by Elena Aitken
“Don’t look so angry,” she said. “I’m not kicking you out. I told you—I want to help.”
It took him a minute to let her words sink in. “You’re not kicking me out?”
“No.” She shook her head. “But you do know that you can’t stay here forever. I will have to rent it out soon.”
He nodded and then with the final bit of bravado draining from him, Bo sank to the couch. “I don’t know where to go,” he admitted. He watched as Carmen’s face split into a smile.
“But I do,” she said.
~ ~
By the time he walked Carmen to the door half an hour later, Bo's head was spinning as he tried to absorb everything she'd told him.
“Think about it,” she said, not for the first time. “The cabin's just sitting there.”
Bo reached around her for the door handle. “And management agreed to let me stay there?”
“Rent it,” Carmen clarified. “And of course provide the labor to fix it up.” Carmen moved to leave. “Look,” she said, “I know it's a lot to take in right now when you have so much going on. But it's a real option. At least for now.”
It was an option. Bo hadn't even considered the small caretaker cabin. No one ever gave it any thought. Built almost one hundred years ago, it was a two-bedroom log house that the family that used to maintain the grounds for the Lodge had lived in. Over the years, it had seen occasional upkeep, but mostly it had fallen into disrepair.
“Thank you, Carmen,” he said. “I mean it. You didn't have to do this.”
She shrugged and gave him a small smile. “No, I didn't. But I see how you are with her. And I think you're both so good for each other. What you both need is a family.”
“She's an amazing girl.” While he spoke, Bo stared out into the darkness beyond his door. “Ella has totally changed my life.”
“She has,” Carmen said, “but who said I was talking about Ella?”
Bo snapped his head around so he could look her in the eyes but Carmen didn't offer an explanation; she simply shrugged again and laughed. “Good night, Bo.”
Long after she'd left, Bo stood with the door open, letting the fresh mountain air soothe him. Morgan. She’d totally filled his thoughts. At least when he wasn't thinking about Ella and how to be a good dad. But there was so much more to think about. Hell, there was a lot more to think about and Bo couldn’t remember there ever being a time when he’d been more excited to experience more. A lot more. A life with Ella in it would be more. So much more. And so would a life with Morgan. No matter what Jeff said, what anyone said, Bo wouldn't screw it up because it was everything he never knew he wanted. And he wanted Morgan. If it wasn't too late.
He sighed, and took another look down the dimly lit pathway that led to the Lodge and farther, to the staff quarters where Morgan was. The pull to go to her was strong. Maybe if he could just explain everything, she’d understand and give him another chance? But that wasn’t an option, not with his little girl asleep inside.
Bo turned and closed the door behind him. He’d have to wait until morning before he could see her. Until then he was pretty sure he would spend a restless night thinking of all the things he was going to say to her, the things she’d say back and all the ways he’d like to make up when they were done talking.
Those thoughts finally helped Bo drift off to sleep. He dreamed of Morgan holding him close, the taste of her on his lips, and the sound of his name on her lips.
He lurched awake in bed and scanned the room.
Morgan.
Chapter Twenty-Four
Before she could think twice about what she was about to do, or even think it through again, Morgan jogged down the path towards Bo’s condo and straight up to the door. Astrid and Jeff had convinced her to go after what she wanted, and even with all his idiosyncrasies and his issues that he still had to deal with, Bo was undoubtedly what she wanted. She could sit back and let this great man and his beautiful daughter pass her by, or she could go and fight for what she wanted. And she intended to fight.
Morgan barely took a breath before she banged her fist on the front door. She couldn’t give herself time to chicken out or rethink what she was doing. When he didn’t answer, she raised her fist again and banged three times, hard. “Bo!”
Part of her told her to walk away, to make him come to her. But Morgan had had enough of playing it safe, of waiting for things to happen. It was time to make things happen.
“Bo!” She knocked her fist against the door again but before she could call for him a third time the door swung open.
Morgan had been so fired up about storming over to Bo’s condo and confronting him that she hadn’t given much thought to what she’d actually say when he answered the door. Especially if he answered the door wearing nothing but pajama bottoms, with his hair tousled from sleep and looking hotter than hell.
“Morgan.” He half whispered, half spoke her name as if he wasn’t sure it was her standing on his doorstep in the middle of the night or an apparition. “What are you…why are you…”
His confusion was enough for Morgan to regain her senses and put thoughts of running her hands down Bo’s naked chest out of her mind. She shook her head and remembered why she’d come. “I need answers, Bo.” She pushed past him with a gentle shove and walked into the living room. She didn’t have to look to know that he’d follow.
“Morgan, I—“
“No.” She held up her hand to ward off his protests. She hoped he didn’t notice the way it shook, just a little, from her nerves. “I have something to say, and I need to say it.” She took a deep breath. “I wasn’t even going to come here tonight. I know you have a lot going on with Ella and probably the last thing on your mind right now is having a relationship with me. Hell, from what I understand, having a relationship is never the first thing on your mind.”
“Morgan, that’s—“
“Let me finish.” She shook her head and wouldn’t look in his eyes. “I know the rumors, Bo. Everyone knows that you’re a player. Didn’t you tell me yourself that you don’t ‘do relationships’?. I get it. I do.” She turned away and paced the length of the room. “And you know what? I didn’t want a relationship, either,” she said into the picture window. “I came here to get away from all that. But then you were…well, you were…”
“What?” Bo had moved across the room so he stood right behind her. He was so close that she could feel his breath on her neck. Her entire body tightened in response to his proximity. “I was all what, Morgan?”
She held her breath but didn’t dare turn around.
“Say it,” he challenged her.
“You were perfect,” she said. And then she did turn around. “You were so damned perfect.”
Bo frowned and looked away. “I’m far from perfect, Morgan. I’ve done nothing but screw everything up my whole life. Look at Ella. Look at what happened there. You can’t call that perfect.”
“You’re perfect for me,” she said. “Everything that makes you who you are makes you perfect for who I am. I didn’t want to fall in love with you.” Morgan laughed. “I didn’t even want to like you. That first day I met you, I didn’t think I’d ever met someone so pompous and full of themselves as you. But then seeing you with Ella…the way you tried so hard…the way you changed everything for her. Your total willingness to change everything for one little girl, I—“
“Wait.” Bo looked up and straight into her eyes, holding her gaze. “What did you say?”
“Ella—“
“Not Ella,” he said. “What you said about me. Loving me.”
Morgan swallowed hard. She hadn’t meant to lay her feelings out so openly. She’d been caught up in the moment and until the second the words came out of her mouth, she didn’t even realize herself that she felt that way. But she did. And because she’d already said it, she might as well own it.
She looked him square in the eyes and with only a slight waver in her voice said, “I just told you I’ve fal
len in love with you. I didn’t mean to, and Lord knows I can think of a thousand reasons why I shouldn’t have, but I did and—“
Morgan’s words were lost when Bo leaned forward and sealed his mouth to hers. Before she could think to push him away so she could finish what she needed to say, Morgan lost herself in the kiss. It no longer mattered that she had a list of things she wanted to say to him, explanations she wanted him to give her. Nothing mattered, except the taste of his lips on hers, the heat from his chest as he pressed it closer to her, and the way her body responded to him.
Bo pulled away, breaking their heat. Morgan let out a moan of displeasure and stepped back.
“Morgan,” he started, “before this goes any further, I need to tell you something.”
“I know you didn’t sleep with Taryn.”
His face twisted into a mask of confusion. “Taryn? Of course I didn’t sleep with her. Did you…oh, you did.”
She waved her hand, dismissing it. “Only for a minute. Astrid and Jeff sorted it out. But I still don’t understand why you turned to her and why you did what you did.”
“With Ella?” Bo reached for her hand and led her to the couch. “That’s what I need to talk to you about. You deserve an explanation. And something tells me that as much as you like kissing me, that’s the real reason you came here tonight.” He smiled and it was so sexy and playful all at once that Morgan didn’t have a chance to feel embarrassed.
“You’re right,” she said. “And I don’t think I’m the only one who was enjoying the kissing.” She shot him a look and crossed her arms across her chest. “So, talk.”
“I see you’re not going to make this easy on me.”
“Should I?”
Bo shook his head slightly and looked down at his hands. “I got scared,” he said after a moment. “I know I keep saying that but it’s the truth. And really, there’s not a whole lot more I can say. This is all so new to me, Morgan, and just like you, I didn’t plan to fall in love with you. But I did.”
Morgan took in a sharp breath of air and held it. She couldn’t be sure that she’d heard him right. Had he really just told her he loved her? When he looked up, and she saw the emotion shining in his eyes, the truth was in front of her. She had heard him right, and he had meant it. She exhaled the breath she’d been holding.
“But it’s not so simple anymore,” Bo continued. “It’s not just me that I need to think of and when I started to have those feelings, I panicked. What if you didn’t feel the same? What if you did and it worked for a while and then I screwed it up? What about Ella? She doesn’t deserve to go through that.”
“So you sent her away? How is that better? How is that what’s best for her? You’re her father.” Morgan jumped up from the couch and paced to the window again. She stared out into the darkness, searching for something. “Do you have any idea what I would give to have a child?” She whispered the question more to her reflection in the glass than to Bo. She watched his reflection as he came to stand behind her, close but not touching. “All I’ve ever wanted was to be a mom.” Morgan spoke but didn’t turn around. “I wanted to hold a child in my arms, to be her everything and know that she was mine. When I came here, I thought I could never have that, that I’d never know that love.” Morgan turned. Tears streamed down her face as she continued, “And then I met Ella. I think I fell in love with her just as much as I fell in love with you. And then you…you—“
“I screwed up,” Bo whispered. With a gentle touch, he used his thumb to wipe a tear off her cheek. “I can’t tell you how sorry I am, Morgan. And I’m going to spend the rest of my life making it up to Ella. I got scared and I know that’s not an excuse. But it’s the only explanation I have.”
Her chest ached with emotion for this man and his child. Morgan tipped her head and looked into Bo’s eyes. “You did screw up,” she said with a small smile.
“Morgan, I’m so sorry, I really am. How can I make it up to you?”
A spark lit deep in her core at his suggestion. She could think of more than a few ways he could make amends and she was about to tell him so, when a small voice interrupted them.
“Dad?”
Both Bo and Morgan turned towards Ella, who was standing in the hallway, her hair mussed from sleep, her clay deer clutched in her hand.
“Did she just…”
Morgan’s face split into a smile as she looked to Bo’s shocked expression. “I think she did,” she said.
“Dad,” Ella said again; this time her voice was a little stronger, a bit clearer.
“Did we wake you?” Bo walked towards her and crouched so he could look into her eyes. “I’m sorry if we were too loud. I was just telling Morgan how happy I was that you’re back home with me.” Bo smiled and turned so he was facing Morgan, too. “Of course,” he said, “I’m happy you’re both here with me. And I was just going to tell Morgan a secret, but now that you’re awake, I think maybe you should hear it, too.” Bo turned back to Ella. “Do you want to hear my secret?”
Ella nodded frantically and Bo laughed before taking her hand and settling on the couch with her in his lap. Morgan joined them, sitting slightly apart before Bo bridged the gap between them with his hand and pulled her closer.
“So what’s the secret?” Morgan asked.
“Well, we can’t stay in the condo forever,” Bo said. “Carmen’s going to kick us out soon.”
Morgan opened her mouth to protest, to tell him that he could move into staff quarters and share an apartment with her, but he held up his hand and the grin on his face stopped her from speaking.
“But I don’t want to move to the city,” Bo continued. “Besides, there aren’t any horses in the city.” Ella’s eyes grew wide at the mention of horses. “So, we’re going to move into our very own little cabin,” Bo said triumphantly. “You’ll even get your own room, Ella. Maybe we can paint it pink.” Ella frowned. “Or maybe just decorate it with horses,” he added quickly. “It’s pretty run down right now, so we’ll have to put some work into it. But it’s nothing I can’t handle—besides, the end result will be worth it.”
“That sounds great, Bo. I’m so happy for you,” Morgan said.
“Happy for us.” Bo held her other hand and looked at her so intensely Morgan was afraid she might blush. “I want you to move in with us,” he added. “I don’t want to screw it up again, Morgan. And I won’t. I promise.”
The feeling drained from her hands and for a moment, Morgan felt as if she was floating. Only Bo’s hands held her to the couch and to reality. Moving in together was a huge step; she wasn’t sure she was ready. It was a lot to ask and even more for her to take in all at once.
Before she could give her answer, Morgan felt a tap on her shoulder. When she looked over, Ella was standing next to the couch holding the picture she’d been working on in the Cub’s Club a week ago. It was the project where Morgan had the kids collect things from nature to create a scene. At the time, she hadn’t given much thought to Ella’s picture. She’d worked like the rest of the kids, gluing and creating. Now, with it in front of her, tears sprang to her eyes.
“Me,” Ella said, pointing to the little twig girl on the paper. “Dad.” She pointed to the taller figure standing next to it.
Morgan glanced over and saw the smile on Bo’s face at the sound of Ella calling him Dad. Morgan was pretty sure he’d never get sick of hearing the sound of it.
“And you,” Ella said, pulling Morgan’s attention back to the picture. Ella’s finger was pointing at the other figure standing on the other side of the little girl. She had moss for hair, but other than that, it didn’t look any different from the others. When Morgan looked up, Ella was smiling one of the biggest smiles she’d seen.
“I didn’t know you still had this,” Morgan said as she took the picture from Ella.
“It was gonna be a gift,” she said. “I hid it.” Ella glanced toward her father.
“It’s beautiful, Ella,” Bo said.
“Hid
den gifts,” Morgan mused, thinking back to what Astrid had said when she’d first arrived.
“They’re the best kind,” Bo said.
Morgan looked first to Ella and then to Bo. “Yes,” she said. “They really are.” Morgan took Ella’s hand and pulled her close so she could scoop her up onto her lap.
“So?” Bo asked. “What do you say? Are you ready for this?”
Balancing Ella on one knee, Morgan leaned forward and put a soft kiss on Bo’s lips before pulling back. “Where do I sign up?”
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