Wish

by Deborah Bladon

  I don’t need a reminder of what I said. I want to pay for the meal, and hold her hand as we go to the clinic. I want to take her home and back to my bed for the rest of the day. For all the days, and nights. Maybe forever.

  “I’ll be home in a couple of hours.” She stands and leans toward me, but stops herself.

  I watch her walk over to Jo, push a few bills into her hand and then leave without looking back.

  Chapter 34

  Tilly

  “I didn’t think you’d show up,” Kate says when I arrive at her store. “I’ve asked you to help me sort through deliveries how many times?”

  At least a half dozen since we met.

  It’s become a running joke between us.

  She’ll tell me that she’s expecting a delivery and could use a hand in exchange for pizza and sodas and I’ll tell her that I just ate.

  “I’m here because I don’t want to be a liar,” I blurt out.

  Her eyes widen. “You’re going to need to explain that. What’s going on?”

  I close the space between us with a few steps. “I was having breakfast with Sebastian and needed some air. I told him I had to come here to help you.”

  “Breakfast with Sebastian?” Her hands reach out to grab my shoulders. “Are we talking about a morning after breakfast, Tilly?”

  I inch up my brows.

  Her gaze darts around the store and the customers who are perusing the dresses. She lowers her voice to a whisper. “Did you two fuck last night?”

  “Yes,” I say quietly.

  She slides one of her hands into mine, tugging me forward. “This way. We’re going to my office. I want all the details.”

  I follow closely behind her as she stops to talk to customers on our way to the back of the store.

  Once we’re there, she slams the door of her office behind us before she turns to face me. “You’re glowing.”

  I run my hand over my forehead. “I’m overheated. I walked here from Crispy Biscuit.”

  “That’s twenty blocks.” She pushes me toward the chair behind her desk. “Sit down before you pass out.”

  I take a seat in the chair, grateful for the reprieve for my aching muscles.

  She settles on the edge of the desk, smoothing the skirt of the pale pink dress she’s wearing. “So tell me how it happened.”

  I’m not about to run through every small detail of last night. It’s not just that it will take too long, but I want to cherish those memories as my own. I don’t want them to become tarnished with her opinion of them.

  They belong to me.

  “He invited me to take a shower with him and I did.”

  Her gaze slides over my face. “Was he good to you? You’re not here because he hurt you or upset you, are you?”

  The level of compassion in her tone surprises me. I reach for her hand and squeeze it. “He’s a good man. He was so good to me.”

  “So good as in one time or five times?” Her concern gives way to curiosity.

  I laugh at her question. She’s asking me how many orgasms I had. “Good as in I lost track.”

  Her hand darts to the middle of her chest. “At least one of us is having great sex.”

  I’m grateful it’s me.

  “You said you needed some air, Tilly. Why?”

  I rub my neck. I wasn’t expecting her to ask me that and I’m not sure I’m prepared to answer. “We went to Crispy Biscuit for breakfast and Jo was there…”

  “I love Jo,” she interrupts.

  I pause to nod before I continue, “I was about to introduce her to Sebastian, but they already met years ago.”

  “It’s that six degrees of separation thing everyone talks about in this city.”

  I look down at my jeans. “Jo said that we were a perfect match. She actually used the words match made in heaven.”

  “I’m on team Jo on this one.” She crosses her legs at the ankles. “I saw how perfect you could be together the day I met him.”

  I look up. “He’s not looking for anything like that, Kate. He doesn’t want a girlfriend. His job is his priority.”

  She slides to her feet. “Did he come right out and tell you that?”

  “Yes, “ I say quickly. “It was the day that Wendy showed up at my apartment.”

  “I thought they might be just fuck buddies.” She tucks a lock of her hair behind her ear.

  “They’re not anymore.”

  “What do you mean?” Confusion knits her brow. “How do you know that?”

  I pause. “Last night when we went for a beer he told me that their arrangement is over.”

  Her gaze wanders over her desk before she focuses on me. “It sounds like you were on a date last night.”

  I throw my head back into the soft leather of the chair. “You’re impossible. We didn’t go on a date. We fucked last night, had breakfast together today and I bailed because I already feel things.”

  “Heart things?” She points at my chest.

  I shrug off the question. “Intense things. I want to spend as much time with him as I can. I want to get back into bed with him and stay there.”

  “So do those things. You’re in love with the way he fucks.”

  “I’m not in love with the way he fucks,” I protest weakly, wondering if that’s a real thing because if it is, I may be guilty of it.

  “You haven’t had sex in a long time,” she points out. “You just had incredible sex. It’s understandable that your feelings are going to be a jumbled mess.”

  I scrub my hand over my forehead. “They are all jumbled together.”

  It’s an understatement. I haven’t been able to think straight since I got into the shower with Sebastian. Jo’s words only added another layer to my confusion.

  “Don’t overthink this, Tilly.” Kate crosses her arms over her chest. “Fucking doesn’t have to lead to anything. It can just be mind-blowing sex.”

  “Do you really believe that?” I ask with skepticism.

  She lowers her voice and leans closer to me. “I believe that you can fuck Sebastian and not let your heart get tangled up in the middle of it.”

  “How do I do that?”

  “You keep your wits about you.” She looks into my eyes. “Never forget that he’s not looking for more. A man like that isn’t likely to change just because he enjoys the sex.”

  “I think I can do that,” I whisper.

  “You can,” she assures me. “Don’t miss out on the time of your life because you’re busy planning the rest of your life in your mind. Live in the moment. You won’t regret it.”

  I hope she’s right. I want to be in Sebastian’s bed again. I want to taste his lips, feel his body, and listen to him come.

  I don’t want my heart to get broken.

  I pray that I won’t fall in love with him.

  Chapter 35

  Tilly

  “How did things go at Kate’s shop?” Sebastian asks as I walk into the apartment three hours later.

  I didn’t expect to hang out at the bridal boutique for most of the afternoon, but I could tell that Kate did need help since the store was filled with soon-to-be brides looking for the perfect dress.

  I opened each of the garment bags that had been dropped off and checked each dress off the corresponding list.

  By the time I was done, Kate had made a few sales, her new inventory was checked in and I felt like I could face Sebastian without letting my mind wander to the future.

  “Everything is taken care of.” I toss my purse and keys on the dining room table. “She owes me pizza and beer now.”

  “Pizza and beer?” He laughs from where he’s standing at the windows that overlook midtown Manhattan. “That’s a great way to get paid for your hard work.”

  My gaze catches on the vase of flowers next to him.

  The withering red and yellow bouquet he bought the day after he moved in has been replaced with white roses.

  They’re my favorite.

  “You bought
flowers again,” I point out the obvious as I cross the room to where he’s standing.

  His brows draw together as he leans against the windowsill. “Flowers make you smile.”

  My heart reacts to his words, upping its beats.

  He looks back out at the city. “My partner is getting married next week. It’s a last minute thing since he’s moving to Chicago soon.”

  “Your partner is leaving?” I look out the window too at the late afternoon sun reflecting off the windows of the building across the street. “So you’ll be getting a new partner?”

  “That’s how it works.” His jaw flexes. “The ceremony and dinner will be at a restaurant uptown. I was wondering if you’d like to go with me?”

  Now, that does sound like a date.

  “I thought it would be good practice for us before Julian and Maya’s big day,” he clarifies. “We’ll check out the maid-of-honor and best man’s moves, so we don’t mess up when it’s our turn to step up to the plate.”

  This is sounding less like a date and more like a research project.

  I nod. “Sure. I’m on board for that.”

  He kisses my forehead. His lips trail a soft path down to my cheek. “Last night was incredible, Matilda.”

  I lean back to look into his stormy blue eyes. I see a heady combination of lust and need.

  Kate’s words circle through my thoughts. I do want more experiences with him. I want to enjoy every second we have together.

  I can sleep with this man and keep my heart from diving into a free-fall.

  “It was one of the best nights of my life,” I whisper as my gaze drops to his lips.

  “Let’s make tonight the best night of your life.” He moves quickly, pulling me into his arms. “I need to go see my lieutenant, but I’ll be back to cook dinner and then...”

  His words get lost in our kiss. It’s slow, sensual, and a promise of what’s waiting for me in his bed tonight.

  ***

  “Ah, Christ.” He leans back on his bed, his hands fisting the sheets, sweat peppering his forehead. “How, Matilda? How the fuck did you learn how to do that?”

  He doesn’t want to know that so I don’t answer.

  I hollow my cheeks again and slide his beautiful, big cock into my mouth.

  We’ve been in his bed for more than an hour.

  He made a simple salad for dinner before he tugged me up from my chair, slid my dress off of me and carried me into his bedroom. I was wearing only my white lace bra and panties.

  I’m still wearing those, but he’s long since stripped himself of his clothes.

  He’s gloriously naked now, laid out like a feast just for me and I’ve been taking full advantage of it.

  We kissed for what felt like a full thirty minutes while I stroked his dick with my hand, inching him closer to an orgasm.

  When he breathlessly announced that he was on the brink of shooting his load all over me, I slid down and took him in my mouth.

  He came.

  I swallowed every last drop and when he tried to push me down to take care of me, I resisted.

  I whispered that I wanted more and he groaned before falling back onto the bed, his cock already hard again.

  “Your cock is perfect.” I run my tongue over the shaft. Trailing kisses down one side before I leisurely lick the base.

  “You love sucking it,” he growls. “My cock. You love sucking my cock.”

  I nod as I inch the tip between my lips again.

  “I want to come inside of you.” He tugs on my hair to pull my head up. “I need to fuck you.”

  I’m in control.

  My desire matches his demands. I’m going to take him to the edge again with my mouth before I sheath his cock and mount him.

  “It’s never been this good,” he whispers the words into the air.

  My hand dips between my legs, wanting to get myself off.

  I want to be his best. I want to be the one that he’ll never forget.

  He stills. “Don’t touch yourself. Please. I want that.”

  His words are breathless and filled with heavy need.

  I move quickly, grabbing the condom package he threw on the bed earlier. I rip it open, carefully cover him and slip out of my panties before I lower myself onto his thick cock in one slow, painfully perfect movement.

  Chapter 36

  Sebastian

  It’s been three days since I fucked Matilda.

  I’ve never had a night like that. She took me in her mouth with an eagerness I haven’t experienced with a woman before.

  Many women have sucked me off, but not one of them took their time to savor me the way Matilda did.

  She expertly read my body’s cues, sucking harder when I needed it before pulling back to lick me softly. She moaned through it all. Those small noises of pleasure made me harder, more frantic to come.

  I came the instant I was in her mouth after she stroked my cock while kissing me. That didn’t stop her. She was on me again. My cock gliding between her soft lips before she slid her tight pussy over me and rode me hard.

  I crave her every second of every day, but our schedules haven’t meshed since that night.

  She’s been working a later shift at the clinic. I’ve been focused on a new case.

  Our interactions have been limited to a brief kiss in the hallway as she leaves the apartment just as I’m getting in.

  I crashed at home for three hours late this afternoon after working all night. I crawled into her bed after she’d left so I could fall asleep surrounded by the smell of her.

  “Sebastian,” Darrell calls from across the squad room. “I thought we were meeting for a drink last night.”

  Shit. I forgot to text him to cancel.

  I rest my hand on my forehead as he nears my desk. “So you came all the way down here to find out why I stood you up?”

  He chuckles. “I know why. You’ll have an arrest warrant for your suspect in your hand within the hour.”

  “Good.” I lean back in my chair. “That still doesn’t explain what you’re doing here.”

  “I’m here to see Brant.” He looks around the squad room. “Where is he?”

  I shrug. “I have no fucking clue. He’s probably out sampling wedding cakes.”

  Brant’s mind hasn’t been on the job since he announced that Remy said yes. He’s been sloppy and distracted. I’ve called him out on it twice, but I get it. He’s already planning his life in Chicago.

  He starts working in narcotics there a week after he leaves New York.

  “Speaking of wedding cakes.” Darrell drops into Brant’s chair. “I got an email invitation to the big event. Do you want to be my plus one?”

  “I got one too and I have a date.”

  “You’re bringing a woman to Brant’s wedding?” He leans forward on his elbows. “Who?”

  I hesitate for a beat before I answer. “Her name is Matilda. She’s my roommate.”

  “That’s an upgrade from the guy you were living with.”

  “I sold my apartment.” I look down at the witness statement in front of me. “I rented the extra room in a friend’s place. Matilda is her sister.”

  “So it’s a platonic thing?”

  “Was,” I correct him. “It’s more now.”

  He shoots me an impatient look. “What’s the deal with you two? Is it a good time thing or more?”

  “It’s a one day at a time thing.” I feel my shoulders tense. I don’t like talking about women with Darrell, or anyone for that matter. I sure as hell don’t want to discuss what I’m feeling for Matilda with him.

  He pushes back from the desk to stand. “I’m looking forward to meeting this woman at the wedding.”

  “Don’t tell her what an asshole I am at work.” I cock a brow. “She thinks I’m a good guy.”

  He considers my words as he buttons his suit jacket. “She’s right. You’re one of the good ones, Sebastian.”

  The jury is still out on whether that’s true or n
ot.

  ***

  “Detective Wolf!”

  I turn at the sound of a child’s voice calling my name. It’s Cooper Gallo. He’s racing toward me on the sidewalk outside the station with his mother holding tightly to his hand.

  “Is this where you work?” He looks up at the building.

  “It is.” I brush my hand across his forehead to push his bangs from his eyes. “It’s good to see you, Cooper. You too, Carolyn.”

  “Sebastian,” she says my name through a deep breath as she adjusts some shopping bags in her free hand. “Cooper spotted you on the other side of the street. We practically sprinted the entire way.”

  I laugh. “I’m glad you caught me.”

  “We’re going for ice cream.” Cooper bounces on his toes. “Can you come with us?”

  “Cooper.” Carolyn bends so she can look at him eye-to-eye. “Detective Wolf is a very busy man. He’s working right now, sweetheart.”

  I was on my way to grab something for dinner, but I look down at the little boy’s hopeful expression. It can’t hurt to indulge in ice cream. Besides, Carolyn is a friend to Matilda and she looks like she could use an extra set of hands to help out right now.

  I reach to take the bags from her. “I’ve got some time and I’m craving a scoop of mint chocolate chip.”

  Cooper drops his mom’s hand to take mine. “Do you like the ice cream at Cremza? It’s our favorite place.”

  “Mine too. Lead the way,” I reply, wishing I had Matilda by my side.

  Chapter 37

  Tilly

  Now I get it.

  I couldn’t figure out why the hell Carolyn insisted I leave work to take my dinner break at an ice cream shop with her and Cooper.

  I tried to explain on the phone that I was dead tired and eating my sandwich was taking all the effort I could muster, but she was adamant that I leave the clinic to come to Cremza.

  I’m glad I did.

  Sebastian is sitting next to Cooper and Carolyn.

  I don’t care that my hair is falling from the messy bun I tied it up in earlier. It doesn’t matter that I didn’t bother with any makeup but a light coat of mascara today.