Lizzie's Tale
Page 8
“I need to see you try to use this appeal on me, to get me excited. Imagine I am the first and most handsome man you have ever seen and that you desperately want me to feel the same about you. With that in your mind, I want you to take off my clothes and to do it in a way that makes me mad with desire for you.”
He stood in front of her and she sat up. His groin was almost in her face and she could see a bulge. She undid his belt and his buttons, his pants slid to the floor. Now she eased down the next layer.
She found herself curious to see what this part of a man looked like, the last time it had been dark and she had been trying to look away. She had never looked at a naked man this way before, and now it was only six inches from her face.
This purple-red thing came clear and poked upright. Almost without thinking she kissed its tip and took it in her mouth. It seemed to be the right and natural thing to do.
He groaned and put his hands in her hair. Then he pulled her head back up. “I think you are getting it pretty well” he said. He pulled off his shirt. She looked at his rippling muscles and maleness.
She felt an ache in that woman’s place of hers. It was as if her body knew how it was all meant to work. Her nervousness was gone now; she wanted this to keep going. Now he was kissing her and sucking her breasts. She arched her hips towards him, wanting more.
She saw him put a condom on. Then he was lying alongside her. She thought he would just climb onto her and do the sex act. But instead he caressed her body, rubbing her breasts and touching between her thighs. It was so pleasurable, and in return she stroked and touched his body and back, and then his maleness.
He rolled her on to her stomach and lifted up her hips. Now he was kissing that place, pushing his tongue into it. She started to pant and moan; there was no acting now.
He turned her back so she was facing him. “That’s how it should feel. But if it doesn’t that is how you need to act. There is nothing like a woman on fire to drive a man crazy.”
Now he laid her on her back and placed a pillow under her buttocks. “That is to put you in the best position to enjoy what is to come,” he said. He moved his body above her; she moved her thighs apart, pushed as wide as they would go. She arched her pelvis as she felt him begin to push inside her. It felt huge, like it was stretching her all the way as it went in.
Once he was fully inside he told her to lie there and get used to the feeling of him, and then to start to move herself against it, pushing up hard, and squeezing herself as tightly as she could. This would increase both their pleasure.
She moved her hips, tentatively at first, but it did really feel so good. Now she pushed herself hard and squeezed against him. He began to move too, coming up and down in time with her. She could feel tingles of pleasure spreading though her body. She felt her whole body was riding a rising wave of pleasure; he was the like the sea, pushing against her and pulling her along with him, as they both rose to the crest.
Just when she thought she could bear no more, she felt his fingers come into her, alongside his male part, focusing on a small point, just inside her entrance. The pleasure was exquisite, she could hold back no longer, her whole body was convulsing.
Now he drove into her with incredible ferocity. There was a moment, suspended in time, when his body arched and shook, just like hers was doing. They cried out in pleasure together as they wrapped arms around each other’s rigid bodies. Slowly it subsided.
They lay together, she stroking his head, like she would a baby. It was so much better than she had thought or imagined; a great unexpected pleasure.
After a few minutes he sat up and got dressed. He asked her if she had enjoyed it. She smiled back, a dreamy smile, and nodded. “More than I could ever have imagined.”
“Me too,” he said. “I have lots of girls, but with you it was something very special. When I saw how shy and nervous you were, at the start, I wanted to be the one to give the first real pleasure to your woman’s body, to show you how to enjoy it,” he said.
“Soon you will be doing this for a living, like I do. It won’t always be good like this. But I want you to know and remember this; this is the way it should be, a thing to be enjoyed between a man and a woman, done with affection and tenderness and without shame.
“For this work you have passed with flying colours. A job is yours, from tomorrow, if you want. Sometimes we will do this again, together, just you and I alone; perhaps sometimes for a whole night, so we both remember what it feels like when it is really good.
“Now you need to get dressed and take your child home. I must get to work. My job is to protect all the girls here. They are entrusted to my care. I let all the clients know that, while I will not interfere with their ordinary pleasures, I can be there in an instant if needed.”
As she walked back down the stairs to Rebecca, Lizzie considered her sudden initiation to this world. She had taken the first step to becoming a prostitute. Tomorrow she would take the next steps, repeating it with many other men.
Tonight was better, far better, than she imagined possible. She felt strange in her new found woman’s body. Towards this man she felt deep love for teaching her to enjoy this joining and for bringing this part of her being alive that she had not known was there.
In this, her new chosen life, it must be something to enjoy, not fear. She knew it would not always be this easy or this nice. But doing this act was something she could manage; she could polish her performance and become a true professional as time went by.
Only one thing bothered her; it was the transactional nature. She would like to keep doing it with this one person she really liked, not sell her body and this pleasure to whoever paid.
But there was no turning back now; she had run out of other choices. In her heart she knew that this was what the new Lizzie had become and she could never unmake it.
Chapter 9 - A Kept Woman
Lizzie settled in to her new life easily. It was like, even though her body was used in a way she would not otherwise choose, her mind remained hers, alone and untouched. No longer was there unceasing anxiety of how to pay for the tiniest things, a bed or a meal.
There was a communal kitchen used by the girls and the two men who worked on the premises. Madam, a well-kept lady of about fifty, was also a frequent visitor. She appeared almost motherly in the way she approached the running of her establishment, or perhaps like a boarding school mistress. She knew all the girls by name; she would stand for no nonsense. There were no drugs on her premises and while they all shared a drink or two, before or after work, to help get in the mood, there was no all-night bingeing or slovenly behaviour.
She said, “Other places may tolerate this, but I will not.” For those who did not like her way she said there were plenty other establishments they could go to.
She told them to act with pride, it was the world’s oldest profession and one to be proud of; it met the needs of men. Her clients were valued customers who must be provided with a good, honest service.
There were strict rules around the money. While the girls were free to take tips and these were theirs to keep, the fee for service was paid to the Madam or her duty manager in advance. She took her share, the house took a share, the pimps, who she called ‘house men’, were paid theirs and each week the balance was passed over for the girls to each use how they liked. The house fee covered the food, the drinks and the rooms where they gave the service.
She insisted that there be no favourites, all the girls could have their regular customers, but they must also take an equal share of the new ones and, while they could go with the house men when they chose, this was not to be exclusive or take away from their availability to their clients.
Most of the girls were young, not much older than Rebecca, a few were older. Some had their own rooms here, others lived away, but they all would often gather for a meal and a chat.
They were all required to take off at least one night each week, and they could choose which other nights they w
orked, as agreed out with the Madam, and written in a book.
All were required to use contraception, previously it had been limited to condoms and diaphragms, but now this new pill was available, they were encouraged, but not forced, to use this. Madam called it personal responsibility. Lizzie chose to take the pill, but insisted her customers also wore a condom.
They all had a health check each week, done by another experienced person here, and they needed to tell Madam at once if they thought they had caught anything. She also made them all pay a regular visit to the doctor, whose visits she arranged each month. It seemed remarkably orderly and far from Lizzie’s image of a seedy brothel. She knew she was lucky; there were many places that were not so good.
Rebecca, who she now called Becky, and she were like sisters, she was another Julie, someone who could be a friend for life. Rebecca had told her some stories of her early life, her father had also died young, but her mother had taken up with another man who she did not like and who had tried to molest her when her mother was not looking.
They both really liked Robbie and spent regular time with him, but it was not a jealous relationship, even though secretly Lizzie could feel herself a smitten by him, but they all knew the rules; kindness, affection but not exclusive love in this house. Those wanting that must move on.
One Monday night, a quiet night which both Lizzie and Robbie had off, she had spent a full night with him. It was really lovely, they mostly just talked, slept and cuddled together, with little Catherine lying in the corner in her pram.
She gathered her courage and told him about the night when she was raped, a thing no-one else except Julie had been told by her, not even Becky. She could feel anger in him about it. When she finished the telling he held her close, stroked her hair and said bad things happen in life and afterwards people have to move on with their lives like she was doing. She felt better and less bitter for his knowing; his strength was hers.
He told about his life before here, he had been a soldier in Korea, and watched two mates get blown apart. At first he had a death wish, wanting to kill all of them. But, as the months went by, he came to understand that he must not feed this hatred. It was a cancer; killing begetting more killing. Now he knew then he did not want to kill people anymore. So, as soon as a chance came, he demobbed.
He had come back to his home in Melbourne, but after life in the army he found it hard to settle into civilian life and do a regular job in some city firm, he needed life on the edge. He had stumbled into this work. He had always liked and enjoyed women, both their company and their pleasures. He loved all the girls and tried to give to them equally but, he had to admit, he had some special favourites, like her and Becky, even if he tried not to let it show.
In the small hours, when the only sound they could hear was each other’s breathing, they made love with great tenderness; it was as if they were lost together in a place beyond all known worlds.
As they lay together, after, she asked Robbie if he had ever been in love with only one special woman, so that all he wanted to do was to be with that person.
Robbie told her that before he went to fight there had been a girl like that; he would not say her name. For all those months away fighting he had stayed true and imagined she was too. He had stayed in the barracks and remembered her and desired only her when his friends asked him to come with them when they went with other women. But when he came back from his first tour of duty he found she was with another man. Then he realised he was not special to her the way he had thought. So from then on he had taken his pleasures where they came, and enjoyed many women. But each time a part of him was held back, lest he give himself too fully and not have it returned.
Then he said something which made Lizzie feel very special, “When I am with you, there is nobody else. That part of me, the part that stayed back before, it is not there anymore. All of me is lost in these moments with you.”
Lizzie said in return, “I have not been with anyone else that I cared for so I cannot judge, but when I am here with you everything else stops being real, there is only here and now, and I never want it to end. I cannot imagine feeling way that with someone else.”
At the end of their night Lizzie told him that if she ever had another baby she would like the father to be a person just like him, she was so glad he had been her first man after that awful night.
He replied, “If I become a father, I want someone just like you to be the mother.”
Secretly she just wanted to go away with him, for them to have a life where it was just the two of them, and from these words she knew a part of him would have liked that too. But it was not to be, at least not in this time and place.
One day she visited Sylvia, Evie’s old friend, to ask where Evie was buried. Sylvia walked with her to show her the grave. Sylvia said it was a disgrace; this man who had got all Evie’s money had not even paid for a decent funeral or a proper headstone. A tiny plaque lay on the ground, with a few dead flowers that Sylvia and other friends had brought.
Lizzie found the undertaker and gave him one hundred pounds of her money to make a proper headstone from white marble. She would have done more but that was the limit of her spare money just then; perhaps she could do more when she had more.
A month went by; Lizzie felt that, once again, that she had found a new home. It was like she had felt with dear Evie. She had taken the name Luscious Lizzie, as her working name and now she had a regular following of repeat customers who booked her at least once a week.
She did not think much about what she did, her work; it was just an act that her body went through. When it was done, at the end of each night she showered and washed herself, this was now also part of her act, symbolically washing these memories away.
Catherine was now smiling at her when she woke up. Each night, once she was finished, she would wake her baby to enjoy a bright smile and give her lots of kisses. Sometimes Catherine chortled with delight.
She now had three hundred pounds saved away and felt rich; others spent their money on clothes and finery, she spent only what she needed and saved the rest; the memory of her poverty was still too close to be wasteful and rely on good fortune.
Chapter 10 - Life Spins Out of Control
It was now mid spring, the days were longer and the sun was warmer. Most days, for an hour in the afternoon, Lizzie and Becky would sit on chairs in the sun at the edge of the footpath, while their children looked around and played. They both loved these times.
One day, as Lizzie was staring at Catherine, making little baby noises and trying to make her smile, she became aware someone had stopped in front of her, blocking the sunlight. She looked up. It was Evie’s Jack; he was smiling at her, as if a friend, but the smile was not real. He started to say something. She nodded, picked up her baby and went inside.
Becky followed, a minute later. “What was that all about?” she asked. “When you left he tried to ask me questions about you, but I did not answer and left too. But he knows we both work here, he said so. As I was walking way he told me we could expect a visit from him; he looked forward to becoming a customer and meeting us both in private.”
Lizzie cringed inside. She had never turned a customer away, but she could not bear the thought of being with this man. She told Becky what happened when Evie had died and how frightened she had been.
Becky took a deep breath. She said, “We almost never turn anyone away, but I think, if we tell Robbie and Madam about him, they will understand and not let him visit you, perhaps not even me.”
So they went and told the story, Robbie nodded, he seen this man around the town before, and knew he was trouble. He agreed he was a bully who could be violent, and may try to hurt or humiliate Lizzie. He said he would go and talk to Madam and seek her agreement that the business would refuse to let him visit either of the two girls.
He returned after a few minutes and said. “It is agreed, if he comes and asks for either of you he will be told that neither of you is
available. If he wants to book and come back later we will not agree to that either. We will tell him there are other girls available who he can go with if he wishes. If he does not like that he can go elsewhere”
Sure enough, that night, about nine o’clock, Jack arrived. He had been drinking and was full of cheer and bad manners. He put fifty pounds down and said that he wanted a turn with Luscious Lizzie.
This was politely declined; he was told she was unavailable. He said he would take a turn with her friend, the other one with the baby. Again this was declined and instead he was offered a choice of other ladies.
He said he wanted to make an appointment with Lizzie for the next night; told that also was not possible.
He asked, “How about an appointment with her friend?”
“Sorry sir, neither of these ladies is available for you.”
He started to get mad, to bellow and shout. Lizzie faintly heard him downstairs. Then the two house men each took an elbow and moved him outside. He stood there for five minutes, shouting abuse, until a helpful local policeman suggested that he needed to calm down.
Lizzie was told this when she took a break, an hour later, by Madam and Robbie. Madam said, with a half-smile, that she was glad to see the back of him; she’d do without such rude gentlemen in her establishment.
They all hoped this was the end of it, but Lizzie had a dread feeling inside, she sensed that this man was bad to the core, just like Evie had said and would not be stopped easily.
Two days passed and her anxiety faded. On the third day, a Thursday, as she and Becky were eating a late breakfast in the kitchen, Robbie came to see them, with an anxious look.