Persuading Austen

by Brigid Coady

  Why would she go from one house where she was looking after people to another? When did she get to be her?

  Or did they not want her to be anything but trapped in the idea they had of her?

  ‘Aunt Lil …’ she began.

  ‘Think about it,’ Lily said, talking over her. ‘You won’t get a better offer. Oh look at the time.’ Lily gathered her skirts and swept out.

  What the ever-lovin’ …

  She wanted to scream, I had a better offer and you persuaded me to give it up.

  Because Annie realized if she ever thought of a kid, they had their father’s big green eyes. And, not that she had thought about it much, that child was riding on a set of broad shoulders. Almost identical to a set she could see out of the corner of her eye.

  What she wouldn’t give for a bottle of Ichihoko right now. No matter what they thought, she wasn’t going to be dating Will. Ever. Not for the sake of the family’s PR or the production.

  She’d compromised herself enough. She had done everything asked of her and they had taken.

  And was this the new ask? To spend her life in a loveless relationship popping out kids to keep them happy?

  No. It stopped here. She thought back to Eric’s threat. The less than subtle ‘solve the finance issue, keep your private life private, and we’ll take you places’ offer. Could this be her lifeline? A rope she’d been thrown. Because if she stayed in London she was always going to be pulled back in.

  She needed to find out who was stealing the money.

  Annie stabbed at the salad on her plate. The only person left she hadn’t confronted was Les.

  Why would Les steal though?

  Annie couldn’t work out why he needed cash. But who knew what secrets he had? This called for research; she needed motive and proof. Eric would expect nothing less.

  Annie got up, ignored Harry’s hand signals to join them, and walked back to the production office.

  ‘I’ll get you,’ she said, ‘or die trying.’

  She chuckled; obviously some of the family drama genes were running through her veins.

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  Hours later Annie stared in shock at the website that popped up. As soon as she got back to the hotel after work, she’d got access to Les’s memos and instructions, and noticed some weird URLs and transactions on his production credit card. Had she missed all this because she was so certain her family were to blame?

  In all the hours she’d spent investigating Les and tracking the dodgy URLs and transactions this is not what she expected to see. Gambling sites were her first thought or some illegal porn.

  But not this.

  It looked like someone had vomited rainbows and glitter on her laptop screen. She wasn’t against rainbow or glitter but this was like a million unicorns had shat all over the site.

  Unicorns. She flinched. That might have been more acceptable to the pastel-covered cartoon horses that were cantering across the page, with their manes and tails flicking and spraying sparkles everywhere.

  Why the hell was Les trying so hard to hide a My Little Pony fan site?

  Annie knew he had some sort of fascination; she wasn’t completely blind to the pin that he had on the lapel of his jacket. But this …

  She saw that the page had a store. She clicked on the link.

  ‘Holy crap,’ she breathed as the store page loaded and she looked at the prices.

  ‘A hundred thousand dollars for an original limited edition My Little Pony Flutterby?’ she said.

  Who the hell spent that kind of money on a piece of plastic from the Eighties?

  And suddenly as if the glitter and rainbows had cleared the fog from her brain she knew exactly where all the money that had vanished had been spent.

  She scrolled further down the page, fascinated and repulsed in part. It wasn’t that she had an issue with anyone having a passion. Hell, she had a fine collection of milk jugs that her mum had started and she’d found herself adding to it when she saw an interesting one in a shop.

  But My Little Pony …

  ‘Horses for courses,’ she said and then started laughing when she realized what she’d said.

  But then she clicked the link to the next page. An ‘18 and over’ button flashed up asking to confirm her age before it would load the next page.

  How were My Little Ponies more than PG or even PG-13, never mind restricted?

  She clicked on the button.

  Fu … Annie couldn’t even finish the swear word in her mind.

  She stared at the newly loaded page. She knew she wasn’t sheltered. Annie had heard of pony play, but even she knew that you would usually find links to it on websites with a little less rainbow and a bit more leather.

  But this … well it seemed you could make a fair price selling yourself out as … the only way she could describe it was maybe a My Little Pony cosplayer, but one that did ‘extras’.

  She looked at the price one of the Fluttershy ‘cosplayers’ was asking for one night.

  She wasn’t definitely not in the right profession. But she was probably the wrong gender to make a killing on it. Plus some of the ‘extras’ looked uncomfortable and well …

  Annie quickly shut the laptop and rubbed her hand across her mouth.

  Well now she knew where all the money was going, how the hell did she confront Les about this?

  ***

  Annie could do this. She wondered whether she could get a badge with that written on, or add to her tattoo collection. She seemed to spend a lot of time thinking it.

  She’d confronted Dad about his sleazy whisky commercials and tried to explain to him that dating the blowsy model draped over him was a bad idea.

  She had listened to the dodgy audiobooks … She shuddered at the memory of Immy in the throes of literary passion.

  You can definitely talk about My Little Pony.

  To a grown man.

  Who has embezzled thousands on his obsession.

  Yeah, she could do this. And maybe one day laugh about it.

  Annie stood outside Les’s office on set. She had to do this. And she’d rather not involve the police or the other producers just yet.

  She raised her hand to knock. Her hand quivered as she waited to do something, anything.

  Do it, Annie, she told herself. This was her moment. If someone also found Les’s issues and that she knew about them and never said anything then it was all on her. No Hollywood, no agency.

  Just family life.

  Her knuckles rapped on the wood.

  ‘Who is it?’ Les’s voice came from inside. ‘I said I didn’t want to be disturbed.’

  Annie really hoped there was nothing nefarious happening on the other side of the door.

  ‘It’s Annie, Les. I need to speak to you.’

  ‘Can’t it wait?’ He sounded out of breath.

  Annie could feel her body cringing into itself. This was not looking good.

  ‘I need to speak to you now.’ She leaned against the door, speaking through the wood so that she wasn’t shouting and bringing attention to them both. No one else needed to know about this.

  ‘Annie, I’m busy. We’ll speak later.’

  Okay, she thought, she’d have to bring out the big guns.

  ‘Les, I know about Flutterby.’ She couldn’t believe she’d had to say that out loud. Mind you it wasn’t as if choosing to use Twilight Sparkle would make it any less ridiculous.

  There was silence from the room.

  Annie stood back from the door.

  It opened a crack and Les peered through the gap.

  ‘I don’t know what you are talking about …’ His face was pale. He was biting his lip but there was a thin sheen of sweat on his forehead.

  Annie would’ve known he was lying even if she didn’t have the internet browsing history and dwindling budget to prove it.

  ‘Les,’ Annie warned and pushed her shoulder against the door.

  After a tussle where Les tried to keep her o
ut, she pushed through.

  At first glance there didn’t seem to be anything out of order. Why was Les trying to keep her out? Then she heard it, the neighing sound from Les’s desk.

  They both froze, Les staring at Annie, his eyes wide.

  And then Annie leaped to turn the laptop on the desk around.

  ‘No!’ Les’s voice cracked as he launched himself after her, his hands scrabbling on her arms as he tried to stop her from seeing what was on the screen.

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  ‘Oh my God!’ Annie couldn’t help screaming.

  She wanted brain bleach and to scrub her eyes with wire wool.

  ‘It’s not what you think,’ Les said as he crumpled to the ground.

  ‘So I didn’t just see a grown man dressed as …’ Annie didn’t want to check again to see which exact Little Pony the well-endowed gentleman in question had been dressed as ‘… Flutterby?’

  ‘It was Twilight Sparkle,’ Les muttered.

  ‘Okay but whether it is Flutterby, Twilight Sparkle, or the cast of Sesame Street with added Care Bears …’ Annie looked down at Les who had curled up in a ball on the floor ‘… we’ve got a problem.

  ‘Look, Les, I don’t care what floats your boat. I really don’t. You can spend all your spare time and everything you earn on Beanie Babies banging.’ Huge chunks of her childhood were being besmirched. ‘But that would be your own money. This here, you’ve been spending production budget on this and that is not okay.’

  ‘No, I haven’t,’ Les said, his voice muffled from where he had his head buried in his lap.

  ‘Les, if I look at the site for Mr Sparkles here, which credit card will it be on?’ Annie made the mistake of looking at the screen as she gestured towards it. Was that even physically possible, she thought as she stared mesmerized at the sparkling toy the man had in one hand that he was using whilst simultaneously flicking his rainbow mane out of his eyes.

  She was never going to be the same again.

  ‘Annie …’ Les whined, almost in harmony with the whinnying from the laptop. She wondered of she could mute the laptop? Or maybe she should just shut it?

  She wrenched her gaze away to look down at Les, who looked less like a Hollywood hotshot and more like a sulky teenager.

  ‘Les, I don’t want to have to call the police but I will. Whatever happens I need to take this to Eric and the other producers. It is my job they are threatening at the moment. I think it would be best if you came completely clean about exactly what has been going on.’

  ‘But …’ he spluttered. ‘What about my reputation?’

  It was ridiculous; God save her from vain people.

  ‘How much reputation do you think you’ll have when you are dragged away in handcuffs on set. Because that is what is likely to happen if you don’t agree.’ Annie could feel her confidence growing.

  ‘But …’ he stuttered.

  ‘Les, we can get you help. I’m sure there is a self-help group out there for you. Because this isn’t healthy; this is an addiction.’ Annie wondered if there was such a thing as Bronies Anonymous.

  Les crumpled even more.

  ‘Okay,’ he muttered.

  Annie dug her phone out of her pocket and dialled.

  ‘Hi, Cassie, can you organize a meeting with the producers. ASAP. If they can’t make it to London then it will have to be video conferencing.’

  ***

  ‘Annie, we can’t thank you enough for sorting this out for us.’ Eric’s voice came through the speakers of the conference phone. Annie and Cassie sat on one side of the meeting table at Mansfield Films offices. It was the same room Annie had met Les in months earlier. He sat in the same place he had then but looked like a broken man.

  ‘You really are everything we’ve been led to believe.’

  ‘Too kind,’ Annie muttered, going even redder than she had when she’d had to explain exactly where the money had gone. Luckily the producers had believed her without her having to resort to clicking on Mr Sparkles’ website.

  ‘I think we all agree it is too late to replace Les as director at this point, but we are putting you in charge. Nothing is spent without your sign-off.’

  ‘Okay,’ Annie said.

  ‘And, Les.’ Eric’s voice hardened. ‘We’re hiring a psychiatrist to come and see you tomorrow to determine how we can support you till the end of production. And if you want any kind of future in this business, you’ll listen to them. Understood?’

  ‘Yes,’ Les whispered towards the table, his head bent forward so Annie couldn’t see his eyes.

  She did notice that his My Little Pony pin was no longer on the lapel of his jacket.

  ‘One more thing, ladies: I’ve been thinking that you should be thinking of opening a Northanger Agency LA office, very very soon. I think Annie would do well over here.’

  Did he really say that?

  Eric shut down the conference link.

  Had he …

  Annie turned to Cassie to see her beaming at her.

  ‘Looks like you’re off to Hollywood, my friend.’

  ***

  There was something liberating about not living with family, Annie thought as she walked from the station to the hotel. Admittedly they were still in the same hotel but so far removed they didn’t live in her pocket. There was space and calm even with all the cast and crew there. And after the afternoon she’d had in London, the train trip back to Hertfordshire had been an oasis of calm in spite of delays and having to go through Euston, her least favourite station.

  It was fifteen minutes from the station to the hotel and for the first time in a long time she was on her own.

  And she had a shiny new job offer.

  Could she squee? She wanted to. Wanted to shout it from the rooftops.

  They wanted her in LA.

  This was it. Her time. There wouldn’t be an AustenWorldTM. That had gone. This would be AnnieWorldTM. It was her time to shine. She only needed to make sure this production got to the end with no more mess and then she was gone.

  Annie snuck her way around a few dedicated fans who were camped out by the gate of the hotel. She kept her head down. She might have been all over the internet recently with all the crazy rumours about which of the cast she was sleeping with but she could still do mousy and quiet if needed.

  Any oasis was rampaged over as soon as she got into the hotel. Annie wasn’t sure how word had got out about Les but she was nabbed as soon as she was through the door.

  ‘So, cuz, what is this I hear about our fearless leader spending the production budget on drugs and gambling?’ And of course, Will was right at the front, seeming to know everything even if the details were wrong.

  ‘Look, Will, I don’t know what you’ve heard …’

  ‘I heard that he was caught doing coke off the back of a transsexual dwarf …’ Jillian was behind Will, her eyes wide and her hands like claws reaching for Annie.

  She felt as if she was going to be devoured by them and their need to know every tiny detail. Annie couldn’t do it. She remembered Les crouched on the floor with the sound of his obsession ringing out round the room. He might be a sad weak man who’d stolen but he didn’t deserve to have everything paraded around for a few minutes’ laughter for someone on their commute.

  ‘I don’t know what you heard, but it was just a production meeting to talk about the stories that seem to be coming out of the set. Stories that, may I remind you, don’t always have any truth in them.’ Annie could feel herself standing taller as she stared first at Will and then at Jillian.

  ‘We producers decided that if we find the culprits the full weight of the contracts they signed will be executed.’

  She couldn’t help but smile when she included herself as a producer. She hadn’t flexed that muscle at all on the production. Was that one of the problems – that she thought of herself as still an accountant?

  Will’s mouth tightened although he kept a smile on his face.

  Yeah, you kn
ow how much that will cost you, she thought, knowing which clauses Will had been playing fast and loose with.

  ‘Fair enough – come on, Jill. It looks like Little Miss Killjoy isn’t going to tell us anything.’

  Annie heard a snort from behind her.

  ‘Vultures.’ Austen was standing with his arms crossed. Harry and Lewis flanked him.

  They really did look like the three musketeers.

  ‘You okay?’ Lewis asked as Austen glowered at Will’s retreating back.

  ‘Yeah, I’m fine …’ she said her legs beginning to shake. How had she not realized she was this tired?

  ‘You need to sit down,’ Austen said still glaring at Will as he spoke, but he managed to grasp her arm above the elbow.

  One day she would get used to being touched by him. But today wasn’t the day. She could feel each of his fingers as they tightened on her. The way he redirected her towards their little table behind the plants. Her heart raced as they gently traced their way down her arm and she sat before he let go.

  ‘We’ll just go get some drinks,’ Harry said and then let Lewis drag him off to the bar.

  There was silence. Annie yawned. She was going to be a producer. In Hollywood. It was eight years later, but maybe not completely late.

  She looked over at Austen. She could still see the boy in him when he frowned like that, his lower lip jutting out.

  ‘Is it true?’ Austen asked.

  Was what true? Had he heard about the job? Oh, he probably meant Les but it wasn’t her story to tell.

  ‘Is what true?’ Annie could feel her heart beat faster the same way it always did when he spoke to her.

  His fists clenched on the table and he looked torn as if he wanted to not be there even though it had been his idea.

  ‘You, Will. What they …’ Austen coughed and swallowed. ‘You know, the gossip sites?’

  Annie frowned.

  Okay, so not about Les.

  ‘What about Will?’

  ‘That you and he are … together?’

  Oh crap, so now Austen believed the garbage that was in the papers and online. And did he not hear what Will had just said to her? How she had reacted?

  ‘Why does everyone believe that? How are they taking a few photos and blowing it out of proportion.’