The Invader Candidate: From the Adventures of Khraa-Veh, Alien Explorer

by Don Cook

  The bum answered, “Kevin,” and coughed falsely. “Gore,” he coughed falsely twice. “Ballard,” he coughed three times. “Of no fixed address.” Ballard the bum contemptuously faked four more laughing coughs.

  Callahan and Reed were satisfied with the bum’s name as being authentic, but were angered by his saying it while mock-coughing.

  “Well, you told me to cough up my real name!” Ballard said, with arrogant, nonchalance, “So I did!”

  Ballard coughed out a disrespectful “shave-and-a-haircut-two-bits” fake coughing spell.

  “Now unless you’re in real need of a doctor, Ballard, CUT THE COUGHS!” Callahan shouted. “We’ve got enough video evidence and several reliable eyewitness accounts to lock your sicko ass up until well after Captain Picard from Star Trek starts collecting an old age pension from Starfleet! So, since we’ve got you good, Ballard, why did you want to rape Ms. Downey?”

  Ballard stalled, before he realized the jig was indeed up, and shouted angrily, “OKAY! I CONFESS!”

  Seeing that the evidence was piled Mount Everest-high against him, he shouted, “I WANTED HER AS MY OWN PIECE OF —!”

  Ballard froze physically and verbally over the course of one split-nanosecond, as he subliminally heard Mephistula’s voice in his already deranged mind, as she inexplicably scolded him via telepathy, Operative BS-281, you have failed in your mission to terminate Astra Downey!

  Ballard’s mind pleaded, But Mistress —!

  Mephistula’s voice snarled within Ballard’s mind, Goodbye, Operative BS-281.

  Once the split-nanosecond psych-chat ended, Ballard suddenly fell to the floor in a scary four-second screaming-mad fit, before Ballard went unconscious — and died.

  Callahan knelt down, checked Ballard’s pulse, put her head to Ballard’s chest, and found him lifeless.

  “Don’t ask me why or how,” Callahan said, angrily baffled, “but Ballard’s dead.”

  HOME OF MALLORY STANTON

  WASHINGTON, DC

  SAME MOMENT (9:04 PM EASTERN TIME)

  “There!” Stanton said, as she was enjoying a late macaroni-and-cheese dinner with wine in her posh Washington home at the exact second Ballard died. Right on the heels of Ballard’s demise, she felt a fearful, inexplicable shaking chill and nausea throughout her entire body, one that she tried to find an explanation for, even if it meant that she had to lie to herself.

  Stanton, using wit to compensate for ignorance, said, “That does it! No more mac-and-cheese for me!”

  APARTMENT 1214, BELLA VILLA APARTMENT COMPLEX

  MINNEAPOLIS, MINNESOTA, USA

  SAME MOMENT (8:04 PM CENTRAL TIME)

  Khraa/Astra, seated on her couch, shivered and felt nauseous as she saw a vision of Ballard’s death at the precise moment Stanton had hers, and knew that this was the work of none other than Mephistula.

  Khraa/Astra realized that another survival-log entry was in order. She turned on her comcorder as she picked up a bottle of pop from the coffee table.

  “Survival Log, supplement to previous entry. Captain Khraa-Veh ven-Elheem recording. Shortly after my arrival on Earth, I had undergone a few, rather ‘interesting’ experiences. Firstly, on a light yet significant note, here’s one for the beings in Sociological Objects Studies.”

  Khraa/Astra took a quick sip of soda pop, and sat it back on the coffee table.

  “Hmmm… Since my arrival on Earth, I have discovered a kind of beverage completely unknown to our so-called Known Universe, but one that is quite common on this planet. It is a heavily-flavored drink unhealthily laden with sugar, and is also made with carbonated water. After consuming a hand-held bottle of this alien drink — which Earthlings call soda pop, or simply pop — I can say authoritatively that our vast Known Universal intergalactic civilization, with its quadrillions of languages, dialects, cultures, subcultures and all its combined cultural and technical wealth, has absolutely nothing like this fizzy pop drink. I found it quite ticklish, and giggled quietly yet uncontrollably for a few moments. Our spacefaring worlds carbonated liquids for millennia, but no world has ever applied such carbonation to drinkables. I find this interestingly… Well, odd.

  “On the darker side, I was violently assaulted by a homeless derelict man that Earthers would call a ‘bum.’ If it were not for local and national police authorities, as well as a passerby with a small camera built into his smartphone, I would not be recording this supplemental entry. Instead, I would either be lying in one of Earth’s hospitals — or dead, stuffed in an impersonal drawer in a holding-chamber for Earth’s criminally or accidentally slain known by the fittingly morbid-sounding name ‘morgue.’

  “But thankfully, the law-knights and the previously-mentioned stranger with a com-camera caught my attacker and charged him with a variety of offences connected with the assault. One of the law-knights was Mike Bonhoeffer, of the United States’ Federal Bureau of Investigation, a man with whom I became romantically smitten upon first sight.

  “This incident with that street derelict proved the following:

  “(Alph) Terran humans and our Known Universe’s humankind are indeed descended from Adam and Aevaa, or as these people call them, Adam and Eve, and;

  “(Bett) The incident proves that there are both good and evil human beings here on this planet, for any civilization that not only has evildoers but also ways of dealing with them and people who uphold what is right shows that some scrap of decency can be found in such a culture.

  “However, this does not end with the arrest and detention of the felon in question. In a world where many on this planet have been both frightened and lulled by skewed media factual reports and entertainment that reports and depicts lies that are all-too deftly garnished with some truth, my encountering real, genuinely decent types like Mike is a relief on a planet with escalating violence, corruption, lawlessness with or without political leaders, and perversion of precious truth by both various spirit-faith-based and secular voices.

  “During my self-induced power-nap, I had a vision-dream where my would-be attacker was interrogated by local law-knights. I saw that the felon had died of an inexplicable fatal seizure, one that could only be telepathically-induced from a great distance. This leads me to conclude that Mephistula is here on this planet. I’m certain of it. But who is she at present? End of entry, date-time stamp — subjective timing.”

  Khraa/Astra paused, overwhelmed at what might be happening. “Yes, Mephistula… Whose form have you taken on, my arch-villainess? Where, and who, in Perditia are you?!”

  Chapter 4

  EXODUS KANNATIKA

  It was dark shades of the QLO [Quallique-kannatikien Liberation Organization] Crisis that occurred back when I was eight years old, when Pot-Trudierre’s Father, the (wrongly) iconic Quallique-Kannatikan Pietreaux-Trudierre, was Kannatika’s Minister-In-Chief.

  The elder Trudierre, in response to kidnappings of key people in the Quallique-Provincial, Kannatikan national, and Tarsonic governments by the QLO, invoked the War-Law Act. Hundreds of thousands of persons — some QLO sympathizers, many simply being anti-Trudierre Kannatikans (half of the dissenters being from within his own Liberalist Party ranks) — were arrested and held without trial, which was normally in contradiction with the Kannatikan Crime Law-Code. Yet, under the War-Law Act, this was legally permissible to the Kannatikan federal government despite being unlawful to any provincial government.

  The War-Law Act was repealed in 1917 [Neo-Universal Era] and replaced by the less totalitarian and more flexible Emergency-Law Act. It was assumed that under this law, with its four levels of emergency and appropriate actions available to the Federal government, would still allow for the existence and respect of at least basic civil liberties and human rights in Kannatika in future crises.

  But a few decades later, the iconic Trudierre’s son Pot went on a similar legalized purge, with an Order-In-Monarch’s-Council (later found to be illegally drafted) that allowed for Alph) the incorporation of the old War-Law Act a
s Level 5 of the Emergency-Law Act, Bett) its instant invocation upon its taking effect, Gamm) the murder of thousands of innocents, and Delt) the arrest, detention and trial on falsified charges of treason and indefinite detention of 3 million “unstables” [dissidents] by Trudierre’s forces without trial or sentencing. All this for the sake of justifying the totalitarian purging of any and all foundations of the once-democratic star-realm of Kannatika.

  Upon learning of Pot-Trudierre’s actions, I recalled both the QLO Crisis and Terran baseball legend Yogi Berra’s famous quote, “It’s like déjà vu all over again.”

  Dr. Khraa-Veh ven-Bonhoeffer

  Admiral, Platinum-Class, AMKEXPRA (Ret’d)

  Shades of the QLO Crisis: How Pot-Trudierre Murdered Kannatikan Democracy in One Night*

  [EXCERPTS FROM MINISTER-IN-CHIEF POT-TRUDIERRE’S

  INVOCATION OF THE REVISED EMERGENCY-LAW ACT

  27 OCTOBER (EARTH-TIME)]

  “My fellow Kannatikans,” short, dark-haired Kannatikan Minister-In-Chief Pot-Trudierre lied with a straight face into the video camera, cleverly masking his vile intentions, “I am speaking to you at a moment of dire national crisis, when violent, fanatical beings seek to put asunder the peaceable star-league that is Kannatika. One tactic utilized by these mad beings is the threat made against the very lives of innocent people. To remedy this, allow me to reassure you, the people of Kannatika, with the Government’s plans to deal with them.

  “What has happened on City-Planet Moraellonne over the past 14 standard-days, and all across our entire star-realm, has, sadly, much historical precedent. It has happened elsewhere in the Known Universe on several recent occasions. Yet Kannatikans, relying on our nation’s history as a guide, have always assumed the ‘It-can-never-happen-here’ attitude, and as such, we are doubly shocked that it has.

  “This common assumption among us, though naive, is understandable. It is all-too understandable because peace, order and good government have flourished in Kannatika for decade after decade. Yet despite these conditions and/or because of them, we have witnessed, via the words and actions of a puny minority of misguided souls, just how fragile our society can be if we are not prepared to defend our dominion, and just how vulnerable to blackmail tolerant, compassionate, principled people are...”

  Trudierre rambled dishonestly for scores of moments to the Kannatikan people before he stated, “The government of Kannatika has been told by self-styled so-called ‘freedom-fighters’ that they intend to, in their words, ‘do what it takes, come Perditia or cosmic omni-nova’ unless their insane demands are met. These freedom-fighters claim they are acting to end government corruption and social injustice in the best interests of Kannatikan democracy. But I ask you, all of you, do they truly speak for the citizenry of Kannatika — or merely a heinously-guided, unlawfully mad-minded minority?

  “Every government everywhere is fully aware of their deep, important social problems. And every government, to the best of its abilities, is deeply committed to their solution. Not by kidnappings, bombings, or other terrorist acts, but by work — hard work, purely and simply.”

  “And just who are these beings who claim to be latter-day patriots and martyrs?” Trudierre rambled on dishonestly in his invocation of national martial law. “Nothing short of convicted murderers, masters of manslaughter, terrorist bombers, armed robbers and worse. You name the law, they’ve broken it.

  “Yet we are told incessantly that these persons have been unjustly treated, imprisoned due to their political opinions, and that they deserve to be freed immediately, without recourse, by due process of law. Such responsibility of deciding whether to release even one of these criminals solely rests with the federal government, according to the rule of law. To bow to the demands of these dissenters would be not only an abdication of that responsibility, it would be absolutely treasonable to Kannatika!

  “If any society is to continue to exist,” Trudierre continued, “it must be able to root out the traitorous cancers of armed revolution that are Perditia-bent on destroying the very basis of our star-realm. Therefore, after careful analysis of the facts in consultation with all levels of Kannatikan Government, I decided to reinstate and incorporate the former War-Law Act as the fifth level of the Emergency-Law Act, and immediately invoke the revised Emergency-Law Act’s Level Five to bring the full weight of government quickly to bear on all those persons advocating or practicing treasonous acts against the Kannatikan Dominion.

  “I do so reluctantly,” Trudierre lied connivingly and convincingly into the camera, “completely aware that invocation of the new Level Five of the Emergency-Law Act, like the old, original War-Law Act once implemented by my father during the QLO Crisis, confers sweeping powers to the government, and suspends the Kannatikan Law of Rights. After it became quartz clear that the situation required extraordinary action, I saw that it was, while unpleasant, still necessary to employ such drastic measures.”

  “I sense the fear that grips many Kannatikans today” Trudierre said dishonestly near the end of his declaration of martial law. “Certain among you are understandably upset. Let me reassure you that the authorities have the situation well in hand. Everything that needs to be done is being done; all levels of government in our star-realm are well prepared to act in your interests. Thank you.”

  VALLEX [into camera, Mike Wallace-style]: Where does Dr. Velbya-Koyne, frontier medicine and telepathy management pioneer, and humanitarian activist call home?

  Born and raised in the Gorkeldic Republic, Koyne, a devout Omniunical, fled the ethno-religious violence between Tuskanics and Hagkeldics as a teenster to Kannatika. She studied at Oxmidia University, and moved to planet Albaskoba, where she became a top-rated pediatrician and child telepathy management therapist. Her most famous client and protégée was famed scientist-explorer Dr. Khraa-Veh ven-Bonhoeffer. She later joined the Kannatikan Exploration and Research Commission.

  As Veh reached adulthood, Koyne relocated back to Oxmidia as her domicile-planet where she alternated between her part-time health professorship at Oxmidia University and her primary work in telepathic pediatrics. Yet, by Divinity or chance, Drs. Koyne and Veh always served on the same KERC missions.

  Then, shortly after the devastating Shrion attack on Rubiaar IV, Dr. Koyne was officially disgraced and discredited as a health doctor by the Trudierre regime for alleged “health reasons.” Again, Koyne fled where the place she called home — this time to Amkeria, where she met and eventually love-bonded with AMKEXPRA Admiral Patt-Makarrth.

  In a recent interview for 40 Moments, we tried to learn from Dr. Velbya-Koyne ven-Makarrth: Is she simply “Forever A Refugee?”

  Excerpt from 40 Moments: “Forever A Refugee?”

  Interview with Dr. Velbya-Koyne ven-Makarrth

  By Myak-Vallex, Interviewer/News-Scribe*

  BLESSED BENDIKTA FAITH-TEMPLE, PLANET OKTAAVAEON, SKANDARIO PROVINCE, KANNATIKA (LIGHT-EONS FROM EARTH)

  28 OCTOBER (EARTH-TIME)

  “Khraa-Veh always proudly called Kannatika home” eulogized Trudierre, cleverly cloaking his disdain for Khraa/Astra with serpentine deftness.

  He paused during his obligatory Minister-In-Chief’s eulogy at Khraa/Astra’s hastily planned funeral that had more of the makings of a Soviet-era Russian payment of final respects (complete with a garishly floral-framed huge black-and-white blowup of Khraa/Astra’s KERC military photo that literally blocked out the godly altar) than a deity-reverent funeral in a free society like Kannatika once was — until Trudierre declared pan-national total martial law and seized absolute totalitarian control of the vast multi-stellar dominion 24 hours after the raids on Rubiaar IV and numerous other worlds.

  Trudierre, still deftly feigning choked-up emotionalism, continued, “Kannatika — indeed, the entire Known Universe — has lost a legendary woman, the likes of whom infinity will never witness again. It is sad that her death was caused by…” Trudierre paused briefly, before he went on dishonestly, “…a misunderstanding between h
er Expedition’s Defense Forces and the visiting Shrion Delegation —”

  “THERE WAS NO MISUNDERSTANDING!” Velbya shrilly screamed in hysterical tears as she stood up. Her outburst forced up gasps of shocked disbelief from mourners who had come from all over the Known Universe (mostly being foreign heads of state and/or government, leaders in the fields of science, education, business, finance, entertainment, and spiritual groups, as well as numerous simple common-beings) because Velbya spoke the “unspeakable truth.”

  (In truth, Trudierre had lied that Mephistula had nothing to do with the attack on Rubiaar IV. The lies about “the Rubiaar IV incident” were backed by a Platinum-Alph-1 Level news-scribe blackout — the highest level possible for the already oft-secretive Kannatikan Government —with the Trudierre regime stating officially that the blackout would be in place “pending further official investigative inquiry.”)

  “IT WAS AN ALL-OUT ATTACK ON THOUSANDS AND THOUSANDS OF INNOCENTS!” Velbya continued to scream. “KHRAAVIE AND HER DEAR LOVE-LORD ISOKK, YESHVAH REST ISOKK’S SOUL, BRAVELY LED THE FIGHT AGAINST THE SHRION ATTACKERS AND DESTROYED ALL BUT ONE OF THEM! YOU KNOW WHO I MEAN, MY FELLOW KANNATIKANS AND THOSE OF OTHER REALMS! MEPHISTULA!”

  The mourners gasped again in terror, as Trudierre smiled falsely to put up a brave youthfully arrogant front while Velbya shrilly ranted further, “That’s right! Mephistula! I don’t know who slept at the controls, but I suspect the 12-6 Invasions were an inside job!

  “Someone…” Velbya paused, while she eyed Trudierre with stern accusation, then spoke with an accusatory shrill attitude, “Someone allowed — yes, allowed — for the 12-6 Raids on many, many Kannatikan worlds! I name no names, but if your ethics, hearts, minds and souls are true, you know where the blame falls!” Velbya concluded in shrill cynicism, “Goodbye, one and all!”

  Velbya gave a mock Nazi-style salute as she shrilly shouted with all contempt at Trudierre, “AND HAIL TRUDIERRE, OCCUPATION-MARSHALL OF THE IMPERIAL SHRION PROVINCE OF KANNATIKA!”