True North

by S.M. Winter

he nodded.

  “Why can’t I remember?” I frowned and played with my lower lip, which felt numb.

  “Because you’re not meant to remember me yet,” he said. “But I remember you.”

  He touched my nose and I laughed, clapping my hands together. They seemed much smaller than they used to be. I felt like I’d just won the lottery. I looked over at the boys on the blanket and they seemed to be no more than babies as they slept. As I watched they seemed to grow into men, then back to children again.

  “Will I get to meet you soon?” I wanted to know.

  “Soon enough,” he said standing again. “Be patient.”

  “Will I remember you this time?” I asked, following his departure with my eyes.

  “Not this time,” he said. “But soon. Now sleep.”

  So I did.

  Waking from a vision as soothing as my dream had been was difficult, but wake I did. The boys still slept beside me so I did my best not to wake them as I climbed out of bed. As nice as the dream had been it faded, as any dream does. What one minute ago it had felt extremely vivid, now seemed bland and unworthy of my attention.

  My first thought upon waking had been to research something, but I couldn’t quite put my finger on what it had been. I puttered around the room while the boys continued to sleep, trying to remember I felt it would be unwise to leave them alone so soon after yet another tragedy.

  Chauncy had taken the sword to put in the weapons room. I think he really wanted to study it, as did I. Until the boys woke, I wouldn’t have an opportunity. I sat in one of the chairs in my room near the hearth and soaked up the warmth while I leafed through one of my books on control. It had all types of suggestions for different personality and Element types. I tucked away the information for later use. Lost in my reading, eventually I felt a tug on my sleeve.

  Both the boys sat on the floor watching me read. I wondered how long they’d been there.

  “Good morning boys,” I uncurled from my seat. “Would you like some breakfast?”

  At their nods I stood and took their hands, trying to reinforce our connection. I wasn’t sure how I would be able to let them go to an orphanage. Perhaps we could keep them on the island for a while.

  I watched as the boys eyes popped wide at the assortment of food on the buffet table. I was more than a little surprised as well. Where normally there were fruit, eggs, toast and other normal breakfast fare, today there was an abundance of sweets. Cakes, cookies, doughnuts and all types of yummy looking food. There was even a chocolate fountain. I calculated in my head the cavity expenses but quickly shoved it aside when they both squealed in delight and ran for the table. Their plates were piled high within seconds and they both carefully walked to the table, so as not to drop a crumb.

  Chauncy, Valerie and Alexandar were already there. I found a small warmer filled with eggs and toast to fuel myself and sat between the boys. Two tall chairs had been stuck on either side of my seat. The boys chatted endlessly with the others at the table while I picked at my food. It was a relief to see that they had forgotten their plight, at least for a little while. It gave me hope to see their resiliency. Before too long, they sank back into their quiet demeanor and began picking at their food as I was.

  “You know boys,” Alexandar cleared his throat. “I made a special request for this food to be made for you.”

  “That reminds me,” I looked up. “Who cooks the food and tends the hearths? I’ve never seen anyone.”

  “Ah, well,” Alexandar seemed delighted as if I’d just helped him with something. “That would be our faerie staff.”

  “Faeries?” The three of us said together.

  “Why yes,” Alexandar’s grin spread and he looked at me. “You haven’t seen them because you don’t believe.”

  “Of course not,” I scoffed and turned back to my food.

  “I saw a little dancing flame add wood to the fire last night,” Tad turned to me, eyes large.

  “You did not,” Thomas stuck his tongue out.

  Tad’s lower lip began to shake and it finally occurred to me what Alexandar was attempting to do. I sighed at my density when it came to children.

  “You know,” I forced a smile onto my face. “I think I saw that too.”

  Tad’s eyes immediately dried and shone with a hint of worship.

  “You did?” Though he had been skeptical of his little brother, Thomas was completely trusting of my opinion.

  “Mhmm,” I began to eat with earnest though I wasn’t hungry.

  “Wow,” Thomas turned to his food and followed suit.

  “Can we catch one?” Tad wanted to know.

  “Hmm,” Alexandar winked at me. “Well now, let me think. There are a few ways to catch faeries.”

  While I mentally cringed, I kept an outward air of excitement. It was like setting the boys up for Snipe Hunting. The few times I’d met my grandfather he’d attempted to get my sister and I engaged in similar quests. He had described the Snipe in great detail and told us how to catch it, only to laugh at our antics. I had caught on quickly and abandoned the hunt, but my sister had continued. I asked her later why she did and her answer had confused me, “Because Grandpa was having so much fun watching us.”

  Samantha had always been the first to think of another’s feelings over her own, unlike myself. The boys needed selfless right now.

  “Tell us more,” I feigned enthusiasm. It seemed to be working, the boys leaned forward and were more engaged than I’d seen them since their mother was injured.

  “Gather round,” Alexandar gestured for the boys to come closer. “These tactics are a secret and cannot be shared with everyone.”

  “Go on,” I smiled. “I have some research to do.”

  Clearing my plate, I watched as they ducked their heads in close to Alexandar and giggled. When Alexandar looked up and winked again my heart felt like it dropped to my feet while my stomach turned flips. He was so handsome despite his disheveled appearance. I smiled back at him and turned to the small kitchenette to place my plate in the sink. I noticed how clean everything was and glanced over my shoulder at the three of them huddled together. Frowning, I walked toward the library. There may be something to the faerie thing, it would explain why the staff was not seen nor heard. I decided to look it up in the library today.

  The barren walls with ambient torch light had begun to feel like home. Though it looked like it should be dank, musty and closed in, there was an inexplicable breeze that made me feel like I was just about to walk through one of the doorways to the outside. I turned into the library and ran my hands over the intricate woodwork of the archway as I passed beneath it.

  Faeries, I considered. Then tossed the idea away.

  I looked at the enormous card catalog and shook my head. I was going to try something different. If a lot of books in this library were enchanted I may be able to just ask questions and have them answered, rather than seeking them out. I picked a random set of stacks and started walking. I always enjoyed walking while I researched. It usually ended with me walking into something because my nose had been stuck in a book. However, with the advent of audio books made it easier to glean knowledge while multitasking. This felt similar, only more surgical in its information aspect. Similar to a search of an internet engine, I could walk down a stack and ask a question. In some cases I would have multiple answers back, creating an interesting cacophony of voices.

  It seemed odd that the books did not all have the same voice. They were all very unique, almost as if I were surrounded by a million people, all experts in their own field. The accessibility of information was intoxicating. It wasn’t until I stumbled upon a well-used reading area that I realized I had wandered into a part of the library I had never been yet.

  There were stacks of books and empty coffee mugs, stains on the carpet and notes everywhere. What was this place? As if in opposition, the wooden planks surrounding the little study nook sparkled in their cleanliness. It was a perfect circle of di
rt and decay. Books were caked with dust as if they’d stood in the same place for over twenty years. I stepped into the circle and it felt like there was a collective sigh of relief from the floor boards.

  Under the dirt, the table was long and made out of rich mahogany. There was only a single chair, high backed and regal in its loneliness. I pulled it out and the scraping seemed to echo through the stacks. I swear I heard the sound of wings rustling, like bats in an abandoned cave. It had a shiver running down my spine. I couldn’t put my finger on it, but this study area seemed like it had been waiting for me.

  “How did you get in there?”

  Startled, I jumped back from the table. Alexandar was standing on the other side of the clean line. The only footprints through the dust were my own. He circled the dust to face me.

  “What do you mean?” I frowned at him.

  “I mean,” he pounded on a barrier that apparently kept him from entering the circle.

  An odd electricity crackled and split the barrier like blue ice, then healed itself almost instantly.

  “Extraordinary,” I reached through the barrier that I hadn’t seen.

  Nothing happened. I touched Alexandar and felt the electrical pulse around me. I pulled him forward but I couldn’t pull him farther than the invisible barrier.

  “So very interesting,” I closed my eyes and felt with my hands for the barrier, but I couldn’t feel anything. “Hmm.”

  My eyes popped open and saw Alexandar was still directly