Truly Madly Deeply

by Faraaz Kazi

  Rahul’s lips curved slightly on hearing that.

  “You find that funny?” Sahil asked him.

  “It would be a lot easy if you look at Professor Jeanne’s face instead of…” Rahul looked at him but did not complete his sentence.

  “Well… good, at least you find this funny,” Sahil nodded.

  “Hey, will you help me in math?” Sahil asked suddenly, remembering the way Rahul used to complete assignments for even the toughest of sums that used to bamboozle his senses.

  Rahul nodded.

  “Thanks, I owe you big for that,” Sahil said.

  “Hmm... I’ll get ready,” Rahul said and rummaged through

  the wardrobe.

  “So, what do you do the entire day lying in this ruin of a room?” Sahil asked him in good humour, seeing that Rahul was not going to talk anything interesting.

  Rahul looked at the table near the bedpost while pulling a white shirt from the wardrobe.

  “Oh, you listen to the radio? The entire day?” Sahil asked

  in disbelief.

  Rahul gave him the look again ‘Any problem?’ it seemed to say.

  “That’s great! You should,” Sahil said.

  Rahul grunted, pulling on the shirt.

  “Yesterday, all the guys of the class almost rushed out, that is after you left early of course,” Sahil informed.

  Rahul gave him a questioning look, wondering which surprise test he had missed.

  “A new girl has taken admission in the tenth grade, mid-sem. I wonder how they allowed her but when I saw her I was happy that they allowed her,” Sahil said with a dreamy look.

  Rahul looked at the clock that adorned the wall near the door.

  “Colins’ daughter, you know, pretty as hell. She used to be in Ireland earlier. You know Colins, don’t you?” Sahil asked him.

  Rahul narrowed his eyes trying to recollect that name while pulling his blue jeans over his waist.

  “He’s the grocer half a mile down south of here. His daughter doesn’t in the least look like him and neither like his wife. My bet is she must be from his first wife whom he left back in Ireland to settle here with the current hag. Some were almost saying how a thing as dreadful as Colins could produce something so beautiful… hahaha,” Sahil laughed.

  Rahul showed no interest. Apparently, Sahil was talking about the owner of a small store he had visited a couple of times to buy cigarette packets.

  “That girl Rosie who had the hots for you, remember?” Sahil asked.

  Rahul gave no look of remembrance.

  “Well, she’s currently settled with that burly Joe. I saw them making out in his car parked at the back of the school,” Sahil informed.

  Rahul laughed inside, the same girl had come to him and had asked him to come over her place in the evening. Rahul had just looked in her eyes until it had unsettled her and she had walked off calling him a ‘weirdo’.

  “That gorilla had a committed girl, you know? Kathleen, from

  the ninth grade. She was like into him, like totally crazy and in walked the bitch and the ape dumped Kathleen for her. Ha, imagine!” Sahil sighed.

  Rahul looked at him. Something stirred in the vast reservoirs of

  his past.

  “She was like broken, they say. But she has a friend named Nick in the neighbourhood. She hangs out with him. She’ll get over it eventually... I hope. Imagine walking in at your boyfriend’s place to find another girl seated on his lap, ha! Ridiculous, you will say, I know but that’s what happened and…”

  Rahul did not hear further. He felt his mind go hazy, a picture trying to form, a puzzle rearranging itself.

  “Hey, you all right?” Sahil looked at him with wide eyes.

  Rahul nodded after a brief while. He had stopped trying to push in the belt and was staring into the ceiling.

  “I have some important work to do, I’ll catch you later,” Rahul said, almost pushing Sahil out.

  “What the hell! What got into you all of a sudden? We’re supposed to visit Franklin Mall,” Sahil reminded.

  “Nothing happened. I just remembered some important work, that’s all,” Rahul said, pulling him towards the door.

  “Some favourite radio program or something? Some chick on Power 99 that you want to listen to, eh?” Sahil asked, annoyed.

  Rahul looked at him quietly in response.

  “Isn’t it rude? You make plans with me and then you ditch me,” Sahil complained.

  “We’ll go some other time and even if I didn’t come, you’re going to carry on alone, so go ahead,” Rahul said gruffly.

  “That’s not fair, you’re doing this on my birthday but still buddy, I’ll go alone,” Sahil said.

  Rahul groaned.

  “Ok, that’s not going to work this time, I know. God knows, what happened! I’ll come tomorrow, we have got to do math. Don’t forget. Bye,” Sahil waved from outside the door as Rahul subtly pushed him off.

  ‘Imagine walking in your boyfriend’s place to find another girl seated on his lap, ha!’

  Sahil’s words echoed in his mind and with each successive echo, the window in his mind opened up, the haze lifted ever so slowly that the air of recollection drifted in. He felt giddy and had to lie down completely on the bed to steady himself before the fog lifted. The memory of the events that changed his life forever overtook him.

  “I stand amid the roar

  Of a surf-tormented shore,

  And I hold within my hand

  Grains of golden sand

  How few! yet how they creep

  Through my fingers to the deep,

  While I weep – while I weep!

  O God! can I not grasp

  Them with a tighter clasp?”

  -A Dream withing a Dream, Edgar Allen Poe.

  It was a week now and Rahul sensed a ray of hope in his love life as Seema’s reactions to him completely changed. She herself came to meet him a couple of times during the break but for short periods. It brought to him the old joy of seeing her again. They would not get time to talk much with each other but no one was complaining. It was as if the passion was reignited.

  Rahul wanted to clear all the past misconceptions but was waiting for the appropriate time. Such elaborate relationship talks could not have been done in the ten minutes they found with each other, surrounded by noisy, meddling classmates. She had asked him not to call at her place as her mother was keeping a strict eye on her activities and he kept that in mind.

  One of those days Seema bumped into him near the third-floor staircase, he held her hand and pulled her back so that they would not be in the eye contact of anyone who passed by.

  “Seema, I just wanted to say sorry for…” he started.

  “Shhh!” she kept a finger over his lips. “Forget it all,” was all she said, looking into his eyes.

  “We should discuss…” he began again.

  “There’s nothing to be discussed, your sorry was enough for me. I don’t need to know why and what and bring all those things to my mind again. Just don’t repeat it, that’s all,” she said softly.

  Rahul wanted to say more but his mind was working only on the words that escaped her mouth. He kept gazing at her innocence until she blushed and ran away, turning to look at him one final time before she disappeared into her class. He felt a sweetly poisoned arrow, pierce his heart again and again when she did that.

  ***

  “So you and Seema are on again?” one of Rahul’s classmates asked him the next day in the school compound while they were going down for physical training.

  “Huh?” Rahul looked at him. The guy was Praveen, a part of the rival group and his sudden interest in Rahul’s life did not

  help matters.

  “Why do you need to know?” Rahul asked, arrogantly.

  “Just…” he said before trotting ahead, “…got my answer,” he completed to himself, before winking at a tall spectacled boy standing in the corner, watching the proceedings.

  Th
e next day, Seema asked Rahul to wait for her after school in the class itself. The corridor and classrooms were deserted and Seema came as soon as her classmates took leave. She looked at him for a while before speaking.

  “I’ve my unit exams coming up, we won’t be able to meet regularly or talk daily, I hope you understand,” Seema informed.

  “We hardly meet even now, not once have we gone out since ages,” Rahul complained, trying to make her see his side of the coin.

  “Ah, we’ll go soon Rahul, you know exams are something very important for me and I need to concentrate on the task at hand. Once exams are over, ma wouldn’t take me to task for whiling away time. Exams make me crazy,” Seema replied.

  “And me?” Rahul asked back with a sly smile playing on his lips, forgetting the topic they were arguing on.

  Seema looked into his eyes and looked away quickly, controlling her smile.

  “It’s ok. I will keep myself busy, Dorothy ma’am wanted me to participate in the inter-house dance competition. For a week or so, I will practice with the others,” Rahul maintained.

  “Ok, good luck. By the way, when is the dance competition?” Seema asked.

  “In the next week a couple of days after your exams are over,”

  Rahul informed.

  “No one’s even informed me. That means people from my class will hardly get any time to practice,” Seema lamented.

  “Oh, people from your class have you and I know what you can do with your moves. I am proof enough; see I have lost my senses after witnessing your killer moves on the annual day,” Rahul teased.

  “You and your dialogues!” she laughed and he looked at the way she slowly giggled, with her hand carefully placed on her mouth, trying to stifle the laughter.

  “Hey…” she said pushing his face aside, “…don’t look at me

  like that!”

  “Why?” he asked.

  “Something happens,” she replied casting her gaze down.

  “What?” he asked.

  “I don’t know,” she answered.

  Rahul smiled.

  “When are you meeting the others for practice?” she asked.

  “Well, I was told they meet at the auditorium every evening around four,” Rahul informed.

  “And who exactly are these ‘they’?” she questioned.

  “Hmmm, I’m yet to find out,” Rahul said.

  “Are you still angry at me?” Seema asked suddenly.

  “And why should I be?” Rahul said, with a smile.

  “For that telephone incident,” Seema said apologetically.

  “I’m past anger now since I have you,” Rahul said, tickling her behind the ear.

  “Don’t say such things, you’re really a flirt,” Seema said.

  “What? Can’t I even say what I feel? Is that always flirting?” Rahul asked with a frown.

  “Hehe, yup it is. Now, don’t start questioning back. I’m getting late,” Seema said ruffling his hair playfully.

  “Right princess,” Rahul said.

  “Hmmm… ok, I’ll move then. Tuition classes have been scheduled early so we get extra time to revise,” Seema told him, “…and hey, no visits there, ok?”

  Rahul nodded.

  “Can I at least accompany you halfway?” Rahul asked.

  “Rahul! No, it’s risky. My aunt comes to drop my cousin in the primary, for all I know she might still be waiting down,”

  Seema guessed.

  “Ok,” Rahul said in a dull voice.

  “I will give you a call a night before my exams start, ok?” she tried to cheer him up.

  He nodded.

  Rahul waited for five minutes before following her footsteps.

  ***

  That evening, when he came to the school auditorium, he could hear the music from a distance. He was surprised to see only three people on the stage.

  “Hey, we’ve got company,” the tall spectacled boy got up to add an additional chair to the linear arrangement. Rahul was not that pleased to see him.

  “Hi Jay, you and dance?” Rahul sounded amused, climbing onto the stage.

  “Well, time to get out of books for the time being!” Jay, the head boy replied casually. The other two also got up from their chairs to greet him.

  After blaming him for their house’s loss in the quiz competition, Jay had kept his distance from Rahul post the cricket and

  debate victories. Rahul was glad for that as he could not stand

  his classmate, but facing him again brought bitter memories of

  the past.

  “Hey Rahul, how have you been? We hardly get time to interact these days,” the fair, lanky girl said as she shook hands with him.

  “Hi Nazia. Yeah, it’s a pity!” Rahul acknowledged.

  The other girl just stood there waiting for Rahul to acknowledge her presence. Finally, when he did not do so, Nazia, the head girl stepped in.

  “Hey, meet Farha. You might have seen her before!” she said.

  Oh, so this was the girl the guys in his class were drooling over as they realised their chances with Seema. He remembered the reactions of some of his classmates on hearing her name. She was surely competing with Seema in terms of beauty in the brains of the school’s guys and for some even in their bathrooms. People used to comment that she looked a lot like film star, Kareena Kapoor and though Rahul tried to segregate the differences between the two, in the one glimpse that he took of her, he saw truth in those words.

  Farha indeed was beautiful and looked a lot like the popular Bollywood diva of whom he was a huge fan. She had a slim, wild beauty about her that could captivate the opposite sex. Her figure was arresting and regal, her hips tapered into shapely thighs and the suggestion of nubile curves under her sleeveless black velvet dress spelt heat in the growth of teenage anatomies.

  “She is in Seema’s class,” Jay added, breaking his thoughts.

  Rahul glared at him but did not utter the words that almost came to his lips.

  “Farha Siddiqui,” she shook hands with him, eyeing him with arresting black eyes.

  “Rahul… Rahul will do,” he said with half a smile.

  He could not help but notice how soft her skin was and how her touch sent a shock-wave down his spine. He quickly removed his hand and put it in his trousers’ pocket.

  “So we are done now! We have our two couples,” Jay said.

  “Two couples?” Rahul asked, plainly surprised.

  “Yes, others won’t participate, so it would just be the four of us from the Blue house,” Jay informed.

  “What do you mean? I will get the others to participate, there are some very good dancers in our house,” Rahul said.

  “I had made an announcement and I got no response from anyone,” Jay broke the news.

  “You announced it? You are forgetting house announcements are my job!” Rahul was about to blow off his lid.

  “Yes, I know but you were busy with other things, so we thought it better not to disturb you,” Jay said, not caring to meet his eyes.

  “What the…” Rahul took a step towards him.

  “Rahul, chill down, relax. No one was bothered about it, everyone is like ‘It is almost the end of the year, the boards will be up soon’, so it’s upto us to do it for our house now. Don’t forget that we almost have the house-cup in our grip. In fact, Jay was the one who told Dorothy ma’am that you dance really well and she thought of including you in the dance team, which I think is a brilliant idea. Farha here has exams in a couple of days but still she’s ready to participate, though she won’t be coming for practice regularly,” Nazia said.

  Rahul rolled his eyes but did not say anything.

  “Ok then, let’s start. Rahul, you rehearse with Farha and I will do so with Nazia and before going we’ll check our steps together,”

  Jay suggested.

  Jay and Nazia went to one corner of the stage, while Rahul accompanied Seema’s classmate to the other. Jay started the system and the music blazed on.
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  Rahul took the chair, while Farha displayed the basic steps to the soft number playing on the music system. She looked at him, while doing the steps. Rahul concentrated on her feet movements. She appeared to be a great dancer.

  “Have you learnt classical?” Rahul asked her unexpectedly.

  “Well yes, I’ve been learning it for two years now,” she replied.

  “Yeah, it shows!” Rahul complemented her moves.

  “Thanks!” she said.

  Rahul picked up the steps from her and she corrected him when he did it wrong. He noticed the way she held him near his hips while correcting his feet movements and how tightly she held his hands when they did a step together. When she moved to his right, through the gap between her sleeve rim and her milky skin, he could see a narrow black strap on her shoulder. He quickly shook his head and severely admonished his wandering thoughts.

  “Concentrate, dear!” Farha said softly.

  “Hey, we’ll join you guys after grabbing a quick cup of coffee from the canteen,” Nazia shouted at them from the other end.

  “Ok, carry on!” Rahul and Farha both shouted back together.

  They too decided to take a break and went backstage and sat down on the marble floor.

  “God, I’m tired!” Farha complained, holding her head in her hands.

  “Yeah, that’s what dancing continuously does to you,”

  Rahul smiled.

  The only sounds that came in the auditorium were the creaking noises of the revolving rusty fan. They talked for a while of things and people in school.

  “Heard you and Seema are back together?” Farha asked him, when he caught her looking at him, while he was looking elsewhere.

  He was taken unawares by the arrival of that statement in their peaceful conversation until now.

  “Huh? Who told you?” Rahul fired back.

  “Everyone says so!” Farha replied.

  “Everyone is dumb!” Rahul replied, taking care of the past experiences and Seema’s tacit warnings to him. She would not like it if he were to repeat the same mistakes over again.

  “So, you’re still single?” Farha asked him, her voice dropping a little, sounding huskier.

  “Kind of!” Rahul replied after a while, looking at the ground.

  “Even I’m single!” Farha exclaimed, as if both of them being single in common was paramount to her joy.