The Perfect Solution

by Day Leclaire

  “Business. Hell.” He shook his head in disgust. “You’ve gone and cost me fifty bucks, Jane Dearly.”

  “Excuse me? I said I was here for—”

  “Forget it, Jane. You look as guilty as the day is long. That means it’s business. I told Billie you’d dropped in because those three nutty uncles finally let you off your leash. That maybe you wanted to be human for a change and have a little fun on your birthday. But Billie said no way. Said it didn’t matter what today was, you were here doing another of your crazy experiments.” He eyed her hopefully. “Any chance Billie’s wrong despite that nervous look you have going?”

  “Every chance in the world.” She took a quick sip of soda, studying Glenn over the rim of the sweat-moistened glass and thinking fast. She still wore her perfume and if he expressed any interest... “But if there was an experiment, would you want to participate?”

  Glenn held up his hands and backed away. “Thanks, but no thanks.”

  She hopped off her seat and took a step toward him, attempting to explain. “I just thought—”

  “That’s your problem. You think.” He jabbed his finger at her, than snatched it back as though fearing contamination. “Well, ’scuse me for buttin’ in when you’re conducting business. Next time you’re working on one of your warped experiments, try visiting someplace we’re not.”

  “But, Glenn... I’m testing a perfume. That’s all. And I’m not asking you to participate. I just offered in case you were interested.”

  “Hey, I said no, okay?”

  “Fine. I just wondered how you liked it.”

  “Put the drinks on our tab, Milt,” Glenn said. He glanced at his brother, Billie, and jerked his head toward the exit.

  Jane looked from the bartender to the Henderson boys, thoroughly perplexed. “I don’t understand what all the commotion’s about. It’s just a perfume. And I agreed not to experiment on any of you, if you didn’t want.”

  Billie shook his head. “You really don’t get it, do you? Can’t you just be a regular person for once? Even when you’re not working, you’re working. It puts people off. Especially men. Not that you seem to care.”

  The door slammed closed behind them and Jane swallowed hard, turning to face Milton. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean—”

  “Forget it, Jane. I know you can’t help it.” He swiped the counter with a cloth. “Mind if I make a suggestion?”

  Politeness combined with a twinge of guilt forced her to nod. “Not at all,” she lied. She’d never been particularly good at social fibs, but apparently she’d managed this one with some level of success, since Milton immediately offered his opinion.

  “You promised folks a number of years back that you wouldn’t use Salmon Bay as your own personal laboratory.”

  “I know, but—”

  “It makes them feel like lab rats, honey. So when people suspect that’s what you’re doing again, they get a bit tetchy.”

  She released her breath in a gusty sigh. “People don’t like it, huh?”

  “No, Jane. They don’t. You’re a nice lady. You’re smart, and I’ll bet if you didn’t run around trying so hard to look like a scientist, you’d be downright attractive.”

  Milton thought she was attractive? She stared in astonishment. She couldn’t remember the last time a man had said that to her. In fact, she had a strong suspicion no one ever had. Could it be... The perfume! She leaned across the bar toward him, waiting while he inhaled once or twice. “Milton?”

  “Yes, Jane?”

  “Do you think maybe it’s my perfume that makes you think I’m attractive? It’s a new formula.”

  The bartender sighed. “Honey, have you heard a word I’ve said?”

  “Oh, yes.” She beamed. “You said I was attractive.”

  “Jane?”

  “Yes, Milton?”

  “We all love you. We truly do. But I want you to try something, even if it’s just for today.”

  “What do you want me to do?”

  “Be a woman, Jane. Give it a shot for just twenty-four short hours. Be a woman first and a scientist last. Do you think you can do that?”

  Her mouth twisted. “You don’t understand, Milton.” She plucked her glasses from the top of her head and slipped them on before pulling her lab coat tighter around her. “I’ve never been very good at being a woman. Being a scientist is all I know.”

  “Then for your sake, I hope someone comes along who recognizes the woman.” He gazed at her in concern. “She’s there somewhere. She just needs to get out from behind that coat and those glasses. But she’s there and, whether you realize it or not, she’s special as hell.”

  CHAPTER TWO

  Lightning Creek, Wyoming

  “LET ME GET THIS STRAIGHT...” Flynn said, struggling to make sense of what he’d been told. “You just paid over five thousand dollars because you want a man for your niece? Because she needs one—what did you say—desperately?”

  “Yes,” Dogg rumbled.

  Flynn shoved back his chair and stood. “Gentlemen, it’s been interesting. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’ll be on my way.”

  “But we bought you,” Rube protested. “You can’t leave.”

  “Watch me.”

  “Sit down, Mr. Morgan.” Hickory fastened his pale blue eyes on him. They were odd sorcerer’s eyes that looked too old and saw too much. “Please.”

  Gut instinct urged Flynn to run. Now. He’d learned at an early age to listen to his instincts and it bothered him that he couldn’t react as promptly as he would have once upon a time. “I’ll write you a check to cover what you paid Lost Springs.”

  “Sit down, Mr. Morgan. At least do us the courtesy of hearing us out.”

  It was, unfortunately, a reasonable request. He swiveled the chair around and straddled it, resting his arms along the back. It made a statement, as he intended. “Talk fast,” he advised.

  Before they could, a waitress approached, a tall, voluptuous woman in her early twenties. She caught one glimpse of Flynn and flashed him a hungry look that promised she’d eat him alive while at the same time offering him the opportunity to return the favor if he were so inclined. “Well, hello, darlin’. What can I get for you?”

  He shot her an appreciative smile before his bruise helped tweak his memory. Not so long ago, he’d have indulged in a mild flirtation and enjoyed it immensely. Too bad those days were behind him. Turning over a new leaf could be a royal pain.

  “Coffee, please,” he requested.

  “Aw, come on, sugar. Sure there’s not anything else you want?” Lashes fluttered and her mouth glistened. “Anything at all?”

  “He’s already spoken for,” Rube interrupted. “We bought him and he’s ours.”

  The waitress’s eyes widened and her lush mouth formed a perfect O. “Yours?”

  Flynn closed his eyes and Rube struggled to explain. “We’re giving him to Jane, you see.”

  “Let it go,” Hickory advised. “Our waitress isn’t interested.”

  “But she—” Rube’s gaze skittered to Flynn. “He—”

  Dogg cleared his throat. “They aren’t interested. Not now.”

  The waitress leaned closer, offering a peek of her ample charms. “Look, boys... As amusing as this has been, I have other tables to take care of. Now, do you want something or not?”

  It was time to take charge, Flynn decided. Otherwise, he’d never get out of here. “Four coffees. Four house specials.”

  “You got it.” She scribbled something on her order pad, muttering, “And that’s all you get.”

  Now, why didn’t that surprise him? Flynn remained silent until the waitress had disappeared in the direction of the kitchen. “You were saying?” he prompted the brothers, a wave of exhaustion washing over him. Right now, all he wanted was to finish this nonsense and get back to San Francisco so he could make amends with Paulie. Was that so much to ask? He had a business to run and he couldn’t do it from Wyoming.

  Hickory contemplated th
e ball of exploding atoms decorating his cane. Then he lifted his gaze and fixed it on Flynn. “I believe I mentioned that we’re scientists.” He made the comment matter-of-factly. “We’ve worked as a team for over thirty years. If we strike you as somewhat eccentric, you’ll have to excuse us. We’ve spent so much time in our lab, we’ve never quite acclimatized ourselves to the real world.”

  “Don’t get out much,” Dogg interrupted.

  “When we run out of lemon sour balls,” Rube offered. “Or when Jane makes us. We get out then. Don’t like it, though. Don’t like it much at all.” He lowered his voice, adding significantly, “And people don’t like it when we do.”

  Flynn was willing to bet good money on that one. “Jane is the woman I’m supposed to—”

  “Help,” Rube explained, responding defensively to Flynn’s sardonic tone. “Today’s Jane’s birthday. She’s a clever girl. Very clever. And she works hard. She’s the sweetest, smartest, most generous girl in the world.”

  “Forgot awkward,” Dogg inserted.

  Hickory nodded. “And that, I’m afraid, is part of the problem. You see, Jane’s our niece. She’s as close to us as a daughter. And why wouldn’t she be? She came into our care when she was only five.”

  Flynn found the wizard’s phrasing interesting. “What happened to her parents?”

  “They were killed in an accident. They...left her to us.”

  “Were they insane?” Flynn asked politely.

  A humorless smile flickered across Hickory’s mouth. “Probably. Jane’s mother, Laura, was our little sister and the fourth member of our team. Besides adding immensely to our research, she did her best to socialize us—with only limited success. She also trusted us implicitly, which is how we became Jane’s guardians. We raised our niece and trained her. She’s a chemist, as well. In fact, she shows signs of becoming a quite brilliant scientist. Unfortunately, she doesn’t enjoy a social life, and we’ve realized, a bit late, that she’s followed our less-than-stellar example.”

  “She’s a hermit.” Flynn sighed. And a geek, no doubt.

  “Not a hermit. I suppose you’d call Jane...socially inept.”

  Definitely a geek. “And you expect me to do something about it as a birthday present?” Aw, hell. Why him? “In one weekend?”

  Dogg shook his shaggy head. “No.”

  “As for the weekend—” Hickory glanced at his companions. “We’d like to purchase your services for a full two weeks. In exchange, we’d be happy to renegotiate our contribution to Lost Springs Ranch.”

  “You’ve already paid five grand for me and you’re willing to renegotiate?” Flynn asked incredulously.

  “Yes.”

  “I sure picked the wrong line of work.” Flynn shook his head. “I didn’t realize chemists made out so well.”

  “Successful chemists ‘make out,’ as you phrase it, extremely well, Mr. Morgan. Patents can be very lucrative items to own. And my brothers and I own quite a number of popular patents. Considering that the ranch is in such dire financial straits—”

  “Yes, yes,” Rube said, jumping in. “And considering how much we need a man for Jane—”

  “We can afford to please ourselves, please Lost Springs Ranch, please Jane and even please you.”

  Please him? Forget it. Once upon a time he could have been bought. But not any longer. He’d cover the loss to Lost Springs out of his own pocket before he’d regress to the sort of man he’d once been. “I don’t care how much you pay the ranch, I’m not making love to your niece.”

  Three sets of eyes stared at him in shocked confusion.

  Flynn cleared his throat, suddenly realizing he’d taken a right turn while these three had gone left. “You don’t want me to seduce your niece?”

  “No!” Indignation made Rube look like an outraged pink teddy bear. “We most certainly did not ask you to...to...”

  Flynn gritted his teeth. “You said—”

  Hickory cut him off. “I do believe we’re talking at cross purposes.” He chuckled softly. “When we said we wanted your services, we didn’t mean romantic services.”

  “Then what do you want?” Flynn dreaded hearing the answer to that one.

  “For one thing...” Hickory exchanged quick glances with his fellow chemists. “We want you to protect Jane.”

  “Protect her from what?”

  “It’s a whom. From a man named Mick Barstow. He was Jane’s former partner and...and they had a personal involvement, as well.”

  “Now, there’s a surprise.”

  “Mr. Morgan, we had you investigated very carefully.”

  That gave Flynn pause. What would their investigation have turned up? More than he wanted them to know, he’d bet on that. “And?”

  “And we know about your background—” Hickory waited a beat before adding significantly “—all of it. We know about your past. We know how you’ve changed your life around as a result of that past. We know you have an extremely successful business with a Mr. Paul Richardson. And that you install security systems. And we know why you’re so good at your job.”

  “And?” Flynn repeated, his tone like ice.

  “We need your expertise. As we mentioned, we can also provide a substantial donation to Lost Springs Ranch over and above what we paid for you.”

  “I’m still sitting here.” Just.

  “We received the literature about your auction and instantly understood what we needed to do.”

  “Which was?”

  “We needed a man who’s capable of saving Jane from Mick Barstow. Now that they’re no longer partners, he’s determined to steal from her. Hurt her. She needs a protector.”

  “Then you bought the wrong man.”

  “We disagree.” Hickory’s pale eyes grew more intent. “We needed a man for Jane. A very special man. A man we deem safe, and who’s capable of looking out for her.”

  Flynn shook his head. “Trust me,” he informed them in a low voice, desperate to do the right thing. “I’m not the least bit safe, whatever that means. You don’t want a man like me anywhere near your niece.”

  Hickory leaned forward. “On the contrary. You’re precisely the sort we do want. Charming. Good with women. A bit of a con man. And temporary. Very temporary.”

  Ouch. “In and out, is that it?”

  The scientist didn’t rise to the bait. “We require your services for two weeks. We want you to install whatever security system my niece requires for our laboratory complex. We’ll pay separately for that, of course. And we have one other small job for you.”

  Hell. “What job is that?”

  “You’re a con man. We want you to con Mr. Barstow.”

  “I was a con man. I’m not any longer.”

  “It’s for a good cause, Mr. Morgan. This man is trying to steal my niece’s research work, work she’s invested years of her life developing. We have no way of stopping him.” Hickory fixed his pale eyes on Flynn. “But you do.”

  “Why hasn’t your niece hired someone to take care of this already?” The three scientists exchanged quick glances and he knew what that meant. “She doesn’t want help, does she?”

  “No,” Dogg said.

  “We’d have to do this on the sly,” Hickory explained. “Come with us to Salmon Bay. Knock on Jane’s door. Tell her we hired you to install a security system in the lab. Use some of that charm you possess in such abundance to gain her cooperation. You’re a reformed man, we know that. You won’t let anything or anyone harm her. Catch Mr. Barstow in the act of stealing Jane’s notes, turn him over to the cops and you can go on your merry way. You can accomplish that much with a modicum of success, can’t you?”

  “If I’m so inclined.” Flynn waited a beat. “Which I’m not.”

  “Then do it for the sake of the ranch, if not for yourself. Prove that you really are a changed man.”

  Flynn swore beneath his breath. This was some sort of sick joke, the universe’s way of taking his good intentions and throwing them back
in his face. He’d sworn off cons, regardless of how well-intentioned they were. But here sat these three, offering him a damsel in distress—his greatest weakness—and the chance to save her. The only problem was he’d have to lie to achieve his goal. As for being safe, who were they kidding? If they’d really had him investigated they’d know better.

  He began to laugh, the cynical sound edged with exhaustion. “You’re serious? You want me to save your niece?”

  “Yes,” Rube said with a big, happy smile. “If you wouldn’t mind.”

  Flynn shrugged. Why the hell not? Maybe this would present a way to get back into Paulie’s good graces. If he showed that he could resist seducing the woman he’d been hired to help, it would go a long way toward easing Paulie’s anger. Besides, he wouldn’t be lying to Jane. Not exactly. He’d install a security system, as promised. And if he caught Barstow in the process, she’d be grateful, right? As for his being safe around Hickory, Dickory and Dock’s precious niece... How had they described her? Awkward, a workaholic, socially inept. How tough would that be to resist? She’d be safe enough.

  “Okay, fine,” he agreed. “Double your donation to the ranch and I’ll do it.”

  “Excellent.” Hickory stood and tossed some money onto the table. “Shall we go?”

  Flynn lifted an eyebrow. “What? No lunch?”

  “No time,” Hickory said, shoving back his chair. “We have a private plane waiting to take us to Washington State. Salmon Bay, to be exact, an hour north of Seattle. We have plenty of food onboard, if you’re hungry.”

  “And lemon sour balls,” Rube added happily.

  Hickory’s amused blue eyes held a wealth of secrets, and Flynn realized in that moment that he’d just made a bargain with the devil. A bargain he suspected he’d spend a very long time regretting.

  * * *

  “THIS HAS NOT BEEN a good day,” Jane announced to Dipstick. “Maybe I should relabel this particular sample. I think Irritation Potion number one would be more appropriate, don’t you?”