Way Down There (An Allie Down Mystery Thriller Book 1)

by PJ Fernor

  “Allie,” Ben said.

  “What?” I asked.

  “Two things right now. First, take a deep breath. You need to be able to think clear.”

  “Okay,” I said. “What’s the second thing?”

  “I’m coming over right now.”

  Chapter Sixty

  I had an entire department at my fingertips but I listened to Ben and waited. Each second feeling more painful than the last. Like some cruel slap to the face, as though I needed to feel what Cat and Connor felt when it came to their daughter.

  And if this was something bad that had happened to Lo, then what was I doing just standing around, waiting?

  I went back to her bedroom.

  She had to have been talking with a friend.

  The doors were open.

  Which meant… anything.

  Something bad. Or Lo took off and heard Miss Kesslier and forgot to shut the door.

  “What can I do to help?” Miss Kesslier asked. “I can start going door to door. Ask if anyone saw something. Or I can see if a vehicle was here. Right? Go out front, look around…”

  “I have someone coming over,” I said. “Ben. He’s going to help me figure something out. In the meantime, I hate to say this, but what if you just go home and wait there? I’ll call you the second I-”

  “I can’t leave,” Miss Kesslier said.

  She looked ready to cry herself.

  “Okay. Then maybe make some tea? Keep busy. Think. Maybe you heard Lo say a name. A friend. I mean, I guess I could…”

  I wasn’t sure what I could do.

  Hack into her computer.

  That was about it.

  Get into her computer and get into her social media accounts and find some of her friends.

  The hopeless feeling inside me was so heavy to carry.

  I wanted to call Laura.

  Or Mulvaney.

  I wanted to call anyone who could hurry out there and find Lo.

  The chances of this… of Lo being tied to Jessie… or Lucy…

  I started to dig through Lo’s drawers.

  I didn’t find anything.

  Except in the nightstand drawer there was a picture of her with Alex.

  An old Christmas picture.

  Lo was maybe… Jessie’s age… in the picture. And she and Alex were wearing the same outfit. Alex crouched down, smiling big. Lo looking miserable. It was daytime so there were Christmas lights in the background but they weren’t turned on.

  “Allie, Ben is here,” Miss Kesslier said.

  I jumped up and ran through the apartment.

  All I could think was that Ben would know what to do. Who to call. How to make this right. He had more contacts and connections than I did. Even though this was my hometown, I was still new to it all.

  When I saw Ben standing just inside the apartment, I dug my feet into the carpet.

  He was dressed nice.

  Very nice.

  I’m talking almost a suit nice.

  Nice, black shoes, dark khaki slacks, an off white buttoned down shirt tucked into the slacks. And even a tie that was undone, draped over his neck.

  I had never in my life seen Ben this dressed up before.

  “Whoa,” I said to him.

  “Lo’s phone isn’t on?” he asked.

  “No,” I said. “Miss Kesslier said she went next door and…” I pointed to him. “You’re dressed up nice. Everything okay with your father? I know I’m not supposed to ask…”

  “I never said you can’t ask, Allie,” he said. “I just didn’t expect my personal business to be gossiped around town. But that comes with living in a small town.” Ben shook his head. “Why are we even talking about this again? Lo is missing…”

  “And look at me,” I said. “I don’t know any of her friends. Who to call. Where to go. My mind is racing, Ben. You know what I’m thinking.”

  “I know,” he said. “Here’s what we can do…”

  “It’s ringing!” Miss Kesslier cried out.

  I spun around. “What?”

  She held out her cellphone. “I called again. It’s ringing. The phone is turned on.”

  I looked back at Ben. “Perfect. We can figure out where the phone is. Ping the closest tower and go from there. Just give me the number and I’ll make a quick call to get this moving.”

  Lo’s voicemail picked up.

  Miss Kesslier ended the call and I called from my phone.

  It rang.

  Lo didn’t pick up.

  So I sent her a frantic text.

  Ben stepped out into the hallway after I gave him Lo’s number.

  “Wow, does he clean up nice, huh?” Miss Kesslier whispered to me. “Here I thought he looked good already…”

  I looked at her, not sure how to respond to that.

  Cleaned up…

  Ben came back inside. “We’re going to-”

  “Why are you dressed up nice?” I asked again. Why am I so worried about the way he’s dressed? “I know it’s not my business… but…”

  “Allie, you called me and I showed up,” he said. “We’re going to track down Lo and everything is going to be okay. You didn’t tell me what happened with Connor. I assume it was another dead end.”

  My heart pounded and I felt my defensive walls starting to rise.

  Desperate for a victory.

  And I felt the words slipping out of my mouth…

  “You told me your father needed you,” I said. “You were out or something. What, on a date?”

  Ben sighed. He ran a hand through his hair. “This is what we want to talk about right now?”

  “Why lie to me?”

  “I didn’t lie to anyone,” Ben said. “I had a dinner? Yes. With someone? Yes. Probably bad timing and all that, but it was something in the works for a while. Okay? Right before I could leave though, my father started to have some issues. He got really confused and upset and tried to call the police on the nurses there. He thought they broke in and were stealing my mother’s jewelry. By the time I got him calmed… and he ended up falling asleep… I was late for my dinner.”

  “Your date,” I said.

  “And then you called.”

  “I screwed up your date,” I said. “Just give me the contact info, Ben. I’ll find Lo.”

  “We’re going to find her,” he said. “You’re right about this town right now. It’s panic. Everywhere. I was going to take one hour to myself to get something to eat.”

  With another woman.

  The jealousy took me back to a place I hated myself for.

  Because that’s how it was before with Ben.

  Seeing him with someone else… while I was with Tommy…

  “I don’t know how to handle this,” Ben said. “Us, I mean. With everything else going on. This isn’t the past, Allie. I know it’s hard to come back here. And under the circumstances…”

  I looked back at Lo’s room.

  “I got it,” I said.

  “What?” Ben asked.

  I scrambled to get my keys.

  I rubbed my forehead.

  My eyes tried to fill with tears.

  “I got it,” I said. “I have to go.”

  “Where are you going?” he asked as I darted toward the door.

  “Ben, I know where Lo is.”

  Chapter Sixty-One

  The last time I was in Alex’s house was just after the funeral. It had been a whirlwind week. From the news of the accident to the urgency of understanding that everything was left for me. Including Lo. I had helped Lo through the house to pack up some of her stuff. I told her to bring anything she wanted with her to the city.

  I could have sold the house that day. And every single day since then, but I just couldn’t do it. It was the final piece of Lo and Alex together. Mother and daughter. The memories they had made in the house that I would never know. Every floorboard and dust bunny in the corner had a story that wasn’t mine to hear or remember.

  When I found the fron
t door unlocked, it was like a wave of relief went through me.

  The foyer light was turned on.

  And I saw Lo’s hoodie on the steps.

  “Lo!” I called out. “It’s me! It’s Allie.”

  I hurried to add the last part, fearing I was going to scare her. Or she was going to think her mother was back.

  My heart broke over and over with each step I took to get to the second floor.

  There were pictures along the wall going upstairs. Every school picture of Lo. Family pictures. Holiday pictures. And it was always mother and daughter.

  And without warning, it was ripped apart.

  I turned at the top of the steps. Behind me, down the hallway, was Alex’s bedroom.

  I hadn’t been in there since...

  It just wasn’t the right time yet.

  At the opposite end of the hallway was Lo’s room.

  I always teased Alex.

  Why do you need a four bedroom house when it’s just you and Lo?

  I knocked on Lo’s bedroom door and opened it.

  “Lo, it’s me. It’s Allie.”

  The detective in me took over.

  There had been times when I had to knock on a bedroom door and opened it to find something horrific.

  But that wasn’t the case this time.

  Lo sat in the middle of her old bed, hugging an old teddy bear.

  Her phone was in front of her, right within view.

  Before I said a word, I hurried to text Ben.

  I texted him that Lo was at the old house and she was okay. And then I slipped it in he should go back to his date. That everything was fine. That we’d find Jessie too.

  I knew I was rambling so I just sent the message and put my phone into my pocket.

  “Lo, what are you doing here?” I asked.

  She shook her head.

  “You really scared us,” I said. “Miss Kesslier was upset. I was about to call… it doesn’t matter. I knew where you were. But not answering your phone. That’s not good, Lo. Especially right now.”

  “So is this you being my mother now?” she asked.

  “I don’t know what I am,” I said as I sat down on the corner of the bed. “You were gone. The door was left open. I feared the worst. And I don’t even know who your friends are. Not a single number…”

  Lo sniffled. “I screwed up again.”

  I looked at her. “Lo, talk to me.”

  “It gets to me.”

  “What does?”

  “I feel like I’m not alive,” she said. “Like tonight. I was just sitting there. And I heard Miss Kesslier humming. It was some song. My mother used to hum it. I felt like the room was spinning. Like I was getting sick. I was looking at old pictures…” Lo exhaled a shaky breath. “Why do I do that? It’s like I decide I want to cry but then can’t by just thinking about it. So I have to see pictures. Then I look and I… I cry…”

  Lo buried her head into the teddy bear.

  I slowly pried the stuffed animal away and tossed it off the bed.

  I hugged her as she exploded with fresh tears.

  She grabbed the back of my shirt.

  “I’m so sorry, Lo,” I said. “I miss her too. If you ever want to come to this house, we can. You just tell me and we’ll come here. We’ll live here. We can spend the night. Anything you need.”

  Lo pulled away from me and sucked in a breath. “It’s not that.”

  “Then what is it?” I asked. I touched her face. I wiped her tears. “Lo, what is it then? You can’t do this to me. To us.”

  “I freaked out and ran,” she said. “I heard Miss Kesslier and I left the door open. I got a ride here. My friend. Megan. I’ll write her name down for you.”

  I swallowed hard. “Lo, you should have called me. Texted me. Told me.”

  “You don’t get it.”

  “What don’t I get.”

  “What I said to her…”

  “What are you talking about?”

  Lo’s eyes went wide. “I knew about her drinking problem. Okay? And she used to drink and drive a lot. And I told her to stop it. And she wouldn’t.”

  “Oh, Lo,” I said.

  “Just wait,” Lo said. “The last thing I said to her… she was leaving that night… and I told her if she left… because she was drunk, okay? She was drinking. And I told her if she drove, I would hate her forever. I said that to her. To my own mother. I said that I’d hate her. And then she died.”

  I grabbed Lo again and hugged her tight.

  She cried again.

  I hadn’t known that was the last thing she said to her mother. And I hadn’t known how bad Alex’s drinking had really been.

  “Lo, you have to hear me out,” I said. “It’s time to talk to someone. Okay? You need to get this out. Get this off your chest. You’re grieving and feeling guilty. You’re carrying more than anyone around you realizes.”

  Lo nodded. “I know.”

  I moved her away from me and I touched her face to wipe her tears again.

  “I’ll help you,” I said. “You find someone you trust. And talk it all out. There’s no shame in it, Lo. This has been a lot to take on. And moving back here. Me with this case. I’m going to give the case to Ben for good. And have him bring someone else in.”

  “No,” Lo said. She jumped back. “No. You have to find her, Allie. You have to find that little girl. Please.”

  “Okay,” I said. “Okay. I’m going to find her. She’s going to be okay. And you’re going to be okay too.”

  “I don’t want to be here anymore,” Lo said.

  “Then let’s get out of here,” I said. “We will lock up together and go to the apartment.”

  “Go home,” Lo said.

  “Right. Home.”

  I stood up and Lo took my hand.

  “You can get help too,” Lo whispered.

  “What?” I asked.

  “You can talk to someone too, Allie. It’s been a lot for you too.”

  “You’re right,” I said. “Maybe I will. We’ll do it together, Lo. You and me. We’ve got this thing. We have no choice. I’m not going to give up.”

  “I’m sorry I didn’t answer my phone,” she said. “I got here and turned it off. I just wanted to… be alone.”

  I hugged her again. “It’s okay. We’re together. I found you. I’ll always find you if you get lost, Lo. Just remember that.”

  Lo hugged me back and we stood in silence.

  I realized I had tied Alex’s death to Jessie’s disappearance in Lo’s heart. And I promised I would find Jessie. And find her alive.

  In my mind, I counted how many hours it had been since Jessie went missing…

  It was too many hours.

  I shut my eyes.

  I decided to silently weep as I held Lo in my arms.

  Chapter Sixty-Two

  When we stepped through the door to get to the apartment, Miss Kesslier stood there waiting. She covered her mouth for a second and made a daring move at Lo. She wrapped her arms tight around Lo and let out a sound that was a mix of a cry and yell of relief.

  Lo hugged Miss Kesslier back and I just stood there, letting them each have their moment.

  “I was so worried about you,” Miss Kesslier said.

  “I’m so sorry, Miss Kesslier,” Lo said. “I don’t know what got into me.”

  Miss Kesslier stepped back. She had a definite Mom look on her face. As though she wanted to give Lo a piece her mind for what had happened. But she held back. Which made her strong. And it made her a friend. And maybe it even made her family.

  All that she had done for us in such a short period of time.

  “I promise I will never do that again,” Lo said. “I just lost myself.”

  “Sweetheart, we all do,” Miss Kesslier said. “Next time, if you feel a little lost, you can tell me. I won’t bug you with questions. I’ll get you a flashlight. Okay?”

  I cringed at the bad joke.

  Lo simply nodded.

  Sh
e went into the apartment and I stopped to give Miss Kesslier a hug too.

  “Thank you,” I whispered to her. “For caring.”

  “I was worried sick, Allie.”

  “I know. She just went home. Her real home.”

  “This is her real home,” Miss Kesslier said, nodding to the apartment. “I know a lot is happening, but make it home for her. Unless you decide to move.”

  “I don’t see us going anywhere for a while,” I said.

  “Good. Do you need anything else from me?”

  “No,” I said. “You should get some rest. It’s been quite the night.”

  “Night? Try day… week… more…”

  “I know,” I said. “I can’t stop saying thank you to you.”

  “Go be with Lo. She needs you.”

  Jessie needs me too. So does Lucy. Even if she’s not here, she still deserves to have her story told.

  I hugged Miss Kesslier again. She was in a way the only sense of family I had.

  When I entered the apartment I was hit with a sense of betrayal. Thinking about Ben on a date. Knowing he made plans to see someone. Not that he and I were anything. Then or now. Or tomorrow or the week after that.

  It just felt good to feel a sense of connection. My sister dying. His father being sick. Us working on the case together.

  I went into Lo’s room and she was already tucked in.

  “I can’t believe I did that.”

  “You didn’t do anything wrong,” I said.

  “Yes, I did,” she said. “I scared everyone. I didn’t even think about that poor missing girl. You must have thought…”

  “It doesn’t matter what I thought,” I said. “You’re here. Home. Safe.”

  “I just wanted to see the house again.”

  “And we can see it anytime we want,” I said. “You just tell me and we’ll go over.”

  “Okay. Thank you.”

  I leaned down and kissed her forehead. “Get some sleep.”

  “Allie… that little girl…”

  “Lo…”

  “What’s going to happen if you don’t find her? Or what if she ends up like that other little girl? Who would do something like this? To them? Why…”