Parker's Island

by Kimberly Schwartzmiller

  I pulled back, feeling ashamed for being caught in a hug, as if I had done some unspeakable act.

  Brian laughed and put his arm around my waist. “What’s up Mom?” he asked, pulling me closer.

  “I was just letting you know that lunch is ready. Delaney, please join us. There’s plenty.”

  “I really should go home. My parents are expecting me. Thank you for the invitation. Next time though, if you’ll have me.”

  “You’re welcome any time. I was just outside and I didn’t see your car,” she said.

  “Oh, I don’t drive. I don’t live too far from here. I’m going to walk home.”

  “Don’t be silly. Brian will give you a ride home.”

  “Yeah, I’ll give you a ride,” he said, grinning at my obvious discomfort of being caught in his room and in his mother’s presence.

  “I, I should walk. I need the exercise.”

  “Okay, I’ll walk you home, then,” Brian said, always proving to be a gentleman.

  “Brian, grab a couple of sandwiches on your way out. It was nice meeting you, Delaney. I hope we see more of you around here. You’re right Brian, she is drop-dead gorgeous, and so polite.”

  I was mortified by her comment, but Brian was completely unaffected. “Yes, she is!” he agreed unashamedly.

  He took my hand and we headed downstairs. He grabbed two sandwiches on the way out the door.

  “Oh, I’m really not hungry,” I said, seeing the second sandwich.

  “Yeah, I kind of figured that. You don’t have much of an appetite do you?” he asked, already about done with the first sandwich.

  “I think you have a big enough appetite for the both of us,” I grinned.

  “I’m a growing boy.”

  We both laughed at that. “You need to eat more, Delaney. You’re too thin. Don’t get me wrong. You’re beautiful, but thin.

  “Hmm, I thought I was drop-dead gorgeous? I’ve just been demoted to beautiful?” I teased.

  “My mom likes to embellish things,” he grinned sheepishly.

  “Your mom’s great. If my mom caught you in my room hugging me, she certainly wouldn’t have invited you to lunch!”

  “Hmmm, is that what you were doing? Hugging me? I’m just curious, because I just thought I was hugging you.”

  It was so easy being with Brian. He was so nice and funny and sensitive to all my needs. I needed some time though, “Brian, I…”

  “You don’t have to say anything, Delaney. I’m sure you need some time,” he said, as if reading my mind. “I’m not blind. I know you don’t feel for me what you do for Logan. I told you I’d wait, and I meant it.”

  “Thank you,” was all I could manage to say.

  “Can I ask you something?” Brian said.

  “Sure.”

  “You may not want to hear it, and you don’t have to tell me,” he said.

  “Boy, an uncomfortable conversation. There’s a switch,” I said jokingly, but worried about his question nonetheless.

  “It’s obvious that you like Logan and it sure seems that he likes you. So why aren’t you two together?”

  “Because he doesn’t want me to wait,” I said quickly, re-living his rejection, yet again.

  “Wait for what?”

  I realized I had almost let something slip, so I quickly covered my tracks. “He’s...going away to college and he doesn’t want me to wait for him.”

  “I don’t buy that. I know he’s crazy about you.”

  “Obviously, you’re wrong.”

  “No, I’m not.”

  “How do you know that?” I knew Logan had strong feelings for me, but he had also let me go without a second thought.

  “I’ve seen how he looks at you, Delaney. He’s in love with you.”

  I knew it hurt him to say that. “You can’t know that just by the way he looks at me.”

  “Yes I can, because I look at you the same way,” Brian said without the slightest hesitation or embarrassment.

  I stopped walking and turned to him. “Brian, I’m very confused right now. The last thing I want to do is hurt you…again.”

  “Delaney, I told you, I’m not blind. I know you love him and he loves you. So, before I make a huge ass out of myself, I need to know if he’s coming back for you.” He stood there, an open target, waiting for me to give him an answer. I didn’t have one.

  “I don’t know, I don’t think so.”

  “Fair enough.”

  We walked the rest of the way in silence. When we got to my street, I told him that I should go the rest of the way by myself. I didn’t want any more questions from my parents that I would have to lie about, and Brian would definitely entail a lot of questions.

  “You don’t want me to meet your parents?” he asked, sadly.

  “No, it’s not that. I was supposed to be with Molly at her house, all weekend. That’s why I didn’t want you to pick me up,” I said, hoping he’d understood my meaning.

  “They don’t know you went to the grad party?”

  “Not everyone has parents as understanding as yours.”

  “Oh. Well then, may I see you again?”

  “I just need a little time, okay?”

  “Okay, but don’t keep me waiting too long. My mother is going to drive me nuts until you come to dinner.”

  “I thought she invited me to lunch?” I grinned.

  “Trust me; she’s given you an open invitation. That goes for me, too.”

  “Thank you, Brian. You really are sweet.”

  “Call me soon, okay, even if it’s just to talk about…anything.”

  “Okay. Oh, I also wanted to thank you for not telling Molly about…Logan. I would never hear the end of it.”

  “Well, that was just my pride standing in the way. It certainly wasn’t a noble act.”

  “That doesn’t matter. You saved me from having to answer 200 more questions last night.”

  “Bye, Delaney,” he said, handing me my bag, sensing I should get inside.

  I reached into my bag and grabbed his jacket. I handed it to him and said, “Thank you for the use of the jacket. It really came in handy.” Much more than he knew, I realized. I touched the side of his cheek and then turned and headed home.

  The lies continued as soon as I walked in the door. My mother quizzed me about what Molly and I did the entire time I was gone. I tried to keep it generic in case I needed to reiterate the story later for my father, which, as it turned out, was exactly the case. I was so thrilled when dinner and dishes were done so I could finally lock myself in my room.

  Once there, I realized the sanctity of my room didn’t hold the comfort it always had before. Once again, I cried myself to sleep, finally allowing myself to mourn, while holding Logan’s shirt.

  Chapter Six: Brian

  The next couple of weeks passed in slow motion. Brian was very patient and left me alone to deal with my emotions. At the end of two weeks, he called. I was surprised he waited that long. I had heard nothing from Logan; that, I was not surprised about. I had cried over what Chad had done to me and over losing Logan until I was numb and just couldn’t cry anymore.

  My mother answered the phone when Brian called, and stood there while I talked to him. “Mom, do you mind?” I asked, irritated by the intrusion.

  “Oh, I’m sorry. Are we going to get to meet this young man?” she asked, waiting for an answer before she would leave.

  “Brian, would you hold on for a minute, please?” I asked.

  “Sure,” he said.

  “Mom, Brian is a nice guy, someone you and dad would definitely approve of. Please let me find out what he wants before I ask him to meet my parents,” I said.

  “Alright, I’m sorry. I’m just excited for you,” she said, finally walking downstairs.

  “Sorry about that.”

  “So then, am I?”

  “Are you what?” I asked, confused.

  “Going to meet your parents?” he asked, trying to embarrass me.

&n
bsp; “Maybe,” I said, suddenly finding the sound of his voice very comforting. I couldn’t believe it, but I realized I had really missed him.

  “You mean it?” he asked, seriously now.

  I was resolved to not spend the rest of the summer locked up in my room. I needed to have some fun. Brian was a great guy, and if I couldn’t have Logan, then I had to move on.

  “That all depends?”

  “On what?” he asked.

  “On whether or not you’re going to ask me out again; that is, if you still want…”

  “How about tonight?” he asked, taking the lead before I could finish my sentence.

  “Um, let me ask, okay?”

  I ran downstairs and asked my mom if we had any plans for that evening. “No dear, why?” she asked, smiling like she already knew what I was going to say, and of course, she did.

  “Um, I guess I have a date,” I said, actually a little excited about seeing Brian again.

  “Are we going to meet this young man, first?” she asked.

  “Yes, Mom. I’ll invite him in before we go out. Okay?”

  “Okay,” she said, grinning uncontrollably.

  I told Brian that I would be ready when he picked me up that night.

  “I’ll be there at 6:00 sharp,” he said, obviously excited.

  I hung up the phone and headed back to my room. I sat down on my bed and slowly pulled Logan’s shirt out from under my pillow. I closed my eyes and breathed deeply. It no longer held his scent, and I realized I was holding on to something I couldn’t have. I folded the shirt that I had worn to bed every night since I got back and I put it in the bottom drawer of my dresser. “It’s time to move on, Delaney!” I told myself, opening my closet to figure out what I was going to wear that night…the first night of my new life.

  True to his word, Brian showed up at my door at exactly 6:00 pm. And, just as I had imagined, he immediately won over both of my parents. They loved him, even my dad. I stood there, watching this perfect guy charm my entire family in a matter of minutes. By the time we left, I think my parents would have given them my hand in marriage.

  “How did you do that?” I asked him once we were in his car.

  “Do what?”

  “Make my parents love you. My parents don’t even like ME that much!” I said, almost believing it.

  “Well, I like you enough for both of them.”

  “I’ve missed you,” I said, knowing it was true.

  “Good, because I was going crazy being away from you.”

  “Brian, I don’t know exactly how I feel about…anything, but I do know that I’ve missed you. I’m not making any promises though, okay?”

  “I’ll take this as slowly as you want, Delaney. I won’t rush you and I won’t ask you for anything that you’re not ready to give.”

  “Thank you,” I said. We never talked about Logan, but I was sure Brian knew that he was in the back of my mind.

  We met Molly and Jason at a local hot spot. “I thought it was going to be just you and me?” I asked, surprised that he would want to share our first date together with anyone else.

  “I thought you’d be more comfortable if you were with Molly.”

  “I’m comfortable with you.”

  “Do you want to leave?” he asked.

  “No. I just don’t want you to think that you have to include Molly every time we go out.”

  “So, you’re saying we can go out again?”

  “That depends.”

  “On what?”

  “On what your mom’s serving for dinner?”

  “You tell me what you want, and she’ll make it,” he grinned.

  “Well, I did promise.”

  “Tomorrow too soon?” he asked.

  We had a nice evening, and Brian was right. I did feel more comfortable sharing the evening with Molly and Jason. I still didn’t completely trust Jason, but he did seem to be on his best behavior and we all spent the evening laughing and enjoying ourselves.

  Brian brought me home, walked me to the door and told me he had a great time.

  “I did too,” I smiled.

  I know he wanted to kiss me, but he took my keys from my hand, opened my door and waved me inside. “Goodnight, Delaney. Thank you for a wonderful evening.”

  I woke up the next morning to a knock on my bedroom door.

  “Delaney, Brian is on the phone for you,” my mom called from the hallway.

  “What time is it?” I asked, knowing it had to be early. I felt exhausted, like I hadn’t slept at all.

  “It’s 9:30,” she said.

  “Really? Wow, it can’t be that late already. I’ll be right there.”

  “Hi.” I said groggily.

  “Hi. Did I wake you?”

  “No. Well, actually I over-slept. I never sleep this late.”

  “Really, it’s early for me. I usually sleep later than this, but I missed you.”

  “Hmm,” I said, waiting for him to get to the point.

  “So, my mom wants to know what you want for dinner. If you don’t have a favorite, she makes the best Chicken Cordon Bleu you’ve ever tasted.” He wasn’t about to let me off the hook.

  The mention of food instantly made me ill. I took a few deep breaths, trying to ease the nausea. “Um, anything she makes will be fine. I’m not really feeling very well right now, Brian. Can I talk to you later?” I asked, trying to hold back the bile.

  “Are you okay?”

  “Oh yeah, I’m fine,” I said, suddenly feeling perfectly well. That was weird, I thought. “What time should I be ready? Or, should I just walk to your house?”

  “I’ll pick you up.”

  “You just want to charm my parents again.”

  “No, I want to charm you.”

  “You are charming.”

  “Good. See you at 5:30.”

  Dinner with his family was a lot of fun. He was an only child and his parents obviously adored him. Their affection was very open. I suddenly wished I had a better relationship with my parents. I know they loved me and I was very lucky to have them, but Brian really talked to his parents, and they obviously listened.

  “So, are you planning on going to college, Delaney?” Brian’s mother asked me during dinner.

  “I’m not really sure. I’ve been accepted to a few universities, but I’m not sure where I really want to go.”

  “Where have you been accepted?” Brian asked.

  I went through the list of the colleges I was considering and I watched Brian make mental notes.

  “Brian, don’t you have some scholarships at a few of those schools as well?” his mother asked, grinning.

  I sat there very quietly, feeling as if I were being set up.

  Christine looked at me and said, “Delaney, we’re just teasing you,” she smiled.

  The rest of the evening was spent in good humor. I really loved his parents. They were so easy-going and so easy to talk to.

  Brian and I offered to do the dishes for Christine, but she refused and sent us on our way to, “go have some fun.”

  “How about a walk?” Brian asked me.

  “I’m really kind of tired. I don’t think I’m sleeping very well. I even wake up tired lately.”

  “Okay, how about watching a movie then?”

  “Here?”

  “Yeah, unless you’d rather go out to one?”

  “No, here’s fine.”

  He led me upstairs to his room. “Where are we going?” I asked, uncomfortable being alone in his room.

  “To my room to watch a movie. I have a lot of movies. You can choose whichever one you want.”

  “Your room?” I asked.

  “Why not?”

  “Your parents…”

  “They won’t care,” he smiled.

  “I’m not really comfortable…”

  “Delaney, you can sit on my bed and I’ll sit on a chair next to the bed. I won’t touch you, I promise.”

  “I trust you, Brian. It’s not that. It j
ust doesn’t look good.”

  “We’ll leave the door open.”

  “Brian, my parents wouldn’t approve, even if yours would.”

  “Okay, I’m sorry. We’ll watch it in the family room.”

  “Thanks.”

  We sat on the couch and laughed through a comedy. I felt silly sitting at opposite ends of the couch, so after a trip to the bathroom I sat down next to him. He looked over at me and smiled. “May I?” he asked, putting his arm around my shoulders.

  “Yes.” He was so good to me and I found myself snuggling up against him. The next thing I knew, Brian was shaking me awake. “I’m sorry. I guess I’m not very good company tonight.”

  “You’re just tired. I’ll take you home so you can get some sleep. Can I see you tomorrow?”

  “Maybe,” I looked up at him and grinned.

  “Um, I think we better go, now,” he said.

  “Is it late?”

  “No, but I….I want to kiss you and I know you’re not ready for that, so let’s go,” he said, standing up and holding out his hand for me.

  “I’m sorry, I’m just…”

  “Don’t apologize, it’s okay. I told you, I’ll wait. I’ve just been watching you sleep for an hour now and I…um, I just think I should take you home.”

  “Oh, okay. I’m still tired, anyway,” I said, feeling like I had done something to make him angry. “Did I do something wrong?” I asked, not really quite sure what.

  “No, Delaney, of course not. You’re just too beautiful for your own good…and you still think I’m a gentleman. If you stay, I’m not so sure you will,” he said, candidly.

  “You are a gentleman, Brian. I know that,” I said, reaching for his hand.

  He closed his eyes and said, “We have to go.”

  He took me home then, walked me to the door and opened it for me. “Goodnight Delaney. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

  “Are you sure you’re not mad at me?” I asked, noticing his distance.

  “No, why would you think that?”

  “I don’t know. You just seem like you can’t wait to get away from me.”

  “That couldn’t be further from the truth. I want to get close to you, Delaney, and I know you’re not ready for that, so it’s just better that I bring you home. I don’t want to put any pressure on you and I will wait, but you’re just way too tempting tonight…for your own good. Goodnight,” he said and headed back to his car.