The Missed Kiss

by Nicola Lowe

  The Missed Kiss

  Nicola Lowe

  N.Lowe Publishing

  Copyright © 2021 by N.Lowe Publishing

  This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents are either the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events or locales is entirely coincidental.

  I know… it makes me sad too. If I could conjure up Zack and Luke for real, I would. Trust me!

  All rights reserved.

  No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means, including information storage and retrieval systems, without written permission from the author, except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.

  First paperback edition July 2021

  Cover design by Jacqueline Abromeit

  ISBN - 9781916907911 (ebook)

  ISBN - 9781916907904 (paperback)

  Published by N.Lowe Publishing

  www.nloweauthor.com

  Thank you to my gorgeous family for coping with me being glued to the laptop.

  Thank you to Ann & Sarah for all the reading and constant messaging.

  Huge thank you to Mandi Allen - The Coffeehouse Writer for non stop support, advice and appreciation.

  xx

  Contents

  1. One

  2. Two

  3. Three

  4. Four

  5. Five

  6. Six

  7. Seven

  8. Eight

  9. Nine

  10. Ten

  11. Eleven

  12. Twelve

  13. Thirteen

  14. Fourteen

  15. Fifteen

  16. Sixteen

  17. Seventeen

  18. Eighteen

  19. Nineteen

  20. Twenty

  21. Twenty One

  22. Twenty Two

  23. Twenty Three

  Afterword

  About the Author

  24. Book Two Sneak Peek

  One

  “I changed my mind, I don’t want to go.” I complained to Cassie as we sat on the Saturday lunchtime train to Manchester, with its musty smell and sticky floor. I didn’t even want to think about the state of these seats and what might lurk in them. Cassie rolled her eyes at me dramatically.

  “You’re not getting out of this Lily,” she smiled at me. “I’m not going to let you waste away in that flat of yours any longer.”

  “I can’t believe I let you talk me into this.” The train rattled into a dark tunnel. Cassie had persuaded me to let her find me a date. I had agreed to meet one person for one coffee, and even that didn’t seem a great idea right now. In her opinion four years of being single was way too much, but it suited me fine. Aged twenty-seven, my life was exactly what I wanted, working as a legal secretary at Draper & Hughes, with the best commute in the world as I rented the flat above the office. My social circle was small but perfect - me and my two best friends. Cassie and I had been inseparable since the first day of high school. Unlike me though she’d settled down in her early twenties and now lived in an insanely beautiful home with her husband and two daughters. My other best friend was Luke - we’d met at work four years ago, we’d been through some pretty major events and were as close as close could be. He was my honorary big brother, he always kept a protective eye out for me.

  My face was still screwed up in a sulk. “So, remind me, who am I meeting? Who am I being thrown into the lions’ den with?” My stomach was in knots, I knew she meant well but I don’t think she completely understood the anxiety this was stirring up in me.

  Cassie’s face lit up; she loved this. She thrust her phone out, showing me the photograph once again. “Zack, who is also twenty-seven and lives in Cheshire. He’s a lawyer.”

  “Why is that a good thing?” I asked. “It’s not like on Suits you know. I keep telling you this.”

  She didn’t reply. To be fair to her, he looked lovely. The picture looked like it was taken at a work function. He was wearing a well-cut suit, it looked designer. His brown eyes had a sparkle to them. He was holding a champagne glass which always worked well for me! I really did like his hair - sort of short at the sides and then a longer length and well styled on top - It suited him. It was a gorgeous shade of dark brown, almost matching a dark, chocolatey mocha that I would treat myself to at weekends. I looked up at Cassie and saw she was grinning at me.

  “See, you like him! I told you I’d choose someone nice.”

  I frowned at her. “How tall is he?”

  “Five eleven,” she replied with a look like she knew I was about to complain.

  “I bet he lied, I bet he’s only five nine really, so I’ll never be able to wear heels with him.” I rolled my eyes. Five nine was my height, and it had caused me paranoia for a long time, as my ex-boyfriend had hated me looking taller than him, but I adored heels.

  “Lily, why would he lie when he’s about to meet you? You’d obviously notice.”

  I shrugged, knowing I was acting sulky. “Seems short to me.”

  “It’s virtually six foot, stop looking for issues,” she scolded.

  When the train stopped at the station, we headed straight to the toilets for a last-minute outfit check. I must’ve tried on twelve outfits, four hairstyles and ten pairs of shoes before we settled on this look - a flattering dark blue, knee-length skater dress. We were meeting for coffee, just casual, so I’d teamed it with a short, distressed-look denim jacket. The outfit was then finished off with black ankle boots in soft leather.

  The height difference between me and Cassie was obvious in the mirror, the top of her head just reached my nose. She was so different to me with her blue eyes and blonde bobbed hair, always straightened immaculately. Whereas I tended to look too serious at times, Cassie always looked like she was about to burst into laughter. She had the friendliest face I could imagine.

  “We can walk to the coffee shop now. It’s five minutes from here. I’ll wait outside until I see you’re settled,” she said, like a mother hen. “Then I’m going shopping! Text me when you’re ready and I’ll come straight back and meet you.”

  “OK, Mum.” I teased.

  “Your make-up looks great,” she commented, as she squinted at my favourite black winged eyeliner which emphasised my dark brown eyes. “Natural but gorgeous. You and that perfect skin. Sickening!”

  The walk was quick, maybe too quick for my nerves. The early spring sunshine felt so nice on my face, I’d missed it over the long winter. As we approached, I could see a man I thought might be Zack stood outside. I begrudgingly admitted that he looked taller than on the photograph as he leaned against the wall and scrolled through his phone. He wore well-fitted dark blue jeans and a black round-neck jumper that looked, from here, as though it might be cashmere. His hair looked perfect - that same mocha colour from the photograph. Good hair was a weakness of mine.

  Zack definitely had the tall, dark and handsome look going on, with a smattering of dark stubble that looked as though he was relaxed about his appearance, but I expected was styled. I snapped out of ogling him as Cassie gave my hand a squeeze and crossed over the road so she could keep an eye on me for a few minutes.

  As I headed towards him, focused on not tripping over or otherwise making an idiot of myself, my throat was dry with nerves. I prayed this was in fact him and I wasn’t about to approach a complete stranger, waiting for his wife or friend. My chestnut brown hair was in a loose plait, I flicked it forwards over my shoulder as I approached, the ends tickling my collarbone. It was one of those plaits that looked effortless but had taken ages to get right. The man looked up with confident eyes. “Zack?”

  I noticed how warm and genuine his smile was
as he nodded. “Lily?”

  At least I’d got the right person and not approached a random stranger. Now I just needed to relax, my shoulders were so tense. I focused on dropping them down, taking breaths like I’d practised so many times.

  “Glad you made it. I figured this would be easier to find than a little independent place,” he explained.

  “I can find a Starbucks from miles away.” I smiled, hoping we could break the ice.

  “You’re beautiful, I didn’t expect you to look like your photograph for some reason,” he gazed at me for a second that felt like it stretched to minutes before I saw a subtle patch of pink appear on his cheeks. “Sorry, let’s get coffee.”

  I continued to smile, unsure how to respond as I followed, taking a seat at a table near the window while Zack joined the queue. How does he not look nervous? I tapped my foot against the table leg ten to the dozen, instant giveaway of my anxiety. Breathe Lily. Legs tucked under me to stop the tapping, I repeated to myself in my head, it’s just a coffee, it’s just a coffee.

  This was the same chain of coffee shop that I frequented at home, but this branch was huge in comparison. The male baristas seemed to all share a hipster look: shaggy beards and plug piercings. There was a corner set up for an open mic night later that evening, which was advertised on large posters. There was also a section selling coffee related products and re-usable cups in all the colours imaginable. It seemed as though people from every walk of life were gathered here: teenage girls giggled in noisy groups, parents tried to control toddlers and middle-aged couples gazed wistfully out of the window. I wondered if anyone felt as anxious as me.

  “Here you go,” Zack placed the delicious-smelling mug in front of me as he sat down opposite with his own. “Hazelnut latte.”

  “Thank you. I’m a complete coffee addict. This smells so nice. What did you get?” I asked, gesturing to his own mug, wondering what I could read into his coffee choice.

  “Mocha,” he replied. “I’m a coffee addict too but have such a sweet tooth. Mocha is a good balance.”

  I smiled, wondering if it was a coincidence that I’d compared his hair to that colour. I noticed more and more about him as we talked.

  “I keep thinking about how much I spend in these places and what else I could do with the time, but then coffee made at home isn’t quite the same.”

  “Exactly,” I agreed, taking a long sip, conscious of not spilling it, and avoiding a milky foam moustache.

  “So, you work in law too Lily?”

  “Yeah, I do, but Cassie may have made it sound more glamorous than it is. It’s a small family law firm. I’m one of the secretaries. I love working there.”

  “It’s good to love where you work,” he smiled. “Sounds completely different to where I am. It’s a big office in the city centre, not too far from here. I’m in corporate law.”

  “How about when you’re not working? What do you like to do?” It felt as though I was settling into the rhythm of this now.

  “Obviously come out for coffee,” he replied. “Love a sporty Sunday with friends, football or whatever, which always ends up in the pub. Just the normal really. Cinema, nights out around here. My flatmate is a games designer, so I know I spend too many hours gaming with him. A few of us from work are wannabe food critics and try out all the posh places. All in the name of research for client events, obviously.”

  “Corporate sounds more fun. We don’t do wining and dining.”

  “Well, I’d love to wine and dine you,” he replied.

  I cringed inside at the clichéd comment, and a look on my face must’ve given my thoughts away as he apologised. Was he one of those guys that schmoozed his way through dates every weekend?

  “Sorry, that sounded like such a cheesy pickup line, didn’t it?” he frowned and his eyes crinkled up in a really cute way.

  “It kind of did, yeah,” I grinned at him. I felt glad I wasn’t the only nervous one after all.

  “What do you get up to outside of work then?”

  “I love to bake. Our office is always full of goodies on a Monday. I can make amazing brownies. Hanging out with Cassie, my personal matchmaker,” I joked. “And her two little girls. Most Sundays I go for a walk or hike with my other best friend Luke, to work off the brownies. Movies and popcorn are always good with me too. Plus yoga and pilates, we go to quite a few classes.”

  “Have you got a big family?” he asked.

  I shook my head. “Only child. Not a spoiled brat though, I promise. My parents live close, so I see a lot of them. You?”

  “Four sisters, I’m the middle child,” he looked happy as he spoke of them. “I get well and truly hen-pecked when I go home. Always end up escaping to the pub with my dad.”

  “Wow, big family! Bet it was fun growing up.”

  “It was,” he paused for a moment. “Can I ask you a question?”

  I nodded. “Yes. Of course.”

  “Cassie explained that you weren’t fully on board with her idea, and you’d been single for a while. She convinced you to meet someone - I’m glad it was me. She did vet me through a hundred questions, you know?” A quiet laugh escaped his lips. “Is she always that bossy?”

  “Always. Was it a bit weird? It was her idea. She wouldn’t let it go. I did tell her people would find it odd, like she was trying to pimp me out.” I watched him for a response as I sipped my drink.

  “It made sense, really, when she explained. At least she was honest. Most people would just go on those dating sites and lie. I was thinking about closing my account, but I got all intrigued by you,” he smiled again as he finished speaking and I couldn’t help but think how striking he looked. It was really distracting.

  “The only bit Cassie didn’t want to explain was why,” he said tentatively. “Why do you feel like you want to stay single?”

  “My last relationship ended in a horrible way. It made me think I didn’t want to go through anything like that again. He cheated on me, a lot. Turned out some friends knew and hadn’t said. Now ex-friends for obvious reasons. Long story short it ended with a restraining order.” I shrugged and concentrated on my coffee for a second, giving him chance to run a mile if he wanted to, which seemed likely. Why would anyone want to work through my baggage with me?

  “That’s awful. I’m so sorry he did that,” Zack reached out and stroked his thumb over my hand for a second. I held my breath. That didn’t freak me out like I thought it would. It was such a brief touch, but as he pulled away, I missed the sensation.

  “I get why you feel that way, but not everyone is like that, I promise. Believe me, being raised with four sisters, I’d never dare treat a girl the wrong way. They would kill me. Where is he now? I take it the restraining order worked?”

  “In Scotland, with a girlfriend and a baby. Feel bad for her,” I sighed. “Whenever he had a night out, or went on a lads’ holiday, he took home any girl he could. Doubt he’s changed. He hasn’t bothered me for a long time, he’s nothing to worry about. Anyway, how about you? Single through choice or broken-hearted?” I wanted to move the conversation on, close that little box in my mind where those memories lived.

  “No horror stories, no baggage. I just haven’t met the right person so far,” he took another drink of coffee. “I finished with my ex about three months ago, I could tell she wanted it to be more than it was. Didn’t seem fair to keep it going when I knew she wasn’t right for me.”

  The conversation got easier from there and before I knew it an hour had passed. As we laughed together, it didn’t feel as though he was a stranger. Cassie loitered outside, watching us, I pointed her out to Zack.

  “Well, I’d better let you get back,” he said.

  “I’m glad I came,” I admitted, almost wishing he’d touch my hand again. “It was lovely to meet you.”

  “I’m not going to put you on the spot,” he began. “I’d love to go on a proper date. Today has been so nice. I know you aren’t sure if it’s the right time but think about it
and let me know. I can’t tell you how much I want you to say yes, but even if it’s a no, I’m glad I met you today.”

  I promised to message him later as we walked outside together, back into the sunshine. Zack turned to look at me, and a wave of nerves crashed into my mind. What was I meant to say? Was he expecting to kiss? I didn’t know what to do as he leant forward and placed a single, soft kiss upon my cheek.

  “Speak soon I hope,” I stood there like a fool, processing how nice this had been. Enjoying this hadn’t been part of my plan.

  Cassie looked like she was about to burst with excitement, snapping me out of the trance. “Why didn’t you reply to my message?”

  As I pulled my phone out of my bag, I saw her message pop up, checking if everything was OK, and did I need rescuing. “Sorry, I didn’t hear it. We were talking non-stop, and it was loud in there. You know the noise those coffee machines make.”

  As we headed back onto the train, Lancashire bound, Cassie made me tell her every single detail. I left out the fact that my cheek still felt warm where he’d kissed me, the skin there felt more alive, if that made sense.

  “This all sounds so good. I take it you’re going to see him again? He looked good, a solid eight and a half, I would say,” she winked.

  “Cassie!” I scolded, but in my own head I was thinking maybe even verging on a nine. “Well, coffee was one thing, but a proper date? Then he’ll want a second date and then, before you know it, it’s a regular arrangement and-”

  “That’s the point!” Cassie interrupted. “That’s why most people date silly! You need a boyfriend, and I found a perfect specimen, so just say thank you and message him already,” she sat back in the train seat and scrolled through her phone with a smug smile.