend this time with Harry? Why not do as she pleased and indulged in a few more kisses with him. Because right now she could and because right now she wanted to. In fact, she wanted nothing more than that. Fullbridge wasn’t coming back to London. She was only kidding herself to think otherwise. So why not do as she wished for as long as she could?
And she did want this man. Harry – the man who had captivated her the other night by looking and sounding exactly like the knight in shining armor she had fantasized about since she had been a little girl. What would be the harm in a few dances, a stroll in the park and perhaps another stolen kiss or two? Nothing. Especially not when the future looked so very bleak.
“Very well.” Penny spoke only two words this time but she could see the enormity of their impact on Harry in the depths of his brilliant blue gaze. “We must be discreet, of course, as I must think of my reputation, but I agree to your proposal. For now.”
“Is that a yes?” he asked, likely wanting to be certain he had heard correctly.
Penny nodded. “Yes. Yes, Harry. For the time that I am here, we can be whatever it is that we wish to each other. Just know that our time together will not last. It can’t for reasons that I am not free to explain.”
“I will take what I can get,” Harry assured Penny as he led her onto the ballroom’s dance floor and pulled her into his arms as the orchestra struck up a waltz once more. “And I will take all that you are willing to give me. Penny. Perfect Penny.”
That had been easy. Almost too easy. Harry had expected Penny would put up much more of a fight at his suggestion that they enjoy each other’s company for a bit. After all, she was here to find a husband. She was on the Marriage Mart. She had said so herself.
And he was hardly husband material.
Then again, if she was actually looking for a husband, she was doing a rather terrible job of it. In fact, the only man she was ever around was, well, Harry himself! Except that she had made it clear that she didn’t completely trust him and likely had no interest in marrying him, even if he was looking for a bride. Which he wasn’t.
So why had she agreed to his proposal?
Harry had his suspicions but didn’t wish to voice them. They were simply too ugly for as lovely a woman as Penny Marshwood.
He preferred, instead, to think that she had agreed because she desired him nearly as much as he desired her. Which she likely didn’t, but he could lie to himself for just a bit longer on that count, he supposed.
Harry honestly hadn’t imagined that Penny would agree to his proposal, though a tiny part of him had hoped she would, of course. And this whole “get close to see what she’s hiding” business had seemed like a rather fine plan when he had first thought of it in the garden, though rather less so as he had waited in the far corner of the ballroom for Penny to appear so that he might make her an offer she would find irresistible. Especially when he knew he only wanted to be close to her so that he might be able to kiss her again. Or more.
Still, he didn’t think she would agree. No proper lady would.
But Penny had. And that made Harry suspicious, but not suspicious enough to turn away from the opportunity to hold Penny in his arms again.
He was aware that people were now whispering about them as he twirled Penny about the ballroom, but for the first time since he had begun his career on Bow Street and became determined to hold himself to a higher moral standard, Harry found that he didn’t care. Not one bit. All he cared about was the smile on Penny’s face now as she moved just a little closer to him, seeming to accept the inevitable – just as he had – that some sort of force was drawing them together whether they wanted to be or not.
All of which made his conscience howl at him in indignation.
In general, Harry considered himself a good and moral man. He did not lie, except when necessary for his job and he did not abuse the affections or trust of others, particularly women. Except that he was abusing Penny’s trust and affections in the most wretched of ways. He was using her and her obvious attraction to him in order to get close enough to her so that he could uncover what sort of unsavory business she was about.
Because she was up to something.
On the other hand, there was also no denying this attraction between them, and in truth, Harry wanted this – far more than he wanted to know what she had planned for Fullbridge, actually. He wanted to feel the hot flare of passion with a woman again. It had been far too long. Did that make him a horrible person? Possibly, but he was also human and he could not pretend otherwise.
Besides, if Penny was an unwilling participant in this plot – one likely conceived by her uncle – then the closer he was to her, the easier it would be for him to help her when the time came.
For Harry considered himself an excellent judge of character and there was nothing about Miss Penny Marshwood that suggested she was a hardened criminal. Rather, she seemed lost, confused, and more than a bit lonely, feelings Harry understood all too well. When this plan came to its inevitable and messy end, she would likely need someone in her corner. Why not him?
“Where did you go, Mr. Greer?” Penny looked up at him with those lioness-like eyes of hers, as if she could see directly into his soul. “One moment you are here with me and the next, it is as if you are off in another world. Am I that dreadful of company?”
And all his plans would be for naught if he bungled this by woolgathering. “A thousand pardons, my lady. I suppose I was merely wondering why you had agreed to my proposal.”
Harry wanted to add that it was hardly proper, but somehow, he managed to still his tongue for th
e moment. He had never had such trouble when investigating a suspect before or been so utterly thoughtless in the process. Why now?
There was a brief moment when Harry was convinced that Penny would not answer him. Then, finally, she sighed. “May I confide in you, Mr. Greer?” she asked as he moved her gracefully into a third turn. And noticed that her knee locked a bit as it had the other night.
“Of course. Whatever you wish to say, I am ready to listen.” Was she really going to confess everything? Right here and now in Amy and Gibson’s ballroom? Could it be that easy? Surely not, for even he was not that good!
“As you are with Bow Street, I will assume that you know at least some of my past.” She pursed her lips, clearly waiting for an answer.
“I know enough, I suppose,” Harry confessed. This was not going at all the way he had thought. “Your parents passed away several years ago, which I first learned the other night. You are a ward of your uncle, the current earl and you have a cousin named Josephine. You spent time at Mrs. Fitzherbert’s school near Bath until you arrived in London for your come-out. You spent time in Cumbria and now you have returned to seek a husband. Did I miss anything of note? It is not as if I have been investigating you, and all of that is well-known information.”
Which, of course, was yet another lie, but Harry couldn’t very well tell her the truth.
Penny might have had a tiny suspicion that he was lying to her just then, but she didn’t say anything. Instead, she relaxed into his arms just a bit more, confusing him even more. “You have the right of it,” she finally sighed, “though you likely don’t know that my cousin is preparing for her come-out as well. She’s already been presented at court, though she has not enjoyed a formal Season as of yet.”
“She is of age for that, I believe, at least according to the gossip sheets.” And according to the report lying on Harry’s desk back home. Another lie, one more in his growing pile.
“Older than you would think, actually,” Penny confessed as she nestled just a bit closer to him. “She is nearly twenty and my uncle has plans for her to come to London next Season. Hopefully to seek a husband since she has already made her bows at court.”