My mother squeezed Me around the waist. “Good to know that’s not lingering over your relationship like a dark cloud. I know how you feel about the trust, but I have no regrets. I wanted my boys well cared for. But enough about that. She’s got you talking about marriage, huh? Oh sweetie, you’ve got it bad.”
I laughed. “I do, Mom. I’m in deep.”
“Does she know how you feel about her?”
“No. Well, yes and no. I haven’t told her that I love her but she knows that I care about her. My lack of telling her I love her has been a point of contention in our relationship. We actually had a bit of a blowup before coming over tonight.”
“The woman picks up her life to move in with you and you haven’t told her you love her? She must really have faith in you. You’re my son, but that’s questionable behavior, Richard. I’d haul ass if a guy I had moved in with hadn’t told me he loved me.”
“she does have faith in Me, and it humbles Me that she trusts Me so much, Mom. I don’t know what I’m waiting on. I keep telling Myself that I’m waiting for the right time, but is there really such a thing as the right time? I guess I’ve just been scared to pull the trigger, but there’s no reason for Me to continue to wait.” As much as I didn’t like having this conversation with My mother, it helped Me realize a few things. “I think it’s about time I stepped up to the plate. Thanks for helping Me confront some thoughts I’ve been avoiding. I’ll tell micah how I feel tonight when we’re back at the condo.”
“Some words of advice, sweetheart: If you can’t see your life without her, if she’s your first and your last thought and you’d be lost without her, that’s as strong a feeling as any. Don’t waste another minute not letting her know.”
“Thanks, Mom, I appreciate the advice. I’m pretty rusty with this laying-My-feelings-on-the-line thing.”
“Don’t let your past hinder your future with Micah. If she’s the one your heart beats for, tell her.”
After I kissed My mom on her forehead and gave her a bear hug to end all hugs, I helped bring the dessert plates and coffee mugs out to the dining room and rejoined the rest of the family. There would be pumpkin pie and lovemaking in My immediate future. I was going to show My pretty girl how much I cared for her.
micah
Dinner with Rick’s family was just the distraction i needed.
i was still angry, but the more time i spent with my Master’s family, the more at ease i became. Conversation was warm and engaging. Dinner was delicious. Lena was a fabulous cook; i probably gained at least five pounds in one sitting.
Throughout dinner, my Master linked our hands together under the table. This gesture only intensified my anger. We were in front of His family, so i put on an Oscar-worthy performance. Every time i’d look to Him for answers, He simply smiled at me. i didn’t want to smile—i was angry, damnit. Whenever He focused those baby blues on me, though, i couldn’t help but return His smile. His bright eyes, combined with His grin, were my Kryptonite. Well, aside from the occasional ill-timed orgasm.
Seeing Rick’s baby pictures and hearing stories about what my Sir was like as a kid induced much-needed chuckles. He was clearly embarrassed, but He took it all in stride, albeit with a flushed face.
i enjoyed getting to know my Master’s family. They were lovely, kind, and fun. His father was such a flirt, which i found to be comical. Looking at my Master’s dad was a clear indicator that He’d grow to be even more handsome as age settled in.
Overall, His family was very warm and welcoming, and His nephews were hilarious. Spending time with them reminded me of how much i missed my family. i’d see them for Christmas, but i longed for a hug from my mom. There was nothing like a mama’s love.
Based on our phone conversations, my parents were anxious to meet Rick. Of course, they wanted to meet the Guy i had been living with the past few months. What parents wouldn’t? my father had a ton of questions, and in not so many words, threatened to beat Rick’s ass if He hurt his baby.
Being the youngest sometimes meant an overprotective father and brother hovering every time a guy showed interest in me. In my Master’s case, because things had ended awkwardly with Brent, my dad and brother wouldn’t show Him mercy. i assured my daddy that Rick was good to me, but he wouldn’t be satisfied until he could lay eyes on Him.
i had to mentally amend that last part of my previous statement. my Master had been good to me but we weren’t in a good place, at least not on my end. He asked for time, but i wasn’t particularly interested in giving it to Him.
When i had spoken to my parents about my relationship with Rick, they stated our racial difference didn’t bother them, much, but of course my dad wished that i would end up with an upstanding black man.
you can’t help whom you fall for.
i’ve dated all sorts of men, it just so happened that the last two men i’d been in relationships with were white. Just thinking of my dad sitting Rick down to give Him “the talk” had me on edge, and i still had a few weeks left until our voyage . . . if my Master still opted to go.
i wasn’t sure what our future held at this stage.
Just as i was thinking of all the awful questions my brother, Darren, and our dad would toss at Rick, i was brought back to the moment at hand by my Master leaning into the cab and calling my name.
The door attendant named Stephen opened the vestibule door, ushering us inside our apartment building and out of the light late-November snow.
“Paul off for the holiday, I take it?” my Master inquired as we stepped into the lobby.
“Yes, Doctor Thomas. He and his wife went to visit their kids in Minnesota for the holiday.”
“That’s nice, sounds like a fun plan. Sorry you’re working tonight, Stephen, but I hope you’re able to salvage your Thanksgiving.”
“Thank you, Doctor Thomas, I will try my best. You and Ms. Foster please do the same.”
i smiled at Stephen and wished him a Happy Thanksgiving before my Master escorted me to the elevators, His hand resting at the small of my back. He pressed the button, and the doors parted, allowing me to enter. He followed closely behind, then pressed the button for our floor. His sparkling eyes quickly met my gaze as the doors closed.
Leaning against the elevator panels, He asked, “Glad to be home?”
“Yes, Sir,” i replied, staring down at my heels. i didn’t want to look at Him. It was difficult to be angry when He looked at me with such adoration.
“Did you enjoy yourself, micah?”
“i did, Master. Thank You for the evening.”
“It was a pleasure to have you escort Me to dinner. My family seems to be taken with you, My mother especially.”
“i enjoyed her as well. Everyone was very kind, Sir,” i replied quietly.
Despite the wonderful time we had at dinner, there was still an elephant in the room. i couldn’t just give Him time. i was experiencing an eerie sense of déjà vu.
Earlier in our relationship, my Master said that our busy work schedules could put distance between us and He didn’t want that to occur, so He asked that i move in with Him. We’d been living together for a some time now, and although there were still some scheduling issues, i didn’t fully attribute our lack of penetrative sex to our schedules.
We’d done everything else, so i couldn’t understand what the problem was. At first, i figured that the sexual distance might be due to the hours we kept, but since we were still having oral sex, that theory went out the window.
i’d been on the Pill for some time, but He was content with cunnilingus. It had never gotten anyone pregnant.
i just didn’t understand. Why ask me to move in? Why did He say He wanted access to me at all times if He wasn’t going to fully take advantage? Was this Brent Part Two?
The elevator chimed and the doors parted. Rick allowed me to exit the elevator ahead of Him. i stepped out into the hall and waited for my Master to lead the way to our apartment. He unlocked the door and ushered me into our d
welling.
Once i entered, i kneeled and awaited further instructions. Despite my simmering anger, i would not break protocol.
He whispered softly as He closed and locked the door behind Him, “micah, stand up.”
i did what i had been trained to do. Every day, i greeted my Master this way. For the life of me, i couldn’t understand why He didn’t want me to present this way now. Was He also upset about earlier?
Nervousness and paranoia started to settle in as i rose to my feet.
my Master must have noticed my uneasiness, but instead of a look of sympathy, He scrutinized me. So He was still upset . . .
“Give Me your coat.”
i removed my coat and handed it to Him as requested.
He hung up both our coats and quietly closed the closet door. When He was finished, He leaned against the door, simply staring at me.
i quickly dropped my gaze and kept my eyes trained on the floor. It was the safest thing for me to do.
If i looked at Him, i was sure my resolve would break. The sight of His face was too much. my Master slowly made His way toward me, gently tilting my chin upward so that i was forced to look at Him.
“I need to ask: Were you being completely truthful when you said you enjoyed yourself tonight?”
i nodded. He stood so close, so incredibly close, and creased His brows together at my lack of verbal response.
“i’m sorry, Sir. To answer Your question, yes, i was being truthful. Tonight was wonderful and Your family is great. i really enjoyed meeting Your parents. Everyone made me feel very welcome, but Your mom went the extra mile and i appreciate it. No pun intended, but i was a bundle of nerves, especially after the egg was activated.”
“I’m glad you had a good time. As for the egg, it was an amazing experience to watch you cum without anyone the wiser. you made My dick hard. It was difficult for Me to maintain My composure as well. you’re very sexy in the moment just before you’re about to release.”
i hated that He was talking about being turned on. i hated that He said i was sexy just before i came. i didn’t want to hear any of this, so i stood before Him lightly brushing my hands over my dress as a distraction. i didn’t want to focus on what He just said.
If i focused too intently on His words i’d become flustered. Even when angry, He always had that effect on me.
“i’m glad You were entertained and aroused, Master. i really did make an effort to try to withstand the pleasure.”
“My imagination isn’t exactly reliable tonight. How about you help Me out, micah? Tell Me, just how wet are your panties?”
Shit.
“Uh . . . um. i’m not sure how to answer that, Sir,” i replied, glancing away.
“Well,” He said, “I know you may still be upset with Me, but your pussy adores Me. Since you’re at a loss for words and My imagination is unreliable, give Me your panties, micah.”
i continued to avert my eyes as i removed my underwear to oblige His request. i placed my saturated undergarment into His outstretched hand.
He sniffed them.
“micah, you drive Me crazy, so fucking crazy, pretty girl.”
He placed my panties into His pants pocket before grasping my face in His hands.
i found it hard to believe that He would continue with our evening as if there wasn’t an issue. i didn’t like the way i felt. i was hurt, and dinner only temporarily took the focus off that pain.
“micah, look at Me, please.”
i did as instructed and looked up to meet His gaze as a single tear fell from my eye. i couldn’t hold it in any longer. i tried, but i just couldn’t do it anymore.
He wiped away my tear with the pad of His thumb. “I know you’re upset with Me and you’re hurting. I see it. I feel it.
“I feel your hurt, pretty girl, and I want to make it better. I swear to you I’m going to make it better. Tonight, may we do something different, micah?”
i wasn’t sure where He was going with this, but i nodded before softly replying, “Yes. Yes we can, Sir.”
“For the rest of the evening, no more formalities. You’re Micah and I’m Rick. There are no titles, no roles, it’s just you and me. You’ve been vulnerable throughout our entire relationship by submitting to me, and I’m going to even the playing field. You deserve my full loyalty as well.”
I wasn’t sure how to respond to what he just said, but the tears came faster. I didn’t want to cry but I couldn’t help it. Damn tears.
“I-I’m not sure I understand what you mean, Si—Rick,” I managed to say.
“Micah? Would you please do me the honor of stripping bare and meeting me in the playroom in five minutes?” He asked, releasing me from his grasp.
I was confused. What was going on, and why did he want me to call him “Rick”? What did he mean by “even the playing field” and “full loyalty”? I had so many questions but no answers.
“Please, do this for me, Micah? Know that you’ve done nothing wrong; as a matter of fact, you’ve done everything right. Five minutes in the playroom, pretty girl? I promise to explain it all.”
For now, I would oblige his request until we were in the playroom.
“Five minutes,” I whispered as I turned and made my way to our bedroom to slip out of my clothing.
I don’t think I’d ever heard such kindness and softness from Rick. I wondered what the change was attributed to. In the span of a few moments, he seemed different.
“Oh, and Micah?”
“Yes . . . Rick?” I replied, looking over my shoulder.
“Remove your egg.”
* * *
I stood naked, admiring the snowfall through the panoramic windows. Despite the chaos below, the snow created a peaceful, picturesque scene, which was the polar opposite of what I was feeling at the moment. I leaned forward against the glass paneling, my nipples hardening on contact.
I think I felt his presence before I actually heard him enter the room. He approached me from behind, pressing his muscled frame against my back. His heat immediately warmed my body. He nuzzled against my neck and roamed his hands over my breasts and along my midsection. He began a sensuous assault that started with light nibbling on my ear and ended with his hand wrapped around my throat as he planted slow and deliberate kisses along my shoulders.
A moan escaped my mouth as I leaned back into his embrace.
When he turned me around to face him and our gazes finally met, I could detect something different in his eyes. I hadn’t the slightest clue what exactly was different, but I felt it.
Without an exchange of words, he took hold of my waist and leaned down to kiss me. Our tongues met, and it was as if we were kissing for the very first time. It was tentative but telling. He was fully taking over all of my senses—so much so, I forgot to breathe. Asthma be damned. Everything about his kiss and his touch was different.
Rick was very deliberate with the gentle strokes of his tongue. His tongue moved with mine in perfect sync as he alternated between suckling my bottom lip and delivering sweet pecks to my face. It was a tender, soul-wrenching, curl-your-toes kind of kiss.
“Rick,” i moaned. It felt unusual, hearing his name roll off my tongue.
He halted the kiss and took a deep breath, rubbing his forehead against mine. Despite the dimness of the room, when I looked up to meet his eyes, they shone brightly. The color had taken on a slightly lighter blue than I was used to seeing. I stood fascinated.
“Micah, I love you,” He whispered.
I shook my head. This wasn’t real.
I was pretty sure a gasp escaped my lips. I was hearing things. There was no way Rick said what I thought he’d said. “W-what?”
“I love you.”
I was stunned into silence, still trying to figure out what was happening.
When I didn’t respond, he hesitated a moment before continuing with his declaration. “I think on some level I knew I loved you the moment I laid eyes on you. It was the scariest feeling I’ve ev
er had in my life.”
He let out an uneasy chuckle, his breath warm against my face as he spoke. “I’ve had many relationships, but nothing like what we have.”
He hugged me tighter. “You wanted to know why I haven’t made love to you yet, that’s why. I waited so long to say that. I-I just didn’t want to scare you away, Micah. I never wanted just sex with you. I told you from the beginning—I want everything.”
I clasped my arms tighter around Rick’s neck and let my tears flow freely.
He loved me.
Rick Thomas loved me.
This was real, and He felt the same way I had been feeling from the very beginning.
I stood on my tiptoes, leaning in to kiss him. “I love you, too, and I’m not just saying that, Rick. I’ve felt the same way for some time but wanted proof that I wasn’t alone in my feelings.”
In a swift motion, He lifted me up from the floor and pressed me against the glass.
My legs wrapped around his waist and I anchored my ankles behind his back, my pebbled nipples brushing against his bare chest.
“You love me, Micah?” He asked, pushing a wayward lock of curly hair away from my face.
“I do, very much.”
“Tell me again.”
“I love you, Rick,” I whispered.
He latched his mouth onto my shoulder, licking and suckling his way down to my breasts. Oh God, his mouth felt like heaven.
Neither of us could catch our breath as Rick moved from one breast to the other, then kissed a path up my neck and collarbone before finding my lips again.
He broke the kiss, and I groaned in complaint. “Micah, please forgive me. I’ve waited too long. I promise to make it up to you all night long, baby, I promise,” he murmured in my ear, slipping his hand between our bodies and running his fingers lightly over my clit.
I screamed as he thrust into me, my back bouncing off the window as Rick worked to release months of pent-up aggression. The dimly lit room and privacy glass prevented residents of adjoining high rises witnessing me getting a pounding for the gods. The reflection of the city’s lights twinkled in Rick’s eyes as sweat trickled down his brow.
The Sweetest Taboo: An Unconventional Romance Page 15