Animal Instinct

by Kate Davidson

  “Why should I?”

  Jackie felt the chill of his voice on the back of her neck and it made her hair stand on end. “He’s over sixty, for one thing. Beating up an old man hardly seems fair.”

  “He let your mother have you butchered,” Liam snarled.

  Jackie turned around, her knuckles white as she gripped the stiff brush. “He caught me running away, Liam. He caught me and he gave me money. I wouldn’t have gotten away if it hadn’t been for him. Hell, I wouldn’t anything in my life right now if not for him. He put me on a horse when I was still in diapers. He taught me nearly everything I know about horses. The majority of the happy memories I have from childhood are because of him. My father is not the villain of my life story, all right? You don’t have to like the man. You don’t even have to be nice to him. But if you do anything to physically harm my father, you won’t like the consequences.”

  “I would deserve it.”

  She jerked around to face her dad who had apparently come up behind her. Liam, the vampire who had probably known the man was coming from a mile away, hadn’t said a word. She didn’t hear so much as feel him move to stand directly behind her. The move was annoyingly protective and unnecessary.

  “I wasn’t much of a father,” Charles confessed.

  “Dad, you don’t have to explain yourself to him,” she began but he cut her off.

  “But I do need to explain myself to you. I just wished I had an explanation that was worthy of you,” he said, exhaustion settling on his expression. She thought again that he looked so terribly old for his age. It began to make her feel old.

  “I know you didn’t think she was capable of what she did. I’ve never blamed you for that.” Charles shook his head, hands tensing with a sort of helpless energy.

  “I knew that she didn’t belong around children, Jane. I knew but I didn’t lift a finger to stop it.”

  Liam frowned. “Jane?”

  She winced. Damn, she didn’t want to talk about this now. “I may have had my name legally changed when I was eighteen. Look, Sarah and the rest of them are going to be coming back here any second. We need to move this conversation elsewhere.” Jackie didn’t like leaving Sampson alone but he wouldn’t be alone long. She gestured for the men to follow her as she walked toward the barn.

  Liam kept up with her quick pace and whispered softly enough so only she could hear. “You didn’t think your real name was worth mentioning?”

  “Exactly how much do I know about your life?” she shot back. He avoided her glaring eyes and she pursed her lips. It irritated her that after all she’d told him she could still encounter overwhelming silence when she brought up the topic of his past. Deciding to save that argument for later, she let out a sigh. “I hate that name, okay? I don’t like hearing it. Besides, as far as I’m concerned my real name is Jackie Chase. No one else knows about this, Liam, so if you could keep it under your hat I’d appreciate it.” The vampire muttered something under his breath that she probably didn’t want to know about but other than that he didn’t cause a fuss. She was rather surprised by the fact that he was managing to keep his mouth shut. He was being courteous. How… odd.

  “What is your name now, by the way?” her father asked once they made it behind the barn. Jackie smiled.

  “Jackie Chase.”

  “Jacquelyn,” the vampire corrected. She fought the urge to glare. Liam was doing her a favor by not overreacting today. Jackie didn’t want to push him.

  “Everyone calls me Jackie,” she explained to her father who was looking at Liam with a quiet, considering expression.

  “Except your friend here.”

  “This is Liam. He’s the exception to a lot of rules.” Jackie wanted to take the words back the minute they were out of her mouth. The sentence sounded too personal, somehow. Just too… too something. “Anyway, we’re not here to talk about him. What are you doing here, Dad?” Charles slid his hands into his boot cut blue jeans and Jackie immediately knew that he was going to hold something back. It had been nearly two decades since she’d seen him but she still remembered what he did when he wasn’t saying everything that he wanted to say.

  “A friend is setting up shop down here. He needed a school master and Giacomo is about as solid as they come.” Liam held up a hand.

  “Sorry, Giacomo?”

  “He was a new colt I got to know just before I ran away. I spotted him in the barn when I was getting Sarah’s clothes. He recognized me,” she recalled, smiling a little. Liam nodded and gestured for her father to continue.

  “I decided to bring him down here myself since any time away from your mother and Alec is a blessed thing. My friend’s keeping the few horses he has here for the time being. When I heard there would be a show today I thought I’d take a look, kill a little time before I had to move on.” Jackie had been right. He wasn’t saying everything he had to say. She wasn’t going to call him out in front of Liam but it still bugged her.

  “You said it was good to get away from Alec. Is he still living at home?” Jackie asked, a little amused by the idea that her big brother was exactly where he’d been twenty years ago.

  “Your mother would never let him move out. The boy is full-grown with a steady job and he still gets all his meals at home. It doesn’t surprise me, especially after - ” He cut himself off and she knew he was about to talk about when she’d left. And, to her great surprise, she really wanted to know what that had been like.

  “How did she react when she found out I’d gone?” she asked.

  “Please don’t make me describe that time to you.”

  Jackie stared at the haunted look on her father’s face. It was as if he’d barely survived a war. Making him talk about something that had obviously been painful in front of a stranger would be cruel. It was just another thing she’d have to save for when Liam wasn’t around and those things were beginning to stack up pretty quickly. Oh, hell, she was just going to have to piss off her ‘boyfriend’ to talk to her father.

  “Could you give us a minute?” Jackie asked before pulling Liam out of her father’s earshot. He looked fairly amused by her manhandling him and she hoped that good mood would last. “Look, I need to talk to my father and it would be a lot easier without the sinister vampire hovering behind me.” Liam scowled. So much for being amused by her.

  “I do not hover and I will not leave you alone with him.”

  Jackie set her hands on her hips. “What do you think he’s going to do? Drug me? Kidnap me? Perform a medical procedure on my body he doesn’t know how to do? Been there, done that and I still haven’t gotten the t-shirt.” His scowl didn’t fade. If anything his eyes looked a few shades darker. That couldn’t be a good sign. “Liam, I am a grown woman. I’ve been looking out for myself a very long time and I do not need you to babysit me. Now, please, if you wouldn’t mind giving me some space?” She stared at him.

  Finally, after about a minute of hard eye contact, he surrendered. “I’ll go check on the snack pack, then.”

  She slapped his arm. “Her name’s Sarah.”

  “You call her honey,” Liam defended.

  Jacquelyn rolled her eyes. “That’s entirely different and you know it. Find a pet name for her that doesn’t involve how edible she is.”

  He smirked. “Fine. I’ll reserve those for you.” Liam wisely retreated after that, knowing it was best to get out while he was ahead.

  Jackie shook her head as she watched him leave. She was ridiculously fond of that vampire. God only knew why when he could be such a controlling ass. She aimed a smile at her father as she returned to him. “Sorry about that. We just had a small difference of opinion but everything’s fine now. So, er, is everyone healthy at home?” As if she gave a shit about their health. She was just desperate for a conversation starter. Now that she’d gotten rid of Liam she didn’t know how to get back to talking about what she wanted to know.

  “So you still have a little awkwardness left,�
�� her father said, a fond smile softening the lines of his face. “I’d wondered if I’d ever see the little girl I knew. This Jacquelyn Chase you’ve become seems a very impressive woman but I’m glad Jane is floating around the edges.”

  “I never knew how to talk to you,” she said, deciding to say what she needed to say and not apologize for it. “It seemed like all we had in common was horses and that was nice. Horses are great. But I didn’t understand you or mom or anything. Most of the time I wasn’t even sure if you knew I was your daughter.” He reached out to touch her and this time he had the nerve to do it. His large hands gripped her shoulders as he stared into her face with guilt in his eyes.

  “It was never about you. Do you hear? Never. I had most of the heart beaten out of me by your mother and I didn’t want to let my feelings show. Your brother was a whiner from the start. He was the spitting image of your mother and I could barely stand him. I stayed away from the two of them as much as I could. Then you came along and suddenly I was a father. I didn’t know how to love you and I didn’t want your mother to use you against me if she saw that you were my favorite.” Charles let go of her left shoulder to wipe a tear off her cheek that she hadn’t known was there.

  “Can you stay in L.A. for a while? Maybe lie about checking out some horses?” she asked, defying the threatening tightness of her throat. “I’d… I’d like to get to know you a bit. If that’s okay?”

  “Nothing would please me more,” he said.

  She smiled quickly before stepping back and clearing her throat. “So, I should introduce you to everyone. Don’t worry. Not everyone’s as intense as Liam.”

  Charles managed a half-hearted smile. “Yes, about Liam. It may not be my place to ask but… Is Liam more than a friend to you?”

  Jackie felt her cheeks heat up. “Yeah, he’s… he’s more than a friend.” She didn’t want to use the word ‘lover’ in front of her father and boyfriend was way too juvenile.

  “And you’re happy with him?”

  Jackie frowned. There was something her father wasn’t saying again. He looked conflicted. “What is it, dad?”

  Charles hesitated then let out a sigh. He drew a business card out of his pocket and handed it to her. “If you’re happy with your Liam then it’s nothing. But there may be a few loose ends you might want to tie up in your life.” He saw her eyes widen as she read the name on the card. He hoped he hadn’t made the wrong decision in giving it to her. He’d done so many things wrong. “That’s something for you to think on later. You don’t have to call. You can even burn the thing, if you like. I only thought you should have the choice.” Jackie couldn’t do anything but stare at the card for a moment. Then she blinked a few times and met her father’s eyes.

  “Thanks. I… I appreciate it. Now let’s, uh, go see what the gang’s gotten up to.” Jackie put on a determined smile before taking her father’s arm, guiding him back to her trailer.

  And she slipped Wallace’s business card into her back pocket.

  Chapter Twenty

  THERE WERE VERY FEW times when Jackie got to unwind at home. She usually had something she needed to get done that couldn’t wait. The horses needed to be worked, fed and petted so they knew the humans still loved them. The dogs would have to be fed and petted, too, as well as bathed if it was that time of the month. Her ghost of a barn cat, who was generally MIA, might appear needing food and cuddles. Sarah would need homework assistance along with mother/daughter bonding time Jackie still wasn’t sure she knew how to do. Then there were Jackie’s friends who routinely had some crisis of their own such as boyfriends or family issues. Recently she’d even had her father dropping by occasionally for awkward lunches where Jackie went about trying to sum up the last nineteen years of her life as Sofie glared at him. That was why she so appreciated the times she got to leave her house and go to Liam for ‘adult time’. She loved her life but everyone needed a break now and then. Her schedule prevented her from retreating as much as she might like but when she did get the chance, the experience was well worth the wait.

  Before Liam she’d had relatively simple tastes. She could be satisfied by a casual meal at a cheesy Mexican restaurant or snacking on buttery popcorn at a mediocre movie. Now, however, things were much different. He had made a point of spoiling her in the most conniving, subtle way. Their dating had started with the simple customs she was comfortable with such as hot dogs and casual walks without shoes. Then he’d upgraded the quality of their meals to pizzas with Scottish smoked salmon and champagne-soaked caviar, Kobe steaks and white truffle risotto. She hadn’t noticed at first or, if she had, she didn’t complain. Jackie had only recently noticed that she’d acquired the ability to taste whether or not something was expensive. The fact that he’d somehow changed her made Jackie hyperventilate a little when she had the time to think about it.

  At that moment she refused to think about it. Saturday evening had finally come around and it was Jackie’s time to relax. Although she was no longer a donor, Saturday had remained her day with Liam. It was mostly about convenience but she couldn’t help feel a little smug that no other twenty-something donor had taken her space. Not only that but the few donors who lived with Liam had been cleared out of the house along with any other staff. When he said he wanted to be alone with her, he meant it. She appreciated that.

  Jackie floated on her back in Liam’s large pool, staring up at the swiftly darkening sky. Swimming in winter was ridiculous unless one was in possession of a heated pool. Although she enjoyed swimming, even if it was more like floating for her, she felt some embarrassment about wearing her red bikini. She was a woman on the edge of thirty-eight. Her body was not what it once was. The exercise her job supplied kept her shape intact and gravity had been kind. Still, Jackie was aware that she was easing out of the prime of life. She hoped she could do it with dignity.

  Had she thought about being a vampire? Of course. A person couldn’t be around immortals regularly without wondering what it would be like to join the ranks. Jackie had already made a decision about it. She did not want to live forever. A liquid diet wouldn’t work for her and it might break her heart if animals instinctively feared her. Even so, she hoped Liam would never ask. He could be convincing when he wanted something.

  There was a sudden loud splash and Jackie inhaled water as she struggled to right herself. Coughing, she stared at the determined bloodhound paddling toward her.

  “Shylock, you nut,” she said, rubbing behind his droopy ears. “Hey, Liam, I hope you aren’t too sensitive to the smell of wet dog!”

  “I had a hunch that your lad might not be long in following you into the pool,” Liam said from somewhere behind her. She turned a little and smiled. He was standing in the sunken bar, probably still working on whatever it was that was supposed to rock her taste buds next. A few badly done breaststrokes got her to the granite bar and she sat on the stools that had been installed at the shallow end of the pool. Jackie had a stray thought about how much fun Sarah’s next birthday might be if they had it in Liam’s pool. There was plenty of room on the patio for dogs and kids and friends. Then she remembered that all the room was intended for scantily clad women, not family parties, and she brought that train of thought to a halt.

  “I’m sorry about Shylock. He needed to be around me today for some reason and when I started to leave without him he gave me the most heartbreaking look.” The dog being discussed settled on the stool beside Jackie, put his head on the bar and stared at Liam with mournful eyes. She pointed at his expression. “That’s the look, right there.”

  Liam smiled. “Who would have guessed that you were a sucker for puppy dog eyes?”

  “I have way too many dogs not to be a sucker for puppy dog eyes,” she said. Jackie started to lean over the bar to get a look at whatever Liam was doing. He’d only let her have one glass of wine with dinner so she had a hunch it had to do with something alcoholic and he didn’t want her mixing liquors. That was a surefire way fo
r her to wake up with a hangover, no matter how much alcohol had actually been consumed.

  “I’ll make a note of that for the future. That might make it easier to convince you to let me buy you things.” He touched the center of her forehead with a single finger, easily pushing her back. It was times like that she wanted to know exactly how strong he was. They’d talked about vampires before but she never asked specific questions about his abilities. It seemed too show and tell for her. Besides, what other information did she really need? She knew they drank blood and it gave them a weird mystic connection to the source. She knew about sunlight and donors and fangs. Stakes to the heart were a myth. Destroying the brain and burning the body were the only ways to be sure a vampire was dead. Jackie veered away from that line of thought. Nothing was more of a buzz kill than talking about how one’s lover was a little less than human.

  “You’ve been buying a lot of things for me lately,” she protested. “Horses, children and time away to collect what’s left of my sanity. What’s jewelry compared to all that?” Liam continued to grin, setting down a shot glass filled with approximately two fingers of what Jackie guessed was whiskey. It appeared the right color to be whiskey, anyway. “So the big surprise is a drink?”

  “You’ll understand when you taste it,” he assured her. She studied the glass skeptically. She failed to see what would be so amazing about a simple shot of whiskey. However, Liam seemed pretty sure of himself. Maybe there was more to it than she knew. Without much optimism she picked up the glass and drank, allowing the potent liquid to slide down her throat. It was unlike anything she’d ever known. The whiskey had a strong wood flavor with hints of what might have been toffee and dried fruit, but it was the smooth quality that really struck her. Most hard liquors made her shiver and shake a little. This eased into her system beautifully.

  “Okay, my first guess is that this stuff is really old.”

  “It’s three years older than you are,” Liam confirmed, crossing his arms and resting his hip against the granite counter. Jackie blinked. She’d just casually swallowed forty-year-old whiskey. Where had her simple life gone?