‘Look, we have this, this and this to do, but who among you cares? I know I don’t. After all, is it the end of the world? If I am successful will my life be perfect? Or will my girlfriend still have ended up pregnant by my best mate and then had an abortion without telling him or me?’
But he said nothing. He quoted the right figures and listened patiently to questions, desperately hoping somebody would say something to grab his attention. Finally, at around four o’clock, he was back at his desk drinking coffee and playing a game of solitaire on his pc.
‘Why don’t you get off?’ It was Em.
‘No, I’m alright. It’s nearly home time as it is,’ he answered, trying to sound leader-like and responsible.
‘We can cope for the rest of the day, we’re pretty well on top of this anyway,’ she said, gesturing to a folder in her hand. ‘Besides, you’ve done well to last this long by the look of you.’ Her tone was gentle and understanding but she wasn’t going to let it go this time.
‘I suppose. I am getting a bit light-headed. A good nights kip and then I’ll be spot on tomorrow,’ he said, the decision made. He stood up and stretched.
‘And remember what I said,’ Em lowered her voice a little, ‘about talking. Anytime.’
‘Cheers,’ he smiled at her warmly, appreciating the offer and the concern, ‘but it’s like I said. I’ll be okay.’ He changed the subject, ‘If anything goes horribly wrong, you know where I am.’ Then he shut down his computer, picked up his jacket from the back of his chair and walked out of the office.
Outside, Ben felt around in his pocket for his Metro return ticket and, as he did so, he realised that he’d no idea how frequently the trams ran. He walked around to Market Street and peered at the information boards. Luckily, and Ben was counting even the slightest thing that went in his favour as a reason to carry on, there was a tram due in the next five minutes.
Once on the tram it was all he could do to keep his eyes open, helped in no part by the gentle, rhythmic swaying of the carriage as it meandered along the line to Stretford. He decided to treat himself to a taxi home and dialled the number from his mobile to avoid having to wait at the other end. Quarter of an hour later he was home and felt pleased with himself. He’d battled through the day and had come out the other end, shattered, but free of breakdowns of any sort.
Still conscious of silence giving him space to think, he switched on the television and began to read the paper, with the intention of sticking something in the microwave a little later on. Moments later, his eyelids were beginning to droop and within five minutes he was asleep, the newspaper resting on his lap.
It was almost midnight when he awoke with a start to find that he was still on the couch but had no headache and didn’t smell of booze. He pulled himself to his feet and guided his exhausted frame up the stairs to bed, pleased with how the day had gone, hoping that he could repeat the feat for as long as required. For the second time that day, he felt he had cause to feel lucky as he drifted into a welcome sleep almost immediately.
Chapter Twenty-four
Katie looked at her reflection in the long mirror hanging in the hallway. She’d opted for casual dress for her date with Jack; a knee length black Replay skirt and a white vest top. Since it was sunny outside and had been hot all day, she decided to wear a pair of sunglasses on her head to complete the look, it wouldn’t be dark for hours yet so she wouldn’t look as if she was the sort of person who wore them in any weather as a fashion accessory.
Pleased with the outfit and deciding that it didn’t give off any signals that suggested she made a habit of getting plastered and throwing herself at men she hardly knew, Katie went outside to wait for Jack on the garden wall. Five minutes later he appeared around the corner of her road in a taxi.
They decided to go for a pizza before the film started as neither of them had eaten since leaving work. After a few moments of indecision, Jack suggested they share a single, large pizza. She agreed eagerly, and let him order the food along with a beer for each of them.
They chatted easily while they waited for their food to arrive and continued to pass comment to each other between mouthfuls of garlic bread. Jack talked about meeting I.T. Simon at university and how, since graduating, he’d struggled to find a permanent job. Katie told him about her job at Fontaine’s and skirted around the Dave issue when Jack asked why she was single. A few minutes later their pizza, a stuffed crust capricciosa, was brought to their table. Half an hour later they’d finished eating and were picking at what was left while they waited for the bill. Katie insisted on paying since Jack had made such a good impression on her and he’d been so understanding about her drunken bimbo behaviour.
‘We’d better make a move or we’ll miss the start of the film.’ Jack said looking at his watch. Katie nodded and finished her drink before standing up to leave. They strolled across the car park of the complex; a large affair containing a bowling alley and various food outlets, as well as the cinema.
Inside he sent her to buy popcorn while he bought the tickets. The usher led them to their seats and, as the lights dimmed and the music began, Katie decided she was having a great time and smiled in the darkness. The film itself was a remake of a Kevin Bacon film which featured a great deal of dancing. This proved to be a good choice since she got to make comparisons to the original and could afford to be distracted by Jack without losing the plot thread.
During the film, she could feel him looking at her and glanced across to catch him in the act. He looked embarrassed, like he’d been caught doing something wrong. She grinned at him and reached for his hand, turning her attention back to the screen. Jack took it readily and rubbed his thumb along hers, using their free hands to scoop popcorn from the box held between his right leg and her left.
Afterwards, Jack rang for another taxi to take them back into town for a quick drink before last orders. They went to a fairly trendy bar called Barabaco, which was in Castlefield, fairly close to where they both lived. It was quite dark inside, with minimal lighting above the large tables, each surrounded by comfortable sofas. They bought a bottle of red wine and sat next to each other. Katie rested her head on Jack’s shoulder and they talked about the film and about friends, including the I.T. boy, Simon.
‘Yeah. I thought that you’d have told him all about what a tramp I was. I was dreading seeing him on Monday. Needless to say, he’s the first bloody person I run into in the car park.’
‘But I thought you said you overheard him mention the gay thing?’
‘I did, but that never crossed my mind because I was too busy trying to avoid him. Then I just dived in before he’d a chance to say much of anything.’
‘It’s alright,’ Jack said, stroking her hair, ‘Si’s not camp gay, a lot of people miss it actually. He’s not the sort to fly into a temper and start making wild gestures with his hands.’
They laughed at the image and then the bell rang for time. There was a taxi rank around the corner so they left the bar and shared their third taxi of the evening. They arrived at Katie’s flat first and, for a second, she thought about inviting him inside but rejected the idea.
‘I had a good time tonight,’ she said, opening the car door.
‘Me too.’ Then he quickly leaned across and kissed her on the cheek.
‘I’ll ring you tomorrow.’
‘Excellent. Bye you.’
She waved at him as the taxi drove off then went inside. The first thing she noticed was the new message light flashing on the answering machine. She guessed correctly that the message was from Jen, doubtless wanting to quiz her about her night out with the new man. While Katie was removing her clothes to go to bed, the telephone rang again.
‘Hi Jen,’ she answered without bothering to check who it might be.
‘How was it then?’ Jen asked excitedly, also choosing to ignore the formalities of greeting or introduction.
‘Really good.’
‘And?’ Jen sounded exasperated.
&nb
sp; ‘What? We went for a pizza and to the cinema.’
‘I take it he’s not there now.’
‘No Jen, we got a taxi and he went home.’
‘Cool. Are we seeing him again then?’
‘Oh yeah. I said I’d ring him in the morning actually.’
‘Nice. So you had a good time then, despite there being no sordid sex tales to tell.’
Katie sighed at Jen’s crudeness. ‘Yes, I had a nice time. Besides I told you. I didn’t sleep with him last time, he was a perfect gentleman.’
Jen scoffed, ‘Yeah yeah, so he says. Either way, I hope it works out. It’s about time you had some luck with the chaps.’
‘Fingers crossed. If nothing else he’s distracting me from being miserable about Dave.’
‘Don’t even waste your breath saying his name, let alone getting upset thinking about him,’ Jen commanded.
‘I’m trying my best, it’s just hard. Anyhow, I’m knackered so I’ll speak to you tomorrow.’
Katie lay back in bed and pulled the bright red duvet up to her chin. She’d done this ever since she was a child, following an awful nightmare about a masked man breaking into her room and shooting her while she slept. From then on, she’d been unable to sleep without something covering her, even in summer. She smiled sleepily, bits of her date with Jack replaying in her head. Thoughtful, funny, gorgeous Jack.
The following morning she awoke with ease feeling fresh and inspired about the day ahead. She showered and dressed and felt light as a feather as she breezed into the office quarter of an hour early. The morning passed in a flash for Katie thanks to her good mood and high spirits. At lunchtime, instead of spending her break sitting in the canteen, she dashed into town to run some errands. After buying a few miscellaneous items, she went to buy a birthday card for her mother. She then found a florist and went inside to arrange to have a bouquet sent to her parent’s house. She was just picking out a suitable display from the window when she was surprised to see Jack trotting down the street outside. He was laughing and smiling with a tall, attractive blonde woman. They were walking next to each other, almost touching shoulders, obviously quite comfortable.
Katie froze on the spot, her eyes transfixed by the sight of her Jack, quite happily walking down a public street, where anybody could have seen him, with someone else. As she watched, they climbed into a car further down the street and drove off together. She was stunned and continued to stand in the shop window, until the voice of the shop assistant brought her back to her senses.
She left the shop, dazed and confused, and walked back to work, telling herself that there must be a logical explanation for what she’d seen. That tall, gorgeous girl with half the fat of your average Katie could’ve been anyone, a work colleague or a close friend. Despite spending the afternoon trying to convince herself that it was all perfectly innocent and that she’d be foolish not to give Jack the benefit of the doubt until she’d spoken to him, by the time she left the office to go home she was thinking the worst and felt angry and betrayed.
At home, she checked her messages to see if he’d called. Of course he hasn’t. He’s rolling around with that skinny blonde, laughing his head off. She was becoming more and more agitated; her trust in Jack had been fragile already due to her disastrous track record with men. Thoughts of how Dave the Absolute Bastard had lied to her filled her head, the thought of it happening again scaring her.
She spent an uneasy night turning over possibilities in her head, trying to convince herself that Jack would have an explanation and that, when he gave it, it would be the truth and she’d believe him. After trying to distract herself with television and a lengthy bath, she finally gave up and went to bed, angry, confused and uncertain about Jack.
Ten minutes later, Katie was lying in the dark unable to sleep, her mind racing with images of Jack and the blonde. Suddenly the telephone, which was placed on the bedside table next to her, began to ring. She grabbed it and answered it without bothering to switch a light on.
‘Hey you’ said Jack gently, ‘Just ringing to say goodnight to my favourite girl. How come you haven’t phoned me?’
‘I’m in bed,’ she replied curtly.
‘Oh right. Are you alright?’ He sounded concerned.
‘No I’m not. Who was she?’ Please let it be an old friend. An old friend with a terminal illness.
‘You what?’ He sounded surprised. Or guilty.
‘Just tell me who she was Jack for fuck’s sake. I can’t do with being arsed about, not after Dave.’ She was getting upset now and he picked up on the quiver in her voice.
‘Katie,’ he tried to laugh, ‘I don’t know what you’re going on about.’
‘Oh, please don’t lie to me Jack. I bloody saw you with some slag in town today. Some blonde piece all tarted up. You were laughing and everything.’ She was trying hard not to cry now.
‘Blonde piece?’ He paused.
‘So who was she then?’ Katie demanded. ‘You’re seeing her aren’t you?’
Please don’t be seeing her. Please!
Jack laughed again.
‘Don’t you dare laugh at me you shit. Don’t you dare!’ She slammed the telephone down on the bed and lay back on the pillow, breathing heavily. Seconds later the phone began to ring again.
‘What?’ She snapped.
‘Are you going to listen to me now?’ He sounded angry himself now.
‘Go on then. Tell me.’
‘It was my sister,’ Jack offered simply.
She scoffed at his feeble attempt to lie. ‘Fuck off. You never mentioned a sister. Who the hell is she?’
Jack was annoyed now and raised his voice, ‘I’m telling you it was my sister. Why would I lie to you?’
‘That’s just what Dave said to me over and over.’ Katie found herself desperately wanting to believe him but she was so scared of being hurt again.
‘I’m not Dave,’ Jack said, more like his normal tone now, ‘I’m telling you the truth Katie. Really I am.’
She thought for several moments about what he’d said but the images of him and the girl would not leave her. ‘I don’t believe you,’ she said finally, ‘I really want to, but I just can’t.’
He sighed, ‘Oh for God’s sake Katie. It’s not my fault that your last bloke was a dick. I’m not lying to you but I won’t sit here and listen to you slag off my sister and be shitty with me when I’ve done nothing wrong. I’ll talk to you tomorrow when you’ve calmed down. Night.’
She heard the click as he put his telephone down and was left, miserable and perplexed in the dark. Bloody hell. It might have been his sister. It really might. But she was so gorgeous and thin, and I’m so little and fat and horrid. He must be seeing her and it’s my fault for being crap.
She tossed and turned all night, pondering what he’d said to her, wanting to accept it as the truth. Yet all the while there were doubts. What if she did believe him and then he hurt her like Dave had? She couldn’t go through that again. But she didn’t want to lose Jack; she’d fallen for him instantly and loved being with him. In the short space of time she’d known him, she’d grown so close to him and now this had happened.
The following morning she was out of bed before her alarm went off, tired and grumpy. She showered and made herself a cup of coffee, unable to face any breakfast. After turning everything over in her head time after time, she couldn’t see any reason why Jack should lie to her. Dave had lied to her because he’d wanted sex, and he was an utter shit of a man who only cared about himself. Jack, on the other hand, had nothing to gain by hiding anything from her. She was already more than willing to sleep with him and certain she’d enjoy every minute of it. Still unsure, she went to the front door to collect the newspaper and the post. There, on top of the pile of letters, but underneath the newspaper, was a plain white A4 envelope with her first name written on it. She ripped it open and pulled out a photograph. It was a portrait of what Katie assumed to be Jack’s family. Jack was standing next to an
older man in a suit who in turn was holding hands with a woman. Next to her was a younger woman, the blonde girl that had been with Jack. Katie smiled at the picture, relief washing over her as she reached for the telephone.
‘I got your post,’ she said when Jack answered.
‘Good. I assume that it clears up the whole blonde slag thing for you.’ He still sounded a little annoyed at her.
‘I’m really sorry about that, it’s just that I flew off the deep end when I saw you with her. I thought I was going to get hurt all over again and…’
‘Shush. I know. That’s why I brought the picture round. I’m sorry you were so worried but I’ve no intention of fucking you about.’
She felt bad for how she’d reacted, but wonderful that he was being so great about everything, again. ‘You’re great you know. When did you bring the picture over?’
‘Middle of the night. I couldn’t sleep because you’d got me so wound up so I thought I’d stick that through your door or we’d have been fighting over it for ages.’
‘I’m glad you did. I’m still sorry about what I said.’
‘Does that mean you’re going to make it up to me then? I was really offended.’ He was being suggestive now and she responded.
‘Oh, I’m sure I could probably get round you somehow,’ she said coyly.
‘I doubt it. I was very pissed off. You’d have to make some effort.’
Katie was enjoying the game and was becoming excited by it. She suddenly had a flash of inspiration. ‘You know how you’re a mad Liverpool fan?’
‘Yeah. And?’
‘I assume you’ve got one of their shirts then?’
He realised what she was driving at. ‘One or two. Why?’
‘Perhaps you could lend me one for a bit, next time you come over.’
‘Mmm, brilliant. What might you be doing tonight?’ His voice was keen.
‘Whatever you like,’ she said in her best breathless, telephone sex operator voice.
That evening, just after seven o’clock, Jack appeared at the front door with a bottle of wine and a carrier bag containing a Liverpool home shirt. She took the shirt and directed him to the kitchen to open the wine. He poured them a glass each, then turned when he heard a door open behind him. Katie stood in the doorway wearing a pair of black strapped, high-heeled shoes and his football top, though on her short body it looked more like a football dress. His eyes widened as she walked over to the couch and sat on the arm, slowly crossing her legs to afford him a full view of her.
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