by Anna Hill
Going to Resa’s to find Angelo was a huge moment of hope for me, and after it got dashed in the worst way, I felt a shift in my behavior. I wasn’t even sleeping in bed with Lio anymore. I slept in Angelo’s bed alone… and each night, I tried to conjure him.
Each night I failed.
I loved Lio just as much as I loved Angelo. And yet without Angelo around, I felt incapable of loving Lio. It was crazy to think I once believed I was only meant to love one man… that wasn’t true. I was meant to love two, and if I couldn’t have one, it destroyed everything. It affected the very foundation I built.
I needed them both.
I feared if Angelo really had died, if I'd truly lost him, things would never be the same between Lio and me. I would never be able to love him in the same way. That happy ending we always talked about? Maybe wouldn’t be so happy.
And, again, perhaps that was just part of my destiny. I was destined to meet these three men and they were fated to help me on my journey, but did that really mean we were fated to all be happy together? No, that wasn’t in the prophecy. Only that I saved Elderan.
So maybe my life was supposed to be hell, but I save Elderan in the process.
If that was what my life amounted to, then so be it. My people needed me. Happiness wasn’t a necessity.
I could hear footsteps come up from behind me.
“Are you ready?” Lio asked.
“No,” I said quietly, “but I guess I have to be.”
“Are you… afraid of confronting Jacob?” Lio asked in confusion, since I'd never expressed any fear of Jacob in the past.
“Not at all. Not Jacob. That’s not what my fear is about.”
Though I hated it, today was about more than just Jacob.
Today I was returning to the home I grew up in. The home where all my happy memories occurred. This was where my parents brought me home from the hospital, where I learned to walk, where my parents would read to me, where we watched movies and laughed together…
And where I found their dead bodies.
I did not return to that apartment after being released from the hospital. At first I couldn’t, because it was an active crime scene and they had to clean it up. And then I couldn’t because it was a new month and the rent was due, but obviously, I didn’t have it, and my parents didn't leave me anything. At least, that I knew of. Maybe that was part of Robert’s plan too. Maybe my parents did leave me money, but Robert wanted me isolated and penniless so I’d fall right into Jacob’s arms.
Regardless, this was the place where I’d experienced the greatest trauma of my life, and I’d never been back. I never planned to ever go back. And no doubt there would be a lot of feelings that came with that.
I only hoped I could arrive before Jacob so I had time to process them. And, of course, I hoped I didn’t fall apart.
I couldn’t bring myself to talk about this with Lio. It was like he had said, I was starting to push them away again. And I knew exactly why.
It was the same fear that I had after losing my parents. I let myself get immeasurably close to Angelo, falling madly in love with him, and now… Now he was gone, and I was in pieces.
So I didn't want to get closer to Lio or to Rhyion. Not when they could suffer the same fate. Hell, maybe they would. Maybe I’d be sitting on that throne all by myself at the end of this, living out my lonely days as a fair but unhappy ruler.
Wasn’t it better to protect myself a little bit from that trauma than continue to rely on them and have them ripped away? I knew even losing Rhyion would devastate me, and we weren’t romantically involved.
“Let’s just go,” I said, as Rhyion stepped out the door.
They both nodded and I took their hands and imagined the place where I had experienced all of my childhood memories. It was the easiest place I’d ever had to conjure in my head. It took almost no imagination at all.
We landed directly in my old living room, and as we did, it felt like my heart stopped.
All these memories came flooding back to me.
The apartment was totally empty. Nobody was living there, and all our stuff was moved out, of course. So the walls were empty, and it made it feel a lot less like home. But still, I recognized everything. I was suffocated knowing exactly where everything used to be, and what had all occurred here within these four walls.
I had to wonder what happened to all that stuff. I certainly didn’t get any of it. I mean, we didn’t have a lot, but we had a television and stuff. It would have been worth something.
Why didn’t I ask for anything back after they died? I supposed the thought never occurred to me. I guess that was another benefit of the medication Jacob used to keep my powers under control… it made me careless too.
Maybe I’d ask Jacob about what happened to everything…
Before I killed him.
“Are you okay?” Lio asked softly.
“This is… where I grew up,” I said quietly. I looked down at the carpets for the first time, and I was horrified to see that they were still stained with my parents’ blood. It didn't look exactly like blood—it was fainter, and more of a brownish stain—but I knew what had been there. I knew where it was.
I didn’t cry, to my surprise. Maybe I was just too numb to cry.
“It makes sense that this would be hard for you,” Lio told me.
“Yeah,” was all I responded with.
I considered going into my old bedroom, and then into my parents’ old room, but I decided against it. That would only serve to fill me with more memories, and I just couldn’t handle that. I had business to take care of. I couldn’t handle the emotional toll of going through my entire house right now.
I had to try to center myself.
I felt something else in the house, though… Something I wasn’t expecting to.
I smiled softly as I said it aloud. “Angelo is alive.”
Both Rhyion and Lio looked at me. “What?” Lio asked.
“I couldn’t feel his aura back on the island, but now that I’m in Elderan… I do feel it. He’s alive. I just get the faintest sense of him, but… he’s here. He’s not gone.
Relief flooded over me. I was still incredibly worried of course, but knowing that he wasn’t dead was huge for me. I really wasn’t sure. I worried every day over the fact that I couldn’t get in touch with his aura.
I wondered if now that I was in Elderan, I’d be able to reach him telepathically. I considered conjuring up his image and attempting to reach him.
But I didn’t have time to consider it because there were footsteps at the door.
My heart pounded in my chest as I saw the doorknob jiggle slightly. It could only be Jacob.
And I was ready for him.
Lio and Rhyion both stepped up at my sides, standing right behind me as Jacob entered.
I was staring at the door, facing him, so he saw me immediately and his jaw dropped.
For a moment, he began to step backwards, no doubt he was considering running away, but I quickly stopped him when I lifted him up off the ground and pulled him inside, slamming the door with a wave of my hand.
“Leaving so soon?” I asked. “You’re not happy to see me.”
I could see the worry on his face, but he did his best to play it cool as I set him on the floor, still standing up.
“On the contrary, I’m totally happy to see you. A little earlier than I thought, but you know, what’s a little timing issue, really?”
I narrowed my eyes at him. “Are we going to do this, then? Talk in riddles?” I asked.
“Nah, probably not. I don’t imagine you’re going to let me. So, go ahead, Annabelle. Ask whatever you want to. Find out whatever information you want.”
“Why are you here?” I may as well start at the beginning, since I could ask him questions as long as I wanted. I had all the power here.
“For you, of course.” He smiled. “I wanted to meet you here.”
“Bullshit. You look pretty damn surprised to s
ee me.”
He sighed. “Like I said, it wasn’t the timing I wanted. I expected to see you here a while later. I was just here to prep the area for our meeting. But you’re already here, so, guess I can’t do that.”
I looked around the apartment. “Makes sense, I guess. You wanted to trap me again, of course you’d do it in the apartment where my parents died. You’d want me feeling my weakest, right?”
He shrugged. “That was the intention, yeah. Get you all flustered.”
“And how were you going to get me here?” I asked.
“I had my bait.” He smiled mischievously.
I hated his smugness. Even when he was the one beholden to me and my demands, he had this arrogance about him.
“Well, congrats, Jacob! Because the real bait was you. I came here solely for you.”
He raised an eyebrow. “And how did you know I’d be here today?” Then he smirked. “Wait, was it that sweet old lady? Elf bitch? Was she the one who clued you in?”
Hearing him mention Resa filled me with rage. “Were you the one who killed her?”
“Nah.” He laughed. “Just in on the plan. But I regret not being the one to do it myself now that I know she led you to me.”
Anger filled me, and I put my hands up. I imagined putting my hands around his neck and he instantly began to choke. I didn’t even have to touch him.
“You fucking bastard. She was just an old lady! She had nothing to do with this!”
He gripped at his neck like he was trying to tear my hands off, but it was no use because my hands weren’t really there.
“Don’t kill him, Annabelle,” Rhyion said urgently behind me. “You haven’t asked everything you want to. We still need him.”
I dropped my hands, and he instantly began to suck in great gasps of air.
He didn’t look too smug now.
“Congratulations again, Jacob! You get to live for a few more minutes! And I guess that gives you a chance to explain to me what kind of monster kills a little old woman in her house.”
His cool attitude faded, and anger overcame his face. I could see it most clearly in his eyes.
“A monster? You’re the goddamn monster, Annabelle. You’re the creature that belongs in the depths of hell. I’m human, I’m normal.”
“Normal? Human? I don’t think so. You know, I could imagine you lying and deceiving me to get in Robert’s good graces—you always had been pretty desperate for approval and attention. But killing for him? I really thought you were better than that. Despite it all, I thought I knew what lengths you would or wouldn’t go to.”
He shook his head. “You don’t know me at all, Annabelle. Everything you thought you knew about me was a complete and total lie. The Jacob you knew was a Jacob I made up. So don’t pretend you know what I’m capable of or what I desire. I don’t need attention or approval, Annabelle. Not in the slightest.”
“Then what are you doing this for, Jacob? Why go through all this trouble for Robert?”
He scoffed. “You think I’m doing this for him?” He laughed with a hoarse voice. “This is about so much more than Robert. I’m doing this for the cause. It’s a cause I believe in, that my ancestors fought for. To end witches. Your powers are obscene. You are freaks of nature.”
I laughed. “Freaks of nature? Have you seen yourself lately?”
“Laugh, Annabelle. Laugh. But you know the truth. Deep down, you know you’re an abomination. Your entire kind is.”
“Then why not just kill me, if I’m such an abomination? Oh, wait! That’s right! You’ve been harnessing my magic and you needed me around! The magic that is such an abomination to you. And yet you didn’t mind harvesting it from me, did you?”
His eyes widened, he clearly didn’t know that I knew this. “Sometimes, you must fight fire with fire. That’s all I was doing. To destroy you, we needed that magic. That’s what makes you such an abomination. Your kind forces us, normal humans, to use magic. That’s the only way we can compete with you. No species should have so much power over another.”
“That’s very fucking rich, coming from you! Look at what kind of power the humans have now. And not even all humans! No, just Robert and all the evil people like you who help him. You guys control everything. You have unimaginable power over the country. And you’re kidding yourself if you think Robert’s only using magic because he wants to destroy me. Please, he loves the power!”
“Don’t talk ill of my king, Annabelle,” he said, in a biting tone.
“Oh, yeah? Who’s going to stop me? You? I hate to break it to you, Jacob, but you’re not the person in power anymore. You have nothing now. You aren’t walking out of this situation alive, you do know that?”
He nodded slowly. “I accepted it as soon as I walked in the door. The plan wasn’t yet in place. I wasn’t ready for you… If I had a few more days, I might have actually captured you. But I’ll admit, you’ve got me bested this time. So, yes, I accept my death. But I’ll choose to go down while I tell you how despicable I believe you are.”
“If you think I’m truly so despicable, how could you live with me for years? How could you pretend to like my family? I don’t think we disgusted you as much as you claim.”
“Of course you did!” he snapped, he seemed angrier at that accusation than anything else. “I did what I had to do to play my role. It was an important one—a role I held near and dear to my heart. I would have done anything I could to fulfill my job. But don’t get it twisted, I hated every second of it. Pretending to love you… It went against every instinct I ever had.”
“Is that how you were able to allow Robert to kill my parents?” I asked. “You really hated them so much that you wanted them dead?”
“Allow Robert to kill your parents?” he emphasized.
I knew what he was getting at. “Right, right, you don’t allow Robert to do anything, huh? He’s the king, you’re the lowly servant, blah, blah… Regardless, I take it you didn’t fight to keep my parents alive. You had to know what was happening that day, and you didn’t warn me. It takes a truly evil person to see a family day in and day out and think nothing of their demise. No cause is worth that.”
He shook his head. “Annabelle, you misunderstand completely. Robert didn’t want your parents dead.”
Maybe I didn’t know what he was getting at.
“What the hell are you talking about? Of course he did.”
“No, he didn’t,” he said. “Why would he? It’s like you said, he needed the magic. He was adamantly against killing your parents. Two witches meant double the stores of magic.”
I looked over at Lio and Rhyion, who looked equally as confused as I was.
“There was nobody else who’d want to kill my parents besides Robert. I don’t know what you’re even suggesting… That they really were randomly murdered? You don’t really expect me to believe that?”
“Not at all,” he said, returning to his cool-as-a-cucumber tone. “Of course they weren’t randomly murdered.”
“Then who are you saying killed them?’ I asked, growing impatient.
He smiled. “Me, of course.”
I gritted my teeth. “What?”
“Oh, please. Don’t pretend that you didn’t hear me. I did it, Annabelle. I killed them myself. Against Robert’s wishes, with no outside instruction, I murdered them.”
I felt sick to my stomach. “You… couldn’t have.”
He laughed. “I absolutely could have. And I did. They’re dead because of me and only me.”
“But… why?” I gasped. “Why would you do something like that if Robert didn’t tell you to do it? Why would you ever be motivated to do that on your own?”
The smile never left his face. “One day, Robert came to me. Told me I was no longer assigned to your case. Told me that your mother was beginning to have dreams about me, that she knew I had ill intentions, that she was going to figure me out. So I couldn't work with you guys anymore. He wanted me to switch schools, move back to my o
ld town, and go about my life as if it had never happened. But, see, I couldn’t do that. Because the role that I had in your lives was incredibly important to me. It was the only thing in the world that mattered to me at that point. I desperately wanted to be an important fighter in this war against witches. So I killed them myself. Problem solved, Mommy wouldn’t discover me anymore.”
I wanted to believe that he was lying, that this was some tall tale he was telling just to infuriate me. Just to give me one more moment of torture before I killed him.
“You’re lying. Robert wouldn’t tolerate you going against his wishes."
“Oh, he was mad,” Jacob admitted. “He let me have it. But in the end, he realized he couldn’t let me go now. I was too valuable. I was the only person in your life. You relied on me for comfort. Hell, for even a place to live. If Robert got rid of me, how would he get to you? You surely wouldn’t have trusted anyone new in your life after your parents’ death. Keeping me around was Robert's only option, and I promised I’d make up for breaking his trust by doing a phenomenal job with you. And I did.”
I thought back to that night. “That's why… you were there. That’s why you showed up so fast after I got home. Even though you were begging m to come over and hang out with you at your place."
“And that's also why I begged you to hang out with me!" he said. "I wasn’t ready for you to find out yet. I wanted to talk to Robert first. I was hoping you’d stay the night and I could make a plan for the discovery. But when I realized that wasn’t going to happen, I got to your apartment as fast as I could in order to control the narrative to the best of my ability. Thankfully, it worked.”
I wanted to throw up. I'd never been more disgusted with a person in my life.
I let this man into our world…
And he murdered my fucking parents.
I lit a circle of fire around him. I was burning the carpet, but I didn’t care. Horror crossed his eyes.
I was out for blood.
“Annabelle, wait! We still might not have all the information we need!” Lio said desperately.