Western Dilemma

by Janelle Daniels

  Several cheers rang through the crowd again.

  “We know it’s not always the easiest to come forward to ask for things you need. Especially when you might not feel completely secure in your job. We understand that. Which is why we decided that I should work amongst you, to hear your concerns as an equal and not as your employer. Because of that, the changes we’ve been able to make thus far have happened. We can’t thank you enough.”

  He glanced back to Emery, hoping she understood. But all she did was stand there, her arms wrapped around her middle as if holding herself together.

  He lowered his head slightly. “This might not have been the most honest approach, but I hope you can forgive us for the deception. Our intentions were good, and excellent benefits came out of it.” A genuine smile curved his lips. “And I must say I’ve come to a greater appreciation for what you do day in and day out. It’s been a pleasure working with you.”

  The men cheered and laughed at that, and Everett shook his head. “I want you to know that I’ll be announcing even more changes. I promise you that this will be one of the safest mines in the world.”

  Everyone cheered loudly, clapping and hooting their pleasure. With just this one speech, the men’s morale skyrocketed. They were excited to work there again, and they were no longer living in fear.

  It was exactly what he and his partners had hoped for. Everything had paid off.

  And there’d only been one thing sacrificed in the process.

  As men came to the platform to shake his hand and thank him, he watched as Emery quietly retreated to the tent.

  He swallowed hard. He knew the upcoming conversation wouldn’t be easy, but if there was any chance of mending things between them, it had to be done now.

  He did what was necessary with the announcement and interacting with the men, but he extricated himself as quickly as possible.

  Just as he finally made it out of the crowd, Lucas caught his attention, and Everett detoured toward him quickly. “I’m sorry, I can’t talk right now.”

  Lucas nodded and glanced toward the medical tent. “I saw her arrive. I’m sorry,” Lucas said.

  “Thank you.”

  “Let me know if there’s anything I can do.”

  Everett nodded. “I will,” he said, shaking Lucas’ hand.

  If anyone else called after him, he ignored them, his steps determined as he made his way to the tent.

  He didn’t bother announcing himself, knowing Emery would be expecting him. He opened the flap and stepped in, watching as she gathered her papers. “What are you doing?” he calmly asked.

  She didn’t turn toward him. “I’m gathering my things to take them to the clinic.”

  “Why?” he asked, but he already knew the answer.

  She continued gathering the papers until they sat in one neat stack. “Because I won’t be working from this location any longer. You can tell your partners I’ll still work for the company, doing check-ups, but the workers will have to come to the clinic from now on.”

  “That won’t be a problem.” He wanted to reach for her, to take her into his arms. But he didn’t have the right to do that. He’d hurt her. “I need to explain some things.”

  As if his words had set off a bomb, she whirled toward him, her curls arcing with the movement. “Explain some things? You mean like how you lied to me from the beginning? How you let me believe you were just another worker here?” She shook her head bitterly. “Just thinking of all the times I talked about the Copper Kings and what they were doing, how you let me go on and on and make a fool of myself. It makes me sick, Dr. Clarke.”

  He winced. “I didn’t mean to humiliate you.”

  “Well you did! But that isn’t the worst of it.” She pressed her lips together as if she were trying to keep her emotions in check.

  “I know. I handled this all wrong. I should have come right out and told you who I was when I woke up.”

  She nodded, her expression mutinous. “Yes. You should have. Why didn’t you? Why lie about it? If you’d asked me to keep it a secret because of what you were trying to accomplish here, I would have.”

  “I know that. I’ve never doubted your integrity.”

  “Then why? Why lie?”

  He blew out a long breath. “You were so furious at the Copper Kings you wouldn’t have believed anything I said if you knew I was one of them.”

  “And so you said nothing? How does that make things any better?”

  “It didn’t. It didn’t make anything better. And I knew that. But I also wasn’t at liberty to tell you anything. My partners and I had an agreement. I was going to tell you right after I left the clinic, though. I even spoke with Lucas about it.”

  She crossed her arms. “Then why didn’t you?”

  He raked a hand through his hair, knowing he didn’t have a good excuse. “After, when I knew I’d started to care for you, I realized that for the first time in my life I had the opportunity to know that someone returned my feelings because of who I am. Not what I have.” He shook his head. “I know there’s no excuse for lying, but realizing you were developing feelings for me—not my money—was too much of a temptation to pass on.”

  She lowered her eyes. “I can understand why you’d want that. Truly.” She looked at him then. “But that doesn’t make it all right. It doesn’t make it acceptable or make it hurt any less. You had plenty of time to tell me. We’ve had countless drives together and time both in the clinic and here.” She shook her head. “This wasn’t just a one-time thing. You decided to keep the charade going, to deceive me. How am I supposed to feel about that?”

  Unable to withhold himself from her a moment longer, he walked over, taking her hands in his. “It’s not right. I’m not trying to excuse my behavior in any way. I was wrong, completely and utterly, and I beg your forgiveness. I admire everything about you. You’re good and kind and intelligent and unlike any other woman I’ve ever met in my life. I’ve made a mess of things, there’s no denying that, but I also can’t deny how I feel for you.”

  She shook her head, and as if she couldn’t bear the feel of him, she removed her hands and stepped back. He closed his hands into fists before lowering them. His heart ached. No matter what she said, he knew she’d already pulled away from him.

  She swallowed hard. “I understand your reasons for keeping the truth from me. I even forgive you for them.” She paused, but before he could begin to hope, she added, “But I can’t do this anymore. You’ve broken my trust. You lied to me. I don’t see how we can move forward from this to have a future. What good is a future without trust? I’m not certain I can ever trust you again.”

  “You can. You can trust me. I swear I’ll never do anything like this ever again.”

  She shook her head, pain reflecting in her eyes. “I want to believe that, but I just don’t know. I don’t know what to do. I don’t know how to react. I need time.”

  Her pain sliced through him, and he knew he was the cause of it. He wanted to argue with her, to beg her to believe him, but those were things he wanted. They wouldn’t help her. They would only hurt her more.

  So instead of doing what he wanted, he nodded slowly. “I understand. Take all the time you need. But know I’m not leaving town. I’m staying, and I hope that after things settle down, you can forgive me.”

  “I don’t know if I can ever move forward from this,” she admitted softly.

  “I know.” He knew that, but he still wouldn’t give up.

  He wanted to tell her that he loved her, that he wanted a life with her. But again, it would only add pressure and cause her more pain. This wasn’t about him or how much he was hurting. Thinking of himself was what had gotten him into this mess in the first place. “If you need anything, send for me.”

  She gathered her things. “I will,” she said, moving around him and walking out of the tent.

  He exited after her, watching as she made her way to her horse. She stowed her items, mounted quickly, and rode of
f.

  Never once glancing behind her.

  Chapter 11

  Emery rode blind, the tears streaming from her eyes obscuring all vision. She knew she was headed in the right direction for home, and she trusted her horse to get her there.

  Everett had lied to her. It was the only thought which continuously ran through her mind. Everything she’d thought, everything she’d felt, had been a lie. She felt hurt, foolish, and like her heart was broken.

  Who knew a person could physically hurt so much and yet have no outward injuries? How did someone heal from this? Move on?

  Her world had been tossed upside down, and she didn’t know what to do or where to go.

  All she had left was the clinic—a place where every room reminded her of Everett.

  She sobbed, slumping over her horse. She would heal from this. She had to.

  She’d gone from the highest of highs to the lowest of lows, ready to tell him she loved him and wanted a life with him, to crashing down into a mass of broken limbs.

  He’d wanted her forgiveness, and she’d been honest with him. She understood his reasons for not telling her the truth. But how could she ever trust him again? How could they build a life together on lies?

  And he was a Copper King! How would that ever work? Her life was at the clinic, working to better other people’s lives. He might be a doctor, and, in a way, that could work out, but that wasn’t what he did for his profession. He’d chosen something else over that.

  He’d never want to stay here and make a life in a small, backward town. And she would never fit into his world, even if she wanted to. They were too mismatched to share a life together. It would never work.

  But she knew he’d never accept that, never accept they were too different.

  After the longest ride of her life, she finally made it home, her horse stopping docilely in front of the house as if she knew Emery couldn’t handle one more thing.

  She dismounted in a heap, slightly amazed she remained on her feet, and stumbled through the front door.

  Voices abruptly ceased, and Emery realized everyone was at home. Even Abby, Lily, and Charlotte were visiting.

  They would ask what was wrong, ask her to explain what had happened. And she couldn’t yet. In truth, she’d never felt so lost, so out of control. Her world had shattered around her, and she couldn’t make any sense of it yet.

  For someone so used to being in control and always having a plan, this was a nightmare.

  She walked past the opening to the parlor, foolishly hoping they wouldn’t notice her.

  “Emery?” Hannah followed after her down the hall to the stairs. And when Emery didn’t stop, Hannah jogged up to her, placing a hand on her shoulder. “Emery, stop!”

  Emery didn’t turn toward her friend. “I need to go to my room.”

  Hannah must’ve heard something in her voice, and she whirled Emery around to face her. Her face fell. “Emery, what’s happened?”

  And just like that, the lock on her feelings broke.

  For the first time in her life, Emery cried in front of another person. Squeezing her eyes shut, she couldn’t hold back the tears any longer.

  Hannah wrapped her arms around Emery, her movements awkward. Even though it was obvious Hannah had never comforted someone like this before, Emery appreciated it.

  Footsteps sounded behind her, but she didn’t look up to see who it was. More hands reached out, giving her silent support.

  After a few moments, she allowed the other women to lead her back into the parlor.

  Forcing her emotions down, she sniffled, wiped her eyes, and looked up at the other women as they all took their seats. “I’m sorry. I’m not usually so emotional, as you know.”

  Abby’s eyes were sad. “You don’t need to apologize. How can we help you?”

  Emery wondered what to say to them. Should she tell them the truth and put it all out there? Should she hide it, pretend like it never happened and try to get over it? She didn’t know what was best, wasn’t certain which would make her feel better.

  But with the other women in front of her, looking at her with such affection and worry, she realized she wanted to share the burden with them. “I met someone.”

  Before anyone else could say anything, Hannah’s mouth dropped open. “Did something happen with Everett?”

  “You could say that.”

  Grace sat next to her, her normally bubbly personality dimmed from the circumstances. “What happened?”

  Emery let out a breath, realizing she needed to discuss more than just what had happened today. “You all remember the cave-in from a few weeks ago, and how I looked after a man?” When they all nodded, she continued, “His name is Everett. He was a supervisor at the mine, working to improve their safety practices. Recently, I found out he’s really Dr. Everett Clarke, one of the Copper Kings.”

  “Oh dear.” Lily looked at her with pity. She worked in the mining office and was married to Chase. She would’ve known Everett was more than just a supervisor from the beginning. “I had no idea you two had gotten close.”

  Not knowing what else to do, she interlocked her fingers. “I fought it while I cared for him. But even then, there was a pull between us, something I couldn’t ignore. I came to know him in that time but refused to act on it,” she said, trying to make them understand.

  They all nodded encouragingly at her, and part of her was relieved they hadn’t judged her.

  She let out a shaky breath. “While he was in the clinic, I spoke unfavorably about the Copper Kings, saying how they weren’t taking care of their workers. And from everything I’d seen up to that point, I genuinely believed that. The conditions were harsh, there were barely any safety measures to speak of, tunnel disease was running rampant, and they’d just had a cave-in and then a fire. Everett insisted things were changing, but I wouldn’t believe him.”

  Hannah frowned. “Was that the problem?”

  “No.” Emery wished that was all. “Because of what he was trying to accomplish at the mine, he kept his identity hidden from me. He was going to tell me after that, but he realized for the first time that someone who didn’t know who he was was developing feelings for him.”

  Hannah spoke quietly. “And he decided not to tell you so you’d fall in love with him and not his money.” It wasn’t a question. “It was wrong what he did, but you have to understand. Where we come from, a person never knows whether they’re liked for who they are or for what they have.”

  Emery understood completely. “I know why he did it, and I understand it. But things went too far. Things progressed so quickly, and the time to tell me the truth came and went. And I found out in the worst possible way.”

  Lily’s brows raised. “You mean he didn’t tell you?”

  Emery held up her hands. “No. I decided to visit him at the mine today to tell him of my feelings.” She scoffed, shaking her head at her own foolishness. “To tell him I was in love with him.”

  Lily’s hand went to her mouth. “The announcement? That’s how you found out?”

  Emery only nodded.

  Fury crossed her friend’s features. “How could he do that?”

  “I keep wondering what would have happened had I not gone there. Would he have come to me after and told me?”

  Lily’s hand cut through the air. “That doesn’t matter. He should’ve told you well before now.”

  At her friend’s fierce defense, Emery chuckled, but there wasn’t much humor in it. “I said the same to him.”

  Charlotte got her attention. “What did he say after? Did he try to defend himself?”

  “He apologized. He regretted what happened. He never meant for things to turn out how they did, and I know that’s true. But how can I be with him after this? How can I trust him again? He lied to me about who he was. I feel like I don’t even know him.”

  Abby looked at her with sad eyes. “I’m sorry this happened. I’m sorry things didn’t work out better. What do you want to happen
?”

  Emery had wondered the same thing. She wished this never would have happened in the first place. She wished he’d told her immediately, that she’d known he was a Copper King from the start. She didn’t know how that might’ve changed things, how their relationship might’ve progressed, but at least the foundation would’ve been built on the truth.

  “I don’t know.”

  “And you don’t have to know. You don’t have to decide now,” Hannah said, coming to her defense. “It doesn’t matter what he wants or what anyone wants but you. You take all the time you need deciding how you feel and what you want. No one has the right to pressure you.”

  Emery smiled at her. For so long Hannah had felt like an enemy, but now, Emery truly saw her as an ally. “Thank you.” She blew out a breath. “I need time to think about this. To sort through my feelings. A few days to take stock of my life and see what I want.”

  Her friends nodded in understanding, and Grace spoke up. “If you’d like to take a few days away from the clinic, I could stay there and send word to you if there’s an emergency.”

  Emery shook her head, not wanting to run away from the one thing she’d wanted her whole life. “No. I can still work at the clinic.” At least, she thought so. “Everything is so confusing right now.”

  Abby, their mother hen, stepped forward and took her hand, helping her rise to her feet. “Let me take you to your room and get you settled. I can bring up a tray for you, if you’d like. But you might want to just rest.”

  Thankful, Emery nodded, and the other women gave her support and love as she left the room with Abby.

  They quietly walked up the stairs to Emery’s room, and before Abby left, she turned back, her hand still on the doorknob. “I haven’t been through what you’ve experienced today. But I have experienced heartache. I want you to know it will get better. Things will get easier regardless of what you choose. We’re all here to support you through this, to help you with whatever you need. All you need to do is reach out for us, and we’ll be there.”