Where I Found My Heart

by Hansen, C. E.

He took my breath away. He pulled my tank top over my head, as well as my bra, and stuck his finger into the remaining salad again before smearing it across my breasts. Then lowered his mouth and licked and sucked at my covered nipples as he slowly tortured me with the gentle movement of his hips.

  I grabbed the edges of the counter and my head rolled back against the wooden doors of the cabinet as I panted like a wild animal. I slowly opened my eyes and found him staring at me, smiling.

  “Reny, this is amazing.” He held up his fingers, “You are amazing.”

  He slowly pulled out of me and looked at me longingly. I was about to pull him by his hair back into position, but he had other ideas. He took those two fingers and plunged them once again into the same crescent shaped smashed bowl and lightly drew his fingers along my pubic bone before lowering himself to the floor where he kneeled on a cushion of cooked potatoes before me. The heat from his tongue ran up my inner thigh and he licked at the seasoned mayonnaise above my mound. His fingers slowly, decadently slid over my clit and his tongue followed suit.

  “Mmmm. My God Reny I love the way you taste.”

  I was so unprepared for what was happening all I could do was moan.

  He licked and licked until I dug my fingers into his shoulders and screamed out in pleasure.

  “Told you it tasted good.” He chuckled.

  “Dylan…” My voice faded.

  He stood and entered me again. His rocking motion brought me to a new level of satisfaction and I literally screamed. He pumped faster before he stopped and pulsed inside me. A look of euphoria on his face, the same as the one I’m sure was on mine.

  “Reny, that was the best tasting potato salad you ever made.”

  I tossed my head back and laughed, then brought my mouth to his and licked the remnants off his face.

  “You know, I think your right.” I smiled sheepishly, “and since we are expecting company any minute now, I think we should get this mess cleaned up and get changed.”

  “The hell with them, we won’t answer the door.” He took my face between his hands and kissed me deep and hard and I felt my body react.

  The rest of the afternoon, into the evening, my eyes followed him as he moved through the clusters of our guests. I watched his face for each and every smile. There were times I’d catch him looking at me and he’d shake his head and laugh when he saw I blushed, but, all in all, it was a great day, and that was the best, damned potato salad I ever made.

  Chapter 15

  The next morning I got up, took a shower, got dressed and made a small pot of coffee. Libby bought me a Keurig for Christmas last year, but I really don’t like the way the coffee tastes. It tastes like coffee that has been pressure-cooked. It’s good when I’m in a big rush, but there is something to be said for fresh brewed coffee.

  I finished my cup and before I left, rinsed it and the spoon then left them in the dish drainer.

  I grabbed my satchel, slung it over my shoulder and headed out the door. I was half way to work when I realized I’d left the lunch I made the night before. I got a little creative and made a small batch of potato salad and a ham and swiss on rye, extra mustard. So what, I had a yen for potato salad.

  “Oh well, I know what I’m having for dinner tonight.” I sighed.

  I pulled my car into the same spot I parked everyday and opened my trunk. I walked around the back to retrieve my work bucket then lowered it to the ground. It had all my gardening tools all neatly stored in their respective places. Looking up at the sky I could see we would definitely get rain tonight.

  Need to leave the hothouse roofs open.

  I reached in and grabbed my new garden gloves I’d bought from the nursery yesterday. They called out to me, so to speak. Or I liked them, either way they were mine now.

  I heard a car pull into the gravel lot and turned around to see Libby arriving. She opened the passenger window and yelled out. “I’ve got Coffee Shack and donuts.”

  “The coffee I’ll take.”

  I picked up my bucket and walked over to where she parked. She was getting out of her car when I got there. She pulled out the tray holding the four cups of coffee and the box of donuts and looked over my head, her smile widening with each passing second.

  “Libby, why are you acting so weird.”

  Turning around I saw a dark blue car pull in. Normally, this would not even concern me, but it was 6:30 in the morning and the Nursery wasn’t open for business yet. And then there was that crazy smile on Libby’s face.

  “Libby, who is that?”

  “A visitor.” She said matter of factly.

  “Someone you know…” The words no sooner left my mouth when I saw who was behind the wheel of the dark blue sedan. “Mark.”

  “Close your mouth, your gonna catch flies like that.”

  I closed my mouth. Then opened it again, “Where…how?”

  “I guess you can say we bumped into each other at the Coffee Shack.” She was trying as hard as she could not to laugh.

  He stepped out of the car and walked towards where we both stood; Libby with a smile on her face, me not so much.

  “Stalk much?”

  “Seems I remember you asking me that once before.”

  “Well, you followed Libby here. That is definitely stalking.”

  “No. She invited me. That’s called being polite.”

  “Well, I’ve got work to do.” I picked up my bucket and walked away.

  “At least you can here me out.”

  “I think I got the message loud and clear.”

  “I’m pretty sure you got the wrong message.”

  “You stood me up. That is the message I got.”

  “I didn’t. I had car trouble. I called a cab, but the time I got there you had already left.”

  By the look on Libby’s face, it was obvious that this little tête-à-tête was very entertaining to her. I scowled at her.

  “At least let the guy explain.” She defended him.

  “Fine.”

  Both sets of eyes turned to him.

  “Like I said, my car wouldn’t start. I was frantic knowing you’d be waiting. I went right in and called a cab, but when I got there…no Reny.”

  “Did you expect me to wait there indefinitely?”

  “Of course not. But since you wouldn’t give me your phone number there was no way of contacting you.” His cobalt blues were staring right at me and I found myself at a loss for words. Then he smiled and I nearly cried. “I contacted every Reny McAdams I found on the internet, which I’ll admit there were only two, One in Illinois and the other Portland, Oregon. Figured they weren’t you. I even searched just ‘McAdams’. There were far more of those, but none of them were you, or even knew you for that matter.”

  “Oh.”

  “So what does a determined man do?”

  He stopped talking but his eyes were relentless, and so was that smile.

  “What?” I mumbled.

  “Tell her.” That was Libby. She looked at me and waved her hand in the air, “I already heard this part…but I like it.”

  I looked back in his direction but looked at his chin, refusing to look at those eyes. My body was already feeling kind of odd.

  “I made it a habit to stop by the Coffee Shack punctually at 9:45 every morning. I’d buy my coffee and sit while I waited, hoping you’d walk in that door.” He smiled sheepishly. I looked at him as though he was mad.

  “I’m sure they thought you were a very loyal customer.”

  “I didn’t care what they thought, I stayed until 10: 30 then I’d go to work.”

  “You must have a very forgiving boss.”

  “Oh, he’s forgiving…to a certain extent.”

  Okay already, stop with the megawatt smile. You’re killing me here.

  “I um…” I didn’t know what to do next. It’s been a while since I’ve had a conversation with a man I was attracted to, even if I wasn’t willing to admit that just yet. “Well, that seems excessive.”


  He laughed and my legs wobbled. A weak wobble. I put the bucket down and tried to stand still while maintaining my haughty attitude. Not easy.

  “I figured if you can shop in my grocery store, I can have coffee in your Coffee Shack.”

  “It’s not my Coffee Shack. That one is out of my way now, I go to the one on Main Street.” I said crossing my arms over my chest, satisfied the control was back in my court. “It still seems a litle excessive.”

  “I told you, I’m very interested in getting to know you. So how about we do this the right way.” He pulled his cell phone out of his pocket, “why don’t you give me your phone number so I can call you and ask you out for lunch, or something.”

  I stared at him. Refusing to say a word.

  “Reny?” Libby turned towards me and then made a funny face, “it’s 913-354-5543.”

  He quickly typed that number into his cell and I turned to look at Libby, my eyes narrowing. Oh, she got the message, but she didn’t care. She smiled at me like an idiot.

  “Well, I’ve got to go get ready to open, I’ll see you soon…I hope.” She said to Mark. Then she turned in my direction. “I’ll talk to you later.”

  “Oh, we’ll talk alright. Yup.”

  She picked up the coffee and donuts and disappeared inside. I knew her all too well. I would bet my life she was watching from somewhere.

  “Don’t be mad at Libby. I kind of left her no choice.”

  “Yeah, I bet.”

  “Seems we’re on the wrong foot again.”

  “You really stopped there every morning?”

  “If I’m anything, it’s persistent.”

  “I’ll say.” I managed a weak smile, “I don’t get why.”

  “I take it you have no mirrors in your home?”

  “Of course I have mirrors.” I blushed. Like…a lot. I’m sure a beet has nothing on me right about now.

  “Reny, you are a beautiful woman, and there’s something, not sure I could put my finger on it, but there’s something about you that pulls at me.”

  “Now you’re sounding like a stalker again.”

  “Well, we can easily remedy that. Have lunch with me and once you get to know me, you’ll know for a fact I’m not a stalker. Just a guy who is attracted to a beautiful woman.”

  I looked down at my feet and laughed. I hadn’t realized one of my pant legs were cuffed and the other not. I looked ridiculous.

  “Yeah, I didn’t want to say anything. Besides, it’s cute.”

  “Cute?”

  “Yeah.”

  “Okay.”

  “Okay what?”

  “Okay I’ll have lunch with you.”

  He smiled triumphantly.

  “I knew it would pay off.”

  “What would?”

  “Stalking you.” He smiled. “I’ve got your number, and I will be calling you shortly.”

  I laughed nervously.

  “Of that I am sure.” I picked my bucket up. “But I really need to get to work.”

  “I’ve got to get to work myself. Don’t want the boss angry with me.”

  He waved, kind of dorky-like, and walked back to his car.

  I grinned. I kind of liked grinning. I turned toward the greenhouses and the butterflies swarmed in all at once. I felt ridiculous, somewhat like a little kid, all giddy and silly.

  I had just gotten inside Greenhouse Two when my phone rang. I lifted it out of the bucket and looked down at the caller ID. I didn’t recognize the number but I answered anyway.

  “Hello.”

  “So are you free today?”

  I smiled and smothered an outburst, a giggle of sorts, into my hand.

  “I’m surprised you waited this long…stalker.” I tried using my stern voice, but I’m sure he could hear I wasn’t serious. I was happy he wasn’t able to see me bouncing like a loon in my garden clogs. “How about tomorrow? I will wear something a little more appropriate.” I looked down at my overalls and smiled again at the one leg up, one leg down thing.

  “I have a better idea.” He said. Damn, his voice was, I don’t know, sexy?

  “What’s that?”

  “How about I pick you up tonight, say seven-ish, and we’ll go out for dinner instead?”

  “Um…I…”

  “Come on, it’s just lunch at a later time.”

  “I guess that would be okay. That would be okay.”

  There was a small silence.

  “You do realize you’ll have to give me your address, right?”

  “Stalker.” I laughed, “It’s 6014 Dogwood Lane, Apartment 416.”

  “Thank you. I’ll see you at 7:00.”

  “Stalker.”

  I heard him laugh as I pushed end. That voice will be the end of me…and that smile…and those eyes.

  “Dylan…what do I do here?” I said to the heavens.

  “You go out and have a nice time.”

  I spun around to find Libby standing in the doorway.

  “How long you been standing there creeper?”

  “Long enough to know you finally found your senses.”

  “Oh, Libby.” I panicked, “I have nothing to wear for dinner. I mean. I haven’t shopped for…well, forever.”

  “No problem. That’s why you have me. We’ll go to Neiman’s lunchtime. We’ll find you something really pretty there.”

  When she noticed I was shaking she stepped closer and hugged me. “Don’t worry, I’ll help you get ready. I’ll even stay at your house till you get home. We’ll have us a good old fashioned girl’s sleepover.”

  I smiled. “Thank you Libs.” I’m sure my relief showed in my eyes.

  “That’s what family does for each other. Besides, I’ll want to hear every detail when you get home.”

  “I see. You have an ulterior motive.”

  “I do.” She hugged me and for the first time in a long time, I was that nervous young girl going on her first date.

  Chapter 16

  Libby and I went to Neiman Marcus at the mall for lunch and didn’t stop until we found a dress that fit the bill, a dark red dress, which complemented both my figure and my blonde hair. I also found a pair of black pumps I could walk in, although I wasn’t sure how long I could walk in them, but I would find out soon. A small black purse and some new makeup completed my shopping trip and as I carried my shopping bags back to the car, I had a glimmer of hope for the future.

  Instead of going back to work, Libby and I stopped at Josh’s and her apartment so Libby could get a few things. Then took the items we purchased and went right to my apartment, where Libby opened a bottle of wine she’d brought and poured us both a glass. And as promised she helped me get ready, through every stage.

  After she was finished with my hair, which she curled and left long down my back, she set about putting on my makeup. The wine helped calm my nerves, sort of held the butterflies at bay a little. I walked into the bedroom, sat on the edge of the bed and pulled my thigh highs up, then lowered my dress over my head reveling in the feel of it sliding down my body. I hadn’t had a reason to get dressed up for some time, and to say I was nervous would be an understatement. I bent over and slipped my new shoes onto my feet.

  When I walked back into the living room where Libby was putting my lipstick, keys and cardholder into my new purse, she looked up and the shock that registered on her face nearly caused me to crumble.

  “What, what’s wrong?”

  “Nothing is wrong. You look absolutely beautiful! Oh Reny…” Tears flooded her eyes and I could see she tried to blink them away. “I’d almost forgotten how beautiful you are…seeing you like this…it makes my heart feel good. You know?” She had her hand over her chest for emphasis.

  “Why are you sad?”

  I walked up to her. She led me by the hand to the bedroom and opened my closet door where the full-length mirror was mounted on the inside of my closet door and guided me up to it before turning me around to face it.

  “Oh my…”
/>   “God.” She finished my sentence. “You are stunning Reny. Look at you. And these are tears of joy, I was so afraid I’d never see you like this ag…” she stopped herself, but I knew what she would say.

  I looked up and down the length of my body at least twice. It was definitely weird. It was as if someone else was staring back at me, someone not me. For a few seconds it frightened me, I shuddered.

  “Come with me.” She led me back outside and poured me a half a glass more. “Drink this. It’ll calm you down.”

  I did as she suggested and leaned on the stool.

  Libby walked determinably over to the door and picked up her overnight bag removing her pj’s, “Old fashioned girl’s sleepover.” Then she reached in and removed a small pouch. She unzipped it and held up a necklace. It was one I’d recognized right away. It was the one Dylan and I gave her for her twenty-fifth birthday. I loved that necklace, which is the reason we bought it for her.

  “Here.” She stepped over and pushed my hair to the side as she fastened it, then she walked around to the front of me and smiled. “Perfect. It’ll be your something borrowed.”

  I laughed, “I’m not getting married Libs.” My eyes filled up. I think she was contagious.

  “I know, but…” She wiped her eyes, “Oh don’t you start. You’ll smear your makeup.”

  I looked up at the ceiling. It was something my mother told me to do ‘when you didn’t want to cry’. It never worked before, but it seemed to help now.

  “Thank you for everything Libby. And your necklace…well, it’s just beautiful.”

  “Go reapply your lipstick, he’ll be here any minute.” She looked at her watch.

  “That’s if he doesn’t have car trouble.” I said snidely over my shoulder.

  “Oh, that won’t stop him again. I’m sure he’d make sure he gets here no matter what.”

  Just as soon as she finished her sentence the doorbell rang.

  “Go, go fix your lips.” She shooed me away and I hurried into the bathroom carrying the small purse as Libby answered the door.

  “Hello Libby.”

  “Hi Mark. Reny will be right out.”

  He stepped inside and I heard Libby shut the door.