Proving His Worth

by Cari Quinn

  Finally Sterling raised his head, nailing her with his gaze. The glitter in his pale-blue eyes might as well have been tiny ice chips embedding themselves into her chest. “I could’ve lost you, that’s what’s going on.”

  She waited for her eyes to fill. His expression, his voice, his touch—they all combined to make her feel shaky and yet somehow steadier than she’d been since she’d found out she was pregnant.

  She’d already had her breakdown for today. Now it was her turn to be strong.

  “No, you couldn’t have. Do you think I’m going down that easy? Hell fucking no. I fought for this. For you. For my kid. I didn’t want anything to be handed to me, so that means I’ve got a lot more proving myself to do.” She closed the hand he wasn’t holding a little more tightly around her paper band. “I picked out her name.”

  Sterling’s Adam’s apple bobbed. “Did you?”

  “Yeah. I was thinking Kaitlin. Because my mom’s middle name is Lynn and your mom’s name is Kate—aww, God, don’t,” she whispered, blinking hard when he simply lowered his face to their joined hands. “Please don’t. I don’t want to cry anymore. I want to be the strong one.”

  “Want to be? Look at yourself. You could’ve died, and when I come in here, you’re singing rap songs and smiling and stroking your stomach. God, if I didn’t love you already, that would’ve done it. As it is I can barely breathe looking at you.”

  She tried to swallow over the lump in her throat and settled on a smile instead. Everything really was going to be fine. “Is that why you won’t look at me for more than a second or two? Or is it really because of my colorful assortment of bruises? Yours are pretty hot, by the way.” She set aside her paper and stroked his forehead, slipping her fingers into his hair. “Hey, you’re getting my hand wet. Enough of that.”

  He rubbed his cheek over her knuckles. “I shouldn’t have let you go alone.”

  “It’s not your fault. I wanted to, remember? And what are you going to do, put me in a big plastic bubble to keep me safe?”

  “No. I went to kill him to keep you safe,” he murmured.

  Her breathing shuddered to a stop.

  “I didn’t do it.”

  She took a breath. Then another. It still didn’t ease the ache in her chest. “Sterling.”

  “God, I wanted to. I told myself I was just going to set him up, just get the evidence I needed to make sure he couldn’t escape. But when I had my hand around his throat, I could’ve kept squeezing. I was so tempted.”

  Panic reared inside her once again, the roar in her ears deafening her so that the beeps of the machines at her bedside disappeared. “He didn’t—this wasn’t—”

  He looked up, meeting her gaze. “Yes, it was, baby. I’m so sorry I didn’t keep you safe.”

  Ang shook her head, pulling away from him. “No. He’s not a good guy, but he wouldn’t try to kill me. He wouldn’t.”

  “Angelina.”

  She shut her eyes, the tears finally coming. “No. It was an accident. Only an accident.”

  Pete was a bastard of the highest order, but a murderer? Her mind wouldn’t accept it even while the truth resonated in the pit of her stomach, twisting there like coiled snakes.

  “He wanted the baby gone. But it didn’t happen. You’re stronger than he ever gave you credit for.” Sterling reclaimed her hand and rubbed his lips over her damp cheek. “He’s been taken care of now. I promise you, he’ll never get near you or our baby again.”

  “Taken care of how?” Part of her hoped he was dead. Wished for it with a ferocity that scared her. The rest of her didn’t want them to have to go through that too. He wasn’t worth the pain a murder conviction against Sterling would cause.

  “He’s alive, unfortunately. Alive and in jail. Jax helped me get him there, via the ER. He got hurt himself tonight. Not enough.” He exhaled and kissed her gently, his lips soothing hers. “Not nearly enough.”

  She wanted to press him for details, but they weren’t important right then. If today had taught her anything, it was to seize the moment. And that moment—their moment—was long overdue.

  “I guess you probably heard about the paternity papers he wanted me to sign,” she said, averting her gaze.

  “Oh yes. He couldn’t wait to tell me.”

  “I should have told you.” She made herself look at him. “It’s so hard for me to ask for help, especially since I was worried about boxing you into a corner you weren’t ready to be in. This—you and me—isn’t me looking for a daddy for my baby.”

  “Do you think I don’t know that?”

  “The timing’s been so completely sucky that I wouldn’t blame you if you weren’t sure.” She sighed and held up a hand when he would’ve spoken. “Pete signing away his rights only had a chance of sticking if there was a stepparent in place. Today I really began to let myself think that I could go ahead and sign those papers confidently because you want to be her father.”

  He nodded. The melting look in his eyes told her everything he didn’t say.

  “I shouldn’t have tried to save you from that stupid restraining order and I shouldn’t have tried to gallantly pretend that I’m not hoping with my whole heart that you’ll stick with me, with us. Most of this could’ve been avoided if I’d opened my mouth, and believe me, next time I will. When I was lying in that ditch today, everything got real clear.” Her lips quirked. “Well, after I managed to stay conscious for more than a minute at a stretch.”

  “Don’t joke about it. Do you have any idea what it would’ve done to me if—” He clenched his bruised jaw until a muscle twitched.

  “I’m here. Right here with you. And I’m not going anywhere.” Easing back, she fumbled for the paper band she’d abandoned at her side. “I have a very important question to ask you.”

  Sterling tipped his forehead to hers. “Yes.”

  Laughter bubbled up in her throat, erasing her tears. Or mixing with them, until her happiness and her sadness blurred into one inexorable whole. He’d make her emotions balance out. He always did. “You didn’t even hear the question.”

  “I don’t have to. My answer for you is always yes. Yes, I love you. Yes, I love our baby.” His damp eyes opened and fixed on hers. “Yes, I want both you and the baby to have my name, because you’re mine. God, please be mine.”

  “Oh, you’re going to kill me with talk like that.” At his grimace, she winced. “Sorry. Wrong choice of words.”

  “Absolutely.”

  She blew out a breath that ruffled the bangs not trapped under the bandage on her forehead and held open her hand. The paper she’d twisted into a ring sat in her palm. “It’s not gold or diamonds. Hell, it’s not even a cubic zirconia.” She frowned. “Do guys ever have fake diamonds in their wedding bands or is that only a chick thing? Sorry. Tangent. I was sitting here and it occurred to me that I’ve never been marriage material.”

  “Says who?”

  “Every book on relationships that has ever existed. I’m not the best bet going. I’m fickle, wild and impulsive. I even danced naked in the rain one time.”

  “Are these supposed to be deterrents? If so, try harder.”

  She had to smile. “I didn’t want to hem you in or make you feel obligated to help me and my kid.”

  “I never felt obligated. I wanted to do it because I care about you. You matter.”

  “Yeah, I do. I had to get there myself, you know?”

  “I know.”

  “I’ll need help now and then, and so will you, and part of the deal is accepting that on both sides of the table. You have to step back to give me the space to ask. And vice versa.” She tapped his cheek. “Hear that? If not, we’re going to have a problem. Just because I’m the female doesn’t mean I’m the only one who needs assistance.”

  “Coming in loud and clear.” Sterling shook his head, smiling faintly. “A lot of smart thinking coming from someone with a concussion.”

  “Maybe it knocked some sense into me.” She lifted a shoulde
r and made a face. Nope, not ready for those sorts of moves yet.

  “I’m still waiting for your question.”

  “Oh, right.” She cleared her throat and extended her hand to offer him the ring. “So, uh, will you marry me? Preferably soon, while I still look semigood in a dress?”

  His Adam’s apple bobbed again as he tugged something out of his jacket. “You stole my thunder, Ms. McFee,” he murmured, popping the top on a little black box.

  She blinked. Blinked some more. The yellow diamond surrounded by smaller diamonds didn’t vanish. “My paper ring looks really shitty compared to this.”

  “Homemade gifts are always the best,” he said, making her giggle as she threw her arms around his neck. Well, one arm, since the other was hooked up to an IV.

  Something else occurred to her. “When did you buy this?”

  “The ring?”

  “No, your boxer shorts. Yes, Vance, the ring.”

  “Days ago.”

  “Days ago,” she echoed, swallowing hard. He’d wanted to marry her days ago.

  Oh God.

  “Is that a yes?” he asked.

  “That’s a hell yeah, you bet your bitable butt.” At his laughter, she turned her face into his neck and took a good, long, heady sniff of his familiar scent. Her jittery nerves settled at once, like silk over satin. “I love you.”

  “Yeah,” he said gruffly, easing back far enough to slip the ring on her outstretched finger. She tried not to wiggle her hand impatiently, but man, it was hard. “I kind of figured.”

  “Now it’s your turn.” She pretended to measure his finger as she adjusted the tattered paper band. After managing to get it on his finger, she smacked her lips together. “Now you’re caught, Vance.”

  He flashed her a devastating grin. “And I caught you right back.”

  Epilogue

  Ang rubbed her plush bath towel over her hip while she listened to Brandy talk about knowing when to hold them and when to fold them. Since she only had about ten minutes to finish up before Kaitlin woke up from her nap, she didn’t have time to let Brandy meander. At nine months old, Kait never stayed quiet for long. “Are you quoting country songs now?”

  “Country songs are awesome metaphors for life.”

  “Says who? Guys with dead dogs and cheating, no-good exes?”

  “Listen, toots, just because you’re happier than a pig in poo doesn’t mean you have a right to piss on my cloud. If country songs give me comfort, so what?”

  “If country songs give you comfort, you need a change, girlfriend. Because you’re a heavy-metal chick if I ever met one. What happened to the days of Marilyn Manson and Buckcherry?”

  “They went the same way as your days of random hookups with emotionally stunted boys.”

  Ang patted her towel over her glowing cheeks. “That is true.”

  “So what’s new with you?”

  “Oh, the usual. Burping the baby, getting up with the baby, doing research, studying for school, going to class, writing a couple articles, getting tied up now and then by my gorgeous husband.”

  No wonder she was tired. Between her family and her job—only one now, since she’d finally given up the bingo hall—and her master’s degree program, she had a pretty active schedule. She wouldn’t be done with school for another year, so things wouldn’t be letting up soon. After that, she’d probably embark on another job hunt for something that more fully utilized her master’s degree.

  Either that or she’d collapse from exhaustion.

  Exhaustion aside, she was stupidly happy. Pete was no longer a factor. His parental rights had been terminated, and better yet, he was in jail, where he would remain for the foreseeable future. A witness had come forward to testify she’d been walking her poodle at two o’clock in the morning when Pete had been tampering with her car. Thanks to that and the tape where he’d practically admitted to wanting to get rid of her, he wouldn’t be seeing daylight for a good long while.

  She smiled and blotted water off her cheek. Her life had turned a corner into awesome. Soon, it would be taking another curve.

  “Uh-huh.” Brandy chuckled in her ear. “I’m totes jealous.”

  Ang laughed. “You so aren’t. You wouldn’t know what to do with a couple of kids. That’s not your scene.”

  “You don’t even have that.”

  Ang bit her lip and stepped back from the mirror, tilting her head as she let the towel fall away. No baby bump yet. She shouldn’t tell Brandy when she hadn’t told Sterling yet, but God, she was about to burst with excitement. “Actually, I kind of do. One’s only started to cook but—”

  “Gah! You’re knocked up again? Congratulations. Damn, you don’t mess around.”

  She laughed. “Sterling hates that term.” So much for that phrase being his safe words. He didn’t safe word out of anything they did.

  She gave the mirror a sly grin. And neither did she.

  “Sterling hates everything.”

  “He likes some things quite well.”

  “Like keeping you barefoot and preggers.”

  She stuck out her hip and examined her midsection from another angle. Maybe there was the slightest hint of a slope in the right light. “Yeah, he does like that. Though I have to admit I caved right away when he suggested us trying. It’s all Kait’s fault. She’s such a good baby. The next one will probably be a holy—”

  Sterling poked his head around the door, looking adorably harried. “K’s calling for you.”

  “Liar. She’s perfectly happy with you.” Ang bent to pick up her towel, her heart chugging like a locomotive.

  She’d been trying for the last few days to find the perfect time to tell him she was pregnant again, but they’d been so busy with the holidays and work. With Kait’s first Christmas coming up, Sterling had gone on a shopping frenzy. Her nursery looked like an ad for a children’s toy shop, and she couldn’t even play with most of the stuff yet. Between him and what their parents insisted on buying, they barely had room to walk.

  Happily, her mom and dad had walked the walk and talked the talk when it came to her and Sterling. How could they not? The man willingly gave up nights with his friends to mix up banana puree and buy things off the Home Shopping Network for the kidlet. So far he’d bought her a pink ten-speed bike “for a great price” and a working train set, neither of which Kait would touch for years.

  Ang barely hid a smile. At least they’d have two babies soon to use all of it.

  “No arguments there.” Sterling’s voice pulled her out of her thoughts. “But if I hadn’t come in here, I wouldn’t have gotten to see you naked.”

  “Like you haven’t seen me naked plenty, buster.” She turned back to the phone. “Hey, Brandy, let me call you back later, okay? Gotta cuddle the spawn.”

  “And the husband,” Sterling added.

  “Sure. Call me later. If I’m on the road and can’t answer, I’ll call you tomorrow.”

  “On the road where?”

  “Didn’t I tell you? I’m heading to Salem to chase my new dream. Should be fun.”

  “Salem, Massachusetts? Why, what’s there?” Ang’s head was spinning, and it didn’t help that Sterling had decided to come up behind her to help dry her back. Funny thing was, his hands kept slipping around to cup her breasts.

  “A new shop I’ve been hired to help run. It’s called the Velvet Vault.”

  “More lingerie? Stop that,” she whispered to Sterling.

  He only laughed and nipped the side of her neck.

  “Nope. Sex toys, made for and by women. Though men can get down if they want. We don’t discriminate. Talk to you soon. Oh, and keep an eye out for a box from me. I might send you some dildo samples. Happy for you, babe. Later.”

  Ang hung up and shook her head. “That was bizarre.”

  “Did I hear her say something about dildo samples?”

  “Yeah. I guess she’s moving to Massachusetts to work at a sex-toy shop. How random.” And totally Brandy, she had to
admit. She’d always admired the way her friend went after life with such gusto.

  “Huh. Sounds fascinating.” Slouching, he set his chin on her shoulder. “You have the most interesting friends.”

  “So do you, Mr. Equal Owner in Deuces Wild. About time. Chase is pretty tightfisted, huh?”

  “He’s easing up now that he’s properly distracted by his wife’s insane success. Plus he’s too busy eating pasta out of a can most nights to worry about me. Jax isn’t focused on the business either, what with planning the wedding. Who gets married at Christmas?”

  “We got married right after New Year’s.”

  “Yeah, but we had a time-sensitive element. We didn’t want to wait until after the baby was born. They don’t have a reason to rush.”

  “Yes, they do. Cass wants to try to get knock—I mean, with child right away.”

  “Oh. Why wait until they get married for that?”

  She had to chuckle. “Some people are traditional, darling. Not like us.”

  “True enough.” He lifted her up on the sink. “In any case, Chase and Jax are quite happy to dump things on my shoulders.”

  She grinned as she ran her hands over his biceps. “And what shoulders they are.”

  He flexed in the mirror. “Those martial arts classes are paying off.”

  “Mmm-hmm. Don’t forget all your supersharp PI skills. Running in the underbrush helps you stay buff.”

  “Sure. I do tons of underbrush running.”

  She leaned up to press her lips to his throat. “So where’d you leave the baby?”

  “Playing on the front lawn. She’ll be fine.” He laughed when she smacked his arm. “She’s still asleep.”

  “I thought you said she was calling for me.”

  “That was a small fib. I was actually calling for you.” He reached for his belt and waggled his eyebrows. “We have to take advantage of these rare moments of solitude.”

  “We sure do,” she said vaguely. Because they’re about to get even more rare…