A Long Time Coming

by Heather Van Fleet

  “He’s a good boy. I’ve always liked him.”

  “And I’ve always loved him.” Her dad patted her hand and sat down on the bed next to her feet.

  “Dad?”

  “Yeah, sweetie?”

  Her eyes welled with tears, even as she tried to push them away. “I… I’m sorry for how awful I was that night in the kitchen.”

  “Abigail, I would’ve hated me too.”

  She shrugged, shutting her eyes, a wasted attempt at keeping her tears away. The things were on a never ending drip cycle anymore. She wanted to stop crying, but every time she touched her stomach, or even moved the wrong way, she couldn’t help it. She hurt…everywhere. “Never Dad. I could never hate you.” And then he was there, hugging her, crying into her shoulder, apologizing again. With his tears, he was healing, and so was she… slowly, little by little.

  That reckless car had stolen something from everyone, her especially. And as much as she wanted to continue feeling sorry for herself, she knew she couldn’t keep it up. She had a duty left here in life, even if it hurt to think about the loss. She was a girlfriend, a daughter, a friend. And by freaking god she couldn’t let the bad things steal away from her future of adding more good things to that list.

  Wife… Mother…

  She smiled into his shirt, gripping him tighter in her arms. Yes… She would mourn, and then she would move on, because she was Abigail Zane…

  And that’s exactly what Abigail Zane did best.

  Chapter Twenty–Nine

  One month later…

  “Abigail, I know you’re sleeping, and I know that you can’t hear me. And I’m really glad you can’t cuz then I’d feel like a serious pussy for getting all emotional on you here. But what I have to say has to be said now. I can’t wait any longer.” He swallowed the tight lump in his throat as he sat on her floor next to her living room couch.

  He had stayed away a little more than usual the past few days. Mainly because his mom was struggling and needing him—but also because Abigail hadn’t fought for him to stay when he told her he had to be gone. She needed space and he broke his promise and gave it to her. But now was his moment to make up for the time lost.

  The fact that she’d made the decision to come down from her room was something awesome in itself. Sure, his ego was a little bruised that he hadn’t been here to help, but still, he was proud of her. Damn proud of the miniscule, but all–too–important decision she had made.

  “I want you to know something. And I don’t know how to tell you this while you’re awake, so I’m gonna just get it out now while my balls are still sort of attached.” He scratched the back of his head. Damn, why was he so freaking nervous? She was sleeping for Christ’s sake. “Okay, so I’ve tried to tell you in the past, but now, seeing you here like this…” he settled back against the couch, careful not to jar her with his movements. His hand drifted towards her leg, holding on to the blanket that covered it.

  “You need to know something about the night of my accident. You need to know what I had decided to do before I got in the car to go get my sister.” Ugh, fuck, she was sleeping. Why was his tongue, not wanting to move? He just needed to spit it out. Her mom told him she had agreed to take some pain meds to knock her out fully for a while—another step he had been trying to get her to take since the night she first came home from the hospital. Leave it to Abigail, though, to take that step on her own. She was a strong, stubborn girl—always doing things at her own pace. Even for something as simple as taking medicine.

  “Okay, so…yeah, this is tough.” He groaned, shutting his eyes, resting his head back against the cushion.

  “Mm, don’t stop now Mr. Dream Man. This sensitive version of my boyfriend is exactly what I need. Oh, and if he adds in a kiss or two, I wouldn’t complain.”

  Shit… She was awake? Why in the hell was she awake? She wasn’t supposed to hear this. She was supposed to be passed out—in a drug coma—only to wake up after having heard nothing. His hands shook as he turned to face her. His face went level with hers and as always, his forehead gravitated towards hers. He lifted a hand, lowering his fingers onto her cheek, seeing the light had returned to her eyes. Finally, dammit, finally… Now there’d be no way in hell he could stop talking if he tried.

  “You’re up.”

  Grinning wildly, she raised her hand and covered the back of his. “I am.”

  “How are you feeling?”

  The tips of his fingers found her chin with his other hand, and he ran the pad of his thumb back and forth, right above the spot where the last of her bruises sat. She flinched at the movement, almost as though she had forgotten what was there, so he stopped.

  Determined to keep her focused, he lowered his mouth, pressing it softly to hers. He smiled against her lips, happy to grant her the first of the couple of kisses she’d asked for.

  “I’m better now,” her whispered words lingered over his mouth. He sighed at the sensation, shutting his eyes when her hands found the nape of his neck. The curly tangles sitting just at the base were fast becoming her play toys again. “Please don’t stop talking on account of me though.” Her winking eye was the first living proof that she was coming back to him.

  Oh what a difference a month could make.

  It was time to reward her, tell her his secret then. And he would add to it with a new one.

  * * *

  Never had she recalled a time in her life where her heartbeat had thundered so loudly in her ears. But with David there, his mouth inches from hers, his hands pressed against her face, she was ready for the heart attack he was about to bring upon her, just as long as he stayed close to her the whole time.

  His mouth opened, a humongous smile took over his lips. Goosebumps flickered up and down her arms at that single, perfect sight that was his happiness. “What I was saying, before you so rudely woke up, is that the night of my accident—before I left my house—I had decided something…”

  Eyes widening, she stared up at him as he settled back onto the floor next to the couch. Her upper body throbbed as she moved to get closer to him, but the pain was nothing in comparison to the anxiety his devilish look was triggering in her head. In response, too, her dumb heartbeat increased even more, and she pressed her fist over the top, worried she wouldn’t be able to stop it from combusting inside of her chest.

  “And just what had you decided?”

  Seriously here…were throats supposed to bob up and down as much as his was doing? Jesus, he was just as nervous as she was. What in the hell was he trying to say here? Reaching for his face, she made him refocus on hers, needing to see his eyes, the brown eyes that burned deep into her soul.

  “Come on David, just tell me.”

  “I was going to ask you out the next day. I was tired of waiting for the right time. I was tired of other guys fawning over you too. I wanted to kiss you and I wanted you to be mine.” A light flickered on in her darkened head at his simple, soft–spoken words. Holy, freaking, hell… no way… “You were supposed to go to the game out of town that next day with Harley, remember? I had it all lined up with the guys on the team. They were going to wear these shirts I had made, under their jerseys. Each one of them had two letters written on the back. And at the end of the game, they were going to line up and turn around so their backs were to the crowd—to you in particular—and then you’d see it.”

  Breathing was now impossible. Damn him! All this time she’d waited… Wondered… Loved… And he had this all planned out? Things had been so close, but still so far away at the same time back then. Things would have been so different too… But again, would it have lasted? They were sixteen—so young back then. Granted they were still young, but yet they had been through things most thirty–year–olds hadn’t.

  Her hands tightened in his hair and she pulled his head flush with hers again. She needed his touch on her—his skin—David in general. “And what did the jerseys say, D?”

  “They said… I love you, Abs.”


  One tear, two tears, three… After that she stopped counting and simply let them fall. They felt freeing. Awesome… Made the moment that much more real. “And what if I didn’t love you back?” She grinned, letting the feel of his hair slide through her fingers once more. There was no way she would have denied him, even back then.

  One side of his mouth tipped up. His cheeks were adorably flushed and his big brown eyes seemed to change to black the longer he held them with hers. “Then I would have tried again the next time. It was bound to happen. You knew it… I knew it… Hell, everyone around us did.”

  “Yeah, you were a cocky thing back then, though, weren’t you,” she teased, feeling the need to take his mouth and put it right back onto hers again. She missed those lips most of all.

  She had pushed him away the past six weeks—too locked in her own grief—completely six feet under to care about anything but her own loss. Never once had she thought about how he was handling everything. But now, right this very minute, things were going to change. She could feel the life coming back into her. Feel her heartbeat steadily in her chest. She would always feel the loss of their baby, but it was about damn time to pull her body to the surface again, even if it hurt like hell in the process.

  “I wasn’t cocky,” his face grew redder. “I just knew what I wanted back then. It’s just too bad I never got the chance to make good on those jerseys. I was really proud of that idea.”

  She couldn’t resist, she had to do something—anything to get him closer. This sweet, endearing, all around awesome boy did things to her body that she couldn’t control. And the only remedy at easing those feelings was to bring his face closer to hers. So she went in for the kill—determined to scratch her itch. But instead of finding his full, pink lips, she hit the tip of his nose instead.

  It just sort of fit the moment.

  “Why David Paul, I do believe it’s the thought that counts the most, am I right?” Unable to help herself, she kissed his nose again, the sound echoing throughout the room as she took the tiny smooch to a full–on smack this time.

  “Mmm, well, if I get a kiss on the nose for that idea, then I have to wonder what I’ll get for this one…”

  It wasn’t the moment that stole her breath away—it was his eyes—the pure joy and hope in them as he brought the tiny black box from out of his pocket. Then when he fell backwards, landing on his knee? Hell, that didn’t just steal her breath. That stole her very soul.

  “W–what are you doing?”

  “Something that scares the shit out of me.”

  Yeah, her too… But the nervous smile on his face was no match for the shaking of his hands. And then he popped open the box, and her trembling erupted worse than his.

  “Abigail, I love you—”

  “No…”

  “No?” Eyes widening in confusion, he fell back on his butt with a thump. “Shit that hurt!” He cried, rubbing his tailbone with his fist. His face had whitened, and he lowered his chin onto his chest. And then he tucked that very box, right back into his pants.

  Christ, that wasn’t a no–no, that was a is this really happening no! “David, wait, please!” Gnawing on her lip, she readied the words on her tongue and reached for his arm.

  Crap, she was doing this all wrong. “I…just…ack, keep going, please?”

  Sighing, he lifted the box from his pocket once more. But this time, he didn’t make a move to open it. Instead, he just held it there, offering it to her with the tilt of his chin and the nod of his head. Reaching for it was almost impossible, because whatever was inside might change her life in more ways than she could have ever imagined at this point in time.

  “Open it…you might be surprised what you find.” Nodding, she did as he asked, holding her breath as the hinge squeaked.

  Blinking once and then twice—and maybe even ten more times after that—Abigail gaped down at the silver object sparkling right there in center of the box. Never expect the expected—that was destined to be her new motto anymore, because there in that box sat something she definitely couldn’t have foreseen. The longer she studied it, the more confused she grew.

  “So…?” his voice was so unsure, so damn cute too.

  She slowly smiled up at him, studying his skin…his eyes, both bright and perfect. And for the longest time, she couldn’t respond to his one word question. The longer David sat there in front of her—his brown–black eyes wide—the more Abigail realized that this single moment in time, was the happiest thusfar in her life.

  In the past month, she’d gone through more hell than she could have ever imagined a person could go through and survive. She’d lost a baby that was a forever kind of link between the man she loved and herself. But somehow, someway, all the bad crap they’d endured, led them to this moment. And as much as she’d regret the past, she could never regret where she’d come to a stop in this bitch of a journey called life.

  Her throat cleared of emotion, she finally spoke. “Sooo…what does this mean exactly?” There would be no assuming, who knew what this meant to David.

  He leaned in closer, the scent of his bodywash made her stomach twist, but in a way that she’d never get enough of. An addiction…in the best possible sense. David was the man of her nineteen–year–old dreams.

  “It means, that I was hoping to, well—”

  “Move in together.” She didn’t mean to sound so blunt, but that’s just how she was—tell it like it is—don’t avoid the unavoidable.

  “Well, uh, no…but the key actually does open something.”

  Huh, okay, so now she felt like a dumbass. She chewed her lip, her heart traitorously jamming in her throat at her unexpected disappointment. “Then what exactly does it open? Cuz if you throw me some bull crap line about opening your heart, then I’m gonna throw it out because your heart is already mine. You know that as much as I do.”

  Seeming completely taken aback by her outburst, David stuttered his words, scratching at the back of his head. “Well it is, but—”

  “Stop doing that.” She crossed her arms over her chest, and carefully sat up.

  Narrowing his eyes, he sat back. “Stop doing what?”

  “Looking adorable and…stuff.” Ugh, she was getting way too far off track here.

  Scooting closer, smiling once again, he reached for her hands, interlocking them with his. “You’re wrong. I’m not the cute one in this relationship—you are.” And then he kissed her nose. Okay, so she had to admit that the nose kissing thing coming from his lips was entirely more swoon–worthy.

  “Fine, whatever—let’s just call it a tie for now. Now, finish up what you were saying please.” She motioned him along with her hands, her own cheeks heating as she did.

  “So, the key…it opens something.” He grinned, pulling himself up to stand. He reached for her hand, motioning her upwards with the flickering of his fingertips.

  “Um, usually they do…” Did she want to actually go with him somewhere? No, probably not. But still, she found her hand in his and then felt the bottoms of her feet touch the carpet. She wasn’t in control here anymore. David was. And the next thing she knew, he was pulling her forward towards the front door.

  “Don’t, worry, Miss Smart Ass,” he grinned from over his shoulder, “we’re only going outside.”

  The light shining down from the late afternoon sun was almost blinding as she walked hand in hand with David down the sidewalk. The pitter patter of her bare feet on the cool cement was definitely not pleasant. Late November had brought no snow yet, but the temperatures were another story. She hadn’t thought to bring a jacket, just followed whatever her body told her to do as David led her outside. Shudders wracked her body, and her teeth chattered like tiny little drums beating inside her mouth.

  “Christ, let me get you a coat and some shoes. I’m so sorry, Abs.” David’s arm went around her shoulders, pulling her into his chest. The rub of the fabric from her sweatshirt caused her broken parts to ache again, but being in his arms was wo
rth a little bit of torture.

  “I’m good. Let’s just hurry, ’kay?” He nodded, pulling her alongside him down the walk, right up to the street. And it was there that she saw it. A car—a black Mustang car—the same black Mustang that David used to drive, pre–accident. Suddenly, she knew exactly what that car was. David’s freedom. David taking another step in life. The boy had finally gotten his driver’s license again.

  “I know it’s not a huge romantic gesture, but I just…I don’t know, wanted you to see. If you don’t want to ride in it right now, I completely understand,” he turned to face her full on. His gentle giant hands gripped her waistline, slipping under the hem of her sweatshirt. She shivered at the sensation of his warm fingers pressed against her skin, loving how the tips stroked the area sitting just above the seam of her sweatpants. She tipped her head back, fully focusing on his face, needing to see his eyes, wanting nothing more than to get lost in them. She was so proud of him. So damn proud of how far he’d come in two years. David was an angel—her angel—and he needed no wings to prove that. Heaven sent, perfect—he was the only man she’d ever love.

  “I don’t need romantic gestures.”

  Tipping his head to the side, his dark brown hair falling over his eyes, he grinned at her, melting her insides as though they were wax, and he was the flame. “How about a little more wooing then? Can you handle that?”

  The door opened and with the outstretch of his hand, he encouraged her to get into the car. Shaking her head at the goofy, googly grin on his face, she obliged, slipping into the cold leather seat. He practically skipped around to the other side, moving at a pace that shocked her. His therapy had started up again and he was exceeding in all he did—it was like he was finally letting go. Finally healing.

  “Um, yeah…so welcome to my car.” Blinking she stared over at him, noticing the pink tone to his nose and skin from the cool air. First thing she did after that was gaze into the backseat.

  “I think there’s room enough for two back there.”