Protectors and Kings (Mists of the Fae Book 4)

by Jaime Marks

  The words came out on a rush, his voice so shaky he hardly recognized it as his own. “I, I destroyed her. She’s my sister but I forced myself on her, sating myself on her flesh and once I had my fill I held her down while the Brood tore her apart in their pleasure at my command. We left her in a bloody heap and I couldn’t stand to see the suffering that I caused her. She is my blood.” He stammered locked in the Supryn’s gaze, fear choking him. “I, I knew my orders, I knew I was to leave her to her fate in that dungeon, but I couldn’t. I’d caused that damage to her and I needed to fix it. I tended her wounds, cared for her until she regained consciousness. As soon as she could manage it I cleared the path for her escape. I ensured she evaded the Brood, Supryn. I’ve failed my sire and betrayed my rank.” His body shook. He had no idea how he had remained on his feet there was no strength left in him.

  “Who ordered you to take her, to make an example of her, boy? Did you act of your own volition?” The Supryn demanded.

  His voice was low and hoarse, barely audible. “No, my Supryn. It was Trevyn’s decree. A punishment for allowing herself to be whored out at the hands of her Mother. For desecrating the purity that my Father demands of his female born, but it wasn’t her fault. Her Mother made that choice. It was her Mother who had destroyed her worth, not Felycia.”

  “Trevyn tells me you defied him. That it was the first time you had challenged his order since your youth. The first weakness you have ever presented him.”

  “I, I.” He tried to back pedal but there was nowhere to go and the ire in the Supryn’s gaze intensified at his weakness. “Yes, Supryn. I defied my sire’s orders. I refused to lay a hand on Felycia. If Trevyn hadn’t beaten me, if he had not drawn my essence I wouldn’t have complied.” Fear and shame coursed through him. “I’ll submit to your retribution my Grandsire. I have shamed myself and our line.”

  Cymeryn’s features eased and his hands rested on his shoulders. “Breathe, Byryn.”

  He shook his head in confusion as the room around them came back into focus. Reality slowly coming back into clarity. He shifted and realized his back was up against Marcus who supported the entirety of his weight. Their essence flowed over him. Disoriented he looked around in an attempt to reacclimate himself with the present. Grifyn stood beside him with his hand on his arm. What happened?

  “I apologize, Byryn.” Cymeryn spoke softly, reassurance flowing through him as Marcus and Grifyn moved him carefully to the couch. “I did not realize when I pushed you that it would cause you to get pulled into your mind.”

  “I…how?” Byryn looked around trying to understand what the hell was going on.

  Cymeryn stood in front of him looking him over. “When I approached you, as best as I can figure, it triggered some fear that you harbored within you of being brought before me for your actions. At first I meant to draw you out of it, but your guilt and shame were so profound, I was unable to do so. I had to cause you to face the pain of what you had done and the confusion that it had caused in you first.”

  Byryn nodded slowly and ran his hand through his hair. “You already knew though, didn’t you, Cymeryn?”

  He grimaced but nodded. “Trevyn’s rage had beckoned me. Crytos had gone back and retrieved her Mother. We held her at bay, forcing her to witness her daughter’s contrition before sating our needs with her.”

  Byryn paled at the admission turning from him. His voice was shallow and raspy and he reached up to find his cheeks wet from tears he had apparently shed in reality. “I never even knew you were there, Cymeryn.”

  “You were lost in your rage, Byryn. Trevyn pushed you to your limit and set you lose on the girl. You were so far gone once he wounded you that blood streamed from your throat to the point that we were unsure you would even live and still the adrenalin carried you through your actions,” Cymeryn offered. “It was how your fate was decided in truth. If you had presented any further weakness you would have been sold off as a slave. Crytos was hoping for it. But had you presented further defiance, Trevyn would have destroyed you. We could not allow you to challenge him with such strength. He was after all second only to me. Your strength and depravation in that moment saved your life. Remember the truth of it Byryn. You knew I was there.”

  “You had no choice Byryn, you weren’t given one, son.” Grifyn added shaking him slightly. “You need to stop allowing it to rule you.”

  He shook his head and looked to the floor.

  Cymeryn crossed his arms studying him and he looked up into that penetrating stare. He had to shake himself remembering how it felt to bear the scrutiny of that gaze just a few moments ago. “Byryn, I know your fears, I was in your mind. She needs you, you cannot allow this to keep you from her. She will fall deeper into his grasp if you pull away from her.”

  “You’ve shown her your mind before, Byryn. If you are afraid there are things that will change what she feels for you, show her. You can’t make this decision for her. She loves you and she deserves to know you are torturing yourself over what her reaction will be,” Marcus added.

  “Reaction to what?” She stood there in the door with her arms crossed watching them. There was concern and fear running through her but her face remained calm and composed.

  Kylion stood beside her looking at him with an odd expression. He walked over and touched his face and his voice was quiet and uncertain. “Are you okay, Dad? Did something bad happen?”

  Byryn gathered his son in his arms seeking the comfort that having him close brought him. He held her gaze and reached a hand up for her. Marcus rose as she came over, offering her his seat and she sat beside him. “No Kylion everything’s alright, son. It’s just been a…rough afternoon.” She looked at him with questions in her eyes and he pulled her to him kissing her chastely.

  “Spend some time with your family, Byryn. When you are ready, come to me. I may know where to find who you seek.” Cymeryn nodded and met Marcus’ eyes. “We will see you all at meal.”

  They misted out without giving him the opportunity to respond. Kato nodded to them but silently excused himself and Grifyn came over and gently pulled Kylion from his arms. “Hey rascal, let’s go get Grandma Trina and get you ready for dinner, hmm?”

  Kylion looked at him for direction. “Go ahead son, we’ll meet you there.”

  Grifyn tickled him and his face brightened. “Okay Dad, bye Mom.”

  They sat silently watching them go. “He called me Dad, baby? Did you hear that?” It brought him a small measure of peace. “And he called you Mom. I never thought he would actually call me Dad though.”

  She let out a long breath before she turned to him. “I know. He loves you Byryn, and so do I. Baby, please tell me what’s wrong? I’ve never seen you like this.”

  He had hoped he’d be able to use the moment with Kylion to distract her but he should know better. Breathing deeply he tried to gather his thoughts as he watched her, tracing her features. Her beautiful spiraled curls framed her face in a deep mahogany. Her skin was now a very a pale peach but there was always a slight natural blush to her high, round cheeks. The light tones of her skin and deep hues of her hair made her lips seem almost rouge in the dim Light of the room. The vibrancy of her hazel eyes danced with blue and green hues. He wanted to wake up to see her by his side every morn for the rest of her life but once she knew…

  “Just some ghosts of the past, Brightness. Come here. I just need to hold you a moment, I’ll be alright.”

  She allowed him to pull her into his arms and he caressed her savoring in the feel of her. He knew he should tell her the fear he held, but he just couldn’t bring himself to do so yet. He would have to before she awakened, but even there he was running out of time. He’d have to tell her soon, but in this moment, he just couldn’t bear the thought of losing her.

  Chapter 24

  Grifyn sat quietly beside Trina in the Queen’s chambers as they shared meal with the others. Steph had been quiet and subdued the entire eve and still would not look at him. His sister h
ad made it quite clear that she was also irritated with him for the current issues with the girl. Byryn was putting on a good show but he was more distant that usual, though graciously he did not believe his son’s issues were really about him.

  He wished he was in a position to help Byryn deal with his guilt but he had to come to terms with his guilt on his own. Only he could face his fears and free himself of the chains that bound him. It was something the trials taught you, how to come to terms with the actions you took during war. There were always things that you had to do in the heat of battle, choices you made to protect those you loved or the race that could be viewed in multiple angles. As a Guardian they taught you that if you did not find a way to accept the means you were often required to use, the Darkness of it would swallow you whole.

  In a way that had to be even more of an issue for the Redeemed. Their actions were often necessary in their world, or in the least commonplace and widely acceptable, but in many cases they had lost themselves in the acts. Sometimes they had even acted of their own accord, taking pleasure in their Darkness. Many of them struggled greatly with their guilt as they reconciled who they once were with who they were now becoming.

  The girls erupted in giggles and Byryn smiled the first genuine smile he had all eve as he watched them. “No, no, no, that’s not what happened.” Steph laughed.

  “Yes it is.” Star smirked. “You can spin it anyway way you want but you tripped him on purpose.”

  She shrugged, “He was being a dick. There was no reason for him to do that to Mitchell and if someone was going to kick his ass I wasn’t gonna watch him run out the back.”

  “As I remember it, you didn’t just trip him,” Byryn mused with a grin. “You kneed him in the balls and knocked him on his ass. You’re probably lucky that Shane got to him before he got up. I was surprised that he never tried to retaliate.”

  Her demeanor shifted suddenly as she stared off in the distance. “Nick knew better than to fuck with me.”

  Byryn studied her glancing between her and his plate a moment before changing the subject. “Well you shouldn’t have to deal with any of that here. Hey Marcus, do you have the files on the unawakened the patrols brought in?”

  Marcus levelled him with a mildly annoyed look and reached over pulling the files from the end table. “You need a study or an office, Byryn. I am not your messenger service.”

  Taking them he smiled sheepishly but didn’t comment. Why he so adamantly refused an office they hadn’t a clue. He insisted on using the library. “With the positions you hold you really should have your own study. The Guardians have no idea where to send files and missives,” Grifyn added.

  Skimming over the files he waved them off. “I’ll never be there. My place is in the halls, not tied to a desk. I don’t know any of these guys. I’ll run the names by Trycen and go down to meet with them tonight so they can get them situated. I don’t really see an issue though.”

  “Have you met with the siblings I sent to you yet?” He requested curious as to what they may have revealed to him. There was something oddly familiar about them. “Lysa and Axyl Avyian?”

  “Actually no, Lysa wasn’t feeling well and they insist on meeting with me together.” Byryn rubbed his brow as he looked up setting the files down. “Honestly I think they’re avoiding me. The guards said they were skittish. I might give them a few days to settle in and see that we’re not going to hurt them for themselves. There are a couple that I still need to meet with like that. As long as they pass by the initial screenings I don’t see any purpose I rushing them into anything. They just need time.”

  Cymeryn nodded, “Just be sure to sense all of them thoroughly. I wish to sit with you and discuss your procedures. I am certain they are more than adequate but I want to attempt to ascertain some protocols for the Guardians to utilize and I would appreciate your input.”

  “Just let me know when you’re ready.”

  “Reya, my love you need to eat,” Marcus prompted.

  “I’m really not hungry.”

  Cymeryn sighed getting up and made a small plate of mainly breads. “Here, perhaps this will help to settle your stomach. You know Sanytia said part of the issue is your diet or lack thereof.”

  With a huff she nibbled on a small piece. “Fine.”

  Everyfae seemed to be mildly on edge but it had been a long day. Kato cleared his throat pulling all of their attention. “The tension in this room is palpable. All of you are dealing with issues in your own right but you must set them aside. In allowing these issues to consume you, you are allowing the forces that work against you power and control over you. Look around this room. See the miracles that are embodied herein. There is nothing that you cannot overcome together.”

  “He is right. We need to stop allowing the stress to drown us. In this life anything can happen and we all know it better than most, which is why we must cherish every moment we have together,” Cymeryn offered pulling Reyana close as he kissed her head. “We have much more to celebrate than we have to grieve. The three of us are together, actually united. Steph has returned home to us and she and Mythos have found one another.” They all smiled in amusement as she blushed ducking her head slightly. “Byryn, you and Staryana are both here safe, together and considering the last few days we all know this is something to be grateful for. Yet we all sit here as if the world is falling down around us.”

  The mood in the room slowly alleviated as the normal banter resumed. Grifyn sat back adding odd comments and smiling though it felt as though he were a million miles away. Cymeryn and Kato were right in many ways, but he needed to find some way to right the wrongs he had done.

  Mythos was likely still irritated with him. He had absolutely no idea how to repair the strain between he and Steph. It was not something he could leave go unaddressed however. At the same time if he pushed Steph right now it would only make matters worse. No, he would give her the space she needed as Byryn had suggested.

  Trina squeezed his thigh under the table and his mood lightened as he turned to her. She would likely never understand how much she meant to him all these years, how in so many ways she had saved him from falling into Darkness but he honestly didn’t know where he’d be if not for her.

  “I’m sorry, Trina, I know I am distant this eve and you deserve my attention.” Grifyn conceded as he took her hand, kissing it. “How was your noon?”

  Speaking quietly as she leaned close to him she murmured in his ear and he smiled knowing she knew he could never resist having her so close. “It was fine, except that I could feel the turmoil that plagues my mate clearly. Why don’t we retire for the eve, my love? I wish to find some way to ease your thoughts.”

  Pulling her into a chaste kiss he felt as if he breathed in her serenity. It was always thus with them. Trina had the ability to heal his every wound. After Demytria had been taken and his parents had fallen soon after he had been a mess. Only his rage carried him on. How he had not turned he was uncertain but in a way that may only have been avoided out of the sheer need to not become his enemy. At any rate he had persevered.

  It was not until the Cerulyions had fallen that he had literally broken in a way. It was why he took the assignment to Earth. Returning to the fronts after their loss only enhanced his rage. It felt as if he bathed in the blood of his enemies. He’d tried a Sector Command post, leading the remnants of the Luxyn, serving closely at Devyn’s side but nothing slaked the rage and pain he’d felt.

  After a few cycles he’d known how close to the edge he truly was. It felt like Darkness was suffocating him. If he’d returned to the fronts he had no doubt that he would’ve either gotten himself killed or submerged himself so deeply in his rage and hatred that he feared he wouldn’t have been able to pull himself back. Instead he’d chosen to take a tour as an Auxylium’s Guard.

  Trina was a Guardian but she was also a Fae of the Forest trained in guiding and protecting humanity. She was serving as an Auxylia, what humans likely termed a guardian ange
l, when he met her. Fae were never assigned to Earth alone, even if they were fully trained. Generally they worked in pairings of Auxylium and Guardians, living together in the colonies for the duration of their assignments. He had been assigned as her Guardian, tasked with keeping her safe while she performed her duties. He may have protected her, but it was her Light that had saved him.

  Staring into her eyes now he knew that he had been pushing her away to deal with his own shortcomings and it was something he needed to rectify. As he cupped her cheek she leaned into his touch. She was the greatest gift.

  “I am sorry that my frustrations have burdened you so, lumyna. You know you are ever my Light. I perhaps should have sought your counsel before I allowed this to get so out of hand.”

  He pulled her up by the hand and bowed to the table. “Tomorrow is a long day my friends. I apologize for the tensions that I’ve caused this eve. I hope in time we can correct this and put it behind us.” Steph barely looked at him as he spoke but his gaze rested predominantly on her. He wouldn’t push but it was his promise. “We are going to turn in early. Good eve.”

  “Good eve Grifyn, and do not worry so about such things. We all make mistakes and need to reason them through at times,” Kato inclined his head.

  “Indeed,” Cymeryn mused. “At any rate we will see you in the morn. Sleep well.”

  He bowed to the Kings, Queen and Steph before taking his leave. When they reached the hall he pulled her close, kissing her passionately as he forced her against the wall. “Trina, you have no idea how badly I need to feel you this eve.”

  Her soft gasps were always an amazing temptation. They had become so used to hiding their affection for each other these past few years that it was a habit, even amongst their family. They were affectionate and loving but it was limited and they both generally saved such moments until they were alone.