Animal Instinct

by Kate Davidson

  “We are not having that discussion. Ever. I’m still trying to block out the knowledge.”

  He let out a quiet laugh. “You won’t forget, Jacquelyn. You and I both know you won’t ever forget.” She met his warm, brown eyes and sighed. No, she wouldn’t forget.

  He wouldn’t let her.

  Chapter Nine

  JACKIE KNEW IT WAS ridiculous to worry about Saturdays when she had so much else to do. Every one of the twelve horses she had in her barn needed attention whether it was lunging, training for an upcoming show or lessons with their owners. So another week had passed with all the same work and her throat was already beginning to tingle with anticipation. It didn’t matter. She probably just had a crick in her neck, anyway. With impatient tugs she stripped off her gloves and tossed them on her desk. It was only nine o’clock in the morning. O’Connor wouldn’t turn up until the sun had set. At least, that’s what she assumed.

  Another worry she had was how she could convince Macbeth to start sleeping on top of her again. He’d refused to let her pet him this week and barely glanced at her when she put out the food. She knew his feelings were hurt as well as his pride. Jackie felt guilty about allowing O’Connor to usurp Macbeth’s position as alpha male. There hadn’t been any other way to make the arrangement between vampire and human work but that didn’t make her conscience feel much better. Now not only was she having trouble with her human relationships but her animals ones were going to hell, too. Added to that, the dreams Izzy had talked about had found her. Apparently Macbeth really had been protecting her mentally as well as physically. Jackie wanted that protection back.

  The dreams were fucking disturbing. All shadows and dripping candle wax while she writhed on a bed with sheets that couldn’t have been softer if someone had woven them out of clouds. She hadn’t been able to see who touched her or even her own body but she had definitely been touched. Jackie had never had sex dreams like that. Something told her that O’Connor, for it could only be O’Connor, was paying special attention to her since when she’d called Izzy to ask about how often the dreams visited she had said she only got them after she fed him. Jackie got them every night and she woke up every night at exactly three AM. She was going to give him a piece of her mind tonight. Then she would do whatever she could to get Macbeth back on her side. She didn’t care if she had to prepare a filet mignon and feed it to him. Jackie might just go crazy if these dreams kept plaguing her. Or she might jump him the next time he turned up, which would be just as bad. It was probably what he was wanting, too. Clever bastard.

  “Stop dwelling on the negatives,” she told herself firmly. Whining wasn’t going to get her anywhere. Besides, there were things to be thankful for. The sauerkraut poultice had worked like a charm for Francis and his health continued to improve. Plus, after making a call to Lorraine, her twit of a niece had been told off and put in her place. Francis was getting the care he deserved and Jackie didn’t have to bother with any interfering relatives. The horse’s mom loved him. Too bad she wasn’t the best judge of character. Sofie walked into her office and interrupted her chain of thought.

  “Jackie, Sarah’s here. She doesn’t look any better,” she said, obviously worried. Jackie sighed. The past week had been rough on Sarah although she hadn’t admitted to it. She didn’t smile as much and obviously wasn’t sleeping well. Jackie tried to get her to talk about it. Sadly, the kid was good at keeping her mouth shut. She hadn’t cracked once.

  “Okay, enough is enough. I’m going to talk to her before we start the lesson today. Could you work Westy in the round pen? He just needs to stretch his legs a bit today.” Sofie nodded.

  “Aye, aye, captain.” She headed off while Jackie stepped out of her office between stalls and searched for Sarah. It didn’t take long to find her. She was walking by the stalls in her riding pants and a rumpled, long-sleeved green shirt. Her shoulders were slumped. The depression on her face was more obvious than usual. In fact, there was even a little bit of pain. Something serious was going on.

  As Jackie came to that realization she noticed Kim Lyndon, a dumpy woman with gray-streaked brown hair and unpleasant watery blue eyes, leading her high-strung chestnut gelding out of the stall. Demarco was a difficult boy even on his best day. He threw tantrums about the tiniest things such as a brush being out of place or a chair being somewhere that it hadn’t been before. He worked well in the arena but he was a pain outside of it. The Thoroughbred was pretty average-sized. That didn’t stop Jackie’s heart from racing when she saw him rear and nearly jump on top of Sarah.

  Sarah knew what to do when a horse was spooking. The general rule was to get the hell out of the way. She ducked away from Demarco to the other side of the aisle, banging her left shoulder on one of the stall doors. Jackie saw all the color drain out of the girl’s face. She didn’t know what had happened but she could tell that Sarah was in extreme pain. Jackie snatched the lead rope from Kim’s useless hands and pulled Demarco’s head down. He tried to pull away but it was a futile gesture akin to a dinosaur flailing in a tar pit.

  “Stop. Now.” The sheer menace in her voice cut the horse’s temper tantrum abruptly short. He huffed but bowed his head, the fight leaving him. Satisfied that Demarco had gotten the message, she handed the rope back to Kim.

  “I don’t want you touching my horse that way,” she spat at her.

  Jackie stared down at the much shorter woman with chilling eyes. “You’ve been warned countless times that his behavior is a liability. Either you let me teach him ground manners or you find a new facility.” She turned away and kneeled beside Sarah. “Where did you hurt yourself, baby?” Sarah seemed to debate answering for a moment but common sense conquered whatever else was warring inside of her.

  “My shoulder. It really hurts,” she whimpered.

  “Let’s go to my office and take a look,” Jackie said, leading her out of the aisle and into her small office. Once they were out of the way of any temperamental horses, she cautiously touched Sarah’s left shoulder. And nearly had a heart attack. “Jesus Christ, you’ve dislocated it.” How had that happened? She hadn’t hit the door that hard. It should have bruised her at the very worse and not a bad bruise, at that. “Sofie!” Jackie shouted, knowing Sofie was in the crossties and close enough to hear.

  “Coming, coming,” Sofie said, hurrying into the office. “I thought you might want to see me after that little escapade.”

  “Her shoulder is dislocated,” Jackie told her.

  Sarah looked between Sofie who was frozen by the door and Jackie whose hand on her back had become tense. Both their expressions were horrified. “It… it’s not that bad, right? I’m not… not broken forever, am I?”

  Jackie shook her head quickly. “No, honey, it’s easy to fix. Your arm slipped out of the socket. We can push it back in,” she hurried to say when she saw how frightened Sarah looked. She began to gently stroke her hair, using the same kind of soothing motions she did with Shylock. “You’ll be okay. It’ll hurt for a minute when it’s pushed back in but then you’ll be perfect.”

  “Okay.” She took a deep breath, preparing herself. “Fix me.”

  Sofie glanced at Jackie. “Do you want me to?” When Jackie shook her head, she gently held Sarah’s right side. “I’ll help hold her, then.” Her grip would tighten if it became necessary to keep her still.

  Jackie hesitated for a minute. “Sarah, maybe a hospital would be better.” The child’s entire body went rigid with fear.

  “No hospitals. I can’t be in a hospital again. I can’t!” she cried, voice breaking with hysteria.

  “It’s okay, sweetheart, it’s okay. I won’t make you,” Jackie soothed, taking a hold of the child’s left shoulder. “I hate them, too.” She felt gently around, feeling the dip of her empty socket and the protrusion of bones, trying to determine how best to slide the arm back into place. It had been years since she’d last had to fix a dislocated arm. The memory returned to her in an instant and
she could see it all in perfect detail. Ruffled brown hair, narrow face drained of color.

  “I trust you, sweetheart,” he’d said brokenly. “Now push!” Jackie snapped the bones back into place and Sarah cried out.

  “The worst is over, Sarah. You’re going to be fine,” Sofie promised, gently rubbing her back.

  Jackie saw the hug coming and wrapped her arms around Sarah’s shaking little body in response. “You’re okay, baby girl. You’re okay.” She ran her fingers through Sarah’s hair. There wasn’t any reason for her to feel weepy but that didn’t stop the tears welling in her eyes. She bit her lip and fought them off.

  Sofie stepped back. “I’ll go get a sling. She’s going to need it for about a week while the ligaments heal.” Plus, she didn’t want to intrude on this moment since Sofie wasn’t really that maternal while Jackie was dripping with it. Her boss’s head shot up.

  “No, a sling wouldn’t be good for this. They hold the arm in the wrong position for the ligaments to heal. Just go ahead and work Westy for me, okay? I’ll take care of Sarah.” Sofie nodded and backed out of the office.

  “I didn’t know how bad it was,” Sarah whispered, tears in her voice. “Mom said it was an accident.”

  Jackie froze. She could feel each and every muscle stiffening in reaction. This would only alarm the little girl she was still holding so she did her best to remain calm. “An accident?”

  “Gregory doesn’t like it when she drinks in the mornings. She was trying to sneak one and… She said it wasn’t his fault. He was angry and I got in the way,” she whispered against her teacher’s stomach. Jackie had to be extremely careful. If she let her grip tighten any more she might accidentally hurt Sarah.

  “Did he hit you, Sarah?” she asked as calmly as she possibly could.

  “No, he didn’t. The coffee table did.” Jackie choked on the air she was trying to breathe. “He was throwing things and I wasn’t paying attention. It was just an accident.”

  “Right.” She was going to explode. Any second now Jackie would completely lose control of her hard-won calm. Slowly, very slowly, she tilted her head back and stretched her neck to try to get the tension out. “Honey, I want you to go up to the house and watch some TV, okay? Put your left arm up on a pillow, extended a little as if you were holding the reins. We want it in that position as much as possible so your shoulder muscles heal up right.”

  “I can’t ride today?” she asked, more concerned about missing a ride than permanent damage.

  Jackie smiled weakly, brushing a strand of hair behind Sarah’s ear. “Not today. We’re going to play it safe and give you the day off. But to make it up to you, I’m going to call your house and let them know that I’m keeping you here for a sleepover.”

  “Really?” Sarah’s eyes brightened considerably at the prospect of a sleepover at the barn. She lived in a mansion but got excited about sleeping out with the horses. Apparently her father had done something right because her mother was useless.

  “Really. Now, go relax!” Jackie shooed her off then closed the door firmly before turning the lock. She was going to make that call and lie through her teeth about Sampson having colic and Sarah needing to stay overnight so she could learn the responsibilities that owning a horse would entail. She knew Mrs. Baldwin or whatever her name was now wouldn’t question Jackie’s decision. She was an airhead. Worse than that, she was a bad mother.

  Jackie’s hands started to shake and she gripped the edge of her desk, closing her eyes as she did so. Sarah was being hurt. Her Sarah. Because she’d gotten stuck with a selfish bitch of a mother… It was too much, too close to home. Even though her eyes were closed she could see her own mother’s face, swollen after all the weight she’d gained and made harsh by wrinkles. The memory of her icy hazel gaze burned. A rage and hate that refused to stay buried fought its way to the surface.

  She didn’t realize what that ringing noise was at first. Her head was spinning; her throat was raw. She wanted to put her fist through something. Jackie took several deep breaths, collecting all her ragged emotions and tucking them neatly away. She thought at least her voice would be steady as she leaned over her desk and grabbed the phone. “Free Spirit Ranch, how may I help you?”

  “What’s wrong?”

  Jackie blinked and stood up straighter, surprised by the voice on the other end of the phone. “Mr. O’Connor, why are you calling me?”

  “When I sense an overwhelming homicidal rage in one of my donors, I get a little concerned,” he replied dryly. “Now tell me what’s wrong.” Jackie pinched the bridge of her nose.

  “You’ve got to be kidding me. You know what I’m feeling?”

  “Only intense emotions and I have to be… Yes, I can sense your emotions,” Liam said, clearing his throat. But he was too late. Jackie wasn’t about to let him off the hook now.

  “You have to be what, O’Connor? Were you going to say paying attention?”

  “I was bored,” he said calmly as if that made everything all right. It was only half of the truth. He did bore easily but he had made a habit of checking on Jacquelyn for no apparent reason. Boredom had nothing to do with it - quite the opposite, in fact.

  “Maybe I was angry because someone keeps invading my privacy every night,” she hinted darkly. He chuckled.

  “No, that’s not it. There’s no point in not telling me, I’ll just find out later.” Jackie rolled her eyes.

  “Fine,” she relented. The more people who knew what a bastard Sarah’s stepfather was the better. Maybe she should put an ad in the paper about it. “I was angry because my student’s stepfather dislocated her shoulder with a coffee table. It just got worse when she told me her mom insisted it was an accident. Apparently she got in the way. You know, a sort of kids will be kids thing. I guess things have changed since I was young. I don’t remember getting in the way of a parent’s murderous rampage being a real popular thing back then.” Unable to resist, she slammed her fist into the desk. The quick shot of pain didn’t banish the phrase ‘got in the way’ quite as well as she’d wanted. Got in the way. As if she deserved what happened to her. As if it was her fault.

  “Would you like me to have him killed?” Her anger gave way to shock. Jackie opened her mouth, hesitated, and then closed her mouth again as she thought about what he’d said. If it were anyone else, she’d probably agree and know she wasn’t being taken seriously. This wasn’t anyone else. This was Liam O’Connor and he might very well kill Sarah’s stepfather if Jackie said yes. And would that be a bad thing? She was starting to think she should be sitting down for this conversation.

  “I’ll get back to you on that,” she finally said. Then Jackie bit her lip before deciding to ask, “Are you serious?”

  “It could look like an accident,” he offered in response. She nearly collapsed in her chair.

  “Christ, you are serious. Do you usually go around offering to kill people?”

  “Well, most donors appreciate little things like clothes and jewelry, but you strike me as the type that might want something more practical. Killing an abusive parent falls in that category for me.”

  “I guess I can respect that,” she mumbled, resting her face in her hand. Jackie should be more worried about how reasonable he sounded. She should be especially concerned about the part of her that wanted to take him up on his offer. Having him take care of her in this way wasn’t quite so objectionable as being pampered like his other donors, and it really should have been. “I think I’ll try the more traditional methods before I ask for his head on a platter.”

  “See, now, it would be difficult to make decapitation look like an accident. Manageable but difficult.” Jackie couldn’t help it, she laughed. It was a deep, uneven sound akin to a long stream of humorous hiccups. Liam somehow found himself charmed without his consent.

  “I’ll keep that in mind. Speaking of murder and vampires, you must have had an interesting week what with another body turning up without blo
od. The face was pretty badly slashed up too as I recall. Do you have a friend in town that likes attracting media attention?” she inquired. There was dead silence on the other end of the phone. “Sofie keeps me updated on the news.”

  “Isn’t that handy,” he muttered, less than thrilled. That story had been a pain in his ass from the time it broke last night. Handling the media attention without actually being seen handling it was no easy task. The delegating alone made his head ache.

  “You’re the moody sort, aren’t you?” Jackie asked, a mischievous grin curling her mouth.

  “Hardly,” he replied in an extremely dry tone of voice. She continued to smile, pleased by how she’d gotten the power back in their conversation. Jackie smoothed the hair that had worked loose from her braid back behind her head in a confident sweep.

  “Sounds moody to me. Maybe you should go cheer yourself up by snacking on Grace. Apparently you like your meals with an undercurrent of bitterness.”

  This time he was the one letting out a surprised laugh. “So you don’t like my secretary? Most of the men that come through here don’t complain.”

  “They’re no threat to her,” Jackie said. She didn’t relish the thought of explaining to Liam how women were encouraged to view each other as competition. He was undoubtedly old enough to figure this stuff out for himself.

  “Are you a threat, Jacquelyn?”

  For a moment she thought she’d caught just the faintest hint of an Irish accent when his tongue had curled around the word ‘threat’. It threw her.

  “No. Not at all.” Jackie cleared her throat. “Thanks for the call, Mr. O’Connor, but I have work to do. See you tonight.” She had learned from her mistakes and she hung up the phone the minute she finished talking. Then she frowned. She’d forgotten to tell him that Sarah was staying the night.

  Well, they’d cross that bridge when they got to it.

  Chapter Ten