by S. J. McCoy
Her gaze flew up to meet his. There. He’d said it.
She smiled. “Okay, no need to go overboard. I know you don’t mean that, but if you want a break from your usual pastimes, then Marcus and I will gladly come along for the ride.
Eddie nodded. She wasn’t going to take the bait, then? She wasn’t even going to acknowledge that he was serious. Oh, well. He’d had to try. “In that case, the ride next weekend will be on four-wheelers. We can stop in at the office and book it when we take the boat back.”
April nodded and turned to look out across the water. He followed her gaze; it seemed she was just staring at the scenery. It must be pretty different scenery than what she was used to. “Do you miss Montana?”
She shook her head without turning to look at him. “Not really, no. It is beautiful up there, but it’s beautiful here too, in a different way. I guess I do miss the valley, but I don’t miss the life I had there.”
Eddie didn’t know what to say. He wanted to ask her what her life had been like. He knew she’d escaped a bad marriage, but he didn’t know what that meant exactly. He waited to see if she was going to elaborate.
She turned and gave him a sad smile. “It was horrible. The man I was married to wasn’t a nice man.” She shuddered, making him want to put an arm around her, to protect her from the memories. “I suppose I deserved it.”
Eddie raised an eyebrow hoping she didn’t mean what he thought she did, but not wanting to interrupt her.
“No, I don’t mean I deserved to be hit.”
Eddie swallowed, hard. He wanted to hit something himself at the thought of some faceless bastard of an ex ever laying a finger on her. He bit his lip in an attempt to keep his anger in.
“I mean, if I’d been stronger, I would have gotten out of there years ago, but I was scared. I was scared that he’d take Marcus away from me somehow. He always threatened to. I should have been smarter, braver should have gotten us both away from him. It’s Marcus who didn’t deserve any of it, you know? He’s just a sweet little soul. He’s scared of his own shadow; he’s spent his whole little life treading carefully, trying not to set his dad off. Can you imagine what it’s like trying to please someone who is totally unpredictable? Poor Marcus used to try all kinds of things to get his dad’s attention when he was little, trying to earn his love, but it never worked. As he got older, he changed; he stopped trying to get Guy’s attention, because whenever he did, nothing good came of it. He learned to stay out of his way, to make himself invisible. That’s not how a little boy should have to live, is it?”
He knew it was a rhetorical question, but he answered anyway. “It sure as hell isn’t. Poor little dude. You should be proud of yourself, getting him out of that situation, bringing him here. How’s he liking it?” Eddie remembered how wary Marcus had seemed when he’d talked to him in Vegas. He’d seemed scared at first and even when Eddie had said he’d teach him to play guitar he’d been hopeful, but skeptical. It sounded like he was used to being let down.
April’s smile was back. “He absolutely loves it here. He’s got so many good things going on here. He loves school. He’s making friends; he and Ethan have become the best of buddies. And Ethan’s so different, so outgoing and confident. He’s a good influence.”
Eddie smiled. Ethan was a handful, but he was a good kid. “I want to add to the list of good things he’s got going on. We should ask him what he’d like to do. I mean, we’ll go four-wheeling next weekend, and I’ll teach him to play guitar, but I’ll bet there are other things he’d like to get into too. I’d love to help him along.” He was grinning to himself now, loving the idea of making life better for Marcus.
“Why?” April’s smile was gone.
He stared at her. It was a fair question, he supposed. Why did he want to help the little dude out? He shrugged. “I dunno. Who wouldn’t want to help a little kid find a better life?”
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to sound rude or ungrateful. I was just curious.”
He smiled. “I’m a nice guy, is that a good enough reason?”
She smiled back. “Yeah, it is. Sorry.” He could tell she was still a little uncertain. And that was fair enough. He had to question his motivation, too. Was it just a case of wanting to help a little kid out? Or was it because he was her kid? Or was it something else? “What are you thinking?” she asked.
He looked up at her; he was going to admit it. “Well, like you, I’m just wondering why I want to go out of my way to help the little dude out. Yes, I think it’s what any decent person would do if they could.” He gave her what he hoped was a disarming smile. “But also, I think I’m trying to impress you.”
She smiled back and shook her head at him. “And?”
Okay, so she wasn’t buying that. Time to move on and admit it. “Honestly, now I’ve thought about it, I just feel I can relate to him. I remember how it feels to be in his shoes. I wish someone would have taken an interest in me, helped me through the tough times when I was his age.”
April’s eyes widened in surprise. “Your dad…you went through that, too?”
He shook his head. “Not in the same way that I think you’re talking about.” He didn’t want to say that his dad hadn’t hit him like he believed Marcus’s had. “But I struggled as a kid, trying to earn my dad’s love. Then he left, and I thought he didn’t love me at all. My mom remarried, and my stepdad was, is, an asshole. He made my life hell.” He sighed. “But that’s enough about me; I just mean I’d like to help Marcus out because I think I can understand how he feels. When you’re a kid, you want to feel there’s someone there for you, and it sucks when all the adults in your life let you down and hurt you over and over again.” The look on her face made him hold up a hand. “I don’t mean you let Marcus down. I’m talking about me, not him. You’ve done great by him. And especially now, now that you’ve brought him here.”
April nodded sadly. “I hope so. I didn’t do great by him for far too many years. I should have taken him away from there a long time ago, but I’m trying to make up for it now.” She brightened a little and smiled at him. “And if you do want to help, then yes, please.”
~ ~ ~
The way Eddie smiled at her turned April’s insides to mush. Not only was he sexy-as-sin, but he was turning out to be a decent guy. She’d thought he was just a party guy, a good-time kind of guy, but he was showing her so much more than that side of him. To be fair, he’d seemed like a nice guy when they were in Vegas for the weddings, but she’d dismissed that since they’d been back. She’d hardly seen him around at all. When she did see him, he was singing at the resort—and he had lots of admirers.
He was maneuvering the boat back alongside the dock at the resort. It had been so much fun to spend time on the water with him like that. She understood now why Marcus loved going out in Michael’s boat so much. She hoped Eddie might want to go out again with the two of them. She really shouldn’t get greedy. He’d promised guitar lessons and a four-wheeler ride already, she shouldn’t go hoping for too much. Part of her had to wonder if he hadn’t just found himself at a loose end this weekend. Though another part of her knew that couldn’t be true. She was pretty sure the girl with the red lipstick from last night would have been more than happy to keep him busy all weekend!
One of the guys came out of the kiosk and grabbed the rope that Eddie threw him as they came alongside the dock. April had been dreading this part. She’d felt sure she was going to fall in the water when they got in the boat. Now she had to climb out again.
Eddie smiled that smile at her again. “Hang on, let me get out first.”
She rolled her eyes skyward and tried to hide her smile as his perfect round ass passed in front of her face!
He turned back, and held a hand out to her. “Come on. I’ve got you.”
She gripped his hand tight and leaped for it. In her effort not to fall short of the dock and fall in the water, she heaved herself up a little more enthusiastically than he must have been expecting
. She landed right in front of him, almost knocking him over. He closed his arms around her in an attempt to steady them both, which helped her balance but did nothing to steady her heart.
“Sorry,” she stammered as she looked up into eyes. She wasn’t though, not really. He felt so good with his arms around her.
“I’m not.” He held her a little closer as he looked down at her.
For a moment she wanted to hug him back. She wanted to reach up and kiss his gorgeous full lips that were smiling down at her. But she knew that what you want to do and what you need to do are rarely the same thing. So she did what she needed to in order not to embarrass them both. She stepped back. “I can be a klutz at times; I should have warned you.”
He looked disappointed—he mustn’t like klutzes. He couldn’t be disappointed about anything else. He couldn’t be as disappointed as she was that she was no longer in his arms. “That’s okay. You’ve got me to catch you now.”
She closed her eyes for a moment; she really had to stop twisting his words. Had to stop reading her own meaning into them. There was no way he could mean that the way she wanted him to.
As they walked back up the dock, she spotted Kenzie and Laura sitting out on the deck at the restaurant. She hoped they wouldn’t spot her, but Kenzie grinned and started to wave. She looked up at Eddie, wondering if he’d be embarrassed to be seen out with her, but he was grinning and waving back at Kenzie. Why should he be embarrassed, after all? They were just hanging out as friends.
“Hey, you two. What are you up to?”
Eddie smiled. “We took one of the boats out for the afternoon.”
“That’s awesome,” said Laura. She gave April a meaningful look which she didn’t understand. “Did you have fun?”
It seemed as though the question was loaded with innuendo, but for the life of her, April couldn’t figure out why. “Yes, thanks. I have to be getting back home now, though. Marcus will be home soon.” She looked up at Eddie. “Thanks.”
He brought his hand up to rub the side of his head. “No problem. Come on.” He started walking again before she could argue.
She’d thought she should take off now. He was back at the resort, and no doubt had better things to do, and for some reason, the way Kenzie and Laura had been smiling at them made her just want to get out of there.
He smiled down at her as she caught up with him. “You don’t get rid of me that easily.”
“I just thought you might have had enough by now.”
He shook his head. “Well, you thought wrong. I’d like to hang out and see Marcus when he gets home. If that’s okay?”
She wasn’t so sure about that. She didn’t like the idea of Eddie being in their house when Marcus came home. It didn’t feel right; it should be her and Marcus together. She frowned. She didn’t know how to say that because she wasn’t entirely sure what her reasoning was.
Eddie picked up on it, though. “Okay, so how I about I walk you home. You probably want him all to yourself tonight after he’s been gone. Can I stop by tomorrow?”
She nodded. That would be better for Marcus. And it would be better for Eddie too. It’d give him time to hang out with his groupies before he went on stage tonight. “You don’t have to walk back with me, though.”
“I know I don’t have to, but I want to.”
She smiled. She wasn’t going to argue. “Okay then, we’re nearly there now anyway.”
She stopped when she reached her front gate. “Thanks so much for today. I enjoyed myself more than I have in a long time.”
“Me too.”
It’d be so easy to believe that he meant it while he was smiling at her like that, but she had to remember he enjoyed himself every night, singing on stage and partying afterward. He was just being kind.
“What time should I come tomorrow?”
“Whenever you like; Marcus will be so pleased to see you.”
He nodded. “And will you?”
Her gaze flew up to meet his. She nodded slowly. “Yes.” He didn’t need to know how much!
“Good.” He stepped forward and closed his arms around her.
She hugged him back; it felt so good! She’d never dreamed that she would stand at her own front gate in the arms of a gorgeous guy as they said goodbye. For a moment, she was just going to enjoy the fantasy and ignore the fact that it was only a friendly hug.
Eventually, he leaned back and smiled down at her. “See you tomorrow, then.”
While she was nodding dumbly, he bent down and landed a peck on her lips before turning and walking away. Wow! She touched her lips in disbelief. Had he really done that? Just wow. It must be a friendly thing, right? Lots of people kissed their friends. It didn’t mean anything. It certainly couldn’t mean what she wished it did!
Chapter Five
The next morning, Eddie sat out on his front deck sipping his coffee again. He loved that he got to spend his free time here. The house was at the end of a quiet road, and although it sat on a couple of acres and was right here on the lakeshore, it was a little rundown. It didn’t bother him one bit, but it had meant that Austin, the realtor, had had a hard time renting it out—until Eddie came along and fell in love with it. It even had a little wooden dock where he spent some of his evenings fishing. He smiled to himself. He should take Marcus out there and teach him to fish. Maybe the kid already knew how. He used to live in Montana; surely he’d done some outdoorsy stuff up there. He wanted to go four-wheeling, so he must enjoy that. He realized he didn’t know the first thing about the boy, so he should take the time to watch and listen and learn—not make assumptions about him and then go trying to impose them. That would be the last thing the little dude needed.
Eddie shrugged. He’d get started later on finding out what Marcus liked and didn’t like. He was planning to head on back to their house mid-morning. He was hoping both April and Marcus would want to hang out with him today. He’d enjoyed her company yesterday. He’d had a few close calls, though. She’d made it pretty clear she wasn’t interested in him as anything more than a friend, but when she’d stumbled against him getting out of the boat he hadn’t been able to resist the opportunity to hold her for a moment. She’d felt so good all wrapped up in his arms. He’d had a crazy feeling about wanting to keep her there forever, about not wanting to let anything hurt her ever again. He sighed. Crazy shit! Then when he’d walked her home, and she hadn’t wanted him to come in, he’d gone and kissed her! What had he been thinking? He hadn’t been thinking at all; that was the problem. He’d just gone with what he felt, what he wanted. And that was wrong. He should have been respecting how she felt, what she wanted, and she hadn’t given him any sign that she wanted him to kiss her. Still, he’d managed to restrict himself to a quick peck on the lips; there was that, at least. It was probably the one and only kiss he’d ever share with her. He stood up. He didn’t like that thought at all. He should get going. He wanted to stop by the resort on his way out.
Ben waved at him as he pulled up in the square and came over to join him as he got out of his car. “Hey, Eddie. How’s it going?”
He nodded. “I’m doing good, thanks, Ben. How about you? How are things?” Ben had a different air about him since Vegas. Eddie wasn’t entirely sure what had gone down there with his ex, Charlotte, but he knew something had. It seemed it had given Ben a new lease on life. He smiled a lot more; he laughed a lot more. He was still the same Ben, still looked out for everyone, still worked his ass off day and night, but he was different. Happier.
“I’m great myself. In fact, I’ve given myself a couple of hours off this afternoon, and I’m going to take one of the boats out on the lake.”
Eddie did a double take. “Did I hear you right?” he asked with a laugh. “You’re going to take some time off—and have fun?”
Ben laughed. “You heard me. I think I deserve it, don’t you?”
“Hell, yes, you do. It’s just that everyone else has been telling you that ever since I’ve known you, and
you’ve never done it before. What’s going on?”
Ben shrugged and gave him a mysterious smile. “Life is for living, right? I’d forgotten that. Now I’m remembering, and I’m trying to make the most of every day. Today is the only time when you can make anything happen. You can’t change yesterday, and you can’t live for tomorrow.”
Eddie nodded. “True, but possibly a little philosophical for me.”
Ben laughed. “Don’t worry about it. It makes sense to me, and that’s all that matters. What are you doing today?” He raised an eyebrow. “I hear you made pretty good use of yesterday.”
Eddie wasn’t sure what to say.
Ben grasped his shoulder. “Don’t worry. I think it’s awesome. April’s a sweetheart, and you’re a good guy.”
“It’s not like that, though.”
“It isn’t? I heard you were hugging on each other down at the boat dock and that you spent the day together.”
Eddie sighed. “We did, but just as friends.”
“Oh. Just friends?”
He nodded.
“You’re not interested?”
How much did he want to say? Oh, what the hell, this was Ben he was talking to. “Of course, I’m interested. Like you said, she’s a sweetheart, and she’s a good-looking woman…”
“But?”
“But she’s not interested in me.”
Ben laughed. “You’re kidding me? I’ve never seen a woman not be interested in you. I mean, you’re like a rock star around here. All the girls are after you.”
Eddie laughed. “Okay, so I can’t deny I have some pull with the ladies, but April’s different. She’s not some chick out looking for a good time. She’s a mom, she’s got Marcus to think about, and she has a past to deal with, too. A girl like that wants someone steady, someone responsible, someone like you, not someone like me.”
“And she told you that?”
“She didn’t need to. Any fool can see that. I asked her if she wanted to hang out as friends and she was happy to because with Marcus gone, she didn’t have anything going on. I figure we can keep hanging out some since we’re the only two singles around here. And I want to see what I can do to help Marcus; it sounds as though the kid has had it rough.”