Brightest As We Fall

by Cleo Peitsche

  He shared info on the Jack Rebels. Not just the things he’d seen firsthand but also what he’d heard about how they moved drugs up the East Coast. Now he understood why the gang used nicknames. But Jason knew a few real names, and he gave them up.

  Finally, he ratted out Parauda. That was his ace card.

  “Let me interrupt briefly,” Cindy said. “Parauda offered himself as a liaison between AJ and law enforcement?”

  “Correct. We believed he was ex-military and had contacts in law enforcement. I now know he was working undercover and playing both sides. He might claim that he was always undercover, but I saw him initiate illegal activities, including soliciting drugs for resale, selling drugs, frequenting prostitutes, leaking information to AJ’s organization that led to the deaths of multiple people, and requesting payoffs to get AJ’s competitors arrested. Once, while high on cocaine, he shot and killed a courier, unprovoked. I have reason to believe that courier was working undercover, and Parauda knew.”

  Cindy gasped. Her eyes glittered like diamonds. “That’s excellent, Jason.”

  “One more thing. There’s a manhunt for me, but witnesses can place me on the other side of the country at the time of the attacks.”

  Cindy hadn’t wanted him to mention this, but Jason figured that even if he couldn’t get a great deal, maybe he could succeed in being removed from the Most Wanted list.

  There was one more person he wanted to see caught in the net, but that had nothing to do with his present deal.

  Auntie Love would get what was coming to her through an anonymous phone call. Jason didn’t consider himself a snitch—he was being very careful about who he implicated in his statement—but anyone who went after DeeAnn was going to pay. Auntie Love had derailed DeeAnn’s life. It wasn’t just revenge but also stopping the woman from exploiting other innocent people.

  Jason only regretted that leaving his criminal lifestyle behind meant passing up the opportunity to kill Auntie Love himself. Knowing she would be locked up was a sufficient consolation prize.

  “Great,” Cindy said, glancing at her watch. “I’ve got a meeting in five minutes with a paying client.”

  “Thank you,” Jason said.

  She nodded. “Oh, I meant to tell you. Right before you started ‘killing’ people, Toby woke up.”

  “He’s awake?”

  “He was awake. Now he’s a corpse. Whoever you pissed off is tying up loose ends. Don’t do anything brainless in the next few hours.” She disconnected.

  Jason verified that the VPN still showed green, then closed the laptop and stepped out of the car. The call had taken over an hour, but he felt like he’d aged a decade.

  DeeAnn was now standing at her table, waiting for him to give a sign.

  Holding her gaze, he nodded once.

  Chapter 56

  Even though I want to race out of the café, I carefully fold the newspaper and return it to the table where I found it. I flipped through the entire thing twice but didn’t absorb a single word.

  All I could do was scrutinize Jason’s face as he talked. And he talked a lot. Never had I imagined he would have so much information. Though for all I know, he was just giving minute details.

  Yeah, better to believe that.

  He meets me at the door, and I throw my arms around him.

  “Almost free,” he murmurs into my hair.

  I won’t let myself cry. Jason is the one with the target on his back. He’s the one risking prison time, if not his life.

  “What next?” I ask.

  “We’ve got four hours before I contact Cindy again. Presumably, we’ll be shaking hands with a U.S. Marshal soon after. So, what would you like to do? Because we can’t hang around here.” He glances around.

  I’m secretly glad he’s still a little jumpy. It makes my own fear and paranoia feel reasonable.

  “We never visited the Grand Canyon,” I say, following him to the car. “That’s my whole bucket list.”

  “Your bucket list is one item long?” Jason stares at me as if I’m an alien.

  “How long is yours?”

  He squints in thought. “At least fifty things.”

  “Like what?”

  “Go to the top of the tallest building in the world. Learn to play guitar. Race a race car on a track.”

  “Well, I don’t like heights, and my fingers are probably too stubby for guitars. More driving, Jason? Really?” I shudder for effect.

  Jason grins. “What about being a kindergarten teacher? Wasn’t that on your bucket list? The car’s unlocked, by the way.”

  “That’s different,” I tell him as we open our doors. “That’s a goal. Well, it was, but I don’t think I have enough patience.”

  “Trust me, you do. What about regrets?”

  I think about his question as I drop into my seat. “I regret I couldn’t spend more time with my dad. Stuff like that. But nothing I can change. What do you regret?”

  “Absolutely nothing.”

  “Nothing? Really?”

  “At this exact moment, no. Seatbelt.”

  Rolling my eyes, I buckle my seatbelt. I can’t think of a single way to spend four hours. At least, nothing extraordinary comes to mind.

  “I got it,” Jason says with a sly grin. He consults his phone, then pulls out of the parking lot.

  We drive for almost an hour. First a highway, then to regular roads, then smaller roads, and now we’re on an unpaved dirt path.

  The car isn’t designed for this. Jason drives carefully, slowly. Sometimes we’re tilting left or right. The suspension groans and complains.

  Just when I’m about to ask how much farther, the path yields to a meadow. A metal lookout tower, rusty from neglect, sits on the meadow’s edge. The design is like someone clobbered together scaffolding and oversized shipping pallets.

  “Here we are.” Jason cuts the engine.

  “Um… This is amazing?” I say.

  “No faith in me after all this time.” He shakes his head in disappointment. We both know I have nothing but faith in him, so I don’t fall for it.

  “My butt hurts. I’m really not in shape for long drives anymore.”

  At the mention of my butt, a familiar gleam reaches Jason’s eyes. Just like that, I’m on board for whatever he has in mind.

  Holding hands, fingers intertwined, we walk through the fragrant, grassy meadow. Wildflowers brush against my ankles and shins.

  I flash back to the day of the shootout, to a different field, a lifetime ago.

  Jason squeezes my hand and smiles at me. The memory drifts away on the breeze.

  I’m so happy.

  Too bad there’s no blanket in the car. “Maybe we can fool around in the tower,” I say.

  “Really?” Jason stares at me. “You think I brought you out here to have sex in that thing?”

  Frowning, I look around. Big meadow, trees. I look up, wondering if a plane is writing something in the sky, though what, I can’t possibly imagine; we’re already married.

  “Let’s have sex in the tower,” Jason says with a sigh. He’s fighting a smile.

  The tower might have been silver once, but now it can only be described as gray. I thought it was metal, but it’s mostly wood, painted.

  I begin climbing the stairs, placing my feet carefully at first even though the structure appears sturdy despite its worn appearance.

  At the first landing, I look over the side. My breath catches in my throat.

  “It’s not the Grand Canyon,” Jason says, “but it’s the best I can offer on short notice.”

  I thought the field was three times wider than it actually is, but the grass ends not far beyond the tower.

  A big hole gapes in the ground. Big being relative; this compared to the Grand Canyon is like a speck of glitter compared to the Milky Way.

  I start laughing. “What is this place?”

  “Abandoned quarry,” Jason says. “I thought it would be filled with water. Behold the power of droughts.”r />
  New trees are growing down the sides of the quarry. “Why build a tower here?” I ask.

  “Someone had ambitions for this place, once upon a time.”

  We’re standing so close that I have to tilt my head back to meet Jason’s eyes. “Shall we continue?”

  “Think you can handle the height?”

  I’m laughing before Jason even finishes the sentence, and he’s laughing, too.

  “Keep up!” I dart past him, run up the stairs. A glance over my shoulder confirms that he’s following, and my small advantage is almost gone.

  At the second landing, I barely glance over the side before continuing. Jason catches me, sweeps me into his arms, and tackles the final flight of stairs.

  Squealing, I grab at the handrail, then think better of it—I don’t want a palmful of splinters.

  Jason and I emerge into sunlight. He lets me slide down his body, then steps away, a cocky smile playing across his face. He knows what he’s doing, turning me on and then making me wait.

  We both look around. The floor is warped from the elements, but there’s no trash or graffiti. I guess the location is so remote, even the local kids can’t be bothered.

  I lick my lips. “This level extends farther over the quarry, doesn’t it?”

  “Yeah, I think so.” Jason approaches the edge, holds his hand out for me to join him.

  Tentatively, I follow. I’m not afraid of heights, but I don’t exactly love looking into the void.

  A few bigger trees grow at the bottom of the hole. “We should hike down there before we leave,” I say.

  “Good idea.”

  We sit, feet dangling. The tower is surprisingly close to the pit.

  Alarmingly close, actually.

  If I were to fall… My breath hitches.

  “How far to the bottom?” I wonder aloud.

  “Hm. Forty feet for the tower, plus another eighty feet to the bottom.” Jason stretches out on his back.

  After a moment of bravely contemplating the view, I join him to look up at the blue sky.

  There’s no need to ask how Jason knew the quarry existed. Planning escape routes, memorizing maps, that's what Jason always does when we’re in a new town for more than an hour.

  “I love you,” I say. “No matter what shitty little apartment in whatever shitty little town WITSEC gives us, I will always love you. We’ll be happy.”

  "Even if they move us to NW?"

  "Even in NW. The only state with no capital, no post offices, no airport."

  Jason lifts up on one arm to gaze down at me. His free hand gently moves wind-loosened strands of hair from my face.

  “I love you,” he says. “What you’re doing with me, I don’t know.”

  “That’s exactly how I feel about you,” I say, and swallow. “Sometimes I feel like we’re too happy. Like we got away with murder.”

  “Let’s reserve judgment on the part where we get away with it,” Jason says. “Crappy apartments are just the beginning. Entering witness protection is—”

  “Is worth it,” I insist. “We’re used to only depending on each other. It’ll be easier now because we won’t have to keep changing our identities.”

  “We can build something real.”

  “No more lying, cheating and stealing,” I say.

  “No more.”

  I stare up at the man I love and drink in the stark, masculine angles of his face. I know what his stubble feels like on my fingertips, under my exploring teeth, on my cheek, between my thighs. His scent I would recognize blindfolded, among thousands of other scents.

  “There’s one thing you can steal,” I murmur. “My heart.”

  “No.” Jason’s eyes burn with intensity. “That doesn’t interest me. I’d rather earn it.” He lowers himself to kiss me, and my heart must be pounding so hard in my ears that it overflows into the still air.

  Except it’s not my heart.

  Jason pulls back a few inches, freezes.

  Someone is coming.

  Chapter 57

  “Stay down. It’s probably just locals.” Jason rolled to his feet, already mentally preparing for a confrontation if it came to that. He was aware of the gun strapped to his ankle, but he hoped he wouldn’t have to use it.

  An old Crown Victoria bounced into view. Followed by a huge sedan covered in radio antennas.

  “Fuck,” he growled.

  DeeAnn scrambled to her feet. “No,” she said, taking in the scene. “That doesn’t mean… Those might not be police. And if they are, they can’t be here for us. No one knows where we are. Unless you told Cindy?”

  “Of course I didn’t.” He didn’t snap at her, but he’d spoken more abruptly than he’d intended. “Sorry. That came out shitty.”

  “It’s fine,” DeeAnn said, her tone making it clear that they had bigger things to worry about. “Should we make a run for it?”

  “Too late,” Jason said needlessly—the cars had stopped on either side of theirs. A third car arrived.

  And two SUVs.

  “Then we keep running,” DeeAnn said. “We don’t need to drive. We can go on foot, lose them in the woods.”

  “We can’t outrun them. And the money is stuffed under my seat.”

  “What do they want? Why are they just sitting there?”

  “They aren’t,” Jason said. “They’re watching us through binoculars and plotting their next move.”

  “Why would they do that?”

  Jason knew.

  They were looking for machine guns. For a reason to perforate the tower with bullets.

  They wanted him, and they would have him.

  Because he was going to exchange himself for DeeAnn’s safety.

  One of the car doors opened.

  This was it. The moment of truth. Would it be a crisis negotiator with a bullhorn? Or an ex-military unit, charging forward, weapons drawn?

  Jason was guessing the latter.

  A round head topped with spiky dark hair appeared. He looked like a million other men, except for that large hook nose and almost nonexistent chin.

  Jason had been wrong. There was a third option, and it was much worse.

  He didn’t want to tell DeeAnn, but she deserved to know. To prepare herself.

  “That’s Parauda,” Jason said.

  “The FBI agent?” DeeAnn’s voice trembled, but she leaned forward, squinting. “He’s not holding a gun.”

  Yet, Jason thought. But he would be. Parauda had come to get rid of him, one way or another.

  Jason’s heart squeezed. Parauda wouldn’t want to leave witnesses. Jason knew his own fate had been decided, and he’d accepted that possibility months ago.

  But he had to save DeeAnn.

  “Jason.” She tugged his arm, grabbed his hand, forced their fingers together. Her voice had grown steady, and when Jason looked at her, he found her amber eyes preternaturally calm. “They’re here to kill us. Both of us.”

  Chapter 58

  Jason squeezes my hand. His strength spreads out, and within seconds I feel like I’m covered in steel.

  Invincible.

  I tug him toward me, then turn so we’re facing the abandoned quarry.

  Without fear, I consider the world in front of us.

  The quarry seems to have quadrupled in size since I last looked. But I guess that’s natural, since previously I wasn’t planning to jump into it.

  These will be my final moments.

  And… I feel fulfilled.

  This is the most beautiful place on earth. Soft grass, stubborn shrubs and trees, comforting breezes. Two hawks drift through the sky.

  And most importantly: I’m with Jason.

  My senses are full of him, the scrape of his slightly rough hands, the complex coffee taste of our last kiss, the warmth of his body, the rugged, earthy scent of his skin, the pulsing of his heartbeat.

  “Earlier, I said I don’t have regrets,” Jason says. “I lied. I have one.”

  Even though I know it won’t
be something bad about me, I can’t breathe.

  “Is it about having wild anal sex next to an abandoned quarry?” I ask.

  “No.” He smiles. “You know, I started falling for you because of your sense of humor.”

  “Good,” I say. “Anal would be difficult right now. I don’t have any lube.”

  Raising our entwined fingers to his mouth, he kisses the back of my hand and says, “I love you so much. I would die a thousand times to save you from having to experience it even once.”

  I blink away tears.

  He pulls me close.

  “You deserved better than this,” he says hoarsely. “You deserved better than me.”

  “That’s not—”

  “It is. Here’s my regret, the thing I would have done differently. After the shootout, I followed you through the forest. I kept my distance. I wish I’d grabbed you. I wish I’d told you to keep the money, to take it and go far away to make another life for yourself. I should have put you in a cab myself. I wish I’d gone back, called the cops, invented a rival gang or… I don’t know. I wish I’d done everything differently that afternoon.”

  “But then we never would have found each other.”

  He looks at me as if I’m clueless. “We would have,” he said. “We were always going to find each other.”

  I’m speechless.

  “Are you ready?”

  I nod. “Yes.” Other than when I pledged my wedding vows, I’ve never felt so sure of myself.

  Together, we step forward.

  There’s nothing in front of us except air.

  “Count,” I say. I’m squeezing Jason’s hand so hard that his fingers are probably numb. Because despite everything, I don’t want to die. “Count to three.”

  No, I don’t want to die, but without Jason, I don’t want to live, either.

  “One,” he says, his voice deep and steady. “Two.”

  I inhale. An eternity crawls past. I’ve never felt so alive.

  Gunshots ring out.

  No… not gunshots. It’s just the sound of rain on the windshield as Jason and I race down the highway. It’s popcorn in the microwave on movie night. It’s…