Plain Jane in the Spotlight

by Lucy Gordon

  She hoped he didn’t hear the little gasp that burst from her. She knew he didn’t really want to marry her. She’d been prepared for rejection, polite excuses as to why their relationship could go no further. This sudden reversal sent a jolt through her like a burst of lightning, but she controlled herself, assumed a smile, then her most cheerful tone to say, ‘I’m serious.’

  ‘So am I,’ he said.

  ‘No, you’re not. It’s one of your daft jokes. I blame Jackson. The pair of you are like a couple of school kids.’

  ‘Then obviously I need a good teacher to keep me in line. But I take it you don’t fancy the job.’

  ‘I don’t think I’d be up to it. It would take more than me to keep you in line.’

  ‘No, just you. You’re the only one who’s ever come close. Even Mom admits that.’

  ‘Oh, she wants to hand over the job of being your mother, does she? Thus freeing her for a succession of toy boys.’

  His smile almost made her heart turn over. ‘Something like that.’

  She could hardly breathe. Beneath the teasing atmosphere, something serious was happening.

  ‘Well?’ he murmured.

  ‘Well…the fact is…I’m not sure I’m up to the job.’

  ‘You mean you don’t think you could put up with me?’

  ‘Maybe yes, maybe no. I never rush big decisions.’

  ‘Then take your time.’ He kissed her cheek. ‘We’ll talk again later.’

  He vanished into the shower, leaving her stunned, not only by him but by herself.

  Why hadn’t she leapt at his offer of marriage? She loved him deeply. She wanted nothing more than to be with him for the rest of her life.

  But his own feelings fell short of hers. That was the fact that she must face. He’d asked her because he’d decided to take Joe’s advice. His career was going well. His relationship with Amos was going well, and he wanted to consolidate everything by making a sensible marriage to a woman who could care for him as no other woman could.

  The temptation was fierce. Seize the chance. Make the best of it. What else does life offer?

  If possible, she would have dismissed her sensible side, but it hammered on her brain for admittance, reminding her how devastating was the decision she must make.

  To marry him, knowing that her feelings were far greater than his, and his merely practical affection could never reach the heights of her passionate adoration. Or refuse him, walk away, knowing she had left this vulnerable man at the mercy of what life would do to him.

  Nonsense! This is a grown man. He doesn’t need you to protect him.

  But he does.

  OK, so he marries you and you give him the children he wants. He’s grateful and affectionate, and for a while everything is lovely. But then he gets infatuated with some sexy little bimbo. Maybe he won’t leave you, but will he be faithful to you?

  I don’t know.

  Yes, you do. Admit it.

  I don’t know!

  CHAPTER TWELVE

  LIKE everything else in La Couronne, the wedding area was magnificent. Chandeliers hung from the ceiling, gilt decoration adorned the walls.

  ‘It’s glorious,’ Harriet said to Charlene, ‘but I still prefer the ceremony Darius and I had on the beach at Herringdean.’

  ‘That sounds lovely,’ Charlene agreed.

  ‘It was lovely,’ Travis said. ‘Especially with the dog there. How is Phantom, Harry? I know everyone was afraid he wouldn’t live much longer.’

  ‘He’s managing to hold on. Every day is precious.’

  ‘I’m longing to see what Cassie looks like in her wedding dress,’ Freya said. ‘She’s so beautiful that I could hate her if I didn’t like her so much.’

  The room was packed. Marcel had few friends but many business acquaintances who appreciated the invitation, and much the same could be said for Cassie.

  At last Jackson and Leonid entered, then Amos and Janine. Amos looked proud and magnificent. Nobody, Charlene thought, would have dreamt that he’d come to this wedding against his will.

  Now Marcel appeared, taking his place at the front, with Darius, his best man. At last everything was in place for the bride’s arrival.

  As Freya had predicted, she was astonishingly beautiful. Charlene knew a pang. It wasn’t fair that one woman could be like that and another… She looked down disparagingly at herself.

  Marcel turned to watch his bride approach, and Charlene drew a sharp breath at his expression. It was possessive, adoring and slightly incredulous, as though he couldn’t quite understand how such good fortune was his. That was how a man ought to regard his bride, she thought. It was how Travis would never regard her.

  The voice of common sense echoed in her mind.

  Time to face facts. Yes, I know you hate the thought, but listen. He doesn’t really love you. Not as you love him. And he’s never going to, you know that, don’t you?

  I guess I do.

  So be sensible. Get out now.

  But that means abandoning him when he needs me.

  That won’t be your problem.

  Loving Travis will always be my problem. I can either love him at a distance, wondering how he is. Or I can love him close up, doing everything I can to make him happy.

  And being hurt yourself. Think about it.

  The same look was on Marcel’s face when he finally led his new wife back along the aisle, followed by applause from the congregation.

  Then the photographs, a dozen different combinations of family members. In one, Amos stood with all five of his sons. This was followed by pictures of Amos with Darius and Marcel, then Jackson and Leonid.

  ‘Wait,’ Amos called. ‘We haven’t finished. Travis, get over here.’

  And so it came about that Travis was the only one of Amos’s sons to be photographed alone with him.

  ‘Yes,’ Charlene murmured happily. ‘Yes, yes, yes.’

  The reception was a riot of speeches and champagne. Watching the bride and groom, Charlene saw the same look she’d seen on Marcel’s face earlier. Darius too looked the same whenever his eyes fell on Harriet.

  Would he look at you like that, at your wedding? demanded the sensible voice.

  Probably. He’s a very good actor.

  At last the guests began to leave. The goodbyes were said, and the rest of the evening became an extension of the family reunion. Cassie and Marcel were staying in Paris that night, leaving for their honeymoon next day, when the rest of the family departed. Travis, Charlene was glad to notice, was deep in conversation with Leonid, whose grim air had vanished in the pleasure of his brother’s company. As she passed by, both men reached out to catch her hand and drew her to sit with them.

  ‘I was saying how glad I am to meet my brother again,’ Leonid said, ‘and how sad that tomorrow we must say goodbye, and not know when next we meet.’

  Charlene was inspired.

  ‘But that’s easy,’ she said. ‘The show filmed an episode in London, so why not an episode in Moscow?’

  ‘That’s brilliant!’ Travis exclaimed.

  ‘But you are going to do the film,’ Leonid protested. ‘Will you have time?’

  ‘I haven’t got the film yet, and even if I do there are TV episodes to shoot first. I’ll talk to them about this as soon as we get back to LA.’

  ‘And they will say yes because you are a very big man and they do as you wish,’ Leonid said triumphantly. ‘Just wait until you get to Moscow and I can boast that this is my brother.’

  He seized Charlene’s hand and kissed it.

  ‘Thank you for your idea. You are a genius. Travis, your lady is a genius.’

  ‘I know that,’ he said, regarding her with fond gratitude.

  ‘Come on, I only suggested it.’ She laughed. ‘If they do this it will be to please Travis.’

  ‘True,’ Leonid agreed. ‘Travis is the great man. But a great man needs a great lady beside him all the time.’

  ‘He certainly does,’ Travis said firm
ly. ‘Damn! Why does the phone have to ring now? Hello, Joe!…What’s that?’ Suddenly his face brightened. ‘Are you sure? It’s not a mistake? That’s great. Yes, I’ll make a note of the date. Next month. Right.’

  ‘What is it?’ she asked.

  ‘It’s the nominations for the TopGo Television Drama Awards. Joe’s had some advance notice.’

  ‘And you’ve got a nomination?’ Darius demanded. The family were gathering around them.

  ‘More than one, apparently. Joe, how many? How many?’ He looked around frantically. ‘Paper-paper-’

  Jackson produced a scrap of paper. Leonid shoved a pen into Travis’s hands. Now everyone was riveted as he began to scribble.

  ‘That’s four!’ Marcel exclaimed, reading over his shoulder as Travis hung up. ‘Four nominations?’

  ‘Let’s see,’ squeaked Harriet. Seizing the paper, she began to read aloud. ‘“Award for the best performance by a leading actor in a television series. Award for the best comedy performance by an actor in a television series.”’

  ‘It’s a con,’ Travis groaned. ‘There was one episode that was played for laughs, so someone’s been pulling strings to get me this nomination. It doesn’t mean a thing.’

  ‘Stop being modest,’ Jackson ordered. ‘It doesn’t suit you. What else is there?’

  ‘“Award for the best dramatic performance by an actor in a television play,”’ Harriet read. ‘You do one-off plays as well?’

  ‘I did one last year. Just one.’

  ‘And “best contribution to an educational feature,”’

  Harriet read.

  Travis’s brothers roared with laughter. ‘Education?’ Darius echoed. ‘You?’

  ‘Very funny.’ Travis grinned. ‘I made an appearance in a couple of documentaries. I told you, it’s a con. Somebody’s fixed this.’

  ‘Of course,’ Marcel declared. ‘Nobody could ever think you were “somebody” just because you’ve got more nominations than the rest.’

  Everyone cheered and applauded, raising their glasses in salute, while Travis looked modestly embarrassed even through his laughter.

  Amos took the paper from Harriet and studied it.

  ‘It’s a fix,’ Travis repeated. ‘Nobody gets as many as that unless someone’s pulling strings.’

  ‘Of course,’ Amos agreed. ‘Obviously this is about boosting you for the film part. You will win everything. Your incredible achievement will be in the papers, and the part will be yours. Excellent.’

  ‘You think that’s good?’ Travis queried.

  ‘If you want something to happen, you have to arrange for it to happen,’ Amos told him. ‘Clearly you are supported by big, important people.’

  It was clear that Travis had gone up in his estimation. In Amos Falcon’s world this was how things were done.

  ‘You mentioned a date next month,’ Amos said.

  Travis nodded. ‘The award ceremony is on the fifteenth, in Los Angeles.’

  ‘Splendid. I shall be there.’

  ‘And me,’ Marcel said at once. ‘And Cassie.’

  ‘And me,’ Darius added. ‘And Harriet.’

  Jackson and Leonid joined in, and with dizzying speed it was set up. All Travis’s family, even Amos, would be there for his great event. Both professionally and personally, this would be his night of glory.

  On the way up to their suite he was incandescent, whooping, ‘You did it! You did it!’

  ‘No, you did it,’ she protested.

  ‘Don’t argue with me. You did it. Come here!’

  He pulled her hard against him, kissing her with a fierce eagerness that brought her own desire rioting to the surface, overwhelming her despite her good resolutions. Only the sound of the elevator doors opening brought them back to earth.

  ‘Come on,’ he said, heading for their suite.

  Once inside, he held her face between his hands, smiling into her eyes.

  ‘Leonid’s right,’ he said. ‘I need you beside me, so now you definitely have to marry me.’

  ‘But-’

  ‘No buts. I won’t take no for an answer. Say you’ll marry me.’

  ‘Travis-’

  ‘Say yes. Say it.’

  Overjoyed but bewildered, she searched his face, desperately trying to understand something that could never be understood.

  ‘Say it!’

  ‘Yes,’ she whispered. ‘Yes.’

  ‘You mean it? You won’t change your mind?’

  ‘I mean it.’

  ‘Prove it to me.’

  No need to ask what he meant. Even as he spoke, he was drawing her down onto the bed, and she went eagerly.

  In the days after their first loving they’d been wary of each other, making her wonder if it would ever happen again. Now she understood how terrible that would have been. Never to have touched him again, or feel him touch her, never again to know the sweet thrill of being close to him, then closer until finally they were each other’s with a completeness that made her dizzy with delight.

  He loved slowly, even hesitantly, as though the first loving had left him still in doubt. But that was his way, she thought, trying to think clearly through a haze of pleasure. It was hard for him to be truly confident, even now, but surely it was in her power to find the way for him. With her arms firmly around him she gave herself up to the sensations and emotions that were like a new world: the world they would find together.

  When he was asleep she rose and went to sit by the window, watching his still form on the bed. Common sense was still raging at her, and she knew she must tell it to stop its nonsense once and for all.

  You did it. You gave in, settled for second best.

  Travis could never be second best.

  But what he’s offering you is second best, and you know it. Is it coincidence that it happened tonight? You proved your usefulness again with that Moscow suggestion, and now he’s definitely not going to let you go.

  I don’t want him to let me go.

  But what’s he offering? Love?

  I don’t know.

  Yes, you do. He’s not in love with you, not the way you are with him.

  But he needs me, and I’ll be there for him. And if…if one day it’s over, I’ll still be glad of the time we had together.

  This is the twenty-first century. What happened to liberated woman?

  I guess I’m not very liberated where Travis is concerned. And that’s fine by me. I’ll love him and cherish him, and give him whatever I can. And if he’s happy, that’s all I ask. Now go away and don’t come bothering me again.

  Silence!

  * * *

  Back in Los Angeles, everything was humming as preparations were made for the big night. Rumours had gone around about what was to happen, and the announcement about the film that was expected afterwards. Everyone who was anyone was determined to be there.

  One disappointment was that her grandparents couldn’t make it. Their holiday would be over just two days before the award ceremony, and they would be too tired from the long flight home to embark on another to Los Angeles.

  ‘Could they change the flight?’ Travis suggested. ‘Come straight here from Africa, then stay with us for a while to get their strength back before returning to London?’

  But when Charlene suggested this to Frank on the phone, he thanked her but refused.

  ‘Emma’s worn out. She needs to get home. We’ll watch it on television. You’ll hear us cheering.’

  ‘What a shame,’ Travis said. ‘It would have made everything perfect to have them there, especially when we tell everyone our news.’

  He planned to cap the evening by announcing their engagement.

  ‘I’d better do it when I receive the first award,’ he mused, ‘in case there aren’t any others.’

  ‘You know how many there are going to be,’ she said. ‘This is going to be your night.’

  His night in every way. Two days before the event, his family began to arrive. Amos, Janine and Freya dined
with them and Charlene was struck by the look of pride and satisfaction on Amos’s face.

  He’s got what he wanted from his father at last, she thought. At least, he’s nearly got it. Don’t let anything happen to spoil it now.

  Her dress for the evening was a magnificent dark blue velvet with a tight waist and long flowing skirt. Travis helped her on with it, and zipped it up.

  ‘I like that blue,’ he said. ‘It goes well with this.’ He showed her a ring of diamonds and sapphires.

  ‘Let me wear it now,’ she begged.

  ‘No, we agreed I’d give it to you when I make the announcement.’ His eyes were teasing. ‘Until then, you’ll have to be patient.’ He kissed her.

  ‘I’ll try. Oh, Travis, I hope tonight is everything you hoped for.’

  ‘If you’re there, it will be. Hell! What’s that?’

  ‘My phone. Hang on, I’ll get rid of them quickly.’

  ‘Charlie?’ It was her grandfather’s voice. ‘Something terrible’s happened.’

  ‘What?’ she asked, but she knew the answer before he spoke.

  ‘Emma’s had a heart attack, a big one. Oh, darling, they say she might not last the night.’

  ‘Sweet heaven,’ she whispered.

  ‘Can you come? It could be for the last time. She said I wasn’t to call you because you had this other thing happening but-’

  ‘Of course you were right to call me,’ she said, almost violently. ‘I’ll be on the next plane. Which hospital?’

  She wrote it down and said, ‘Tell her I’m coming. Tell her I love her.’

  ‘Emma?’ Travis asked as soon as she hung up. He’d been watching and listening, motionless.

  ‘She’s had a heart attack. She’s dying.’

  ‘Then we’ve got to get over there fast. There’s a flight this afternoon.’

  ‘We-? No, Travis, you can’t come. You’ve got the awards ceremony and those people will be there-your family-’

  He stared at her. ‘Are you seriously saying that you think I’ll put all that stuff first? Before you?’

  ‘You must. You can’t miss tonight when there’s so much hanging on it. I know you’d come with me if you could, and I’ll treasure that. But you can’t. Surely you can see that you can’t?’