by T L Gray
Standing slowly, in vast contrast to my racing heart, I pushed down the fire igniting in my gut. Gracie Belle?
Grace was back in director mode, looking poised and regal as she approached the man. “Sam, this is Matt Holloway. Matt, Sam Hartsford.” She emphasized his last name as if I wouldn’t catch the importance. That grated. I wasn’t an idiot.
For some reason, I’d always pictured the center’s benefactor as an old man with white hair and a cane. The man in front of me was anything but old. In fact, he and Grace matched in both style and presence, making me feel as if I was the intruder, not him.
He stepped forward, casually draping his arm around her shoulders, a gesture that seemed far more intimate than was appropriate between a boss and employee. The look he sent me wasn’t casual, nor was it friendly. “Matt. Very nice to meet you.”
Grace must have sensed the tension, and went overboard explaining how I’d worked with the center for years and how far Marcus had come since meeting me. Call it hurt pride, but each word she spoke felt like she was trying to justify why she’d even be talking to a guy like me. She didn’t need to explain herself to him, nor did I appreciate how much she seemed to value his opinion.
Unable to stomach any more of her flustered explanations, I moved toward the door, stopping just long enough to shake his hand. “Sam, it’s nice to finally meet you. Liz always speaks highly of you.” Turning toward Grace, who remained at his side, I nodded toward the door. “Come walk me out.” It was a statement, not a question.
She hesitated, eyes wide, and appeared to be battling with herself. That was all I needed to see, and I turned to leave without a look back. I didn’t need that crap in my life.
I was already out the front doors when Grace caught up with me. “Matt, wait. I’m sorry.”
Turning, I waited until she was only inches away before speaking, my voice harsh. “Do you want to be with me, Duchess? Yes or no?”
She let out an exasperated sigh. “Yes. You know I do.”
“Then don’t ever make me feel like that again. I’m not your dirty little secret.” I was too angry to trust our closeness, and started back toward my Harley. Driving off before Grace could reply, I wondered once again what I had gotten myself into.
Chapter 20
* * *
GRACE
I watched until Matt disappeared, berating myself for the way I’d just handled things. Of course he’d be upset. He finally let his guard down and I acted as if we were mere acquaintances. I wasn’t prepared for my two worlds to collide, and obviously my ability to think on the fly was dismal.
Sam was still waiting when I stepped back into my office. I grabbed a clipboard and smiled. “Show me your idea for that room.”
He merely lifted an eyebrow. “What is he to you?”
Leave it to Sam to get straight to the point. His innate ability to read people had no doubt contributed to his success. “I don’t know yet. It’s still very new.”
He moved closer, making me uncomfortable under his stare. “What about Stewart?”
“What about him? We’re not together anymore.” My voice raised an octave, making it sound like I cared more than I did.
“Hey, I’m not saying you should be. But Gracie, you’ve been in love with him for as long as I’ve known you. This Matt character can only be a distraction and not the good kind. You need to let yourself heal.”
I was getting angry. “Sam, I am perfectly capable of knowing what my needs are. Now, would you like to discuss the back room or are we done for today?”
Sam’s bellowing laugh filled the room. “Yikes, Gracie, you almost sounded like your mother just then. I didn’t know you had that kind of fire in you, but I like it.”
Crossing my arms, I could feel the anger dissipating already, and couldn’t help but return his grin. He gripped my shoulders and then turned me around, affectionately pushing me toward the door.
Suddenly we stopped, and Sam leaned in. “You know I’m going to check him out.”
Easing out of his grip, I turned, feeling uneasy. “We already have a background check on him. He has a past, but it’s just that. His past. He’s a great guy and I like him. A lot.”
“Gracie, your wholehearted love for others is what makes you so special. But it’s also what makes you vulnerable to people who want to hurt you.”
“People like Stewart and Lacey?” My clipped voice challenged him.
“Yes, to name a few. But they aren’t bad people, Gracie.”
“Neither is Matt.”
His mouth was set in a thin line. “We shall see.”
I suddenly understood why people were intimidated by Sam. The way he spoke those last three words made it clear he was ending our conversation, but he also made it clear the subject wasn’t going to be dropped. He’d look into Matt’s past and see a record. He wouldn’t see the kind, compassionate man I knew. The man who made me feel treasured and safe. My stomach knotted as I realized things were going to get a lot more complicated.
I was relieved and exhausted by the time Sam left, saying he had some business to take care of. He had promised to be an extra pair of hands, but as I looked down at my now doubly long to-do list, I realized he was just finding more and more for us to tackle. He was excited about the renovation plans, and even more excited that there was a good chance we’d have the resources to do it. He admitted to having all but given up on the center’s viability. When I asked him why he hired me when he was practically sure the center would close, he just changed the subject, commenting again on how much older I seemed since leaving New York.
The whistle blew. Intramurals would be starting soon. I had seen Matt come in earlier, but didn’t go talk to him. He was involved with the center for Marcus, and I had no intention of our new relationship, or whatever it was, getting in the way of those two bonding.
As if he could sense I was thinking about him, I heard a rap on my doorframe. “Have you eaten yet?”
I looked up from my desk and studied Matt’s face to see if he was still upset, but he remained completely unreadable. Typical.
“No. Are you asking me to dinner?”
He grinned, warming my insides. “Come on.”
Looking at my watch, I saw it was only six. “The center doesn’t close for another two hours.”
“Grace, you’ve been here since dawn. Darius and Jeff can handle cleanup. Come on, we need to talk.”
His words made me nervous, as if he was setting me up to say good-bye. I wasn’t ready to end this thing between us, no matter what challenges were lurking in the shadows. Matt made me feel things I never had before.
Standing slowly, I grabbed my bag. “Okay.”
He was right as usual, and Darius had no issue with doing cleanup. To my surprise and delight, the center was bustling as if yesterday’s turmoil had never happened. I guessed one incident wasn’t enough to keep the kids away, but I knew in my heart there couldn’t be a second one.
We drove by my apartment so I could drop off my car and change into casual clothes. Matt wouldn’t tell me where he was taking me, but I knew without asking that it wouldn’t be anyplace fancy.
We drove out of the city again, but to a different area from last night. This place was surrounded by trees, and we had to walk awhile before I saw a clearing come into view. A large blanket with a picnic basket was waiting for me along with a single rose.
“When did you do all this?”
“Before I came to see Marcus.” Matt was watching my reaction and then laced his fingers with mine. “This is my way of apologizing for this morning.”
Walking toward the romantic setup, I smiled. “You’re good at it.”
We sat cross-legged and faced each other. Matt took my hand again, rolling my palm around in his. He seemed nervous.
“Let’s talk about boundaries. You go first.” He waited, giving me full rein to place any demands I had on our relationship.
Swallowing hard, I realized I’d never had this kind of
conversation before. Stewart and I never talked about boundaries. He’d just push until I said no. It was always on me to stop things.
“I firmly believe that sex is for marriage. I know that’s old-fashioned in today’s world, and I’m not saying I think we’re going to get married or anything. But it does mean that I don’t want to take things so far that it’s hard for either one of us to stop. I know I won’t change my mind on this issue, so if that is a deal breaker for you, I understand.” It had been a deal breaker for Stewart and I wasn’t going down that road again.
Matt grinned, his hazel eyes sparkling. “It’s not a deal breaker.” He waited in silence for me to continue.
“Okay, um, I think in light of this morning, we should forgo any affection at the center. It’s my workplace.”
“Completely agree.” A mischievous grin spread across his lips. “But that means I get to kiss you everywhere else.”
“That’s only fair,” I conceded with a smile. His walls were completely gone and I adored this new, affectionate Matt.
His hand, roughened with calluses, wrapped around my neck and pulled me gently forward until we were touching. The kiss was sweet and endearing, without the desperation we had experienced earlier but just as remarkable.
“I’m sorry, go on.” He sat back, waiting.
I took in his face. He intimidated people. They’d move out of the way when we approached, or watched him from the corners of their eyes, but I had seen his gentleness. I found his short dark hair sexy. In fact, I found every inch of him to be sexy, even the tattoos that subtly told his deepest feelings. “I think that’s it. What about you?”
“I only have one.”
I waited, nervous for some reason.
“It’s you, me, and no one else.”
Now I was pulling him to me until we were falling as we kissed. Somehow I knew the struggles I had with Stewart wouldn’t exist with him. Matt wasn’t a pretender, nor did he make promises he wouldn’t keep. I didn’t wonder if he would respect my limits or if he would be faithful. I trusted him completely.
He adjusted his weight so he was beside me and not on top. I could already sense he was being more careful when we touched. With his elbow bent and his head propped up against one hand, he ran a finger along the bottom of my shirt in a slow, seductive manner. The gesture seemed innocent enough, but it was driving me crazy.
“Why does Sam call you Gracie Belle?”
The mention of Sam’s name quickly doused my fire. I sat up and Matt followed.
“I really didn’t want people to know this because it makes me look unqualified, like I only got the job because of my connections.”
He was watching me, hanging on my every word. “Go on.”
“Sam and my father are very close. Truthfully, he’s close to all of us. He’s like an adopted member of the family. I’ve been called Gracie Belle since I was a little girl, and since Sam spends so much time with us, he just kind of picked it up.”
Matt took my hand in his again, running his finger along each one of mine. He stopped at the ring on my right index finger, examining the way the ruby caught the light. “Grace, anyone could tell from the way you two interacted this morning that there is history there. There’s chemistry. I overreacted the way I did this morning partly because I assumed it was romantic.”
“With Sam?” I shuddered. “He’s like a brother to me.”
Matt grinned, clearly happy with the answer. “So how did you get the name Gracie Belle?”
I covered my face. “Ugh. It’s so stupid.”
“Tell me,” he prodded, laughing. “I want to know everything about you.”
Peeking through my fingers before lowering my hands, I caved. “All right, fine. When I was a little girl, I loved the movie Beauty and the Beast. Belle had dark hair like me, and she was strong and determined. I wanted to be just like her, so I told my parents that my new name was Belle and I wasn’t going by Gracie anymore. I even stopped answering when they used my real name. I don’t know, somehow Gracie Belle took hold and I’ve been called that ever since.”
I pushed him when he started laughing, feeling even more embarrassed. “Stop.”
“So do I get to call you Gracie Belle?”
“No, absolutely not! Only family calls me that, and obviously a few friends who have known me forever. Gracie makes me feel like I’m still a child.”
He lay back, pulling me on top of him, his hard body in vivid contrast to my soft one.
“Besides . . .” I paused, feeling lightheaded from the way his mouth felt moving up my neck. “I love the way you say my name.”
Suddenly I was on my back, my eyes locked with Matt’s adoring ones. “Then I’ll be sure to say it all the time . . . Grace.” He barely got my name out before he lowered his head to mine again, sweeping me up in a kiss so passionate I could hardly breathe.
Chapter 21
* * *
MATT
I have a girlfriend, I thought, smiling. More amazing was that being with Grace no longer scared me. The feelings I had for her were different than with Maggie. More real, more mature. Sure, I still wanted to protect her and could spend every waking minute with her, but she didn’t make me crazy the way Maggie did. In fact, she did just the opposite. Grace calmed me, centered me.
Cody was already waiting when I strolled into the gym, whistling.
“Hey, buddy, how’s your week going?” He watched me suspiciously as I put on my headgear and mouthpiece, still smiling.
“Fine, I guess.” He was understandably distant. Our last session hadn’t gone well, and I had lost my temper with him. I’d have some rebuilding to do today, that was for sure.
We got in the ring and Cody’s stance was defensive, like his tone had been. I took him through moves he had mastered, giving him the opportunity to pin me several times and praising him along the way. As he became more confident, I switched to some of the harder moves, the ones he’d struggled with last week. Once again he had the technique perfect, but lacked the strength to finish the job.
Throwing his headgear down, Cody turned and grabbed the ropes. “I’ll never make the varsity team. I’m just a fat kid who’s fooling himself. Why did I ever think I could do this?”
“Cody, over here. Now.”
He turned, tears threatening to fill his eyes.
“Down here.” I got in the push-up position, waiting for him to join me. Finally he did, and we held ourselves there, face-to-face. “Now a little lower,” I said, showing him what to do. He followed, and I could see his arms shaking a little. “Lower.” I continued until I knew he was ready to collapse. I then pushed back up to the ready position, nodding for him to do the same.
Standing, I offered him my hand. He took it begrudgingly and stood.
“I want you to do fifty of those every day, counting five seconds between each position. Break it up all you want, but at the end of the day, you make sure you have fifty.”
I walked closer, squeezing his bicep, which was firmer every week. “Cody, you’re almost there. Don’t give up now because you have to work a little harder. Every day you get stronger, and soon that move will be as easy as the others. That vulnerable kid you once were is gone. In fact, I’ve never been more proud of a trainee than I am of you.”
His head shot up in surprise because I rarely dished out compliments like that, but I meant every word. He had heart and determination, an unstoppable combination.
“You don’t think they’ll mess with me when school starts again?”
“At this point, Cody, if they do, I’ll enjoy hearing all about how you took them down. Come on, let’s do two miles and then try again. We still need to get your stamina up.”
Cody followed me to the treadmills and finally smiled as we started jogging. “It’s good to have you back.” His words meant more than he could know, and I realized how much I had let the chaos in my head affect every part of my life.
“It’s good to be back.”
My time wi
th Cody went a little long, keeping me from stopping by to see Grace before I headed to Bruce’s office. I settled for texting.
Me: Morning. Running late, so I won’t get to stop by.
Grace: Probably better. Sam has us running around like crazy people.
I stared at her text, feeling a little sting. Where were the I miss you and Think of me comments? The girlie stuff that all us guys say we hate but secretly expect from the girls we care about?
Shrugging off the disappointment, I tied my bag down on my bike and headed to the office. Bruce had a full load scheduled, starting an hour earlier than usual. He was becoming more and more in demand. With all the court-appointed cases and word-of-mouth referrals, I could hardly find available booking times. I mentioned hiring another counselor, but Bruce was territorial and dismissed the idea completely. Maybe he’d change his mind when we had to start refusing new patients.
He was already there when I came in, but his door was shut. I knew from experience he was likely reading and praying before his first patient, a practice he said was essential. Just one of the many reasons I respected the man.
I stared at my unopened Bible, the one I kept at work. I’d been so angry with God the past couple of weeks, I hadn’t even looked at the thing. Filled with conviction, I began reading where I had left off.
Lost completely in the story of Joseph, I almost didn’t hear Bruce’s door opening. “My eight o’clock just canceled.”
I glanced quickly at the computer screen. “What? When?” Looking closer, I noticed that I didn’t recognize the name. In fact, I hadn’t made the appointment at all.
“Looks like I’ve got an hour, so come on. It’s been a while since we had a chance to talk.”
I shook my head, realizing I’d been duped. “You’re getting sneaky, old man.” Bruce had been on me to schedule myself an appointment. My last excuse was that he didn’t have any open slots. I guess he took care of that problem.
Settled into his favorite chair and watching my mannerisms the entire time, Bruce looked thoughtful as I sat opposite him.