Red Dawn

by Bonds, J. J.

  It’s kind of hard to argue with her logic. Shaye’s great company, but I sort of miss training.

  “I’m telling you it won’t work because one of you will always end up wanting more. I’m just surprised it’s you,” she says, knitting her brows together thoughtfully. “Who’d have thought?”

  “You’re wrong,” I tell her vehemently. “I am not one of those girls who needs to label everything.”

  She rolls her eyes dismissively. Apparently I’m not very convincing.

  “It’s inevitable. At some point you’ve got to talk about boundaries, feelings, and… positions,” she says, wiggling her eyebrows in an oh-so-skeezy way.

  “Ha, ha. Very funny.”

  “Okay, so my jokes suck, but I’m right about the relationship stuff. You’ve got to withhold the sexy time until you define the relationship, otherwise it’ll never work.”

  “What are you? The Love Doctor?”

  “Yeah. And you’re the smart ass,” she replies lightly. “You know that thing getting in your way? It’s your ego.”

  Maybe Shaye does know what she’s talking about. She and Keegan have been together forever and they seem happy enough, despite the fact that they can’t even go out in public. Then again, I really don’t think I’m a DTR kind of girl. Just because it works for Shaye, doesn’t mean it would work for me. Actually, it sounds an awful lot like something she saw on one of her ridiculous shows. Really, there are days when I think reality TV is rotting her brain.

  Writing off her advice, I grab my bag and head for the door. Before I can make my hasty getaway, there’s a knock.

  “I’m not expecting anyone, are you?” I ask Shaye.

  “Nope,” she says, not meeting my gaze. “Can’t imagine who it would be.”

  I open the door to find Nik leaning against the wall outside. He must’ve come straight from the gym because he’s wearing his training gear. It’s very tight, very sexy, and… so not the point.

  “What are you doing here, Nik?”

  “I got tired of being stood up,” he tells me, smiling warmly. There’s no trace of his usual flirtiness. “Figured I’d come up here and drag you down to the gym myself if that’s what it takes.”

  “I’d like to see you try,” I counter, crossing my arms over my chest.

  “Can I come in?” he asks sheepishly. It occurs to me that Nik’s never been to my room before.

  “Why?” I ask as I move to block the door.

  “I thought maybe we could talk?”

  “Come on in,” Shaye calls from across the room. “I was just leaving anyway,” she tells me as she slips past and disappears down the hall. I get the sneaking suspicion she actually invited him up here. I’ll have to ask her later. I certainly wouldn’t put it past her.

  Nik doesn’t have to be asked twice. He strolls into the room and I close the door behind him.

  “Make yourself at home then.”

  Nik surveys the room. I can only imagine what he’s thinking as he takes in the monstrous pile of laundry littering Shaye’s side of the room. I make a point of sitting on my own bed so he doesn’t mistake the mess for mine.

  “Don’t you ladies get housekeeping service?” he asks, not bothering to suppress a smile. I can’t say I blame him.

  “Of course we do. Not that it helps much,” I return, eyeing the disaster zone. It’s code yellow today. It could be a lot worse. “But that’s not what you came here to talk about, is it?”

  “Not really,” he answers, joining me on the bed. “I thought it was time we put this whole thing behind us.”

  “Why’s that?” I ask. Not that I’m opposed to the idea, I just wonder what brought it on today. It’s been weeks after all, and so far neither of us has been willing to budge.

  “I’m in a very forgiving mood,” he tells me seductively. He traces his finger along my jawline stopping short of my bottom lip. My body shudders involuntarily at his touch. “I hate fighting with you and I want to make up,” he murmurs. Nik grabs me by the waist and slides me onto his lap so that I’m straddling his legs. We’re so close I can smell the blood on his breath. It awakens a fierce hunger within me.

  “Do I have to apologize?” I ask breathlessly. If he keeps looking at me like this, I’m not sure I could get the words out even if I wanted to.

  “That depends,” he answers, stroking my hair gently.

  “On what?”

  “On whether or not you’ll go on a real date with me this Saturday.”

  “I guess I could squeeze you in,” I tell him. “That is, assuming Pratt doesn’t yank our off campus privileges.” Pratt’s been limiting off campus trips all year as a result of the extra restrictive rules in the new handbook. But that’s not important right now. The only thing that matters right now is Nik. Banishing all thoughts of Pratt and broken rules from my mind, I press my lips to Nik’s.

  Nik responds to my kiss, holding me tight as I shift my weight to be closer to him. My blouse comes loose and his hands slide up my back, exploring, massaging. Things are really starting to heat up. So much for Shaye’s theory on withholding sexy time. Nik leaves a trail of kisses down my neck and I can’t repress the sigh that escapes my lips. I can’t imagine anything more right. My hands slip under Nik’s shirt, discovering the hard muscles of his abdomen. He trembles at my touch, a guttural growl exploding from his lips. Why would I even try to define this? Nik’s kisses are powerful. Nik’s kisses speak for themselves.

  I’m startled when he suddenly goes cold. “What is it?” I ask, disappointed that he’s stopped.

  “This is too creepy.” He lifts me from his lap and drops me on the bed next to him. Hell’s bells! I’m going to need a cool shower. “I can’t do this.”

  “What are you talking about?” I look down, inspecting myself, wondering if there’s something wrong with me.

  “That,” he says, pointing at Shaye’s stuffed animal collection. “There’s just something wrong about making out with all those things staring at me.”

  The guy has no qualms about staring down a psychotic vamp, but stuffed animals make him uncomfortable? Just. My. Luck.

  “Next time we should do this in my room,” he says, standing up gracefully. “Or anywhere else.”

  Chapter Ten

  “Where are we going?” I ask, letting impatience get the best of me. I never was good at surprises and this one is killing me. Nik’s got something up his sleeve, and judging by the smug look on his face, he’s not going to share until he’s good and ready. Typical.

  “You’ll see,” Nik says, smirking. He’s enjoying this a little too much. “I want it to be a surprise.”

  “It’ll still be a surprise if you tell me now,” I argue, hurrying to keep up as he veers off the path and into the woods. I have no idea what he’s up to, but the last time we ventured into these woods together it ended in bloodshed, so I feel justified asking for an explanation. “I’ll even look totally shocked, just for you.”

  “Promises, promises,” Nik teases. He grabs my hand and I remind myself that technically, this is a date, so maybe I should try to be a little more patient. Rumor has it there are some things worth waiting for.

  Nik and I make our way through the dense brush in comfortable silence. It’s a beautiful day. The bright rays of the afternoon sun cut through the treetops, casting shafts of light on the forest floor. The air is crisp and cool and the scent of snow is in the air, hinting that the first storm of the season might be rolling in. I have the vague feeling of recognition, like maybe I’ve been here before, but then again, there are hundreds of acres of forest and it all looks the same to me. With my sense of direction, it’s just as likely I’m imagining it.

  After a couple of miles, we break into a clearing and Nik’s secret is finally revealed. It’s so romantic that I can hardly believe what I’m seeing. Before us is a picnic, answering the age old question ‘What do two teenage vamps do on a first date?’

  I have to give Nik points for creativity. I don’t know too many
guys that would dare drag a girl into the forest in thirty degree weather on a first date. Then again, most girls can’t handle the cold like I can. Or appreciate a good hunt. What I wouldn’t give to throw caution to the wind and take down a few woodland creatures this afternoon. The idea of sinking my teeth into something warm and furry practically has me drooling. But it’s against the rules and I can’t afford any more trouble with Pratt right now.

  “What do you think?” Nik asks quietly, leading me to the blanket that’s been laid out on the frozen grass.

  “Why, Nikolai Petrov, I think that underneath that cocky air of yours, you might just be a hopeless romantic,” I muse. “Who’d have thought?”

  “Yeah, well, just don’t let it get around,” he says, giving me a half smile. I let Nik pull me down on the fluffy blanket without another word. “Besides, you haven’t even seen the best part yet.”

  “Oh?” I ask, watching curiously as he reaches for the basket in the center of the blanket. I’m hoping it’s got a quart or two of blood stashed inside. “And what would that be?”

  Nik flips the top of the basket open and reaches inside. I’m completely mortified when he pulls out a small chocolate cake topped with a single pink candle. Hell’s bells! How did he know?

  “Happy Birthday, Katia.” Nik sets the cake down between us and delves into his pocket for a lighter. I watch silently as he lights the candle. The little flame burns bright, flickering fiercely against the sharp winter breeze. “Make a wish.”

  Make a wish? Where to start? There are so many things I want, and yet I feel guilty wishing for any of them. It seems selfish. Besides, isn’t it a little childish to believe in the power of a wish? Still, it’s a sweet gesture and I don’t want to hurt Nik’s feelings, so I humor him and blow out the candle.

  “What did you wish for?” he asks, smiling impishly.

  “Can’t tell you,” I respond quickly, relying on the rules of childhood fantasy to avoid answering his question. “It won’t come true if I do.”

  “You don’t believe that,” Nik challenges as he leans back on the blanket and studies me.

  “Maybe I do,” I counter. “How did you know it was my birthday anyway?”

  “I have my sources,” Nik teases, laughing deviously. It’s hard to be annoyed when he flashes that dimple of his. Besides, it really is a sweet gesture, despite the fact that I stopped celebrating birthdays when my parents died. It just didn’t feel right without them.

  “Blaine?” I guess, rolling my eyes. I should have known. A birthday is nothing compared to all of the other dirt he’s dug up on me.

  “I thought we should celebrate,” Nik tells me solemnly. “You deserve it.”

  “I don’t know about that,” I respond, settling down on the blanket next to him. I prop myself up on my elbows and stare up at the sky above. I wonder if my parents really are watching down on me. I wonder if they’d be proud.

  “What are you thinking about?” Nik asks, sliding closer until our legs are touching. A shiver that has nothing to do with the temperature runs down my spine and I do my best to look indifferent.

  “I was just thinking what a perfect date this is turning out to be,” I tell him. It’s not that far from the truth and I don’t want to bring him down with talk of my past. Besides, I’m still not sure how he feels about the fact that I’m of mixed-blood and this doesn’t exactly seem like the time to bring it up.

  “You know, as the birthday girl, I’m pretty sure you’re entitled to one kiss for each year of your age,” Nik whispers as he pulls me close.

  “Well, then,” I respond hungrily, “I guess we’d better work on that.”

  **********

  Sitting in Anya’s office and staring down yet another goblet of blood laced with who knows what kind of vision, I find myself looking for another way to spend the next hour. Almost anything would be preferable to the contents of that glass, and as much as I hate bearing my soul, I do need to talk. Plus, Anya’s one of the few people I can actually talk with openly.

  “Anya, can we just talk today?” I ask.

  She stokes the flames burning in the marble fireplace. Anya prods the burning logs and a burst of flames leap toward the sky. Shadows dance across her face, distorting her delicate features. The crackling fire is comforting. Perhaps Anya lit it today to help me relax.

  “What did you want to talk about?” she asks, studying my face. I suspect she’s trying to determine if I’m sincere or if I’m just trying to dodge Talent Development.

  “I snuck out last week.” I blurt the truth out, bracing myself for the lecture I’m surely going to receive. Anya and I may have an atypical student-teacher relationship, but she’s still an authority figure. She’s kind of obligated to chew me out for breaking the rules.

  “Katia! You know better than that!” she reprimands me. “What were you thinking? Do you know what would happen if Pratt found out?”

  “It was no big deal,” I assure her as I fidget with my cuff bracelets. “I had to.”

  “Really? You had to?” She turns a skeptical eye on me, arching her right eyebrow as if daring me to convince her that it was necessary. “What was so important?”

  “I needed to go to Rutland. For the Angel of Hope candle lighting ceremony. I had to be there,” I tell her. “I had to be there when they prayed for the lost souls. I had to see Damian’s parents.”

  “Damian?” she asks, tilting her head in curiosity. “That was the boy who died last year?”

  “He didn’t die Anya. He was murdered,” I remind her. Anya may be open minded about a lot of things, but she’s still a pureblood and they don’t really value life the same way humans, or even mixed-blood vamps, do. “There is a difference.”

  “I know. I didn’t mean to make light of it.” She reaches for the untouched goblet in front of me and raises it to her lips. At least the blood won’t go to waste.

  “This will be their first Christmas without their son. He would have been nine,” I tell her, remembering Damian. I think of the real Damian; the one with the Spider-Man scarf and rosy cheeks, not the crazed one, warped by blood lust and shrouded in death.

  “It’s not your fault, Katia.”

  “Isn’t it though?” I ask, folding my arms across my chest. I know it’s a defensive gesture, but I don’t care. It happens to be comfortable. “I may not have killed him myself, but I led that monster here. I have to take some level of responsibility.”

  “No, you don’t,” she argues. Anya leans across the desk putting on her emphatic face. “It was Luka who murdered those people. He alone bears the blame.”

  “I’ve taken lives too,” I remind her. I haven’t gone a day without thinking about it since Aldo found me, since I learned to control the thirst. I’d give anything to take it back, but I can’t. If only there was a way to make it right.

  “Where’s this coming from?” she asks quietly. “I thought we put all of this behind us last year.”

  “Anya, you don’t kill half a dozen people and just put it behind you.”

  I move across the room to stand by the fire. I pass my hands through the flames without thinking. It hurts, but only for a second. My fingers burn bright, blossoming shiny and red, before the skin repairs itself, leaving no trace of the damage inflicted by the fire. My ability to heal instantaneously never ceases to amaze me. If only I could share this gift with the fallen.

  “Have you been dreaming of them again?” Anya asks, drumming her fingers on the desk.

  “Thankfully, no,” I tell her honestly, drawing a ragged breath. The nightmares that plagued my sleep last year nearly tore me apart. “It’s just…. I just feel so guilty. What right do I have to be so happy when others are dead and grieving as a result of my actions?”

  “Being miserable, even being dead, won’t change the past, Katia. The past is gone, forever unchanging, written in stone,” she tells me. “The future is not.”

  I’ve heard all this before. And it never gets any easier. Maybe I would have
been better off with Talent Development today.

  “You mean my future isn’t written in stone,” I reply. “Too bad Damian can’t say the same.”

  I glance at Anya and the look of pity on her face makes me sick to my stomach. I am not pitiable. I just have to be tougher. What choice do I have but to suck it up and deal? I just have to figure out how to bear the weight of my sins better.

  “You need a break,” Anya decides. “What are you doing for the holidays? Going home to see Aldo and Lissette?”

  “I wish,” I respond, returning to my chair. I notice that Anya hasn’t had the torn fabric replaced yet. “He and Lissette are travelling and doing the diplomat thing. I’m going home with Shaye to visit her family in Colorado.”

  “That sounds nice,” Anya tells me wistfully, her blue eyes glazing over. “Colorado has such wonderful skiing!”

  “Yeah, if you’re into that sort of thing.”

  Chapter Eleven

  “I never thought I’d be so happy to be sitting in one of Pratt’s inane assemblies,” I tell Nik, dropping into the empty chair on his left and propping my feet up on an empty seat.

  “You’ve got to be kidding?” He gives me a questioning look. It’s no secret that I have a zero tolerance policy for anything Pratt related. Winter break is over and the assembly is Pratt’s way of welcoming us back to Crossroads.

  “I wish I were,” I respond. “That was quite possibly the longest two weeks of my life. Shaye’s family was great, but, well, the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree.”

  “They’re all eccentrics?” Nik guesses. He smiles and I’m in heaven. It’s been two whole weeks since I’ve seen that dimple. I can’t help but smile myself.

  “You have no idea,” I say, checking to make sure Shaye isn’t within earshot. I’m extremely grateful for her family’s hospitality. It’s not like they had to invite me into their home for the holidays and I certainly didn’t have anywhere else to go. The last thing I want to do is hurt her feelings. But couple their eccentricities with Shaye being sick in bed half the time, and I am more than happy to listen to one of Pratt’s droll speeches.