by Heath Pfaff
I groaned in agitation.
I was glad Linna had acted, but I was also upset with Zarkov. He’d needed to act. “If it’s attacking you, it’s clearly an enemy!” I almost growled the words at him, my voice more angry than I meant it to be. “You have to defend yourself and us. It wasn’t a child anymore.”
He was looking at the little dead thing. “I just . . . she looked like my little sister.” He said, his weapon hanging loosely at his side in his hand. I’d never heard him talk about having a sister, not even once. We’d discussed our parents before, but somehow that had never come up. “What if . . . maybe we could have saved her.”
“She was dead, Zarkov. There was no coming back from that.” Linna said, her voice firm. “Lillin was right, and you have to remember, the people here aren't real anyway. If it is trying to kill us, no matter what form it comes in, you have to be ready to act. You could have gotten yourself killed, or you could have gotten one of us killed. You need to be ready next time.” Linna’s tone had a bit of a waiver to it. Killing the child had shaken her in some way.
“Next time?” He asked, still sounding out of sorts.
“The wolf has been taking people from the village for a while now. I assumed it was eating them, but I think we know the truth.” I pointed out the obvious, trying to sound sympathetic. I didn’t want Zarkov to hurt, but he did need to get focused on the task here. I wanted him to stay alive. “This isn’t easy. I know it isn’t easy Zarkov, but you need to shake it off. If the others are like that one, we’ll need to dispatch them quickly.” I hoped he remembered the lessons we’d learned in the twisted city on our last big event. We’d had to do unpleasant things then too, though remembering back it seemed that I had done most of them.
“If it comes for us, we kill it.” Linna said firmly. “This I can do.”
I gave another concerned look at Zarkov, but he was nodding. “Yeah, I can do this.” He said, but his voice lacked a certain steel and conviction. I was worried for him.
We didn’t have to go much further to put our steel to the test. Not a hundred more paces up the road two more of the people from the village sprang on us from the sides of the road. These ones weren’t just lying around waiting for us to find them. They were poised and ready to attack, surging out of the woods with hands curled like claws and teeth gnashing.
They were strong, stronger than they should have been, but they lacked finer motor control. They moved quickly, but in a jerky, spasmodic way, as though the dead tissue of their body didn’t quite work the way it should. They reminded me a bit of the metallic monsters put together in the last challenge we’d faced, but they differed in that they still looked like people. I could tell who these people had been, and though they were definitely changed, they were close enough that attacking them triggered a powerful emotional surge in me. They also died so easily. It felt as though we were attacking and killing helpless people, even if I knew logically that wasn’t the case.
Linna and Zark killed one, and I took out the other, though I noted that Linna delivered the killing blow on the one they were facing. Zark disabled the creature with several precise strikes of his weapon. I didn’t get to watch him closely, but it felt as though he was holding back.
The next wave of attackers was larger. I didn’t get time to count them properly, but there were at least six or seven, and they came on quickly. It was eerie that they attacked with no growling or noises at all. The only sound was the movement of their bodies. Fighting was generally more noisy, grunts and groans, angry yelling. That was the nature of combat, but here these remnants of the townspeople were eerily silent. I fought fiercely, though, falling back when I needed to.
They didn’t fight well. This wasn’t dangerous like the last challenge had been. Every enemy wasn’t lethal, but every enemy was a blow to the Will. I could feel the kills under my skin. It was like when I’d killed the man being dissolved by the acid. He’d needed to die, but it had left an emotional mark, one I still carried, and these were like that. I knew they weren’t really alive anymore, and not just because this scenario only existed in this bubble of space, but because whatever had been done to them by the wolf had left them changed. Knowing that, though, didn’t change how human looking they were, and how easily we could kill them. Their strength aside, it felt like slaughtering defenseless children, especially when they came in that exact guise.
We killed nearly forty of them before we were all done, and I felt every death. I looked at Linna and she looked shaken as well. Zark was grim faced and pale looking. There was no mirth or joking left in any of us as we finished the last of them. We moved on silently, and soon enough we found the wolf again.
She was slumped against an old stone tablet in a grove surrounded on all sides by ancient looking trees. The tablet was massive, every inch of it covered in writing that looked like one of the old languages we’d studied in some of our classes. I could make out a few words, though the greater meaning of the full text was beyond me.
The wolf looked up as we entered the grove, a snarl falling to its lips, but it didn’t move from where it lay. I wasn’t sure it could. It was oozing copious amounts of black blood, the snake like worms wiggling from its flesh and falling to the ground. It had clawed at the spear in its chest, trying to get it out, but that had only served to open the wound wider.
We approached it cautiously, slowly drawing near the beast as its growls intensified. It bared fangs and snapped its jaws, but the effort lacked strength. Linna came forward and grabbed the end of the spear. With a mighty heave she tore it free and the wolf collapsed, a whimper dying on its lips as more ichor and worms poured from the wound. It twitched another few times and then was still. The crawling, horrible things inside of it wiggled a few moments longer and then they too stopped.
“That’s it then.” Linna said. I nodded, but I felt cold and empty inside. It hadn’t been a great, heroic victory. In the end the stark reality of killing all those things so close to people, and finishing off a dying wolf, had been an experience that was both difficult and trying on an emotional scale that I doubted any of us had expected.
I could see the lesson we’d been meant to get here. Sometimes you had to do difficult things, and some victories wouldn’t feel like victories. We sat in silence for a few moments, no one capable of saying much.
A golem stepped from the edge of the woods, moving remarkably quiet for such a large, metallic creature. It had been here to watch and make sure we finished the task before a gate was opened up. Seeing it, as always, sent a chill down my spine.
“I hate those things.” Linna’s voice had a slight quake to it. “Last year I got nervy and decided to open the lid on one. I think the old rumors are true. They are full of dead Wardens. It was . . . well, I haven’t been able to forget about it.”
I winced and nodded, offering a look that I hoped told Linna I knew how she felt and more. I had too many memories to stifle, and it was all a little too much on top of everything else today. I felt a tear trace a line down my cheek and I hastily wiped my face on my arm.
“You alright, Lil?” Zark’s voice was soft.
I nodded. “Yeah, I’m just tired. It has been a really long day. I didn’t expect this all to be so . . . “ I shrugged and shook my head.
Zarkov seemed in agreement. “It was worse than I expected. I’ve never felt this bad inside after a mission before. It wasn’t even that physically challenging.”
“It wasn't supposed to be.” Linna said. “I think fighting those things in the woods was the entire point of this. They wanted to show us another way we could be fatigued. It worked. It will take me a long while to put this aside.”
The golem was just watching us. No doubt it had somehow communicated we were finished. We were just waiting for someone to open the door. I wondered what would have happened if we’d killed the wolf in the town and hadn’t had to come out here at all. Maybe that would have been almost impossible. Certainly it hadn't stopped easily. I thought it li
kely that most, if not all, of the teams had ended up fighting through the horde of lost town’s folk.
We lapsed into silence again, and it remained heavily upon us until the door opened and we were lead back through. There were no other groups waiting, and the Warden didn’t say much other than instructing us to see the healers if we needed to. None of us did. There wasn’t much the healers could do for how we’d been hurt.
7.3
The training began to intensify in the weeks leading up to the end. I’d lost track of time for a bit, but now it hung over me as a constant reminder that something terrible was coming. The water test. On the surface what Ghoul had told me about it sounded unpleasant but not unsurvivable. Three days locked under the water with only a straw to breathe through. That was manageable. It would be an ordeal, but all of these challenges had been ordeals. What bothered me wasn’t what I knew about the test. It was what Ghoul hadn’t told me.
I had no doubt that three days locked in the water with only minimal air would prove challenging even beyond what I could imagine, but was it really so bad, after all that we’d done, that only a couple of us would survive? All of us were strong at this point. I wouldn’t want to fight any one of us in a head on battle, not even the ones who’d been placing last in things. We were all close enough in skill that a fight could swing either way depending on environmental factors. So how would this test break us down more than others?
That question plagued me almost to the point of complete distraction.
We were sparring together in the training yards when Warden Shaw came for us. He entered the grounds and watched us for a while, which wasn’t of itself unusual, but then he called a stop to our training just a half an hour into things. We were still a week out from the water test, so I wasn’t sure what this was about, but anxiety flooded through me as we gathered around Shaw.
“You’ve been training hard. You are some of the best students we’ve ever had here. There are more of you still alive then there are normally at this point, and I’ve had several of your instructors say that they saw potential in you. That is why I’m going to do something I’ve never done before.” All eyes were focused on him as he spoke.
My heart was hammering at my chest as though it might escape at any moment, and my mind filled with the possibilities of what might be coming next. What did he intend for us? Was it good, was it bad? I wanted to hope it was something good, but it so rarely was, and this break of tradition, if that’s what it really was, was somehow threatening to me. Luckily I didn’t have to wait long.
“We are going to open two new teaching positions, and we would like two of you to fill them. This means that your training here ends and you will go back to the other school and receive a bit more training on what it means to educate in this program. This means you will never become a Warden, but you’ll be given the opportunity to pass what you have learned on to new generations. It’s important to harness the potential we have here, to feed it into our up and coming ranks.” He spoke clearly and without bluster, but his words seemed difficult for me to understand. Was he really saying that we could just leave this training? Now? After all we’d done, we could just step out of this and into a regular life?
He probably didn’t mean Zarkov and I, though. We were not like the other students. We were deadies.
“What about Lillin and I?” Zark asked suddenly. “We’re deadies. There is only one way out of this program for us. We’ve been told that since we started.”
“This extends to both of you as well. As I said, this is a first for us. Normally we do not allow students out of this part of the training, and of course there will be many, many restrictions on what you can discuss regarding what has happened here. If you were to talk about things you shouldn’t, then you would find yourself swiftly terminated.” He said this as though “terminated” was just a word that meant we’d lose our position, though we all knew exactly what he meant.
“Have you already picked the two of us you will be taking?” A girl, one of the lower ranked in the class, asked.
“The top four students will not be allowed out, and neither will the bottom five. The other sixteen of you may decide for yourselves, though only two will be taken.” Everyone was looking back and forth between their fellow students. We all knew our ranks, and I knew immediately that Zark and I weren’t getting out of this. I was dead in the middle of the pack. I could get out if I wanted, but Zark was third right now. He couldn’t. If I was going to leave, then I’d have to leave without Zarkov.
Zarkov looked at me and mouthed the word, “Go.” Very clearly. He was willing to let me go. In a way it made me angry. He didn't think I could make it to the end. He was trying to save me by pushing me out. He was trying to protect me again, and I didn’t need protecting.
This was my chance at freedom, at a normal life, or a life as normal as I could expect to have, but I already knew that I wasn’t going to take it. It would have been easy to jump forward and try to take this opportunity, but I realized I didn't want it. I wanted to finish this thing now. For the longest time I just wanted to be free, but now I wanted to break through the end of this mess. I was going to become a Warden, and then I was going to crush them, change them from within. I would stop others from dying to this training. I would stop others from becoming like Ori. My resolve strengthened.
I watched the others. Four people came forward, all of them clambering for the two positions that would take them out of the class.
“There are only two positions available. The four of you will spar, and the last two standing will be allowed to take the teaching positions.” Shaw said, voice calm and neutral. It was clear he’d planned for this possibility.
“What happens to the other two?” One of the men about my age asked. He’d been one of the four to step forward. His name was Virin, but that was really as much as I knew about him. I didn’t socialize with him at all.
“If alive, you’ll resume lessons and finish the training.” Shaw responded.
The four looked back and forth between each other, and suddenly one of them dashed forward and plunged his knife into Virin’s stomach. Virin was the largest, it was a solid tactical move. The rest of us backed off as the fight went underway. It was like watching starving dogs chase after a piece of meat. They ripped and tore at each other using everything they had at their disposal.
“You should have gone.” I heard a whisper and looked up to see that Zarkov was standing near me.
I glared up at him. “I told you that we were finishing this together. I’m not just going to run at the first chance that comes up, besides, look at them.” I nodded at the four kids fighting. Virin was laying slumped on the ground now, blood pouring out of his guts as he shook, dying on the ground. “I might have beaten them, but I might have been killed right there, and for what? A chance to live a life locked away in this school forever? That’s not what I want, Zark. It’s not enough.”
“You want to die horribly in one of these tests instead?” He asked, voice dark and angry.
“You don’t think I can make it out of this?” I asked him, voice a bit louder than I meant it to be. “Do you really not believe I can get through this?”
Zark moved a bit closer, whispering more so as not to draw attention. “Most of us can’t get through this, Lillin. I probably can’t, and I’m higher in the class then you. Most of us are going to die, and we’re running out of time. This was a chance.”
That was the truth of it then. Zark didn’t believe we could finish the training. He didn’t believe I would make it, and he didn’t believe he would either. Suddenly I saw in him what Ghoul did and I hated it. Zark, for all that he was incredibly strong, lacked the burn to succeed. I was very worried about him. He couldn’t make it like he was now.
I turned to him, my eyes locking on his. “Zark, we’re going to make it. Both of us. We can’t fail. This is difficult, but the only way we can be defeated is if we allow it to happen. We cannot lose. Do you understand?”
My voice was firm and a bit cold. I wanted to put feeling into it, to kiss him and tell him that I wanted him to make it with me, but that would have been trouble for us. Passion could come later. We needed to be steadfast now. We would have time for more personal pursuits in the future, to explore those parts of ourselves we’d had to hide all of these years.
He shook his head, the doubt clear in his eyes. “Of course, Lil, I get it. We can make it.” He said, but he didn't believe it. It made me want to cry. I felt like I was already watching him die.
“Zark, we will make it.” I told him firmly. “Both of us. It’s impossible to fail.” It was for me. I wouldn’t quit. I wouldn’t stop. I was going to be a Warden, but I couldn’t have willpower for him. I couldn’t force his determination.
“Yes.” He answered, voice more firm, but still lacking full conviction. We had a little more time. He might solid up. Maybe the final test would force him to take that step.