by Kip Nelson
“Or we could stay.” She clapped her hands against her thighs and joined the others as the two groups merged around the fire.
They shared food and water, and while the conversation was tentative at first, they soon fell into a rhythm. After they made sure everybody knew each other’s names there was an awkward silence as each of them glanced nervously toward each other. Maggie seemed to be sizing up everybody else while nobody knew exactly what to say. So it was left to Mack to begin the conversation. He started by telling them about their experiences with Mr. Smith, how they had met Saul, and then their adventure in the mental institution. Maggie, Freddie, and Hank listened intently to the story, and when it was over Mack asked them if they had experienced something similar. They all gazed at each other for a few moments and then Maggie sighed.
“You could say that,” she began. “We came from the opposite direction. We found the road and followed it, figuring it would lead us somewhere useful. There were more of us then...for a while we didn't think anyone else survived around here. We were running out of supplies when we came across the prison. Seemed to be a good place to hole up. High fences, thick walls, and there didn't seem to be any sign of life. Some of us wanted to keep moving. They said it was too dangerous to risk meeting other people, especially the kind of people who would have been in the prison. But we were tired and hungry and thirsty.
‘Tried to believe that since we were in a new world, the old rules had gone out the window. So, we went in. Made our way through the gate, which had been broken, so we figured at least some people had broken out. At first it didn't appear as though anyone was around.” At this she leaned forward and her voice took on a more haunted tone, “but then we got to the main building. The bodies of the guards were strung up, hanging like warnings. They'd set up some kind of community, and they didn't take kindly to outsiders. We were put to work like slaves.
“Got talking to some of the prisoners, and they said that once the doors opened the guards didn't stand a chance; it was a complete bloodbath. Some people managed to escape, but most of the prisoners stayed there, although the cell doors never were shut again, and most of them preferred to sleep outside in the warm night. One night we decided enough was enough. We weren't going to stay there. There was a fight and...and we were the only ones who made it. We ran away and never looked back, and they never did come for us. I guess they didn't think we were worth chasing after.”
As she said this her voice trembled and she raised the back of her hand to her nose, trying to stifle the sadness.
“It's okay, it wasn't your fault,” Freddie said, but Maggie didn't seem to hear him.
Her eyes burned with anger as she lifted them up to face Mack. “Whatever you do, avoid that place.”
“We were going to anyway, but now we'll make doubly sure. Actually, we're on our way to the city. Where are you heading?” Mack said.
“Same place. Seemed to be the only sensible place to go. I'd rather not take my chances out here indefinitely.”
“Well, you're welcome to join us. There is safety in numbers, and we do owe you for saving us from the bear,” he suggested, smiling. Maggie quickly glanced toward her companions before she answered.
“I'll think about it and let you know in the morning,” she said.
Before they knew it, the hours had passed and twilight had set in. The fire was dwindling and the seven of them set up camp. Maggie still seemed guarded, but Mack tried to be as open as possible, and unlike their leader, Freddie and Hank were happy to chat with them. At one point, away from the others, Saul came over to Mack and asked him if he was sure that spending the night with them was a good idea. After all, Saul pointed out, Maggie had held him at gunpoint.
“These people are just like us,” Mack replied, “They've been through a lot and I can't blame her for being wary, but they helped us when they didn't have to do so. I'm sure if you asked her, she'd tell you that she killed the bear to prevent it from attacking them next, but they could have walked on without doing anything. They chose to help us, and those are the kind of people who are worth having around.”
With that they agreed upon a watch schedule and then went to sleep. Despite Mack's urge to trust them, his natural inclination to be wary took hold and he found himself staying up, straining his ears in case anyone made any suspicious movements. He had a feeling Maggie would be doing the same.
CHAPTER FOUR
IN THE MORNING, Mack made sure to awaken early, just in case there were any shenanigans. During his time in the military he had trained his mind to wake up at a certain time, but even so, he was a little surprised and disappointed to see Maggie, Hank, and Freddie packing up, ready to leave. The other three still were sleeping, and as Mack continued waking up he could hear Freddie arguing with Maggie.
“We should stay. They seem like good people, and Mack was right, it's better to be in a bigger group.”
“Because that worked out so well last time...” Maggie said in a grim tone.
“How long are you going to hold that over your head? You weren't to blame for it. You couldn't have known what was going on, and you weren't the only one who wanted to go to the prison. That's over, we have to put it behind us and look to the future.” Before Hank could add to it Mack made a noise as he was getting up, and they soon fell silent.
He greeted them with a cheery “Morning!” and seemed to ignore the fact they were packing up to leave. He pulled out an energy bar he had received from the Archer Institute and took a large bite, simply staring at the three of them for a while. They looked as though they had been caught with their hands in the cookie jar. Mack tossed his head over his shoulder and asked Maggie to join him for a word. She threw a look at her friends, who gestured for her to go with him. They walked a little way out of the camp, past the fallen bear, where they could talk by themselves. Mack stopped and turned to face her.
“Look, I get that you've been through a lot, and in this world, it's always a risk to accept new people into your social circle, but there was a reason why you saved us. I think it's because you know the same thing I do, that the only way forward in this world is to trust people. I've seen what can be accomplished when people work together, and that's what we must try. You've lost people, and we've lost people as well. That's just the nature of the world, but if we close ourselves off to new connections we're signing our own death warrants. We're both going to the city, it makes sense to go there together, don't you think?” His impassioned plea was met with a cold stare from Maggie.
“I get what you're saying, but it's not as easy as that. The more people there are the more likely it is that they'll get hurt. I'm tired of seeing people get hurt because of decisions I make.”
“I know what it's like. I'm guessing you didn't take control, but people just looked to you. That's what it was like for me. It's easy to blame ourselves, but we can't go around carrying that weight. It's not fair to them and it's not fair to us. I think you should look at this offer and think about whether you’re turning it down is because it's what's best for you or what’s best for Hank and Freddie.” His words pierced through her armor and she flinched, but her defenses went up again and she marched back to camp.
“I know what you're saying, but this is the best thing for us. We've done alright with the three of us so far, and that's the way it should stay,” she said.
Mack looked imploringly at Hank and Freddie, for they were now back at the camp. Luis, Grace, and Saul just were rousing themselves from their slumber, awakened by Maggie's sharp tone. Freddie chewed his bottom lip and looked down to the ground. His determined fire on display while he had been treating Mack's wound evidently had diminished. Hank's, however, had not. The preacher stepped forward and clasped Maggie's shoulders, looking at her directly.
“Maggie, we saw the worst of humanity in that prison and I've tried being patient with you, hoping you would return to the light by yourself. But here we have an example of the best of humanity, and we should not turn our backs
on it. If we blind ourselves to the good in the world we are not doing ourselves any favors. We owe it to everyone we lost to keep fighting and keep carrying on, and to make new friends.
“We were led here to save Mack and the others from that bear. Maybe this is how they repay the favor and save us. We should not dismiss their invitation so easily, and I, for one, wish to stay with them. We have been through a lot together, Maggie, but if you want to shut out the world I cannot be part of that. Stay with us, let us be a part of something bigger again.”
It was clear Maggie felt betrayed by his declaration, and she immediately turned to Freddie. “And what do you have to say for yourself?” In reply, Freddie inhaled deeply and stood next to Hank, displaying where his allegiance lay.
“You know it makes sense, Maggie. Save the fighting for those who actually need it,” Mack said. For a moment, he thought Maggie would argue again and storm off by herself, but the fire dimmed in her eyes and her shoulders slumped.
“Well, if everyone is agreed I guess I might as well stick around for a while,” she said, and everyone was relieved.
They stayed to share breakfast and collected their things before they left, knowing they had to make up for the time they had lost yesterday. They gave the bear one last forlorn look. It was just another casualty to the world, and it seemed like death was a hunter, stalking them all, and would strike at the least expected moment.
The weary travelers kept their weapons ready in case they came across another bear, but for the most part their journey was uneventful as they made their way through the forest. Mack's wound was aching and there was a constant sting as the weight from the pack rested upon his shoulder. He tried hiding it, but Grace, especially, could see the pain etched upon his face. However, the new additions to the group meant there were new, fertile grounds for conversation. So, they used the time to get to know each other and learn why they all were moving to the city. Mack paid attention to other things as his companions explained their motives, for he had heard them before, but he pricked up his ears up when Freddie and Hank began talking. He wanted to know as much about them as possible.
“We all were on the freeway, just going about our daily business,” Hank began, “when it happened. At first, everyone though it was just a traffic jam, and we all were honking our horns and hollering, until we realized there was a problem with everyone's cars. We got to talking, and a few of us decided to band together, while others wanted to stay with their cars in case whatever happened was fixed, and some others wanted to go in another direction. We decided the best thing to do was to head into the city. Some of us had loved ones there, others just wanted to get back to a place that was familiar. Speaking for myself, I wanted to go to a place where I could do the most good. I imagine there are many people who are in moral and spiritual distress and could use a reminder of faith.”
Then it was Freddie's turn. He was the least comfortable with the idea of speaking, and seemed to stammer or stutter every other word. “I was just heading to a conference. That moment when it happened...I still remember the sinking feeling I had. I looked around. Everyone was panicking. I tried to do my best. I should mention that I'm a counselor, but even I didn't really know what to do. In the distance, we saw a plane going down, and I couldn't help but think of all the poor souls on it, but really, we all were poor souls.” When he mentioned the plane, Grace and Mack exchanged a glance.
“Nothing was working, everyone was shouting at each other, blaming each other, blaming the government. I tried my best to calm down everyone but not many actually wanted to listen. I was used to helping people through traumatic events, but there was only so much I could do. I live in the city. I hated to think what was happening there. I know what people are like. We were just a few hundred on a freeway, imagine the amount in the city, I thought of my neighbors and my friends, my clients, all of them, and I knew that I owed it to them to get back and check on them...if they were even still alive. By the time we found the prison, I think most of us were happy to stay there for a bit, if it proved to be safe but, well, we know how that turned out,” he said. Mack noticed that Maggie stiffened.
“You mentioned you helped that settlement. Sounds like a good community. Why didn't you stay there? Seems like you had everything you needed,” Maggie asked.
Mack pressed his lips together. “In some ways, we did, but I'm looking for someone, my wife. I was...on my way back to see her when this happened. Figured if we made it to the city there might be some way to get word to her, or get back to her. Staying in one place just isn't an option for me at the moment, not until I get back home.”
“And the rest of us decided to stick with him,” Luis said chirpily. Maggie seemed to soften as she heard Mack's answer.
“And why are you going to the city?” Mack asked, as Maggie was the only one who had yet to answer.
“I'm looking for someone, too,” she said, and then increased her stride and walked forward, leaving the rest of them behind, clearly not wanting to divulge who she was seeking.
After that, they chatted between themselves as they moved deeper into the forest. Mack largely remained quiet as he preferred listening, and the pain in his shoulder still was bothering him. Freddie, Hank, and Luis mostly carried the conversation. They seemed happy enough to talk about anything, and Mack was glad the two groups seemed to be integrating so well with each other. However, Maggie still remained separate from the group, and Grace still was quiet.
Given everything that had happened Mack still hadn't had a chance to speak with Grace alone the way he wanted and it didn't seem as though he was going to get the opportunity anytime soon. Part of him wondered if he was being overprotective. She was a grown woman, after all, and it wasn't his place to assume how she felt. Maggie, on the other hand, was an interesting case. She obviously was carrying around a lot of baggage, and yet, she didn't shy away from a leadership position. She walked at the head of the line as though it was the most natural place for her to be, although Mack was used to being in command as well. Before this became a problem, he decided to address the issue, and strode forward to match her pace. He caught an irritated look in her eyes as he came up beside her.
“Were you military, too?” he asked.
“Why do you ask?”
“Just the way you walk, and you obviously were comfortable with the firearm. Good aim, too.”
“I am...I was a cop,” she said.
“That explains it. Listen, I just wanted to talk to you about a subject that may be a little delicate. Obviously, you've been used to leading your group, and I've been used to leading mine. I think we should talk about the command structure here just to prevent confusion in case we need to make a split-second decision.”
“It's okay, you can have it,” she said in a hollow voice.
“Are you sure?” Mack asked. He didn't expect her to surrender so quickly.
“Sure, there are more of your people than there are of mine. It makes sense. And, to be honest, I'll be glad to have the weight off my shoulders. You'll get no problem from me, Mack. Let's just get to the city, then we can go our separate ways.” From her tone, it was clear she didn't want to speak anymore. So Mack dropped back in with the others and they continued.
CHAPTER FIVE
AFTER WALKING for the better part of a day, the group came to rest in a small thicket of trees. They were grateful to have not encountered any other bears or other wildlife, other than what they had caught for dinner. They also had not been in the vicinity of other people either, and so far, their journey had been as uneventful as they hoped for after all they already had been through. Mack's injury still was bothering him and he was glad for the opportunity to rest and let his body focus on the healing process. At first, he went to help the others set up camp, but stopped when Freddie ordered him to sit down. It occurred to Mack that Freddie could be quite assertive when he wanted to be, and Mack found it interesting that he was only this way when he was administering treatment, not when he was tak
ing part in a discussion among equals. Maggie, Luis, Freddie, and Saul were the main ones setting up the camp. Grace was helping as well, but in a quiet moment Mack observed her pulling Hank away, and he was glad she was going to get whatever she needed off her chest.
For a long time now Grace had been feeling a weight on her soul, and seeing Billy die only had exacerbated it. She had wanted to talk to Mack about it but, somehow, she hadn't been able to bring herself to talk to him, and there had been nobody else she wanted to talk about it with, until she had spotted Hank. The fact he was a preacher in what she saw as a godless world fascinated her, and she wondered how he could hold onto his faith in the face of a post-apocalyptic world.
There were many questions residing in her soul that her own experience and rationality were not able to answer or reconcile. While she didn't know if Hank would be able to help her, she felt an inexorable pull toward him, and found herself asking for a moment of his time. She glanced back and saw Mack, and she hoped he wouldn't feel betrayed that she had gone to the preacher with her questions rather than to him. Hank and Grace walked away from the main group and stopped when they reached a thick tree. Grace leaned against it, trying to appear casual. Hank pulled up a broken log and used it as a stool. He folded his hands together in between his legs and looked at Grace expectantly.
“So, what would you like to talk about?” he said.
Grace squirmed and she felt like an idiot, wondering why she had asked Hank out here in the first place. She wrung her hands together and gazed up at the long branches, full of lush green leaves. “I'm not sure, really. I've never been a religious person. Never had the time for it, really. I had too many questions I just...ever since this happened I've been faced with a lot of different things, and I'm not sure I can make sense of all of them and, well, it's not like I can go on the internet and talk to people about them, which was my usual move, and I thought maybe, I don't know, aren't you guys supposed to be wise or something?”